The Cybernautic Bat

One week later, deep within a secret facility hidden somewhere in a Middle Eastern desert, a handsome, 25-year old guard fought to stay awake. His duty had become extremely boring ever since the American company had taken over. No one ever came down here anymore.

Once again, the guard opened his grey eyes wide. He was seated at a desk at the end of a long corridor, adjacent to a door secured by an electronic lock. Long, black, straight hair almost reached to the guard's thin eyebrows. His dark complexion showed the strain of hours of inactivity. That, however, was about to change . . .

At the sound of footsteps approaching, the guard snapped to attention. A strange pair of men came towards him. One he recognized as the head of the company's public relations department. Short and in his mid-fifties, he was nattily dressed in a business suit.

Accompanying the guard's countryman was a stranger, whom the guard immediately guessed was an American. Not only was he tall, slightly overweight and relatively pale, he wore a cowboy hat on his head.

<"May I help you?"> the young man asked in Arabic.

<"Mr. Ewing would like to inspect the Containment Room,"> the P.R. man replied.

<"I'm sorry, sir,"> the guard explained. <"No one may enter without authorization.">

The balding man explained to the American. "Uh, huh," grunted J. R. Ewing. "Translate for me, will you?

"Listen, son, you know the company that you used to work for has been purchased by Ewing Oil, don't you?" After the translation, the man behind the desk nodded his assent. "Well, who do you think owns Ewing Oil? So, whose authorization do you think I need?"

The guard was forced to admit the logic of the situation. He didn't object when the American went to the key pad and entered the code. The door hissed open. The guard was surprised, however, when Mr. Ewing entered the room by himself, closing the door after him, leaving the department head and the guard behind.

J. R. made his way through several airlocks before he reached his destination. Ewing couldn't read Arabic, but the various biological containment boxes were also labeled in English. It didn't take him long to find the one for which he was looking. There it was: The Cassiopeia Strain.

The Texan carefully opened the box. Seven test tubes were securely nestled within thick foam padding. J. R. took the one farthest to the right and placed it in a small box he had been carrying inside his jacket.

Two days later, a throng was gathered at the Gotham City Holiday Inn. A weekend convention was underway in honor of the television series created by Sid and Marty Krofft, H. R. Pufnstuf. Fans of the show flocked to see exhibits about Pufnstuf, as well as to visit the dealer's room.

Much of the excitement, however, was focused on two new series under development. One, called Bugaloos, was set to debut in the fall. One of the proposed stars of the other was just about to be introduced to a packed banquet room.

Sid Krofft walked up to the podium to wild applause. "Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, it gives me great pleasure to introduce one of the stars of our newest show, Liddsville, Mr. Charles Nelson Reilly!"

The actor strode on stage from the right to a thunderous ovation. Krofft and Reilly were about to shake hands, when suddenly a third figure emerged from the opposite wing.

"How dare you make a show about hyats without consulting me!!" The Mad Hatter shouted. As Krofft turned to look at the intruder, Tetch squeezed the bulb with his right, white-gloved hand which activated his Super Instant Mesmerizer. The lid of the Hatter's top hat popped open, revealing two red "eyes" shining from within the darkness. Hypnotic beams struck out at the television producer, rendering him unconscious.

Alice, who had been seated in the front row, jumped onto the stage. She pulled out her gun and pushed it against the actor's back.

"Come with us, Mr. Reilly!" ordered The Mad Hatter.

"There'll be no hostage taking today, Jervis Tetch!" the authoritative tones of Batman boomed out. He and Robin emerged from stage right. "We knew you couldn't resist this target."

"Feeling better, eh, Byatman?" asked The Hatter with mock sincerity. "Well, stand aside, or Mr. Reilly will be feeling a good deal worse!"

"I don't think so, Tetch," Batman responded, as he and Robin slowly advanced on Alice and the actor. "We saw your little hellion sitting in the front row and burned out the firing pin on her weapon with our Bat-laser!"

The audience, which had turned to flee at the appearance of The Mad Hatter, retook their seats at the arrival of the Dynamic Duo. Deafening clapping and whistles marked the entrance of Batgirl from behind the curtain at center stage. She was only few steps from the location of Alice and her captive.

"You're outnumbered now, Hatter," Batman observed. "You and your young friend might as well give yourselves up."

"Outnumbered, are we, Byatman? We'll see about thyat!"

Batman and Robin half expected derby-hatted henchmen to rush the stage. None, however, appeared. Batgirl seemed to be standing strangely at attention, but Batman was focused on Alice and The Mad Hatter. Just as Batman and Robin reached their ally . . .

KICK!

Batgirl sent Batman flying with one of her patented chorus-line kicks!

Batgirl had reached the same conclusion as the Dynamic Duo when she heard about the Krofft's new show. She had been waiting patiently backstage, when she saw Batman and Robin arrive. At that point, Batgirl had intended to join them at their side, but discovered all of a sudden that she could not move! She had lost all control over her body!! Some unseen force had caused the Caped Crimefightress to step out from behind the curtain, as if on cue, and then to deliver the boot to Batman's head!

Batgirl was fully aware of what she was doing, but she was absolutely helpless to stop herself. Batgirl had no more control over her actions than she did over the production of bile in her liver. She was like a puppet on a string. There was no question of the Dominoed Daredoll trying to resist. Her willpower wasn't being overcome, it was being circumvented.

"Batman!" Robin cried. "Batgirl! What are you doing?!?" Just then, the hum of the Super Instant Mesmerizer was once again heard. Both Batman and the Boy Wonder had held Antimesmerizing Batreflectors in their hands as a counter-measure to The Mad Hatter's weapon of choice, but Robin had dropped his guard in his astonished reaction to Batgirl's sneak attack on his mentor. The hypnotic rays made their way unimpeded into the Teenage Thunderbolt's eyes. Robin slumped to the stage floor.

Batgirl immediately followed up on her advantage over the Masked Manhunter. Batman received another kick to the face, preventing him from scrambling to his feet. Then Batgirl slid to the floor. Assuming a position at a right angle to Batman, she clamped her muscular thighs around the hero's neck!

Batgirl slipped the heel of one purple boot over her opposite ankle and braced her feet against each other as she increased the pressure around Batman's throat. Words not her own came out of Batgirl's mouth, "The more you struggle, the tighter it'll get. I only want to knock you out, but if you fight it too much, I'll break your neck!"

The purple-clad warrior woman was astonished to hear her own voice speak. She had no idea she was going to talk. The speech came out of nowhere. Most surprising, the lines were not delivered in a monotone, but with a passion she did not share. As odd as it was to have her body controlled, she found it most disconcerting to have no input into what she said.

There was little question of Batman struggling for long. Under the vicious scissors hold of Batgirl's magnificently muscled legs, Batman's windpipe was squeezed shut. Colors swirled in front of the Caped Crusader's eyes. Even his fantastic strength was insufficient to pry Batgirl's thighs off his neck. His body was denied life-giving oxygen. Within moments, Batman joined Robin, as the Dark Knight lapsed into unconsciousness.

The crowd had watched in horrified fascination as Batgirl had taken down Batman. Now, realizing that the Bat Beauty was somehow under the control of The Mad Hatter, they once again made a panicked rush for the exits.

Batgirl, her awful assignment accomplished, rose to her feet to stand over the supine Caped Crusader. Now her face was an absolute blank, betraying not a hint of emotion.

"Batgirl, what have you done?" Reilly asked in shock. Batgirl stood mute. The actor turned to Jervis Tetch, who was now standing over the passed-out crimefighters. "You're behind this! but how? How are you controlling Batgirl?"

The Mad Hatter regarded the actor coldly. "Byatgirl has lost her will. She will continue to breathe and blink and swallow, just as if she was asleep, but all her voluntary actions are now controlled from under my hyat."

The Mad Hatter paused, basking in his triumph. "But, Mr. Reilly, you may go. You've served your purpose. You were only bait for my Byat-Trap."

Reilly hated to just run away, but he had no real choice. Not only was he no match for Batgirl, but The Hatter had handed the girl, Alice, another gun. The actor scurried from the stage, determined to contact the police as soon as he could.

"Well, Alice, my dear," began Tetch, "if you will grab the Boy Wonder's green booties, I'll get a hold of him under his shoulders and we can convey him to the Flying Hyat. I'll have Byatgirl bring The Byatman."

Batgirl raged inside her mind. She had been placed in a wide variety of frustrating positions by an unending parade of baddies, but never, ever, had she felt as completely thwarted as she did at this very minute. Without any input from her brain whatsoever, she bent down and picked up Batman in a fireman's carry. Batgirl followed after Tetch and Alice like a devoted puppy.

Batman awoke to find himself in some sort of clear, plastic prison, with Robin laying at his side. Their utility belts were, of course, gone. The rectangular cell was comfortably large and was set in one corner of a much larger room. As he explored their confines, he found a water cooler with several spare bottles of water, a well-stocked pantry, refrigerator, television, radio, two beds and a campers' toilet.

The World's Greatest Detective examined their transparent cage itself. At one spot on the outside of a wall, there appeared what Batman guessed to be the back of a control panel on what looked like a door mechanism. Inside the cell, at the far end of the "door", was a red button. Batman decided not to risk pushing it . . . yet.

In the outer room, The Mad Hatter and his young ally were nowhere to be seen. Against a wall, however, J. R. Ewing sat motionless on a folding chair. He stared straight ahead, his cowboy hat perched firmly on his head. Batgirl stood next to him, also seemingly looking out through unseeing eyes . . .

but Batgirl could see and experience everything going on around her. ‘This is the most terrible Bat-Trap I've been put in yet!' she thought. ‘If Batman and Robin can't escape, how long does The Hatter intend to keep me like this? Indefinitely?'

Meanwhile, inside the cell, Robin stirred. He rubbed his head with his right green glove as he straggled to his feet. "Holy Zombie! What's The Mad Hatter done to Batgirl?"

"Put her under some sort of mind, or at least body, control, Robin. What we've got to do for the moment is ignore her and hope we can use her to our advantage later."

The Boy Wonder looked up at his mentor. "I see you still have your cowl."

"I noticed," Batman replied slowly, "and that's what worries me . . ."

Before Batman could finish the thought, The Mad Hatter and his accomplice entered through a door at the far end of the room. Tetch walked up to stand directly facing Batman, while Alice went over to playfully wave her hands in front of Batgirl's eyes.

"What's the meaning of this, Hatter?" Batman demanded.

"The ultimate crime against humanity, Byatman," Tetch beamed. "Tell me, Caped Crusader, have you ever heard of The Cassiopeia Strain?"

Batman was a hard person to surprise, but The Mad Hatter had done it. Some of the color drained from what could be seen of Batman's face. ‘Now this all fits together!' he thought. He said, "You devil!" The Hatter smiled maddeningly back through the transparent prison at him.

"What is it, Batman?" asked Robin, who, upon observing his partner's reaction, became even more concerned than before.

For the moment, Batman ignored his sidekick. "What do you want, Tetch?"

"Why, nothing, Byatman," said The Hatter, turning and walking away with a grin. "Nothing at all."

Batman swung towards his youthful aide, his face grim. "The Cassiopeia Strain is a biological weapon developed in the Middle East. Reportedly, it is so virulent that if a single test tube of it was released, it would kill every human being on Earth in a matter of days!"

"Holy Doomsday Machine!"

Jervis Tetch had opened a cabinet along the far wall. Inside he found a briefcase, which he removed and set upon a table. The case had a combination lock, which he opened. The Mad Hatter then reached in and removed one glass test tube.

Holding the vial in a white-gloved hand, the villain walked back to face the Dynamic Duo. "Here it is, Caped Crimefighters. Personally delivered by Mr. Ewing: The Cassiopeia Strain . . . and in a few moments, I will smash it against the floor."

"WHAT!" Batman and Robin exclaimed in unison. "You're mad!" Batman declared.

"That is my eponym," Tetch declared triumphantly.

"Why?" Robin croaked.

"Boy Wonder, at your age I don't expect you to understand, but I'm 57-years old. I can't bear the thought of the world continuing after I die." Tetch stared at the tube of death in his hand, transfixed. "So, I'm going to take everybody with me when I go . . ."

"What about your young friend?" Batman pleaded. "Doesn't she deserve to live?"

"What does she have to look forward to, Byatman?" Tetch snapped. "A life behind bars or in an endless succession of mental institutions? No, far better for her to die now and bring her suffering to an end." Alice smiled at her Hatter. "I know what it's like to be locked up . . . and now, so shall you!"

"What do you mean?" Robin asked.

"I've designed a particularly exquisite revenge upon you and Byatman," The Mad Hatter explained. "While the rest of the world dies, the two of you will be perfectly safe in thyat air-tight room I've provided. The lights and other various electrical devices are powered by rechargeable batteries hooked up to solar cells. You can watch and listen to the end of the world on TV and radio!

"In about 24 hours that door, although it will remained tightly shut, will automatically unlock. All you have to do to get out is push the red button. I suggest, though, that you wait at least two weeks before your emerge. That's how long the scientists estimate it will take for The Cassiopeia Strain to burn itself out . . . unless, of course, you decide to commit suicide."

Robin, furious, held his clenched fists at his side as he listened to Tetch's mad scheme. The normally unflappable Batman was shocked at the scope of The Hatter's villainy. Batgirl's thoughts leapt to her father. He, along with her and everyone else, would be killed unless she could somehow overcome the effect of Tetch's mind control.

The Dominoed Daredoll, however, had no idea how to break free. She was as powerless as a statue. In fact, at that moment, Alice was amusing herself rummaging through the various compartments of Batgirl's utility belt.

"Who knows, Byatman," the high-hatted maniac concluded, "perhaps you will find some woman who survives the holocaust, either through an unexpected immunity or chance isolation. Maybe she will be the Eve to your Adam . . .

"Well, I see no reason to prolong this!" Tetch shouted as he raised his arm with the test tube in his hand.

"NO!" Robin shouted.

CRASH!

Batwoman and Flamebird broke through the front door, a vision of lively loveliness in yellow and black, and maroon and gold! They stood, hands on hips next to each other, facing The Mad Hatter.

"I don't know what your game is, Hatter," Batwoman proclaimed, "but it's over."

"Watch it, Batwoman!" Batman yelled. "That test tube is full of a deadly biological agent!"

"Egad!" said Tetch, shocked by the arrival of Gotham's newest crimefighters. "I've got even more byats in my belfry! How did you find my Chapeau Chateau?"

"Simple," Batwoman replied. "That Flying Hat of yours generates a lot of heat. Its engines take quite a while to cool down. We hacked into the telemetry from a Russian spy satellite with infra-red capability and tracked it down."

The Mad Hatter was completely distracted from the destruction he was about to wreak upon the world. Instead, he told Alice, "Cover the girl in the goggles, while I stage a byattle of the female byats!"

Batwoman noticed Batgirl striding towards her. She had thought it odd that Batgirl had just been standing there, but decided she was under the influence of some sort of paralyzing gas. Now, the black-booted beauty, confused, said, "Batgirl?"

"Look out, Batwoman!" Batman shouted. "Hatter's got Batgirl under some kind of spell!"

The warning came just in time, as Batgirl launched a savage kick at Batwoman's head. The slightly older, but much less experienced crimefightress, was barely able to duck out of the way.

Batgirl swung a purple arm back at Kathy's face. Batwoman's black gloved forearm blocked the blow, but she knew she would soon have nasty bruise at the point of impact.

"Batgirl! Snap out of it!" Batwoman implored.

"I've hated you since the first time I saw you," Batgirl spat out. This rejoinder hit closer to home for Barbara than anything else The Mad Hatter had made her do. Although she didn't really hate this woman, Babs' thoughts about Batwoman when Batgirl had been turned into Catwoman had caused Barbara to re-examine her feelings about this newest Gotham City heroine.

She was forced to admit to herself that she did harbor a little resentment towards this intruder into her relationship with Batman and Robin. Intellectually, Barbara welcomed any help in the fight against crime, but on another level she had enjoyed being the Dynamic Duo's only costumed female ally. Now, she was one of three . . .

Whether this played any part in her attack on Batwoman was dubious, but there was a relentlessness to Batgirl's fighting that was heretofore unseen. Batwoman, restrained in part by her hesitancy to hurt Batgirl, was beginning to whither under the barrage.

Flamebird moved to help her partner. "Uh, uh, dearie," Alice chided, pointing her pistol directly at the youngster's green and gold V-plunged neckline. "It is bad form to interfere with other women when they are playing." Alice wisely remained far enough away from the Wonder Girl to prevent Flamebird from disarming the psychotic teenager.

Although Batgirl's reflexes were slightly slower than normal due to Tetch's mind control, Batwoman was about to lose the fight. A small trickle of blood started to run from Batwoman's mouth. A chorus-line kick caught her full in the belly, knocking the wind from her.

Alice piped up, "Oh, Mr. Hatter, sir: When Batgirl knocks this woman out, do please attach one of the devices to her. Then we can watch Batgirl and Batwoman fight to the death!"

"Splendid idea!" replied Tetch. "We can stage our own version of Rock ‘em/Sock ‘em Robots!"

"You indecent monster!" Robin growled, helpless behind the plastic wall.

Batwoman thought furiously. ‘Under these circumstances, I'm no match for Batgirl . . . but wait! Who's that man just sitting there? He doesn't appear to be one of The Hatter's henchmen . . . Why, it's J. R. Ewing! He must be under The Mad Hatter's spell, too.'

Batwoman blocked a kick and a right, but a left from Batgirl caught her on the chin. Kathy was now on her last legs. ‘How is The Hatter controlling these people? That's it! From his sobriquet, it's obvious! He must be directing them through their hats! Now, if I can just maneuver into position, without being too obvious . . .'

The light glistened off Batwoman's pantyhose as she moved between Batgirl and the seated Mr. Ewing. Kathy made little effort to get out of the way as Batgirl lashed at her once again with a high kick. Timing it perfectly, Batwoman launched herself backwards away from the blow and crashed into J. R., knocking off his hat.

"Mr. Ewing!" Batman shouted while indicating the outside control panel. "Hit this button!"

Although J. R. had seemed oblivious, he had been following events closely. He sprang to his feet and, before The Mad Hatter could react, hit the opening mechanism.

Whoosh! The hermetically sealed door slid open and the Dynamic Duo raced through.

Tetch raged, "It's no good, Byatman! I'm going to smash the vial . . . now!"

"Here, Hatter! Catch!" Batman whipped off his cowl and threw it to Tetch, and then, in the same motion, covered his face with his cape.

The Mad Hatter was so surprised and delighted to finally have his long-sought after prize handed to him, that he forgot all about the test tube. He carelessly let it drop from his hand.

"Robin! Grab it!" Batman's muffled voice ordered from underneath his cape.

Flamebird ignored the threat of Alice's gun and dove for the falling object, as did Robin. The male and female teens looked like two runners sliding head-first into the same base as they cushioned the test tube in green and red gloved hands! For the time being, humanity was saved!!

Alice let the gun drop to the floor, as she went over to Jervis Tetch. The Mad Hatter was hugging Batman's cowl up to his cheek. Tears streamed down his face. "Oh, Mr. Hatter, sir. Are you finally happy?"

"Oh, yes, my dear," he sobbed with joy. "I've finally got what I've wanted my entire life. The most valuable hyat in the world!"

This wave of intense emotion broke the psychic/mechanical link between The Mad Hatter's mind and Batgirl. Batgirl went over to Batwoman, who was still sitting on the floor, recuperating from her bout with Batgirl. "I want to apologize for what I did-"

"Don't worry about it, Batgirl," Batwoman answered. "It wasn't your fault . . . and I'm sure you want to get that device out of your cowl as soon as possible."

"Yes," said Batgirl, touching her cowl with her right gloved hand.

Batwoman continued, "but I'd still like to talk to you at length sometime . . . privately."

Robin and Flamebird put The Cassiopeia Strain back in its case. The Boy Wonder was engaged in small-talk with his female counterpart, when he realized that Batman was still standing there, with the Dark Knight's cape concealing Bruce Wayne's face!

Robin called the Gotham State Police on his utility belt radio. Soon they arrived to collect The Mad Hatter and Alice, as well as to give the Dynamic Duo and Batgirl a ride back to the Holiday Inn. Batman showed The Hatter a kindness that surely would not have been reciprocated. He allowed Tetch to keep his cowl. Robin drove Batman in the Batmobile back to the Batcave.

The Mad Hatter was returned to the Gotham State Penitentiary. Alice was sent back to the juvenile detention facility. The test tube of The Cassiopeia Strain was destroyed, as were all the remaining samples under the control of Ewing Oil. All seemed right with the world again, until . . .

Three nights later, in the evidence room at Gotham City Police Headquarters . . .

"Farsighted of the boss to make copies of all the keys when she was in charge," said a young blonde woman. No lights were on in the room. Flashlights held by two other women were the only illumination, as the speaker and two more carted a device that looked like a hair dryer to the door.

"That's the boss," replied another. "She thinks of everything."

About an hour later, in a back office of a warehouse, an older woman was seated behind a desk, her face obscured by shadows. The blonde woman entered the room and spoke:

"We got the package, boss. No problem at all."

"Excellent! Now we can proceed with Operation Delete Y Chromosomes . . .

and with the ultimate defeat of Batgirl!"

The older woman leaned forward. The light from the overhead lamp revealed the face of . . .

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