| It is hard to pinpoint when exactly the need for interaction between humans arose, but one thing is undeniable – interaction is an essential part of our daily lives. The majority of our daily activities involve some sort of interaction with others. From a very early age we learn how to communicate our thoughts, emotions, desires, and complains to others. The importance of individuality and own opinion is often stressed. Yet very little time is spent on teaching people to argue and disagree. In the world of individuals, the clash of opinions is unavoidable. Thus, learning to negotiate and mediate the conflicts become crucially important. Getting To Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In by Roger Fisher and William Ury and Getting Past No: Negotiating with Difficult People by William Ury are the two books by Harvard scholars, who attempt to teach people to argue effectively and reach the mutually acceptable agreements. The books stress the importance of effective communication, a theme that has been emphasized throughout both the Concepts and the Practice of Leadership classes. Part I: Outline of the main themes of the two books Getting To Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In by Roger Fisher and William Ury provides a clear, concise, and proven method of negotiating – firmly pursuing your own interests while still getting along with those whose interests and opinions conflict with your own. Negotiation is defined as “a basic means of getting what you want from others; it is a back-and-forth communication designed to reach an agreement when you and the other side have some interests that are shared and others that are opposed.” The authors point out that negotiation is a part of everyone’s life on the daily basis. There are two common ways to negotiate: hard and soft. The hard negotiator’s goal is winning at all costs, which exhausts the negotiator’s resources and harms the relationship with the other side. The soft negotiator’s goal, on the other hand, is the avoidance of conflict, which results in an amicable resolution and leaves the negotiator feeling bitter and exploited. Ultimately, neither method is completely effective. Thus, the authors propose a third method of negotiating – principled negotiation – deciding issues “on their merits rather than through a haggling process focused on what each side says it will and will not do.” The first chapter of the book describes problems that arise from usual practice of positional bargaining. The authors suggest that arguing over positions is inefficient, produces unwise agreements, and endangers the ongoing relationship. The solution lies in the following four points: (1) separate the people from the problem; (2) focus on interests and not positions; (3) invent options for mutual gain, and (4) insist on objective criteria and standard. The authors try to show readers how to remain objective in negotiations, rather than letting the emotions take control. They speak of being "soft on people and hard on principles", the idea of staying focused on the problem and not attacking or blaming people. The emphasis is also put on focusing on the long-term goals, rather than on being "right" and winning in the short term. The last three chapters deal with the situations when one side has more power than the other, when one side will not play along, and when one side uses dirty tricks. In the situation where one side has more power than the other, the suggestion is made to negotiate on merits. The solution is to develop BATNA – Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement. In the situation where the other side does not play along, the solution is to utilize negotiation jujitsu – “avoid pitting your strength against theirs directly; instead, use your skills to steps aside and turn their strength to your ends.” The authors suggest looking behind the opponent’s position, instead of attacking it; inviting the criticism and advise, instead of defending one’s own ideas; and recasting an attack on oneself as an attack on the problem. If all else fails, the authors propose that a third party be called in to help reach the consensus. This approach is called the one-text procedure. And finally, in the situation where the other side uses dirty tricks, the solution is to recognize the tactic, bring it up explicitly with the other party, and negotiate about it. The key points to remember are: to separate people from problems; to focus on interests, not positions; to insist on objective criteria, and to find alternatives for mutual gain. Getting Past No: Negotiating with Difficult People by William Ury is a sequel to his earlier collaboration with Roger Fisher. In this book, the author explores the hidden reason behind people’s reluctance to cooperate and reach an agreement. Ury suggests that there are several challenges that have to be overcome when dealing with someone who refuses to cooperate. First of all, one should remember not to react to the provocation, to keep emotions under control. The second challenge is to disarm the opponent, to break through his resistance and get him to listen. The third challenge is to change the game, and engage in problem-solving negotiation. The fourth challenge is to make it easy for the opponent to say yes, and try to make the opponent negotiate on mutual interests, instead of on positions. The final challenge is to make it hard for the opponent to say no. Ury’s book consists of five chapters that describe each challenge in detail and provide explicit suggestions to overcome them. In the first chapter, Ury describes people’s natural reactions during disagreements and warns against their dangers. Instead of reacting, he suggests mentally detaching oneself from the situation and looking at it objectively. One should identify one’s interests and one’s BATNA, decide whether to negotiate, and stay focused on one’s goals. One should also recognize the other side’s tactics and act accordingly. In the second chapter, Ury suggests stepping to the opponents’ side. It is important to listen actively, to acknowledge the opponent’s points, to agree whenever possible, to acknowledge the opponent as a person, to express one’s views without provoking disagreement, and to create favorable environment for negotiation. In the third chapter, Ury urges the negotiators to change the game and reframe. It is helpful to ask problem-solving questions and negotiate about the rules of the game. In the fourth chapter, Ury proposes to build a Golden Bridge to make it easy for the opponents to say yes. It is crucial to involve the opponent and satisfy his unmet interests. Finally, in the last chapter, Ury suggests to make it hard for the opponent to say no. The author believes it is useful to let the opponent know the consequences, to use BATNA to defuse the reaction, and to keep sharpening the opponent’s choice to force a lasting agreement, and to aim for mutual satisfaction, not just a victory. Part II: The analysis of the two books Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In by Roger Fisher and William Ury is a valuable book for everyone who wants to learn to communicate effectively with others about their interests, and to negotiate to achieve a favorable outcome in a disagreement. The book educates about basic concepts and rules of negotiation, as well as practical examples. Overall, the book is structured very logically, and the transition between the subjects and issues is very smooth. Each chapter also follows a certain pattern, and the matters are discussed thoroughly and in detail. The examples that Fisher and Ury present to support their arguments are very appropriate, effective, and persuasive. The language of the book is very simple and easy to understand. The book is valuable because it offers practical advice. Overall, the book is not only interesting, but also very useful for it provides information and strategies that can be utilized in any situation that involves negotiation and reaching an agreement. Getting Past No: Negotiating With Difficult People by William Ury is a valuable book for everyone who wants to learn how to deal with the challenges of difficult negotiations and difficult people. As negotiation becomes the primary form of decision-making, this book proves to be important, because it provides practical strategies and tools for effective conflict resolution. The book is well-written, straightforward, on target and extremely practical. The language is simple and easy to understand. It is highly readable, uncomplicated guide to resolving conflicts of every imaginable dimension. The book is powerful, incisive, and persuasive. The two books present simple, but powerful ideas and excellent advice on how to approach the negotiation problems. They do not contain quick tricks; instead they provide an overall approach to conflict resolution. The books show people how to change their negotiating strategies and develop lasting problem-solving skills that may be used in various situations. Part III: Lessons learned from the books Getting To Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In by Roger Fisher and William Ury teaches many valuable lessons. One of the most useful lessons for the novice negotiators is "focusing on interests, not positions”. The book teaches to spot when someone is being positional and to be able to disarm them quickly, but tactfully, by moving the discussion to the various parties' interests. The book is most useful in negotiating any sort of economic transaction, but is applicable in many other areas. The main things to be learned from this book are the tools that help one to recognize value. The parts that probably are the most useful are the notions of focusing on interests rather than positions, and finding alternatives that will allow both parties in the negotiation to gain something. The idea of moving away from positions to finding the common ground of shared interests is one that is particularly useful in that it can be applied to any situation, be it a parent/child conflict, a work situation, or any negotiation. The great thing about the book is that most of the information the authors provide is common sense and is probably familiar to the audience already. And the authors duly note that reading the book about negotiation and learning the strategies is only the first step to becoming a successful negotiator. Only by practicing and learning from doing can one become truly skillful. Finally, the most important lesson that the book provides is that negotiation is not about winning, it is about the method of achieving a better process for dealing with people’s differences. The method of principled negotiation in the long run produces substantive outcomes that are efficient and less costly to human relationships. Getting Past No: Negotiating With Difficult People by William Ury teaches how to act in the situation when the opponent is unreasonable in his tactics and demands, or when the opponent is not willing to negotiate. Ury provides strategies on how to find common grounds with an angry boss, an unreasonable client, a hostile colleague, a deceitful business partner, or a stubborn spouse. The five-step strategy, that Ury puts forth, teaches how to disarm though bargainers, dismantle stone walls, deflect attacks, and dodge dirty tricks. The most important lesson to be learned from the book is how to win the opponents over, instead of winning over them. The book teaches to acknowledge the adversary’s point without conceding, and how to present one’s own views without provoking argument. Part IV: Waiving in the material learned in class Throughout the course, the importance of clear communication has been emphasized. A leader has to be able to express his or her thoughts and opinions explicitly and effectively. This coincides with Ury’s suggestion that in a negotiation with a difficult person, one should be direct and make his or her interests explicit. Being culturally sensitive becomes useful when negotiating with someone of a different background. Cross-cultural understanding and the nuances with which people from other backgrounds approach situations are important during negotiations. This knowledge is helpful when examining the opponent’s tactics, reactions, responses, behaviors, decisions, and actions. It is important for both sides to know which individual characteristics do the negotiators see as most important for resolving the differences successfully. Ury mentions the mental detachment from the situation, which corresponds to Heifetz’s suggestion of “going to the balcony” and reexamining the situation objectively. Nancy Adler mentions William Ury’s negotiation strategies in a chapter of her book, International Dimensions of Organizational Behavior. Because building personal relationships before reaching any important decisions is important in many cultures throughout the world, Ury’s suggestion of seeing the situation from the opponent’s point of view becomes very useful. Conclusion Negotiation and conflict resolution have become important decision-making strategies in the recent years. Furthermore, because reaching agreement affects virtually every aspect of everyone’s daily life, learning how to negotiate effectively is crucial. Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In by Roger Fisher and William Ury and Getting Past No: Negotiating With Difficult People by William Ury provide knowledge, tools, and strategies to develop the skills of principled negotiation, which is effective and more beneficial in the long run, than other types of negotiation. The books stress the importance of effective communication, reaching consensus, and building of long-lasting personal relationships. The authors put forth ideas and concepts that are useful in a variety of business and personal situations. |