Eyes Wide Shut

I sit here in the dark
The sun is shining, my eyes are closed.
Outside there are trees, flowers, a park.
I keep my eyes shut, my hands carved into fists.

Voices drone on and on...
In the background,
I want to get up and run.
My eyes stay shut, blocking out the sound.

I am a prisoner
Stuck where I don't belong
Inside, in the dark, I blunder
My way through what feels wrong.

I should be outside
Where I wont see, where I wont look,
Where its light
Where there's a whole world, like in some amazing book.

Sleep is my escape.
I wish I had what it takes
To forsake,
To stop having to fake,
My whole life, everything and all that I am
And break the walls of the dam.

I keep my eyes shut.