There are some women who see it as a personal goal to "Fix" or change gay men into straight men. They see Homosexuality as a choice, not an innate identity. These women are often simply looking for a challenge. It is not that they necessarily feel that homosexuality is wrong, yet that heterosexuality is a better choice. Converters are often very abrasive according to one gay man I interviewed. Michael Smith (Chicago) recounts several experiences of women trying to convince him that being straight would make them incredibly happy. That sex with women is much more fulfilling, especially if it is sex with them. Michael said that though he loves his fag hag friends (The ones focused soley on friendship) converters scare him. "They are too pushy. They can't understand that this is just the way I am!"
Converters stem from the social idea that homosexuality is a phase. That often gay men are merely experimenting and that they will eventually settle down with a nice girl. Their existance and tactics also make it clear that these women are being aggressive in trying to find relationships, yet are not comfortable persuing straight men. Gay men are more similar and easier to relate to then straight men as a whole. The aggressive qualities are similar to the idea of being "Proactive", or taking an active role in changing your life. It is the attitude that you have to go out and get what you want, even if it may be something out of reach. If a woman is trying to change someone to make their own lives better, it shows a problem with the ways in which that woman was taught to associate, and also demonstrates the problems that stem from a society riddled with phobias and stereotypes. |
