--A GRAPHIC DESCRIPTION OF A NIGHT GONE JUST PLAIN WRONG! TRANSCRIBED FROM AN E-MAIL SENT TO ME BY NEW YORK PERFORMANCE ARTIST DEREK DAVID
subject:ENDLESS SATURDAY NIGHT
Dear julian ,I had a tremendously bad drunken saturday night last -So bad in fact that i thot you might enjoy it.The young lady im working with today is a devout christian and she would say my eyes had been blinded by satan; but if S.was involved he was the wrinkled old geezer that envited me to go and sit with his nieces. He bought us a pitcher of cloudy beer and we all introduced and started talking and everything was lively and good.But it became apparent that the younger of the three was changing into some kind of monster.
She drank her third beer in a single pull,and began laughing so hard she coudn't stop. I made some kind of judgement or whatever like "Anyone that gets this high on a few beers will be a legendary lover AND THE DRUNK GIRL THINKS THIS IS A PROMISE,and sputters bettween laughs in a retarded voice "I WANNA LAY YOU".and I dont feel so happy and comfortable anymore.
The two smarter nieces are hiding the beer from the other and beer crazed now she keeps grabbing for my glass.there is no more talking except for the drunken problem that we all seem to share the responsibility for. she spills her water and laughs and throws a soggy napkin at me" Excuse me "I say and she leaps up "Take me home with you "And you know Im part dog and I actually consider what it would take to make this girl fuckable.I say since we dont have a box of condoms and a vial of speed it aint gonna happen.When I came back from the toilet the drunk [girl]was gone- unfortunately so were all our beers and our welcome in that bar for the night. Her sister had come to take her home and the two supposed smart nieces were looking sheepish and shifty.They invited me to come to another bar across the street but I got on my bike and went home.I felt soiled like I might never be soft and fluffy again. ---- derek |
