The last of the Special Disclaimers!

Hello out there in Anime Haven land…why haven’t you signed my guest book!!!

Oh well guess it’s not important. I still don’t own the rights to Eva, or this story. I hope you’ve been liking the exclusive MST but after this one going to be going back to DS/AH exclusives (mainly due to ff.net banning msts)

Shall we begin? Lets Shall.

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Misato walking into her apartment: I don’t believe Rei could show so much emotion.

Maya: She looked mildly upset, I was shocked.

Ritsuko: Yeah that mild look meant she was WAY passed pissed.

Maya: Those two need some sort of mother or guardian figure…I feel sorry for them.

Misato: Don’t look at me ‘grabbing a beer and sitting down’ my hands are tied with the two I got.

Ritsuko: Magi.

Misato/Ritsuko: So, looks like if you want them…they’re yours.

Maya blushing: I didn’t mean…I guess…alright.

Ritsuko: Speaking of the kids where are they?

Maya sitting down with a piece of cake: Wanted to wish Rei II a happy birthday

Rei III: The door to your room is locked Major, may I break it down?

Misato: MY ROOM! SHINJI-KUN!

Ritsuko: Oh…boy.

Maya: Wasn’t he…you don’t think that they’re all…do you?

Misato: First off Rei sit down, they’ll be no door breaking today. You said you didn’t want to share birthdays so you don’t get the present.

Ritsuko: Second?

Misato: Second, I don’t want to know what’s going on behind that door. One way or the other let them keep that secret.

Maya: That’s very trusting of you Misato-san.

Ritsuko: Well we can’t bother them, so what do we do?

Rei III sits down with a detectable amount of depression.

Misato: ‘Is it me or is this Rei more open?’

Ritsuko: Lets do what we always do when we’re bored, watch movies.

Maya: ‘Only movie I saw was with me and Shinji-kun…’ you sure? ‘looking at Rei III’

Rei III: A distraction will serve to lower the feeling of absolute rage I feel.

Ritsuko: You keep it well hidden ‘snickers’ alright lets watch.

Misato putting last tape in: Lets pick up where they left off.

Maya: Won’t we be lost?

Misato/Ritsuko: Does it matter?

Rei III: If you don’t want your room’s enclosure to be damaged I suggest you hurry.

Misato: Fine fine…’taking orders from a kid…what next.’

(BEGIN MST!!! Look for >>>)

Parts 1-3 are available at http://www.teloong.mcmail.com/

Yes, it does help if you've read them before.

>>>Maya: See?

>>>Ritsuko: I don’t have time to watch the whole thing.

This is a LIME. That means naughty things. You have been

warned. This is also a PARODY. OOC warning. PWP warning.

Tramples over lots of other fics. C&C, pretty please?

>>>Misato: Ah the joys of fresh fruit.

>>>Ritsuko: Do you ever watch a movie that doesn’t have at least adult themes?

>>>Misato: What fun would that be?

E.L.Toh presents

RAMEN 4

an Eva/Ranma/El-Hazard x-over fanfic

Series are property of GAINAX/Rumiko Takahashi/Pioneer AIC.

"Oh, I am blessed indeed. With the stimulus of passion

spiced ramen, Rei and Asuka have found it in themselves

to reveal their feelings for me!" declared Shinji.

>>>Rei III: Shinji appears overly happy, what happened to him?

>>>Misato: Lets say that when they ‘revealed’ their feelings…it wasn’t with words.

Rei in her frumpy school uniform appeared on his right.

>>>Maya: So frumpy means wrinkled?

"Ah, Rei! How the name Ayanami befits you!

>>>Rei III: It does.

>>>Misato/Ritsuko: ‘What does it even mean?’

Waves whose beauty suggest forms woven in silk. Like the moon, a cold distant radiance full of mystery!"

>>>Rei III blushes: This is most enjoyable.

>>>Maya: Shinji-kun became a poet?

Right on cue, Asuka in her yellow spaghetti strap

sundress appeared on Shinji's left. "Asuka. Sweet scent

of tomorrow. Fiery hair and fiery heart!

>>>Ritsuko: Douses fire on those that piss her off.

>>>Misato: The lucky few that aren’t stepped on by her Eva.

Red is indeed your province - so full of passion, so full of life!"

>>>Rei III: The symbol of violence, yes red does reflect her.

Shinji drew himself up to his full height. "And The One

I Love Is..."

"..."

"I cannot decide!"

>>>Ritsuko: Where would the fun be then?

>>>Misato: Trying to convince him who he loves more ‘smiles.’

Shinji wept as he put an arm around each girl's waist, "I must have you both!"

>>>Ritsuko: When did Shinji become a normal male?

Shinji's form went limp as Asuka's fist slammed into

his face. "Anta baka!? It's not for *you* to choose!"

>>>Maya: If not him…then who?

>>>Rei III: Even after being complimented she crushes his nose, no pleasing her.

retorted Asuka who then slung his right arm across her shoulder.

"Shinji-kun does not need to choose," added Rei as she

repeated Asuka's motion with Shinji's left arm. "Afterall,

it is Friday. We are to share him today."

With that, the girls dragged Shinji off to his room.

>>>Rei III: What is the meaning of this?

>>>Misato: The three of you share more than space?

>>>Maya: Not with him unconscious like that, ‘odd how things work out though.’

***

"Ah, Ms Jinnai, we finally meet at last," said Nabiki

as she rose from her desk. "You honor us with your presence."

"No need to stand on ceremony, and 'Nanami' will be

fine," replied the carrot-haired damsel as she shook

Nabiki's offered hand.

>>>Maya: Do you know these people?

>>>Ritsuko: Helped fund Nerv…scary scary people.

"'Nabiki' then."

"So, Nabiki, now we are done with the pleasantries,

shall we get down to business? What can do you want from

me?"

>>>Misato: Blood or other bodily fluids?

>>>Rei III: My assumption would be money.

"I am proposing a Tendou-Jinnai joint venture for the

largest privatisation program the world has ever seen."

>>>Maya: Don’t they have laws against that?

>>>Ritsuko: Yes, laws prohibiting the formation of uber-monopolies.

"Oh," said Nanami, "you mean now you've gotten rid of SEELE, you intend to corporatise NERV?"

"Indeed."

>>>Ritsuko/Misato: How the hell will they do that!

"Heh," snorted Nanami, "you'd keep NERV all to yourself if you had the funds to do it."

"Ah, a display of that penetrating vision of Nanami

Jinnai," smiled Nabiki, "yes, you're absolutely right.

But even Tendou Corp can't handle this all by itself."

>>>Misato: The market for adult video’s alone would be to much.

>>>Rei III: I would never consent to that.

>>>Ritsuko: IF they others do…you sister can fill in for you.

>>>Rei III: In that case, I would demand 15% of the gross.

"So you want the Jinnai Foundation to provide a huge

capital injection of cash, equity and debt. In return,

we get 50% share in a couple of biomechanical robots.

Swell, I can't for the life of me see what's the catch,"

noted Nanami dourly.

>>>Ritsuko: Debt enforcement will have a new terrifying catch.

>>>Maya: Eva’s used as tax collectors, now that’s an incentive to pay.

"Now, now, Nanami," said Nabiki as she wagged her finger,

"Demon Gods may be able to give Evangelions a run for their money but that's not the main point. Think of all the spin-offs that NERV can generate!"

"NERV mugs?" asked Nanami sceptically.

>>>Rei III: Why would Nerv employee’s mug people?

>>>Maya: Coffee mugs.

***

Shinji had always been a light sleeper. And now the doorbell roused him from his slumber.

'I wonder who it is,' he thought as he gently pried

himself from the double embrace of his blue-haired and

red-headed goddesses.

>>>Rei III blushes: So we became one?

>>>Ritsuko: More like three became two…or would it be one…’grabs her hair in frustration.’

>>>Maya’s jaw drops: Shinji-kun is…is that possible for a boy his age?

Throwing on a bathrobe, he made his way to the door and opened it.

"Mr. Shinji Ikari?" said the Tendou Corp deliveryman.

"Yes, that's me."

>>>Misato: IF his friends sent another bunch of strippers.

>>>Rei III: Why did he need to put the robe on…the view was ‘interesting.’

"This is for you," said the man as he handed over a

large carton to a bleary-eyed Shinji, "Ms Tendou says

that you and the girls are to fill out the evaluation

forms for these products as carefully as you can."

>>>Ritsuko: So people just drop boxes off at your place and force consumer assistance?

>>>Misato: How I got started with Yebisu. Man came over said, “Try this?” I did and look at me now.

"Ummm. Sure," murmured Shinji as he signed the counter

foil to acknowledge receipt of the package and then placed

it on the kitchen table.

>>>Maya: He accepts boxes from strangers without asking.

>>>Rei III: Trust has its pitfalls, ‘Mental note- send Shinji ‘special’ boxes’

As Shinji undid the plain paper wrapping, he started

to frown. He blinked. He then rubbed the sleep out of

his eyes and stared. He blinked again. Slumping into his

chair, he muttered, "They've got to be kidding."

>>>Misato busts out laughing: Well he would need them.

>>>Ritsuko: After the LCL wears off.

The labels included "Eva Unit00 (sky blue) - cool minty

flavor. Eva Unit01 (purple) - passion fruit flavor. Eva

Unit02 (red) - strawberry flavor and ribbed for extra sensation!"

>>>Rei III: Why would balloons be ribbed and flavored?

>>>Ritsuko/Misato pale.

>>>Maya: Um…Ayanami-san, those…aren’t balloons. ‘Maya then explains things to >>>Rei…who’s face turns red then unreadable.’

Emblazoned cheerfully above those was the NERV logo

with its usual motto replaced with: "EVA-Brand condoms.

When you need protection as good as an A.T. Field."

>>>Rei III: And cut your partner in half after the experience.

>>>Misato: How did they know…the correct size Ritsuko?

>>>Ritsuko: So I sold his data to some companies, was strapped for cash.

***

"Oooookay," said Nanami. "That just might work. Are you sure you've worked out all the problems?"

"Well..." hesitated Nabiki.

"Well, what?" pressed Nanami.

"Well, you see, there's this guy who's filing a lawsuit

against us, saying that we stole his idea," explained Nabiki.

"I can't believe anyone would dare to sue you."

>>>Ritsuko: Somebody with a death wish.

>>>Misato: Can I launch the N2 mine or do you want this one?

"Well, he did. And he's got tones of witnesses. And

he can't be bought off - he wants to have his creative

input acknowledged and before you ask, no, he can't be

intimidated either.

>>>Rei III: Anybody ‘flashes her At-Field’ can be intimidated.

Those otakus love his work and are waiting for him to finish his series. They'd raise hell if he suddenly... disappeared. No, too risky."

"He's an artist?" asked Nanami.

"A part-time writer. He's giving us hell over the

jelly donut chain as well on the same grounds,"

>>>Misato: I love jelly dounuts!

>>>Rei III: Is that why your figure has expanded as it has?

>>>Misato: I…’Why do they have to be so damn honest!’

replied Nabiki as she pressed a button on her desk, "computer, call file #42."

A holographic projection of the file appeared. Details

and particulars scrolled rapidly past a file photo.

"Andrew-chan!?"

"You know this guy?" asked Nabiki with just a hint of surprise.

>>>Ritsuko: Most older people do.

>>>Maya: Explains why I don’t, Ritsuko-sempai you’re getting old.

>>>(yes I’m an old fanfic fart, remember when jelly donut’s first ep was out)

"Err..." Nanami maintained a near-perfect business

poker face. Expressionless. But not quite perfect due to

the colour that was announcing its presence on her cheeks

and ears.

>>>Rei III: Her emotions show perfectly clear to even the lowest of people.

>>>Ritsuko: Would you rather she have NO emotions like you?

>>>Rei III smirks: No emotions? Before you said I was ‘pissed’ should I show you more?

"You do know him."

"Y...you could could say that..."

"Oh yeah, you were at the 1997 Chicken Ball Awards with

him. Something about you providing him with... inspiration?"

>>>Ritsuko: Sound like how you inspired Kaji in the past?

>>>Misato reaching for her sidearm: Care to say that again?

"Okay! Okay!" exclaimed Nanami. "Just leave it to me,

I'll talk to him and get it sorted out!"

"Oh. So he *can* be bribed afterall?" asked Nabiki with

a suggestively raised eye brow.

"Shaddup, Nabs."

>>>Maya: Does ‘that’ attempt work on all men?

>>>Misato: Most, few of them are tricky devils. Shinji’s one of them.

"And speaking of which, you could test some of our products

while you're at it as well," grinned Nabiki as she handed

Nanami a colour catalogue.

***

"So what do you think of this, Shinji-kun?" asked Rei as

she sashayed past, giving him a good view of how the lacy

snow-white lingerie enhanced her already very attractive...

attributes.

>>>Rei III: I am very attractive.

>>>Maya fuming: How can she have a better body than me! Oops.

"Gurrrk... *SPURT*..." responded Shinji.

Asuka rolled out the measuring tape and then started

recording results on a clipboard. "Strangled Whine Factor

of 8.9 and an Active Spurting Nosebleed with distance of

3.2 meters,"

>>>Misato: That’s it, expected more from THAT type of show.

>>>Ritsuko: Maybe he’s calmed down a bit after sharing his bed so much.

said Asuka with a hint of envy in her voice,

"Say, Rei... could you design something for me? And.."

>>>Rei III: If you beg.

"...make it red," Rei smoothly cut it. "I will have to

think about the appropriate design specifications that will

titillate and enrapture the fanboys."

>>>Maya: Doesn’t she mean fanboy?

>>>Rei III: I model for Shinji-kun, what she does is her own business.

"Thanks Rei," said Asuka in appreciation, "but I think

Shinji's had enough for one day."

>>>Ritsuko: How can she tell, the paleness of him or the fact he’s unconscious?

>>>Misato: Both.

Their aforementioned test subject was slumped, unconscious,

in the chair, a small trickle of blood running down both his

nostrils.

"Aww... you're no fun, Shinji-kun," said Rei. But unlike

in Evanjellydonut, her tone was completely monotonic

>>>Maya: Ayanami, you need to practice your voice lessons.

>>>Ritsuko: Unless you like sounding like a computer.

and her

pout had the feel of Seven of Nine practising smiling i.e. not

very spontaneous at all and possibly eliciting clown phobia in

some of our more sensitive readers.

>>>Misato starts laughing again: Is it even worth doing if you fail that badly!

>>>Rei III pouts…just as bad: I’m trying.

"But that's *why* he's so fun," grinned Asuka predatorily

(and this was totally natural - bared teeth and all), "he

doesn't seem to get jaded at all."

>>>Girls: He doesn’t…that IS a good thing.

>>>Misato: Being so popular, Shinji-kun seems unchanged, thank Kami-sama.

Rei shrugged while mentally making a note to practice the

predatory grin. "Thank you for lending me the chair."

"No prob," replied Asuka as she began to undo the leather

straps around Shinji's wrists and ankles.

>>>Maya: You forced him to participate!

>>>Rei III: He appeared to have enjoyed himself. If leather is all that is >>>required than the cows should be glad to die.

***

"You mean Rei designed all of this?" asked Nanami in

disbelief as she leafed through the catalogue.

>>>Ritsuko: If you turn the dial on her weird-shit-o meter up a notch.

>>>Misato: That stuff is racy even for me.

"The girl's got talent, doesn't she? Must come from being

repressed for so long," said Nabiki as she recalled fond

memories of how, in the past, she had made money from selling

photos of a lingerie clad female(?) to an idiot.

>>>Rei III: Photos will result in termination of life.

>>>Maya: Maybe that repression is taking on different forms now.

"Though she models her stuff only for her dear Shinji-kun. No photos,

nothing."

"Pity," said Nanami, "I could see a huge demand just for

the catalogues if she did."

>>>Rei III: I feel dirty thinking of the possibilities.

>>>Ritsuko: I’d have thought you’d be used to old men seeing you nude.

>>>Rei III: Don’t make me destroy you doctor.

"Well, it's better for the product line in the long run.

Has to maintain a certain dignity and mystique," said Nabiki.

'Though one learns not to argue with Rei "A.T.Field" Ayanami.'

>>>Misato: They do love to flash that thing around don’t they.

>>>Rei III: It has its uses ‘uses her field to vaporize a fly.’

"True, true," mused Nanami, "and the 'Ayanami' name for the

product line is perfect. Confluence of her name and poetry,

suggesting subtlety as well as sophistication.

>>>Maya: It does?

>>>Ritsuko: I think they’re hoping for the fanboy vote, I pity their girlfriends.

>>>Misato: You mean fanfboys have girlfriends?

We'll easily bag the higher margin end of the market."

"So have you decided what to wear for you-know-who?"

"Shut. Up."

"Maybe you're into something more exotic?" asked Nabiki.

>>>Ritsuko: What’s more exotic than that stuff, full frontal nudity?

***

"Please, Asuka..." whined Shinji as he strained against

the handcuffs, "do we really need to do this?"

>>>Maya blushes: Handcuffs?

>>>Misato: Just one pair? Shinji-kun usually has about three or four.

"Urusai, Baka Shinji," snapped Asuka, "You know you love

it."

Shinji, face down on the bed, continued to struggle -

albeit a little feebly. He knew it was futile but his

efforts always seemed to please Asuka.

>>>Ritsuko: She just needs her power fix.

>>>Maya: I fear for Shinji-kun’s life.

And when Asuka was pleased, it was very... rewarding.

>>>Misato: I don’t think I needed to hear that about my ward.

"Alright now, hold still," commanded Asuka.

Shinji braced for impact.

*THWACK. THWACK. THWACK. THWACK. THWACK.*

>>>All look away: Ouch, ouch, ouch.

>>>Rei III: The 2^nd could stand for a psyc evaluation.

"Impressive, most impressive," noted Rei, "no breaks on

the skin but the result is very clear. Very legible.. though

I would have preferred it if you could have inscribed something

else."

>>>Misato: She has excellent control.

>>>Ritsuko: Her spelling could use some work.

"Sorry," smiled Asuka apologetically as she carressed her

cat o' nine tails, "guess I couldn't help it."

>>>Maya: Sempai don’t you…have…

>>>Misato/Rei III look at Maya: Go on.

>>>Maya: Eep.

Shinji's bare bottom, in a font made of straight red lash

marks, declared 'PROPERTY OF SOHRYU ASUKA LANGELY.' His face

buried in a pillow, Shinji moaned.

>>>Misato: Must feel terrible to be reduced to an object of desire.

>>>Ritsuko: Or a whipping practice dummy.

"Oh dammit, a spelling error," grumbled Asuka. "And it's not

like I can get rid of it with blanko or a backspace key."

>>>Maya: How long do whip marks stay on the body?

>>>Rei III: A long time.

>>>Misato/Ritsuko/Maya look at Rei III: ‘How the hell does she know that?’

"It is alright. If John Biles and Rod M can make that error

occassionally in 'Children of an Elder God', you should be

allowed that sometimes as well," said Rei.

>>>Rei III: Children of an Elder God…sounds interesting.

>>>Misato: Have to try to rent that one.

"Yeah, but Langley's my surname! I should be able to get my

own surname right!" Asuka's rant ended abruptly as her eyes

widened in fear and realization.

>>>Ritsuko: She finally realized she complains too much?

>>>Rei III: Shinji broke free and strangled her?

Back pedalling to put distance between herself and Rei, she exclaimed, "You've *read* CoaEG!?"

"Up to the first third of Part 13:'Saving the Dead'. You seem concerned."

"Of course I am! Gendou ended up in hospital because you

read Evanjellydonut too many times!

>>>Misato: WE GOT TO GET THAT ONE!

>>>Ritsuko: Rei you and your sister will watch the movie everyday for a week!

I'm not going to have my brain eaten raw by you!" said Asuka as she thought about fleeing to Germany (with Shinji slung over her shoulder, of course).

>>>Maya: Carry on or baggage?

>>>Ritsuko: I say baggage, she’d be to tempted to join the mile-high club if he was her carry on.

"Not raw," said Rei, quoting from the '99 Christmas CoaEG

omake. Not a good sign.

Asuka seemed only slightly placated by this tiny concession.

"...with some fava beans and a nice Chianti," said Rei

before she starting making slurping noises through her teeth.

>>>Ritsuko: Does anybody else feel nauseous after that?

>>>Misato: Yes! Never do that again Rei!

>>>Maya: Sounded like a dog stuck in a vacuum cleaner.

"You're... joking, right?" asked Asuka, still in a

defensive combat stance.

Rei considered it for a moment. "Yes, a joke." Then she

decided to practice her predatory grin.

"WAAAUGH!!!"

>>>Room busts out laughing.

>>>Misato: You have to alter your eyebrows when you do that.

>>>Ritsuko: It looks so FAKE!

>>>Rei III looks at the floor: I did my best.

***

Despite her ability to read people very well, Nabiki was

undecided as to whether Nanami looked fascinated or disgusted

as she leafed through the pages of costumes (most of them

leather), implements and contraptions that Asuka had designed

for the 'Devil Girl' range of products.

>>>Misato pales: Dear Kami she needs help.

>>>Ritsuko: I think she has great talent…I could see myself with several of those.

>>>Maya blushes: They all have horns, Asuka is taking the devil bit to far.

"Haven't you got anything that doesn't sell sex?" asked

Nanami as she finally put down the catalogue.

>>>Rei III: Not from ‘her’ book, the 2^nd is arguably obsessed with that topic.

"There are some ideas floating around - 'Winter Fresh LCL'<

and 'Unholy Miracle Gro' from Akagi Laboratories.

>>>Misato: ‘Unholy?’ what are you up to Rits?

>>>Ritsuko: Hey, I didn’t know the contract was written in blood ok! It was an accident.

Maybe a set of highly inaccurate NERV action figures."

"Nabiki..."

"Yes, Nanami?"

"Why do I see more litigation coming our way?"

>>>Rei III: Because you do improper things without asking?

>>>Maya: You abuse creative license?

>>>Misato: You haven’t made a Nerv issued brand of BEER YET!

***

Tappity-tap.

There was a muffled response through the floor.

Operative A shook his head and applied the hammer against the floor again.

Tappity-tap. Tappity-tap.

The response of "...am warning... not finish..." could be

made out through the concrete between this story and the one

below.

>>>Rei III: He is striking the concrete floor with a hammer?

"Hey," said Operative B as she adjusted her earphones,

"his phone's ringing. Our phone tap indicates it's from Nanami

Jinnai... she wants to talk and is coming over to see him. He

says ok... Conversation's ended."

>>>Ritsuko: Bet its to ‘convince’ him to drop the law-suit.

>>>Maya: She has an ample collection to choose from to do it with too.

"Video survelliance shows that the subject is stopping

work and starting to prepare dinner. Hmmm... looks like he's

bringing out candles, red wine, the works," reported Operative

C, "should we upgrade our alert status?"

>>>Ritsuko: To what ‘played out?’

>>>Misato: I’d settle for take out, a few beers, and a movie.

>>>Maya: I’d settle for just talking.

"No. Haven't you read the file? They know each other pretty

well. She's not a security risk. Radio in to HQ that Nanami

swinging by for dinner and maybe more.

>>>Ritsuko: That is a BIG maybe.

>>>Rei III: Should have used ‘certainty’ instead.

Make sure she's let through and not given any problems," said Operative A as he consulted his standard operating procedure manual.

"Further to that," added Operative A, "we are to cease all

forms of survelliance activity on the subject for the next 24

hours. That includes the tappity-tapping as well."

>>>Rei III: Is that where the sounds eminating at my apartment come from?

>>>Ritsuko whistles softly and looks away.

"Oh swell," grumbled Operative B, "another 24 hours he won't be spending to finish up EJD."

"Now, now, B," chided Operative A, "he might get another

burst of inspiration from her visit. Goodness knows he gets

enough of our type of motivation."

>>>Maya: What good it does.

>>>Rei III: ‘Mental note-search other apartments for people with hammers.’

An hour later.

"Nanami Jinnai has arrived," reported Operative C.

"Okay, that's it! Shut everything off. The next shift will

simply take up a defensive perimeter a discrete distance away.

Other than that, Operation Andrew-Please-Finish-Evanjellydonut

is off for tonight. Say, B, you wanna grab a beer?"

"Sure," shrugged Operative B.

>>>Misato: Now who would fund that operation?

>>>Ritsuko: To many people to count.

>>>(WHERE IS CHAPTER 5!!!!)

***

"Hello Spatula Girl," greeted Shampoo, "is coincidence.

And you making personal delivery? Is unusual."

"Yeah, sugar," returned Ukyou, "well, Nabiki pays well

to have these special customers looked after real good.

>>>Ritsuko: Who started this whole mess?

>>>Misato: The purple haired one did…with ramen.

>>>Rei III: Looks as if they are attempting to keep the situation alive.

I've

got one vegetarian, one brewmeister-saukeraut special, one

fisherman's treasure, one curry beef with beer sauce,

>>>Maya: How long can you go without SOMETHING with beer in it?

>>>Misato opening a can: As long as I want, but I don’t like to waste time.

one non-descript completely usual okonomiyaki.

>>>Maya: Shinji-kun really needs to be a little more outgoing.

A bottle of my best sake as well. Absolutely no almonds or almond products in any of it. How about you?"

>>>Ritsuko: No almonds?

>>>Misato: Shinji-kun eats one and stay away from the bathroom for a few hours.

"Shampoo have one garlic ramen with no meat, one deluxe

pork ramen super-size, one ramen with herring, mackeral

and salmon, one chilli beef ramen and one house ramen.

>>>Misato: How are we going to eat THAT much food?

>>>Ritsuko: Could be ‘working’ up an appetite.

With bottle of Tsingtao beer. Besides no almond, customer also request make sure no passion spice in food."

>>>Girls: BOO!!!

The lift door opened and they headed for the Katsuragi apartment.

***

"It's really nice of Rei to treat us to dinner," said Shinji.

"Yeah," said Misato who was already stuffing her face, "and

I haven't had Tsingtao in ages!"

"Wark. Wark."

>>>Misato: He’s so cute when he’s happy!

>>>Ritsuko: Does his backpack ever rust?

>>>Misato: Occationally, leaves a nasty ring around the tub.

"I think Wondergirl wants to apologise for making me feel

like my life was threatened, for reminding Misato that she has

no life..."

>>>Misato: HEY!

>>>Rei III: You don’t feel threatened now? I must have lost my edge.

"Hey!" protested Misato.

"...and making sure Shinji gets lots of nutritious food so

that he can..."

>>>Ritsuko: He must need to eat A LOT then.

>>>Rei III: How many calories does becoming one spend?

>>>Misato/Ritsuko: You tell her Maya.

"Your life was threatened? How?" asked Shinji, wanting to

change the topic.

"It's nothing. I just should have remembered that she's a

vegetarian - that means she won't eat my brain.&quuot;

>>>Rei III: It is too risky, could contaminate myself.

>>>Maya: Is the brain considered meat? It’s not a muscle.

>>>Ritsuko: One- Rei you creeping us out, Two- no it isn’t.

"That is correct," said Rei appearing suddenly and startling

everyone.

"Geez, I hate it when you do that," came another CoaEG omake

quote.

>>>Misato: We HAVE to find that one, it’d be to good to pass up.

***

Meanwhile...

"Andrew-chan..."

"Yes, Nanami-chan? Oh my. Gurrrk.... *SPURT*..."

>>>Ritsuko: Now that was a nosebleed.

THE END

I wish to thank Andrew Huang for granting permission for

use of material from Ejd and allowing the insertion of his

person and his own conception of Nanami into the fic. His

comments and criticism were also critical in preventing this

fic from crossing a very fine line, ethically and creatively.

Thanks also to John Biles and Rod M for giving permission for

use of situations and quotes from 'Children of an Elder God'

as well as to Alain Gravel for okaying the parody scene of

'TOILI'. Their comments have been invaluable as well.

Completed 31 Jan 2000.

contact: toheel@singnet.com.sg or teloong@cwcom.net

archive: http://www.teloong.mcmail.com/

SEELE - A NGE Review Group

http://www.oocities.org/Tokyo/Garden/5176/main.html

(end MST)

Misato: See wasn’t that a good present?

Maya: You have odd taste in presents…and lets hope they don’t ‘harm’ Shinji-kun.

Ritsuko: I don’t want to know what is happening behind that door.

Rei III: I do, I will repay you for the door. ‘She stands walks to the door, at-fields the lock off and enters.’

Ritsuko: You don’t think…?

Misato: I honestly don’t have a clue. So who’s up for some drinking and cake?

Maya: I’ll have a little.

Ritsuko: It’s why I’m here.

Misato breaks out a 6-pack: So you sure you want to be the Reis’ guardian?

Maya slamming the can: They need somebody ta teach um stuff…can’t have Shin-chan doing all that.

Ritsuko: Chan? What happened between you two?

Misato: A steamy romance in the quaranteen bubble?

Maya now completely hammered: Na…but the movie had it…I kissed ‘im…boy can he kiss good…but he’s ma friend.

Ritsuko shocked: MAYA!

Misato: Oh calm down, something like that was bound to happen. Either Shinji, Makoto, or Shigeru.

Ritsuko: With those choices I guess its ok.

Misato eating last slice of cake: So what do we do next?

Ritsuko: I don’t know honestly. I want to run some more tests on the twins but they’d kill me.

Maya: WHAT YOU SAY BOUT MY MAMA! ‘collapses on the floor’

Ritsuko: Just can’t handle her liquor.

Misato: Well looks like we really missed the party.

Ritsuko: Wasn’t a party for us, that’s Shinji’s party.

Misato: What to get him…what to get him.

Ritsuko looking towards her room: Was it really his idea, the speedo?

Misato: Shinji’s! No. I told him I was going to rent a rabbit suit for him. Then tricked him into the speedo. You think he would do that himself?

Ritsuko: No, he doesn’t seem the exotic type. Good call though.

Misato: His following will be happy, and with them happy he’ll be happy.

Ritsuko:…This sucks, only decent man we know is 15.

Misato: Lets go bar hopping.

Ritsuko putting Maya on couch: You got it.

And the duo left after taking a peek through the crack in Misato’s door.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

MST author notes.

I loved this story when I first read it oh so long ago. It is a bit racy but no real lemon content so I could enjoy it. I must sound like a choir boy but I really don’t care for lemons.

I still haven’t heard from the CoaEG people but I HOPE to, I really want to mst that story. It is one of my top 3 fics!

My Nadesico fic is moving along rather well.

I thought the mst for this chapter was best done by people beside the pilots as it dealt with marketing.

Few people asked me what really happened in Misato’s room, did they? Didn’t they?

To answer those questions I repeat my statement, its up to you the reader. I like letting people fill in their own gaps. Why I leave some of them open like that. Not everybody agrees with everybody else, so by doing this I allow both sides of the coin to remain happy.

I know not many read my mst’s anymore, nor my writings in general. But it brings me joy so I continue.

Thanks again to Chewy and Golden Kitsune for pre-reading

Ja-mata

Zentrodie (zentrodie@secondimpact.com)

p.s. if you know the writers of CoaEG PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE ASK THEM if I can mst their story!!!