"We missed the scene!" Willow said to Xander as the director and her dogs bustled off.
"But we'll get to go to the screening, won't we, Giles?" Xander prompted the Watcher.
"Not if I can help it," Giles said. "Are they getting the high school back into some semblance of order? You did check?"
"Oh yeah!" Willow rallied bravely from her disappointment. "You wouldn't believe how fast these guys are at breaking everything down! They even have most of the smoke aired out of the student lounge. It still smells like a barbecue pit though. . ." She stopped to stare at Lena's crew, who were beginning to slap the red 'No Smoking' signs back on the walls. "Xander, where are those posting guidelines? The ones for the 'No Smoking' signs."
"Huh? Oh --" Xander slapped at his shirt pocket, then at his back pants pocket. He finally came up with a chocolate- smeared and folded-up wad of papers. "Damn. We still have to put up the rest of the signs."
"Not if we get these guys to do it for us." Willow carried the papers over to the head setman and handed them to him. He glanced through them, then motioned one of his crew over.
Debi wandered over, stumbling briefly over some trailing cables. "What a blast!" she said to Giles. "I can't wait to tell my friend Minerva that I'm in an actual movie! She'll be so jealous she'll spit! Even if I didn't get to do the smoochie scene."
"The last scene was a girly smoochie scene?" Xander said.
Debi nodded happily.
"Oh good, I don't feel so bad about missing it then. Hey that was our second film, Willow! I wonder when we all get to join the Screen Actors Gild?"
The film crew were pulling the last of the camera equipment out the back doors. One of them locked the doors and tossed Giles his keys. Several of the crew moved around the library walls, slapping 'No Smoking' signs up with engineering precision. Xander watched them for a moment, awe-struck. "These guys don't get paid by the hour, I'm guessing."
The last sign went up, and the crew went back to hauling equipment. Bookcases were moved and the big reading table was brought from its lurking place on the outside lawn.
"That's it then!" the set decorator yelled. He turned to Giles. "Anything else?"
Giles turned slowly around, somewhat stunned. It was as if his library had never sustained a major invasion -- except that now all the red 'No Smoking' signs were in place. "No," he finally managed.
"We could have used those guys in here after the Hellmouth broke loose," Xander said as the last of the crew left the library. "Hey Oz!"
Oz wandered through the doors, looking quizzically back at the departing crewman. "Guess I missed something then," he commented and set his guitar case on the table.
"You have no idea --!" Willow enthused.
Xander coughed, interrupting her impending story. "Not to kill your joy, Will, but isn't it Pepsi time? I've got a throat full of smoke right now."
"There's a definite eau de forest fire about the front entryway," Oz agreed. "I'm parked up front. There were all these vans in the student lot."
"Cordy?" Xander threw an arm around his girlfriend's waist. "You game? Cordy? Hello."
"What?" she looked at Xander, over at Giles, then back at Xander. "What are you saying?!"
Xander dropped his arm and inched away. "Bronze? Plans for tonight? Maybe from there a lusty drive up to Pinson's Point?"
"Oh sure. Whatever." She glanced at Giles, then looked back at Xander and smiled. "Play your cards right -- I might just be in a smoochie frame of mind."
Xander was grinning as the four of them trooped out of the library.
"Well!" Debi said to Giles as she looked around the library. "Gee! It's the two of us left alone here! Imagine that."
Giles grabbed her arms and marched her to the doors. "And I'm locking up now, before anybody tries to impose on me further." He moved her out into the hall, turned off the library lights, and shut and locked the doors. "Secure now. Yes! Finally!" He slumped against the doors and sighed.
Debi leaned against the doors next to him. "What a night, huh?" She searched about her person. "Dang. Can I bum a cigarette?"
Giles pulled three packs from his jacket pocket and offered them to her.
"Smorgasbord!" Debi picked out the pack that Rory had given Giles and pulled a cigarette out. "These are the strangest looking things. What's this language on the pack here?"
"German," said Giles, and offered her a light.
"I always wanted to learn a foreign language. I took half a year of French in high school, but there were so many weird ways to say the simplest things. Do you know that the French give sexes to everything?" She drew a breath off the cigarette and coughed. "Wow, these things pack a kick." She held the smoking cigarette up before his nose. "This looks male to me, doesn't it look male to you? But damn if the French didn't go and make it a girl."
"Actually . . ." Giles said, looking at the cigarette longingly.
"And what do we have here, pray tell?"
Debi and Giles turned towards the bearer of the sickeningly familiar voice.
Principal Snyder stood in the hallway from the direction of the back entrances. He was glowering at them. "Do you people have any idea what time it is? Or have you been so busy fraternizing in the halls that you lost track of the time? And Ms. Marble -- what a surprise to catch you breaking the rules. Again. Seems there was something in your employment contact about following them."
"Secretary's privilege." Debi tapped the ash off her cigarette onto the floor. "You don't tell the school board about this, I don't tell them about what I found in the bottom drawer of your file cabinet last week."
Snyder looked outraged. "That drawer was locked!"
"And you gave me a whole bunch of student records to edit over one afternoon and no Wite-Out," Debi retorted. "And then you left for yet another god-knows-how-long martini lunch with the Mayor. If you're going to be stingy about supplies and nasty about deadlines, then you can just expect me to use the resources I have. Like my nail file to unlock the file drawer."
"Did you get the Wite-Out?" Giles said with interest.
Debi nodded.
"Seems like the moral of the story might be not to file incriminating evidence in with the office supplies," Giles told Snyder.
Snyder's upper lip curled, but he pointedly ignored the librarian. "One of these days, Miss, you're going to pay for your impertinences. Good jobs aren't that easy to come across in this town if you've got an Official Black Mark on your record."
Debi rolled her eyes. "Better get somebody really good from the temp agency then. Nobody files like I do."
"And as for you," Snyder finally turned his ire on Giles. "You're supposed to be supervising the building tonight, and that means making sure the 'No Smoking' signs are enforced."
"Oh bugger off," Giles told him.
Snyder's eyes popped.
"We're leaving now," Debi said hastily, and slipped a hand under Giles' arm.
Snyder's look of shock was replaced by one of anger. "Not so fast! Somebody has to stay in the building until Mr. Riley comes back to lock up."
"You're here anyways," Debi argued.
"I am busy," Snyder snapped at her. "Mr. Giles was given the job, and he will do as he's told, for once."
"Sod this." Giles grabbed Snyder by the back of the jacket and propelled him down the hall.
"What are you doing?" Snyder yelled. "The school board --"
"Will bloody well have nothing to say about it, since they'll be too busy looking at a certain high school principal with a file cabinet drawer up his arse," Giles growled.
Debi trotted up the hall ahead of them and hauled open the utility closet door. Giles pitched the outraged principal inside, and they slammed the door shut on him. Debi fumbled a key from her skirt pocket and locked the door.
"Let me out this minute!" Snyder yelled and rattled the doors.
"Like having a feral rat trapped," Giles panted. "What do we do now?"
Debi checked her watch. "Joe will be here to lock up in an hour. Herr Snyder can chill until then." She took another puff on her cigarette and started to giggle. "Kind of caps the night, doesn't it?"
He couldn't help it -- he suddenly had to laugh. "Oh lord," he gasped, wiping the tears from his eyes. "I was going to kill Ethan for that Band Candy trick. Now I think I'll torture him before I kill him."
Debi smiled at him in a confused fashion. Giles studied her for a moment, then moved to gently brush his lips against hers. Her eyes shut and she sighed.
The taste of tobacco again. He drew away and murmured to her, "Just one cigarette. After the night I've had --"
"You deserve it," Debi agreed. She passed him hers.
He brought the cigarette to his mouth.
"Giles! What do you think you're doing?!"
He turned to confront an outraged Buffy coming down the front hallway, Faith following close behind her.
"Buffy. Where have you been?" he demanded.
"Out doing my job." Buffy strode up and grabbed the cigarette from his hand. "You promised me you wouldn't ever smoke again, Giles. Just yesterday you promised." She ground the cigarette out under foot.
"Hey B, what's the big?" Faith came up from behind. "It's one lousy cigarette. Let the man live a little." She winked at Debi.
"The 'big' is that he broke his promise!" Buffy yelled.
"Since when do you own him?" Debi said indignantly.
Buffy glared at her. "What business is it of yours, I'd like to know?"
Debi sighed and moved over to unlock the utility closet door. She looked at Giles and raised an eyebrow. He hesitated then nodded. "Buffy, I'm sorry I disappointed you. And I apologize for the rest of this too."
Buffy crossed her arms over her chest. "What?!"
Debi opened the utility closet door. Giles pushed a startled Buffy back into Snyder's arms and slammed the door shut again on the two of them. Debi turned the lock.
"She'll just kick the door down again," said an amused Faith.
"Hopefully not, since Snyder is in there with her. Destruction of school property and all that," grunted Giles.
"It'll do 'em both good," Debi added. "They can have a heart to heart while they wait for Joe to let them out."
"Giles!" The door rattled violently. "Come on Giles! This isn't funny!"
"Mr. Giles, Ms. Marble, I demand you unlock this door immediately!"
"Well, guess I'll head back to the Bronze again, unless you guys need me for anything," Faith said. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do, 'kay?"
"Let's see," Giles said as the Second Slayer walked off. "What wouldn't Faith do?"
"Well, she does seem a little young legal-wise for margaritas," Debi said wistfully. "Course that didn't stop me, when I was her age."
Giles smiled at her. "Margaritas it is then."
"Cool! Can we go in your car?" Debi handed him a new cigarette, and they turned their backs on the rattling utility closet door to stroll down the hall together. "I've noticed it in the lot. I love those old imports. I should have known better before. Anybody who drives such a cool car can't really be a geek."
END (Or Is It?)