Writing and Thoughts...........
What would you do if there was a dark cloud following you around? It's an emotional thing. Or do I have an emotional disorder? Something's amiss, something's not right. It's like a chunk of me is dead and there's nothing but sadness left.

Quiet times are perhaps the most liveliest moments ever. Your brain hums silently thinking about everything. There are no distractions but you are aware of all your surroundings.
My thoughts change from time to time because right now I'll think I'll just die and no one will notice. It's not suicidal thinking just another observation of HAPPY LAND!

When the rain falls I think of someone above crying their eyes out. That's why rain depresses me so. Sometime the tears are of joy though! Which makes me happy. The weather just happens to follow my pattern of emotions.
Everywhere I turn, every corner I see gets slightly darker than the previous. Once I've ventured into that darkness it brightens up. This I know. What I don't know is if I have the courage. I know most things seem relativly easy in your lives, but in mine they just seem to be harder. There are advantages such as greater rewards but it's the disadvantages that scare me.

All I see around me is darkness and depression. Going forward going back, or just standing still. There are lights in my darkness but I can only choose one. Some shut me out, some ignore me. Only because they refuse to see the truth. They've all been turned the other way. Facing that fake happy world, it disgusts me. But I see the truth, the pitch black darkness everywhere, Life is never good because your just lying to yourself, you even know it's not real. I'm not crazy or insane just truthful to myself, or at least that's what I say. I couldn't handle that fake happiness that wasn't there. True happiness lies at the end of the darkness......
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