Angel's Christmas Carol
by Ben: The Vampire Hunter
b_church@yahoo.com
Feedback! Please!
Everyone here belongs to Joss Whedon. The concept however belongs to
Charles Dickens.
"Merry Christmas!"
"Yeah right."
"Gee could you sound less enthusiastic?"
"Yes. I could have ignored you."
"Whatever. Look it's Christmas Eve, you're my only friend really,
let's go do something. Have fun. Remember fun?"
"No."
"C'mon Angel! Don't be such a Scrooge!"
"I'm proud of you Cordelia. You made a literary reference."
"How is talking about a Disney charector a literary reference?"
"Never mind. No."
"Okay, remember that whole reaching out, and connecting thing?"
"Yes. I tried. And look what happened. A good man got killed."
"God you're hopeless. Fine. I'm going out to find living people
who do stuff at night. See ya."
......
"She's right you know."
"What, I'm hopeless...Doyle?"
"No, his evil twin brother, Elyod."
"Doyle, how can you be here? You're dead!"
"Yeah I noticed."
"Then how-"
"I've been sent. By the powers that be."
"This is starting to sound familiar."
"I should hope so. Look boyo, just becuase I bit it doesn't mean you
can diconnect from the world again."
"Doyle if I connect then I get people killed."
"And I didn't think it was possible to depress the dead."
"Look, if your here to take me on some kind of `It's a Wonderfull Life
Trip`-"
"You mean where I show you how horrible the world would be if you'd
never been born? Sorry Pal, not this time. I'm here to deliver a
message and then I got to go back. There's this great Christmas
Party I've been invited too. By Marilyn Monroe no less."
"Is the message not to mourn for you because you're having the time of
you afterlife?"
"Good message. But no. You will be haunted by three spirits-"
"Okay, I think I know the drill. Thanks."
*sigh* "You always knew how to spoil a good message. See ya around
Angel."
.......
"Hello Angel."
"Don't I know you?"
"I'm the Ghost of Christmas Past."
"No, you're the Annointed One."
"No. I was the Annointed One. Now, tonight, I'm the Ghost of
Christmas Past."
"Why you?"
"It used to be that there would be one ghost for everybody. But now
there has to be a new one for each person. One that's recognizable."
"But, I never really met you."
"Not to you, to the audience."
"What?"
"No time. C'mon."
"Right. Whatever."
...
"Do you recognize this place?"
"Yeah. Yeah I do. This was where I lived. How is this supposed to
motivate me? Look at me, I'm just sitting there drinking! That's all
I ever did!"
"Look closer."
"At what?! All I'm-that's my brother. I'm, I'm drinking with my
family. There's my cousin, my uncle. And my father."
"You drank a lot. So what? You're Irish."
"Other Irish people worked."
"You think you're the only one who never wanted to work? My older
brother didn't get a job until he was thirty."
"...But I killed them."
"That's beside the point."
....
"Oh lord."
"Never did hear of it snowing in Sunnydale before that night."
"It wasn't natural."
"Of course it wasn't. That's the point. Buffy needed you. The world
needed you. And it still does."
"But-"
"No buts. My time is up. The night wears on."
"That a little eloquent for a kid your age."
"Thank you."
"Hiya handsom."
"How'd YOU get this job?"
"We get progressively closer to you as we go. I, as you can no doubt
guess, am the Ghost of Christmas Present."
"How Ironic. Considering you gave me a `present` the night we first
met."
"That's the past. We're not here to discuss the past. We're here to
see what's happening in the here and now."
"Darla, I don't-"
"Doesn't matter. We're here."
"Why are we here?"
"To see how you SHOULD be spending tonight."
"Drinking?"
"No, being with your friend. Look at her. She's miserable!"
"She seems pretty perky to me."
"You always were a poor judge of people Angelus."
"Don't call me that."
"Touchy. C'mon."
"Oh them. Great way to get me to reach out. Show me how happy the
Scooby Gang is without me."
"God you really are pathetic. Willow's mother and father pay no
attention to her. Her one true love abandonded her, and believe me,
that's no picnic. Xander's parents view him as a burden, not a son.
Giles has no family. Likewise Anya. And Buffy's mom is out of town,
and her father can't come visit her. Plus, she's having serious guy
issues. And yet, they're still celebrating. Reaching out to each
other. Keeping themselves from going off the deep end."
"What about Spike?"
"He's a souless Vampire. He doesn't count."
"Right."
"So are you getting it? Reaching out doesn't hurt. It helps."
"But what about-hello?"
"She's gone me boyo."
"Oh God."
"Surreal isn't it. Like looking in a mirror, only not."
"Angelous you've hit a new low. Quoting John Woo movies?"
"Look at you. Whining twenty four seven. `Oh, I got my friend killed!
Boo Hoo!`. He sacrificed himself, the sucker. You had nothing to
do with it."
"Can we get on with this? Ghost of Christmas Future? Or better yet,
can I hit you?"
"Maybe later. I'm here to show you the future of the world. If you
never reach out that is. So here it is."
"What's-"
"Shh, wait for it."
....
"Was that Cordelia?"
"Was, yeah. Damn she makes a sexy Vampire!"
"What happened?"
"Well since I really hate spending time with you, I'll make this quick.
You stopped reaching out. That means less people got helped.
Somewhere down the line, Cordy went out, alone, and got sired. Then
she killed you. And L.A. quickly becomes a far less happy place to
be. There. I'm done."
"Good."
*POW*
"Man that felt good."
.........
"Cordelia."
"Angel?"
"Merry Christmas. Mind if I sit down?"
The End
(
geocities.com/area51/dimension) (
geocities.com/area51)