{The camera opens on Rich Greenspear & Sam Richards, who are
sitting in a McDonalds. Sam is eating a Big Mac & Apple Pie. Rich
is chowing down on a 20 piece McNugget meal. The camera pans in
on them as if the camera was walking towards them. Chad Duncan
walks into view.}
[Chad Duncan]
Rich, Sam...
[Sam Richards]
Howdy!
[Rich Greenspear]
Gutentag!
[Chad]
Gentlemen, might we have a few words with you?
[Sam]
Sure. Have a seat.
[Chad]
I guess the thing that's been on the mind of most of the fans and
wrestlers in AWI has been: Where have you two been?
[Sam]
Well, Rich's mother's been sick, so we decided to take a little
time off so Rich could be with her.
[Rich]
She's OK now.
[Chad]
Glad to hear that, Rich. Your reappearance at Union II came as
quite a surprise to many. Did you plan on being involved in
Union II?
[Sam]
We were asked by Danny Boy McGill to watch his back during his
World Title defense, so in that incident, we did plan on being
involved. We decided to get involved in the Boot Hill match
after Megaton decided to stick their fat heads in where they
didn't belong. They had no business there at all.
[Rich]
Megaton never learns, but they vill in time.
[Sam]
We have no desire to keep Intensive Care as the champs, but what
Megaton was doing might have prevented Boot Hill from having a
fair shot at winning the match.
[Rich]
Hey, I-C ... you keep on walking around vith those belts. You
just remember the team you've never beaten, and ve'll remember
the team we've never lost to.
[Chad]
What is your current relationship with Robbie Stevens?
[Rich]
I'd like to break his scrawny little neck.
[Sam]
{frown forming on his face} He'll get his. We're already
planning the inevitable beating that's coming to him. Next
question, if you don't mind.
[Chad]
Uh ... I'm sorry if I ...
[Sam]
It's OK. Robbie just pis-- I mean, makes me really angry.
[Chad]
I can relate with you on that ... who are you looking forward to
being your next opponents?
[Sam]
The next person who signs the contract. We'd love to have
Perfection, who we believe to be bad representatives of the North
American titles, but let's just say we won't hold our breath.
They don't seem the types to enjoy defending their titles. I
personally would like to take on Boot Hill ... I think that would
be a great match.
[Rich]
Of course, if I-C signs a match vith us, ve'd love to have a shot
at the Tag titles.
[Chad]
Well gentlemen, thanks for giving us some of your time. I'll let
you two get back to your lunch.
[Sam]
No prob. Hey, want some fries?
[Chad]
Thanks. This is Chad Duncan, on location with the Honor Guard,
signing off.
{Fade out as Chad eats a french fry ...}
=================================================================
{... into a close-up on a wrestling ring in an empty arena ... in
the ring is what looks like some sort of bomb ... the camera
slowly fades into the bomb, and we see a timer on it. It counts
down, alternating with images of wrestling action.}
10: "Devastating" Dan Lea with the "Devastator" on "War
Machine" Greg Gardner
09: Jack Fury with the "Jack Hammer" on "The Olympian"
Gary White
08: Jimmy Springheel with a European uppercut on Steve the
Insane
07: Melissa Wright with the Bankbreaker on Dacia Blackthorne
06: Perfection with the New Perfect Finisher on The Warbirds
05: Carlos Mendoza with the "Heart to Heart Suplex" on
Destruction
04: The Fallen Angel with a double flying body press on Dream
Succubus
03: "Bulldog" Bryan Bachman with his hands raised in victory
and the TV Title draped over one shoulder
02: Ken Mischief destroying Big Mike Farrell with "Big Trouble"
01: A sublimely contemptuous John Robertson clutching his World
Title ...
The bomb hits 00, and explodes, the shrapnel forming into the
logo ...
=================================================================
A W W IIIII
A A W W I
AAAAA W W W I
A A WW WW I
A A W W IIIII
EEEEE X X PPPP L OOO SSSS IIIII OOO N N
E X X P P L O O S I O O NN N
EEE X PPPP L O O SSS I O O N N N
E X X P L O O S I O O N NN
EEEEE X X P LLLLL OOO SSSS IIIII OOO N N
=================================================================
{The camera pans across the AWI Explosion studio, in its
talkshow-like configuration, none the worse for wear for its
several-month layoff ... sitting behind the desk, brown hair
actually in place for once, is Paul Stone, while perched in one
of the chairs is a sparkled-eyed lady with long auburn hair,
dressed in a sharp-looking business suit -- longtime AWE/AWI
viewers would recognize her.)
[Paul Stone]
Hey, everybody, welcome to another edition of AWI Explosion!
With me this morning is none other than ... well, somebody a LOT
better looking than Michael Helics ...
[Trinity Saunders]
Why, thank you, Paul ...
[Stone]
Yep. Trinity Saunders is once again in the AWI broadcasting
booth ... or couch, as it were.
[Saunders]
{waving to the camera} Missed me?
[Stone]
Well, it's not just a great show we have today, it's a BUSY one!
I've seen freeway pileups that didn't have this much excitement
-- or as many bodies on the ground.
[Saunders]
You said it, Paul ... we're going to see a VERY interesting
Courtroom, with some shocking developments -- not to mention
ramifications for our main event, wherein the "Billion-Dollar
Babe" Melissa Wright gets her shot at the Fallen Angel's Women's
Title.
[Stone]
Say, if Melissa's the Billion-Dollar Babe, how much are you?
[Saunders]
I don't know, Paul -- this all came free with birth.
[Stone]
Ow -- cue rimshot.
[Saunders]
Sorry ...
[Stone]
Leave comedy to the professionals, OK? And speaking of
professionals, we'll have two of the hottest professionals in
the sport today trying to keep their lucky streaks alive, as Ken
Mischief takes on the high-flying Mist Angel, and the Crystal
Crow faces the Canadian Sensation, Chris Sim.
[Saunders]
I don't think you can call either Crow or Mischief's success
"lucky," Paul. The Crow has the Jade Tiger on his side, after
all, and Mischief's shown he has talent.
[Stone]
Well, before we get to those exciting events, we have comments
and action from one of the more /unlucky/ superstars in the AWI
... "El Scorpion," Carlos Mendoza!
[Saunders]
{dreamy look} Paul, a man like Carlos doesn't NEED luck ...
[Stone]
Hooboy -- here we go again ...
=================================================================
{Whistling can be heard and the sound of footsteps echoing down a
darkened hallway. The camera pans to the end of the hallway where
a figure can be seen making his way towards the crew. As the
figure passes beneath one of the few lights in the hallway, it
can clearly seen that it is none other than "El Scorpion" Carlos
Mendoza. Carlos is wearing black jeans, a white shirt with a
banded collar, and a three quarter length black leather jacket.
He has a garment bag slung over one shoulder and his "AWI" duffel
bag in the other hand.}
[Carlos Mendoza]
HEYYY! Happy Brand New Year! YES! I hope every one has had a most
wonderful Christmas and New Year like the one I have enjoyed!
WOW! All the presents, the family, the friends, the food, and
last but not least ... ME!
{Carlos reaches his dressing room door, unlocks it, and proceeds
to go in.}
[Mendoza]
Santonio will be along in a few more days. He still has some
family matters to tend to, but not to worry. He is fine! Anyway.
I hope everyone made a new resolution for the year, eh? I know I
made quite a few myself. Although only two of them may come true.
Hey, can't blame a fellow for being realistic.
{Carlos cuts on his monitor and proceeds to put his clothes into
the closet and notices the camera is still in the room.}
[Mendoza]
Oh, let me guess. You want to know what they are right? I don't
know. I thought that if you told your resolutions they wouldn't
come true.
{Carlos pauses for a moment, looks up at the ceiling as if
thinking before he continues.}
[Mendoza]
Ahhhhhhh ... okay, you twisted my arm. My first resolution
concerns an old friend of mine, Mr. Tzskova no doubt, yes. Well,
first off let me welcome you back to the AWI from under your
rock, you snake. Don't think I forgot the time you cost me with
that leg injury. Not a way I'd like to remember my rookie season
in the AWI. No matter, we'll settle it later, I promise.
{Carlos sits down in his chair and starts taking off his shoes
preparing for his upcoming match.}
[Mendoza]
Whew! I think I'd better get some of those odor eaters for my
shoes, eh? Just playing. My feet don't stink.
{Carlos quickly hops over to his bed and lifts up the mattress
and then puts it back down smiling}
[Mendoza]
Had to check! Where was I? Ah yes! The second resolution has to
do with one Kenny Mischief. Happy New Year, Kenny Boy! {Carlos
takes a bow} Kenny, you don't think I forgot about the promise I
made to you? No no nonononono. I will definitely start your new
year off with a *bang*, Kenny Boy. I know we should start the new
year off with no hard feelings, but it's wrestling we can't help
it. Oh well. If you'll excuse me, I have to finish changing
sooooo ... you can go now. I'll see you out there in the squared
circle. Adios!
{As the camera pans backwards from the room you here Carlos
muttering to himself, "Aye, who am I supposed to be wrestling
tonight. Where did that card go. Carumba! What a way to start
off the new year!"}
=================================================================
{As the camera wipes in to ringside, the voices of Justin
Escobar, Michael Helics, and Paul Stone can be heard.}
[Justin Escobar]
And Mendoza now ready to face off against Robert Riley ... Riley
not taking ANY chances, as he rushes Mendoza to start, staggering
El Scorpion into the corner ... and lets loose with a flurry of
punches from the second rope ... 1, 2, 3, 4 -- and Mendoza with
a BIG atomic drop takes the wind out of Riley's sails!
[Stone]
And makes another unwilling applicant for the Vienna Boy's Choir.
[Escobar]
Carlos with a bodyslam ... whips Riley into the ropes -- and a
HIGH elevation back body drop ... and a dropkick as Riley tries
to stand!
[Helics]
Just wait until Tskova or Mischief get their hands on him ...
he'll have a hard time standing, let alone drop-kicking anyone.
[Escobar]
Carlos scoops up Riley from the side ... and a salto suplex ...
Carlos setting up Riley now for the "Heart-to-Heart" suplex,
and this one could be over right now -- HE'S GOT IT! 1 ... 2 ...
and THREE!!
{Miles Davis's "Concierto de Aranjuez" keys up to a nice crowd
reaction.}
[Escobar]
And Carlos Mendoza showing he's ready for 1997 in top form!
=================================================================
COMMERCIAL BREAK: Not-So-Risky Predictions for 1997 -- McD's will
try and get you to eat an Arch Deluxe ... no Chicago Museum is
safe from THE RELIC ... is the Caravan a car? A van? No, really,
we're asking ... AWI EXPLOSION for your Sony Playstation or
N64 -- too much wrestling action for one system ...
=================================================================
{We're back in the studio, with Paul & Trinity.}
[Saunders]
Y'know, Paul, if you had one of Carlos's designs instead of that
suit, YOU might do better with the ladies ...
[Stone]
Hey! This suit cost me a lot of money! OK, it cost the league a
lot of money ... anyway, when you bring up money, you have to
bring up "the Billion Dollar Babe," Melissa Wright. And as
you're about to see, bringing up Melissa Wright is something
Dacia Blackthorne can't seem to HELP doing nowadays ...
[Saunders]
Being involved in involuntary plastic surgery with a concrete
floor instead of a scalpel will do that to a girl ...
[Stone]
Y'know, I never thought of it that way.
[Saunders]
{pinches Paul's cheeks} You're so cute when you're clueless.
[Stone]
Uhh ... roll tape ...
=================================================================
{Dacia Blackthorne makes her way to Chad Duncan at the Interview
Spot looking none too happy. Chad straightens his tie in obvious
discomfort.}
[Duncan]
Well, Miss Blackthorne, it's always a pleasure to have you here
with us. I can tell by your expression that you're not in the
best of moods, so I'll cut to the chase. What are your comments
about Union II concerning your match with "The Billion Dollar
Babe" Melissa Wright?
{Dacia glares at Chad for a moment as if she is about to explode,
but then she seems to calm herself}
[Blackthorne]
What can I say? I don't make excuses. I could say I was
concentrating too much on the tag tourney for the AWI Women's
Tag Team Belts. I could say that my little run-in with "Dream
Sucks-a-Bus" at the Brenda Storm match took more out of me than
I was willing to admit. I could even say that maybe I've been
pushing too hard and trying to do to many things at once since I
got here in the AWI. Seems like I've been nicked up and banged
around ever since I got here. First 13, then Wright, followed
by the candy stripe twins.
But I'll tell you what, Chad. Plain and simple, I lost. On that
night Melissa Wright was a better wrestler than I was. It happens
all the time in sports. When the top dog gets upset by the
underdog. Look at the 49ers against the Packers last year. Even
the Holyfield-Tyson fight.
{Dacia takes a moment to let her statement sink in before
continuing.}
[Blackthorne]
But I'm not gonna make excuses because I know one thing for sure.
It definitely /WON'T/ happen again. Wright, you've been a thorn
in my side ever since I got here. First you cost me the title at
The Long Hot Summer. Then you manage to screw me out of a rematch
by having this four-way runaround between you, me, Fallen Angel,
and Tori Johannsen of all people! Go ahead and keep playing
games, Wright, because you and me /STILL/ ain't through yet! Your
next match is against the NEW Womens Champion in the AWI, the
Fallen Angel, and you can bet you /WON'T/ get an easy night from
her. Another thing you can bet on is this: you /WON'T/ get the
belt from Fallen Angel and you /WON'T/ get the belt. PERIOD!!!
There'll be a cold day in hell before you wear AWI gold before
*me*, rich kid. That's a promise you can take to the bank!
[Duncan]
And what of the AWI Tag Team Tournament that is now in progress?
What do you think of you and O'Malley's chance at winning?
{Dacia kinda looks at Chad with a wicked smirk on her face.}
[Blackthorne]
I'll tell ya this, Chad. Dream Sucks a Bus won't win it. Wright
and whoever won't win it. So that leaves me, Susan, and the other
gals in the AWI as top billing!
{With that last comment Blackthorne hops down from the interview
spot and heads down the aisle giving high fives and hugs all the
way to the locker room.}
=================================================================
[Saunders]
Paul, you're a comedian, right?
[Stone]
I keep saying that, but nobody ever believes me.
[Saunders]
Well, do you speak Gaelic?
[Stone]
No -- no, that's one talent I never picked up. Why?
[Saunders]
It just seems to me that "Sucks-A-Bus" must be a lot funnier to
Dacia than it is to me -- I was thinking maybe it was one of
those obscure foreign puns ...
[Stone]
No, I think it's just Dacia being catty.
[Saunders]
That /had/ occurred to me ... oh, well. On to the next match?
[Stone]
That's what the cue cards say.
[Saunders]
Ssshh ... up next, a great matchup between two of the top-flight
competitors in the AWI, emphasis on "flight": Crystal Crow, and
"Canadian Sensation" Chris Sim ... and at least one person with
a vested interest in the match had this to say ...
=================================================================
{Jade Tiger stands holding a map of North America. He smiles with
glee and he deliberately tears the map into long strips.}
[Jade Tiger]
HA HA HA! American icon, "Superman" falls at the hands of my
protege, Crystal Crow. Perfect representative of the American
ideal ... overrated, underskilled. A nation as corrupt as its
heroes and leaders.
Tonight, the 'Canadian Sensation' Chris Sim ... more western
filth. How can you hope to defeat a skilled warrior from the Far
East, a man who is able to soar on the slightest breath from the
great mountain? Prepare yourself for utter humilation, you, your
country, your fans.
Soon, we will all see the second leg of the Crystal Crow North
American Embarassment Tour.
=================================================================
{"Flyin' High Again" by Ozzy Osbourne blares thru the speakers to
a rousing chorus of boos.}
[Escobar]
And the fans show their "appreciation" for the Crystal Crow, as
his mentor, the Jade Tiger, leads the Asian aerialist to the
ring ...
[Helics]
Big schmeal. If they feel like booing him, they should have the
guts to take it in the ring.
[Stone]
You're all heart, Mike.
{The fans' reaction changes considerably as "Canadian Sensation"
Chris Sim makes his way to ringside, Carlos Mendoza right behind
him.}
[Escobar]
Oh, for the love of ... Jade Tiger is now getting in Sim's face,
even before the match starts, as Crystal Crow "purifies" the
ringposts ...
[Helics]
Hey, he has a RIGHT to complain? Do you THINK Carlos has a
manager's license? Bull -- this is a beatdown in the making!
[Stone]
Yeah, but whose beatdown?
[Helics]
Stan needs to pay me more.
[Escobar]
Mendoza getting into it with Tiger now, and the elder man seems
to be seeing the lig--MADRE DIOS!!! Crystal Crow from out of
NOWHERE with a Tiger's Pounce from the apron, and he's just LAID
Sim OUT!
[Helics]
Yeah! Pick him up! Do it again!
[Stone]
Um, I think Mendoza has something to say about that ...
[Helics]
So? Crow can claim he doesn't speak Spanish.
[Stone]
Yeah, but se habla "Suplex?"
[Helics]
For once, ya gotta point.
[Escobar]
Crow avoiding a confrontation with Mendoza, although the Tiger is
more than interested in keeping Carlos's attention ... the Crow
rolls Sim in the ring now, and I believe we're actually going to
have a match ...
[Helics]
You say that like it's a good thing.
[Escobar]
The Crow slapping his Crow's Talon on almost immediately, and
that Asiatic Spike seems especially effective now ...
[Stone]
Having your neck wrenched into the concrete will do that.
[Escobar]
Sim shrugging out of it ... the Crow keeping up the attack now
with a blistering series of martial arts kicks ... he whips Sim
HARD into the corner ... handsprings in -- NO! Sim with a
dropkick to floor the Asian!
[Stone]
Doctor, I believe we have a pulse after all.
[Helics]
Give it a few minutes.
[Escobar]
Sim hoisting Crow off his feet, and he SLAMS him back to the
canvas ... and and now he whips Crow -- no, Crow reverses it,
and Sim again slams into the turnbuckle ...
[Helics]
I think I see where the Crow's going with this.
[Escobar]
I can't wait to hear the theory.
[Helics]
Well, you know how you can shock rats in a cage into staying away
from their food bowl, or junk like that? I think the Crow's
trying to make Sim afraid of those turnbuckles.
[Stone]
Fascinating ... have you considered Geraldo?
[Helics]
Are you afraid of frying pans yet?
[Stone]
Never mind ...
[Escobar]
The Crow measuring Sim up for a thrust kick -- Sim recovers too
quickly for him, though, and drops Crow with another dropkick!
Crow goes for the legsweep -- but Sim with a springboard off the
ropes to bounce away from it! Amazing display of quick reflexes!
[Helics]
Yeah, running away's gonna be a needed skill for him.
[Escobar]
Sim charging back in, but the Crow stuns him with a chop to the
neck ... whips him into the ropes ... criss-cross ... and the
Crow takes Sim down with a bulldog lariat! And again, he sticks
the Crow's Talon ...
[Helics]
Two good reasons for this. One, it grounds "Air Canada" ... two,
it really, REALLY hurts.
[Escobar]
Sim again out of the spike, but the Crow continues his assault
with another chop, and he just FLOORS Sim with a second one! He
bounces into the ropes, drops the leg -- ON NOTHING BUT AIR! Once
again, one has to be impressed with Chris Sim's presence of mind
in this match-up -- even dazed, his mind's always on his
opponent ...
[Stone]
As opposed to Mike, whose mind might be in Zimbabwe by now.
[Helics]
I'm warning you ...
[Escobar]
Sim uses the ropes again to bounce away from a kick from the Crow
-- and comes right back with a dropkick of his own! Scoops up
Crystal Crow, and sends him crashing right back to the mat! He
lifts Crow once more to his feet -- and an irish whip to the
turnbuckle gives Sim a measure of revenge -- he charges in, Crow
running out to meet him -- and Crow wins, with a bulldog lariat.
[Stone]
You know, my match strategy wouldn't include taking a whole lot
of moves like that ...
[Helics]
Your match strategy would involve staying out of the arena.
[Stone]
Would you get paid for doing that?
[Escobar]
Crow somersaulting to build momentum as he dashes to the ropes,
Sim standing up -- and Crystal Crow with a sunset flip! 1 ...
but Sim quickly out ...
[Stone]
I'm surprised he kicked out that fast -- I'd think he'd be
expecting a five-count ...
[Helics]
Huh?
[Stone]
Y'know ... "One ... eh ... two ... eh ..."
[Helics]
When I do get around to hurting you, remind me to hurt you bad.
[Escobar]
Crow locking up Sim in a knee armlock ... voluntarily breaks the
hold, and pulls Sim to his feet -- but that's a bad idea, as Sim
scoops HIM up for a bodyslam!
[Stone]
Jade Tiger's next memo to Crow will probably read something like
"don't do that."
[Helics]
Accompanied by a swift kick to the head, I think.
[Escobar]
Ooo -- that's exactly what Sim just got ... I think he spent too
much time recovering his own senses after that slam ...
[Helics]
Which is why he's flopping around on the mat now.
[Stone]
That's often a symptom, I understand.
[Escobar]
Crow throws Sim into the turnbuckle again ... and follows it in
with a thrust kick! Sim tumbles to the mat, and Crow makes the
cover ... 1 ... and again Sim with a fast kickout, and Crow with
a retaliatory chop ...
[Stone]
Which is probably better than no chop at all ...
[Escobar]
He whips Sim into the ropes -- but Sim catches him with a cross
bodyblock ... and bodyslams the Crow one more time ... he goes up
top ...
[Stone]
Guess the conditioning didn't work.
[Escobar]
And a BIG flying elbow drop! He heads into the ropes ... the Crow
up -- and he regains the advantage with a legwheel takedown to
take the momentum away from Sim ...
[Helics]
They don't teach Canadians pin covers, I guess. Dumb move.
[Escobar]
Crow whips Sim into the ropes -- but Sim recovers with a
dropkick! Sim like a shot over to the ropes as Crow gets up --
AND SIM WITH A CROSS BODYBLOCK TAKES BOTH MEN TO THE OUTSIDE!! As
the French would say, /incroyable!/
[Stone]
Or as the Crystal Crow might say, OW ...
[Escobar]
Sim rolls the Crow back into the ring ... he's signalling for the
Crosshairs, and the crowd goes insane! He's up top ... and it's
-- NO! The Crow pulls Tom Newman into the way! Newman's flat on
his back! Sim knows he's in trouble, backing away -- but the Crow
dropkicks him -- and Sim tumbles over the ropes to the outside!
[Helics]
It's about TIME this got ugly in a good way ...
[Escobar]
The Jade Tiger moving towards Sim -- but Mendoza has different
ideas -- he's chasing the Tiger away!
[Helics]
Hey, where does he get off doing that? Who does he think he is,
the referee?
[Stone]
Well, right now the referee doesn't think he's a referee ... he
probably thinks he's a monkey ...
[Escobar]
The Crow setting up Sim -- no, Sim's shaken the daze off, and he
grabs Crystal Crow -- and tosses him into the steel railing!
[Helics]
OK, I can respect that.
[Escobar]
Jade Tiger's LIVID, as Chris rolls the Crow into the ring ... he
signals again for the Crosshairs ... he's up top -- and -- and
Crow out of the way, Sim eats only mat! Sim staggering to his
feet -- and the Crow floors him with a dropkick ... he's got the
Crow's Talon applied now ...
[Helics]
This is what's commonly known as a "hurting vacation" for a
wrestler like Crystal Crow ...
[Stone]
He better hope this hold works, because it's taking Newman
forever to wake up ...
[Escobar]
Referee Newman finally back up to his feet, as the Crow hoists up
a very hurt Chris Sim -- and levels him with a roundhouse kick!
He whips Sim into the ropes ... TIGER'S POUNCE! 1 ... 2 ...
THREE!!!
[Kinsman]
The winner of this match ... in a time of 9:16 ... the CRYSTAL
CROW!!!
{BIG boos as "Flyin' High Again" starts up, while Mendoza's
quickly in the ring to avoid further punishment against his
friend.}
[Helics]
Haha ... stick THAT in your touk and smoke it, Sim!
[Escobar]
And Crow's cunning and chicanery manages to net him another tally
in the win column.
[Helics]
Hey -- there are no asterisks in the AWI record books ...
[Stone]
Mainly because you took an eraser to them ...
[Helics]
What's your point?
[Stone]
Point? I don't have a point ...
=================================================================
COMMERCIAL BREAK:
"Morning" from the Peer Gynt Suite plays softly, over animated
footage of a warm spring day in the woods ... the trees are
growing new leaves ... squirrels, rabbits, and deer frolic in
the distance ... a robin lands in the foreground, pecking at
the ground ... he grabs a worm, as another robin lands ... the
two begin tussling over the worm, and the music suddenly changes
to a screeching electric guitar as the bigger one wraps a wing
around the other robin's head and suplexes him, then covers him
as a chipmunk hops over and slaps the ground 3 times ...
[Announcer]
SPRING STAMPEDE 1997, LIVE on pay-per-view, coming soon ... will
YOU be ready for it?
=================================================================
{And once again, we rejoin Paul & Trinity in the studio}
[Stone]
Well, looks like the Crystal Crow is on a roll ...
[Saunders]
Bleah. I just wish somebody would up and flatten that pig, Jade
Tiger. I still can't believe what he did to Angela Dante.
[Stone]
While Chris Sim's still looking for a turn of luck since Union II
... hey, I just realized something!
[Saunders]
What?
[Stone]
We've never heard what YOU thought of Union II ... what was the
view like from the sidelines?
[Saunders]
You're so THOUGHTFUL to ask ...
[Stone]
Like I said, it's in the cue cards.
[Saunders]
You won't let that go, will you?
[Stone]
Seriously -- just this once, anyway ...
[Saunders]
I'll admit, I was surprised by John Robertson's title win.
Frankly, I expected that John would outsmart himself -- he seems
to be trying too hard to be the Syndicate's top dog, and I think
it's going to cause friction between him and the other members. I
think that also explains Intensive Care's sleepwalking through
their defense against Boot Hill. As Megaton showed, Boot Hill's
NOT the challenge Intensive Care made them out to be ...
[Stone]
Any other surprises?
[Saunders]
I WAS impressed by the way Jack Fury beat "the Olympian" Gary
White ... and I really didn't think Dan Lea could beat El
Maestro. Good show ...
[Stone]
You're getting those moonie-eyes again ...
[Saunders]
Oh, hush ...
[Stone]
Well, there are a few other folks who still have Union II on
their minds ...
================================================================
{Open to home video camera footage of a party in progress. The
setting is an upper class restaurant, and many well dressed men
and women mingle with the members of Rooks Enterprises in the
background. In the foreground and equally well dressed, Jilliam
Bole and Kim Lee stand to either side of a tuxedoed Johnny Rooks
each wearing one of the North American Tag Team Title belts. Mr.
Rooks speaks to the camera.}
[Johnny Rooks]
Ahhh, there you are! Welcome to the _soiree_ we're having in
honor of the newest champions of the AWI, and of Rooks
Enterprises. These men have brought honor to themselves *and* to
my organization by capturing the North American titles that have
had such poor fortune of late.
[Kim Lee]
We have waited a very long time to hold these symbols of ...
[Jillian Bole]
... merit. Indeed, not so long ago, it seemed ...
[Lee]
... inconceivable that we could attain any titles, but Johnny
Rooks believed in us, and ...
[Bole]
... we knew that without biased referees we could reclaim our
reputation.
[Lee]
And that is exactly what we have done, in a contest with worthy
opponents and steel bars to keep the referees OUT!
[Bole]
Now that we have vindicated ourselves, we would like to give
credit where credit is due.
[Lee]
That is where Mr. Johnny Rooks and Rooks Enterprises come in.
[Bole]
Mr. Rooks, since we have joined your organization our star has
risen from the depths almost to the pinnacle of this sport.
[Lee]
We extend our thanks and continuing loyalty.
[Rooks]
Gentlemen, I humbly accept your accolades. However, I would point
out that *you* had the talent all along. All it took was
redirection, and refocus, to bring it to the fore.
[Bole]
And now, for the future, we realize that many of you still
harbor resentment towards us.
[Lee]
At this moment many of you are thinking, "It was a fluke." {said
while shaking his index finger in negation}
[Bole]
So we guarantee ...
[Lee]
... that we will win our first title defense against whoever the
championship committee decides is worthy.
[Bole]
Furthermore, we stipulate that it must be a steel cage match, and
if we ...
[Lee]
... lose? Then we will renounce the name 'Perfection' as well as
our claim to these belts.
[Rooks]
Gentlemen, I have *no* doubt as to your hold on those belts,
*and* to the rights to your _nommes de guerre_.
=================================================================
{fade out ... and into the personal work-out facility of Tamara's
Stable. Perry Toxic is spotting Tyler at the weight lifting
bench, while Rictor Showtime can be seen relentlessly pounding on
a punching bag in the corner. The camera turns to Tamara, as she
enters the room.}
[Tamara]
Well, they did it to me again. {Tamara looks for sympathy, but is
ignored by her charges} Are you guys listening to me?
{Tamara taps her foot on the floor and begins to fume as Rictor
Showtime and the Toxic Twins /CONTINUE/ to ignore Tamara.}
[Tamara]
That's it! LISTEN UP!!!!
{The camera turns to Rictor Showtime, just in time to see the
punching bag knock him back a few feet. The camera then turns to
the weight lifting bench, where Perry Toxic can be seen pulling
the bar off his brother's chest.}
[Tamara]
That's better. Now I don't have to tell you guys how disappointed
I am in our lack of success at Union II. That's why you're
doubling up on your work-out efforts. What's really ticking me
off are these stupid fines.
[Rictor]
Don't look at me. I haven't done zip since we got nailed with
that "3 Strikes" bull.
[Tyler]
What /EXACTLY/ are we being fined for anyway?
[Tamara]
Let's see. I'm being fined for talking to Greg Gardner during a
match ...
[Perry]
We wouldn't want you to practice your constitutional right to
free speech.
[Tamara]
... and you guys are being fined for pulling me out of there when
everything went to hell. By the way, nice job getting me run over
by Justice and those megaputz weenies, the Honor Guard.
[Rictor]
What can we do? It's not like we can just jump someone.
[Tamara]
Actually ... it's a lot like that. If we're gonna get fined for
every little thing that happens in this hole, we might as well
get fined for stuff we do. What do you say guys?
[Tyler]
It's about freakin' time!
[Rictor and Perry]
Works for me.
[Tamara]
Good. NOW GET BACK TO WORK YOU WORTHLESS JERKS!!!!!
{The camera fades to black as Rictor, Tyler and Perry start
working out, harder than ever.}
=================================================================
[Stone]
Actually, I was talking about Alliance Home Video, who's selling
Union II for your home collection at only $22.95 ...
[Saunders]
Poor baby ... I'm sure the editing crew didn't do it to you on
purpose.
[Stone]
{mock-sobbing} That's OK ... I'll -- I'll get over it ...
eventually ...
[Saunders]
Well, we have a whole commercial break coming up for you to
compose yourself ...
[Stone]
{blowing his nose} I'll be fine ... {to himself} and I was so
nice to them ... {aloud} We'll be back ...
=================================================================
COMMERCIAL BREAK: Got a headache? Nuprin is nu and improved ...
if you're caught travelling, stay at a Holiday Inn Express, and
call it a holiday ... if you switch to Sprint, maybe Candace
really WILL shut up ...
=================================================================
[Stone]
OK ... I'm on the rebound, folks!
[Saunders]
Look out ... which is what somebody needed to tell -- well, just
watch the Courtroom coming up ... I STILL can't believe he did
that. Oooohh, if I could just get my hands on him ...
[Stone]
Count to ten, Trinity, just count to ten. Folks, sit down, take a
few deep breaths, and prepare yourself for the unexpected, on
this edition of the Courtroom ...
=================================================================
[Voice of Kinsman]: And now, ladies and gentlemen, back by
popular demand ... MIRANDA WRIGHT'S COURTROOM!!!!
{The lights come up on the Courtroom set as "The Perry Mason
Theme" cues up on the speakers. Loud boos erupt as Miranda Wright
steps through the curtain with a microphone in her hand.}
[Miranda Wright]
That's right, AWI! Show me how much you care!
{The boos get louder as Miranda steps in the ring.}
[Wright]
If you looked at my record for Union, you'll see that not only
did the DA show Chris Sim the way back to the border, not only
did my sister Melissa show Dacia the way to the arena doors, but
*I* was responsible for getting the AWI to see that Melissa
Wright is *THE* best thing going in the Women's division today,
because I'm casting my vote to break the tie!
{More boos.}
[Stone]
She can do that? Does that mean Dacia has to give her
statue back?
[Escobar]
I wouldn't worry about it, Paul -- I think Miranda
probably voted more than once already.
[Wright]
But the greatest injustice of the entire program was that I was
cheated out of the Best Manager Award by that lowlife Robbie
Stevens, but to show her appreciation for her big sister and what
kind of a manager she's got, I've been told that I'm getting the
award I deserve tonight. Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce,
the most beautiful woman in the AWI and your future Ladies'
Champion ... "THE BILLION DOLLAR BABE"!!!
{"Misirlou" from Dick Dale and the Del-Tones starts up, but for
some reason, D.A. Bookthrower is the one that emerges from the
back, with his briefcase in hand. The music fades out, as a
confused crowd boos the former World Champion.}
[Wright]
Well, DA, I must say this is a pleasant surp--
{DA yanks the microphone out of her hand.}
[D.A. Bookthrower]
Shut up! I'm going to make this short, sweet, and to the point
... YOU'RE FIRED!!!
{Crowd pops. Miranda looks at DA as if it's a joke.}
[Bookthrower]
You don't believe me? Well, believe this ...
{D.A. hands her some papers from the briefcase.}
[Wright]
DIVORCE PAPERS?!?!?
[Bookthrower]
That's right, I don't want to have anything to do with you
professionally or privately!
[Escobar]: This is simply incredible! I was expecting the
unexpected, but I never expected something like THIS!
[Helics]: You better have a good reason for this, D.A. ...
you could be throwing your second career away ...
[Wright]
{on the verge of tears} But why? I don't understand why!
[Bookthrower]
Let's see ... you promised me that I would get my World title
back and get my shot one-on-one with Danny Boy McGill and it
never happened! Finally, after a year of waiting, I get granted
a title shot from John Robertson, so don't you even think about
taking the credit!
Your ringside skills are horrible! Who was the one that lost my
briefcase? Who's the weak little woman I have to keep guys like
the WarBirds from carrying away? Who is the one outside the ring
adding up her bank account while I'm in the ring convicting
felons? You never offer me any outside help anymore!
And, speaking of bank accounts, you're more worried about your
precious little sister Melissa than you are about me. Melissa's
had more chances at titles in 6 months in the AWI than I've had
in a year-and-a-half! I'm getting tired of sitting on the
backburner. Hell, I don't even have the TV Title any more!
Dacia Blackthorne was right ... you *are* nothing but a has-been!
[Helics]: OK, that's a good reason.
{"Misirlou" cues up again as DA is interrupted. This time Melissa
Wright shows up through the curtain. She has an angry expression
on her face as she stalks the DA to ringside. She whispers
something in Miranda's ear, who looks up with tears streaming
down her face.}
[Melissa Wright]:
{grabbing the mike as the crowd pops} Let me tell you something!
If you want to stand here and tell my sister who the no-talent is
or who the has-been is ...
[Helics]: Hmm ... apparently, D.A. didn't check all the
evidence before making his case ...
[Stone]: Family sticks together. It's like glue, y'know.
[Melissa Wright]
{gets in DA's face} I'll show you who the has-been is!
{Melissa leans forward and kisses Bookthrower ... then turns
around to nail Miranda with the microphone)
[Escobar]: MADRE DIOS!
[Stone]: Really, really cheap glue. Like on Post-It notes.
[Escobar]: Melissa Wright just battering and kicking away her
sister ... this is quite simply despicable!
[Helics]
Yep, I agree totally. Popcorn time!
[Escobar]
She picks up her Miranda ... D.A.'s handing her the briefcase, oh
-- I don't believe this! She's your WIFE, D.A.!!
[Helics]
WAS, Justin, WAS ... now she's so much sticky stuff.
[Escobar]
Melissa creams Miranda with the briefcase ... she's setting her
own sister up for a Bankbreaker on that briefcase -- HERE COMES
DANNY BOY McGILL!!! Bookthrower and Wright clear the area, barely
having time to grab the case!! McGill checking on Miranda now --
and talk about strange bedfellows ... oh, please -- Bookthrower
and Melissa kissing in the aisle and hugging before heading back
to the lockers ... this is terrible ...
=================================================================
[Saunders]
I'll wring his overmuscled neck ...
[Stone]
Hey, hey -- watch the venom, Trinity ...
[Saunders]
Hey, we ladies have to stick together.
[Stone]
What about Melissa Wright?
[Saunders]
She's not a lady, she's a b--
[Stone]
HEY, hey, and now a word from our sponsors ... you know, DISNEY,
NINTENDO, stuff that KIDS buy?
[Saunders]
{blushing and looking sheepish} Oh, right, sorry ...
=================================================================
COMMERCIAL BREAK: E-VEEEE-TA, E-VEEEE-TA! E-VEEEE-TA, E-VEEETA!
See the movie, buy the soundtrack, live the experience ... watch
TUESDAY NIGHT THUNDER on FOX -- we paid a lot of money to get
there, the least you can do is watch ... eat McDonald's fries,
just don't try to get them from Grant or Scottie ... and an
editorial note: GO PATS! GO PATS! GO PATS!
=================================================================
{When we come back to the show, we're already back at ringside,
as Chad Duncan is standing in the aisle ... Ken Mischief emerges
from the back to a chorus of boos.}
[Duncan]
Just a moment of your time, Ken ... you have heard the challenge
of "El Scorpion" Carlos Mendoza ... are you willing to accept
that challenge?
[Mischief]
I am going to tell you one thing right here and right now. I am
afraid of no-one here in the AWI, and if people want to run off
their mouths on what they are going to do to me in the ring,
that's their prerogative.
Mendoza, you have been a pain in the ass for a long time
complaining about what I did to you. I did nothing wrong, but now
that you ticked me off, that match at the Long Hot Summer will
feel like a cakewalk after I get through with you.
Think about what you got yourself into, Mendoza, because once
your mouth opened that you wanted to wrestle me, the AWI's
insurance bill just went up.
{Mischief stomps his way to ringside.}
[Duncan]
It looks like we have a match, then ... back to you, Justin ...
[Escobar]
Indeed, we are back, as Ken Mischief reaches the ring ... and
this should be an interesting contrast in styles ...
{Justin is momentarily interrupted as "Dead Souls" by Nine Inch
Nails blares over the speakers, to a rousing set of cheers.}
[Escobar]
Not to mention a contrast in crowd reaction! The fans VERY
appreciative of the mysterious superstar from the Isle of Wight,
as the Mist Angel makes his way to ringside ...
[Helics]
The fans can cheer all they want, but in about a minute or so,
Ken Mischief is going to hand the Angel his harp back!
[Escobar]
And Ken taunting the smaller man to submit to a test of strength
... surprisingly, the Mist Angel accepts ... and Ken quickly
gaining the advantage -- he pulls the Angel in, scoops him up,
and SLAMS him to the mat ... but the Angel catches Mischief off
guard with a legsweep! Both men up ... the Angel with a dropkick,
Mischief staggered but doesn't fall ... the Angel takes the
opportunity to whip the big man -- no, Mischief reverses it,
sending Mist Angel into the turnbuckle! And he charges in --
nobody home! Ken staggers out -- Mist Angel in the air with a
springboard bodypress, and a cover! But Ken shrugs out easily!
[Helics]
If Mist Angel thinks he can win the match that quick, he's
getting too much fumes from his facepaint ...
[Stone]
Hey, you never know. Maybe he thought Mischief couldn't count to
three?
[Helics]
Mischief didn't even need to count to 1.
[Escobar]
The Mist Angel keeping up the attack, peppering Mischief with
martial arts strikes ... whips him into the ropes -- and drops
him with another legsweep, following by planting a knee in the
bigger man's chest!
[Stone]
Y'know, I think if Ellis was here, he'd say something about Ken
maybe being too overconfident, and not factoring in the Mist
Angel's greater experience.
[Helics]
Whereas you would say ...
[Stone]
"Wow."
[Helics]
I think Ken's next match should be against YOU.
[Escobar]
Ken up, but gets caught in a hiptoss ... the Angel into the
ropes, hops over Ken on the return, both men off the ropes ...
handspring by Angel, and Ken is FLOORED by the elbow! The Angel
going up top now as Ken staggers to his feet ... and it's a
DROPKICK-- BUT KEN OUT of the way! The Mist Angel probably wishes
he had THAT one back!
[Helics]
I do too. It'd be fun to watch him go "splat" again.
[Escobar]
Ken advancing, and not even a flurry of karate can keep him away
this time -- he's got Angel up, and down VERY fast! Ken taking
some time to offer an opinion to referee Tom Newman, before
continuing the attack -- bad mistake! Angel with a snap mare, and
he locks a sleeper on Mischief!
[Helics]
These young guys never learn ... it's not jaw, then brawl, it's
jaw WHILE brawling ...
[Escobar]
The Mist Angel trying to keep Mischief grounded, but not even
that sleeper is going to overcome Ken's sheer power ... Ken
slowly working his way up to his feet -- he's got the Angel
shoved off him -- and WHAT a short-arm clothesline! Now it's
Ken's turn to apply a hold, as he crushes the Mist Angel's head
in a viselock!
[Helics]
Yeah! Yeah! I wanna hear a crack!
[Stone]
Mike, please, I understand kids watch this.
[Helics]
They can cover their ears if the crack's too loud.
[Escobar]
It doesn't look like that'll be a problem, Michael, as Mischief
decides to pick up the Angel instead, and AGAIN powers him to
the mat ... he whips him into the ropes -- BIG sidewalk slam!
[Helics]
Pretty soon, the "Mist" in Mist Angel is going to refer to the
oddly-colored film he forms on the canvas!
[Escobar]
Mischief taunting the fans ... he's got the Angel HIGH up in the
air, and NAILS him with the powerbomb!
[Stone]
OK, THAT'S a trip through the air I'll bet the Angel wishes he
had back.
[Escobar]
Mischief putting on a clinic now, cinching up the Mist Angel, and
leveraging him over with a belly-to-belly suplex ... he picks him
up again, and a snap suplex! Mischief picking up the Mist Angel
... this could be it -- but Mist Angel's resisting -- monkey flip
by Mist Angel! This man's resilience is unbelievable!
[Helics]
So's his stupidity.
[Stone]
I don't see how trying to avoid a suplex is stupid ... I'd
consider a good career move, personally.
[Escobar]
The Mist Angel setting up Mischief for a piledriver now, as the
fans go wild! But wait ... he can't get him up! He tries again--
NO! Mischief with a backdrop! He grabs the Angel's legs, and this
could get ugly -- wait ... he's locked on a Boston Crab! The
Angel in SERIOUS trouble here ...
[Helics]
I SUPPOSE I should be happy that he has technical knowledge ...
oh, what the heck. If it's hurting the Angel, it's a good thing.
I can adapt.
[Stone]
How wonderful of you.
[Escobar]
The ropes are within reach of the Mist Angel, but I'm not sure
he's even aware of where he is ... we could be seeing a
submission here ... no, wait -- YES! The Angel finds the ropes,
and Newman forces the break! Mischief not happy -- and the Angel
surprises him with a legsweep! Mist Angel with a backslide as
Ken stands up -- 1 ... 2 ... and Mischief BARELY out in time ...
[Helics]
Now I'd say Ken's REALLY "not happy".
[Escobar]
Mist Angel with a chop to the neck, stuns Ken ... whips him to
the ropes -- and a cross-body block by the Angel! He picks up
Mischief, pointing to the corner -- but Mischief with a fireman's
carry takedown stops the Mist Angel's momentum, and he locks the
headvise on again.
[Helics]
Makes sense. Your opponent's acting too smart for his own good,
squeeze some brains out until he's back to being stupid.
[Stone]
I am NOT eating lunch with you today if you keep this up.
[Escobar]
The Angel working his way to his feet, though obviously in pain
... he's almost out -- Mischief changes tactics, and rocks Mist
Angel with a DDT! That could be it ... Mist Angel about to be in
"BIG TROUBLE" here ...
[Helics]
He was in big trouble when he signed the match ... this is a
mere formality.
[Escobar]
Mischief whips him to the ropes ... scoops him up for the--
WHERE DID THAT COME FROM!?! Mist Angel converting the
tilt-a-whirl into a 'rana, and Mischief caught TOTALLY by
surprise! He's up to his feet -- no, he falls back again ... and
the Angel has him over by the turnbuckle ... he's got him up top
... he's got it cinched ... Mischief blocking ...
[Helics]
Comeoncomeoncomeon ...
[Escobar]
AND THE ANGEL WITH A CRADLE SUPLEX FROM THE TOP!
[Helics]
NO!!!
[Stone]
OK, is the proper reaction here a mindless scream, or is actual
religious conversion involved?
[Escobar]
Newman with the count ... 1 ... 2 ... AND THREE!!! I don't
believe it! I simply don't believe it!
[Kinsman]
Your winner ... the MIST ANGEL!!!!
{Big pop as "Dead Souls" starts up again.}
[Escobar]
Ken Mischief with an incredible display of dominance during this
match, but the veteran showing Mischief still has a lot to
learn-- QUE! Mischief just clotheslined Mist Angel from behind!
The Angel laid flat out on the concrete, as Mischief just stalks
away, the fans VERY unappreciative!
[Helics]
He doesn't have all THAT much to learn, apparently.
=================================================================
COMMERCIAL BREAK: 57 channels and nothing on? USSB can top that
with over 200 nothing channels ... If you want to know what's
happening on Melrose Place, GET HELP! PLEASE, GET HELP! ... The
New Adventures of Robin Hood on TNT: a sign of the Apocalypse,
if nothing else ... Always the real thing, Always Coca-Cola ...
=================================================================
[Stone]
We're back again, folks ... and now you know why Nuprin is a BIG
sponsor of this show.
[Saunders]
I know I should feel sorry for the Mist Angel ... but I don't
know. He's so ... wierd.
[Stone]
But it's a good kind of wierd.
[Saunders]
Well ... while I ponder THAT thought ... you people at home will
get a chance to ponder THESE thoughts, from the new undisputed
North American champ ...
=================================================================
[Chad Duncan]
Ladies and gentlemen, the man who is once again the AWI North
American Champion ... JACK FURY!!!!!
{"Here Comes Trouble" cues up as the fans go crazy. Jack Fury
comes out from behind the curtain with the North American Title
over his shoulder. Fury grins and waves to the fans.}
[Duncan]
Jack, you're now a two-time AWI North American champion ... as
you look on the events that led up to the match at Union, what
are your reflections regarding this whole title situation?
[Jack Fury]
Well, I have only a few things to say about Gary White ... He
said some things at the AWI Awards that showed how low-class he
was. The way he broke the decorum of that event by getting his
digs in at me just showed how selfish he is. Gary, I just want to
say that I hope you enjoyed those two paperweights you won and
that you remember them fondly every time you see me wearing this
belt!
And as far as my being a loser is concerned, the record shows
that I'm 2 for 2 in matches against Gary White ... that fact
speaks for itself, I think. And as far as he said that the
Jackhammer was the most pitiful maneuver he had ever seen, I
hope Gary didn't get sick eating his words after the match.
{The crowd cheers appreciatively, as Fury pauses a moment}
It's funny, but I don't recall that they served *Humble Pie* at
the Awards Dinner. He must have enjoyed it so much that he got
some to go!
{BIG pop from the fans)
[Duncan]
What are your plans now that you've won the North American
Title?
[Fury]
Well, I've had enough of people saying that I'm a loser, that I'm
a fluke, or that I'm a no-talent. You don't win this Championship
because of scoring points. You win it through guts,
determination, and perserverance. Sure, there was a time where I
probably thought I wouldn't get the title back, but this here is
proof of what never giving up will do for you.
I may be the champion, but I have something to prove to the AWI
once and for all. I'm going to defend my belt against anybody,
anytime, anywhere! If that means I have to wrestle three times a
week on TV, I'll do it. If that means I have to drag somebody out
of the back to come out and wrestle me, I'll do it. I don't care
who it is ... I'm going to wrestle every man in this organization
until I've beaten them all and earned everyone's respect!
{Another good-sized pop, and a number of chants for opponent
requests spring up, including "War Machine", "We Say D.A", and
"Clip the Crow" ...}
[Fury]
And if I don't earn your respect, I'll beat it out of you!
{"Here Comes Trouble" starts up again, as Fury waves at the fans
and exits.}
=================================================================
{Studio again, as Paul's flinging cards at the back window.}
[Stone]
This looks so much easier on TV ...
[Saunders]
They've had a lot of practice.
[Stone]
Well, we're up to our main event match for today ... and we've
already heard, in a way, from the challenger ... so let's hear
from the champ! I wonder, tho -- do you suppose the Fallen Angel
and the Mist Angel are related? And if they are, will any other
Angels be headed into the AWI?
[Saunders]
I have absolutely no idea how to respond to that ... so I'll
just let the tape roll ...
=================================================================
{Fallen Angel dances into view, with an electric-halo symbol
surrounding the words "Fallen Angel" in the background, as
"Obsession" by Animotion plays ... she's wearing a purple crop
top and well-worn blue jeans. The Women's Championship belt is
slung over her shoulder.}
[Fallen Angel]
What a three weeks! I've been up! I've been down! It's been a
wild roller coaster ride all leading up to this. {She points to
the title belt.} Tiger Z! I'll give you credit. You took a lot of
punishment and gave it all you had to keep this belt. But babe,
four title defenses in all that time just doesn't cut it. Now
that I have the belt I'm going to defend it regularly, like a
championship should be. I love the spotlight too much to stay out
of it.
Tori! Don't think I've forgotten you. Or all the pain you put me
through. I had two weeks of handcap matches, fighting girls with
one arm behind my back because of you. Don't think I've
forgotten you and your manager trying to steal my title shot.
Aww, I was too injured to wrestle. Well, surpriiiiiiiiise!
And last ... Melissa, Melissa, Melissa. It's been months in the
making. Months of scheming, cheating, dirty tricks, and now
finally you have a shot at the Title. Only guess what! The
sexiest superstar in women's wrestling got there first and
skinned the Tiger!
Now you have to deal with an Angel, and 'Babe', this is no
handicap match. It'll be a classic, the ultimate party girl
against the 'Billion Dollar Babe', but I warn you right now,
Melissa, there is no way you are taking this belt from me.
Partying or wrestling, I can go all night long, and I don't think
you can keep up!
{The music comes back on and Fallen Angel starts dancing as the
scene fades.}
=================================================================
{Cut to ringside, both women in the ring ... the camera focuses
for a moment on Wright's corner, where D.A. Bookthrower smugly
mugs for the camera.}
[Escobar]
Bookthrower's presence at this match a disturbing, if not
surprising, development ... the Angel trying to pay him no heed,
however ... Fallen Angel taunting Wright with the offer of a
collar/elbow tieup, which the Billion Dollar Babe wants NO part
of ...
[Helics]
Why would she? There are 438 ways to cheat from a collar/elbow,
and that weaselly Angel probably knows 'em all.
[Stone]
How do YOU know how many there are?
[Helics]
I counted.
[Stone]
Ahh. You can count that high? I fall asleep after 80 or so.
[Escobar]
Wright finally rolls out of the ring ... and the Fallen Angel
taking the opportunity to strut for the fans!
[Helics]
Oh, VERY intimidating. Wright may as well just leave. {snorts}
[Escobar]
Wright back in the ring, and she lunges at the Angel ... Fallen
Angel punching her away -- and a dropkick ... into the ropes as
Wright gets back up, Wright ducks, criss-cross -- and the Babe
with a sleeper!
[Helics]
Wow, quick match. I wonder if Melissa will have to buy a new
outfit to go with the belt.
[Escobar]
Fallen Angel not really ready to go quite yet, Michael ... she's
out of the sleephold -- but Wright grabs a handful of hair -- and
turns it into a neckbreaker! She throws a headlock on the 'Angel
now ...
[Helics]
Oh, why SLOW things down? You're WINNING ...
[Escobar]
Actually, it seems like a sound strategy, Michael ... take away
the aerial game from the Fallen Angel, and frustrate her tempo.
[Helics]
But she was WINNING.
[Escobar]
Fallen Angel fighting to regain vertical position ... the
struggle seems to be going her way ... she's up to her feet ...
and she chops Wright to break the hold -- Wright whips her to the
ropes -- but the Angel capitalizes with a dropkick! She's up to
the top ... and sails to the mat with an elbow drop! She makes
the cover ... 1 ... but that's all she'll get, Wright kicking out
quickly ... Fallen Angel not relinquishing the offensive, with a
series of chops, then whipping Wright to the ropes -- but she
gets floored by a Billion-Dollar Clothesline!
[Stone]
I'm no expert, but I think that'd have to be called
"relinquishing the offensive".
[Helics]
You should have Justin's job.
[Stone]
But then I'd have to sit in the middle ... I like having room to
swing my arm around ...
[Escobar]
The Babe primping for the crowd, but the Fallen Angel's up, and
she whips Wright into the turnbuckle! And then grabs her arm ...
perhaps she's aggravated her old injury?
[Helics]
Perhaps she's whiny?
[Stone]
Perhaps she's agg-- no, wait, Justin said that ... perhaps she's
wh-- no, wait ... OK, I got it-- oh, never mind.
[Escobar]
Fallen Angel climbing the second rope to drop some fists -- but
Wright grabs her, and Wright with an atomic drop! Wait a minute
... Susan O'Malley's at ringside!
{The camera shows O'Malley coming out of the crowd behind
Bookthrower, who's yelling at Tom Newman ... she's carrying a
big burlap bag.}
[Escobar]
And O'Malley just pulled that bag over Bookthrower's head! D.A.
flailing wildly ... Susan's got the briefcase, and she clubs him
over the head with it!
[Helics]
Oh, COME ON! This is just RIDICULOUS! She's got no business out
there, and she's taking advantage of D.A.'s chivalrous nature to
make him look stupid?
[Stone]
Chivalrous??
[Helics]
I know for a fact Bookthrower would NEVER hit a woman.
[Stone]
No, he just gives his briefcase to Melissa and lets HER do it ...
we got that much already.
[Escobar]
Wright bodyslamming the Fallen Angel ... and now Dacia
Blackthorne's headed down the ring aisle! This is getting VERY
complicated ...
[Helics]
There's nothing complicated about it -- it's just plain
CRIMINAL!
[Escobar]
Wright sees O'Malley with the briefcase now, and slides out of
the ring ... and she takes care of O'Malley with a BIG
clothesline ... but the Angel's out of the ring now, and
dropkicks Wright ... Wright and Angel struggling now ... Angel
whips Wright into the aisle -- and Dacia with a HUGE kneelift!
Angel crawling back into the ring now ... and Dacia JUST HIT THE
LOCH NESS BOMB ON THE CONCRETE! She picks up Wright again-- and
-- and that was the Bankbreaker! She just Bankbreakered Wright,
dropping her into the concrete with her own move!
[Helics]
And the referee's just going to let this happen? Come on, Newman,
get a spine!
[Escobar]
You never complained during the Long Hot Summer's similar events
in a mirror situation, as I recall ...
[Helics]
That was different!
[Stone]
How?
[Helics]
I don't LIKE Dacia.
[Stone]
Oh, of course. Now I understand. No, wait -- I don't. My head
hurts ...
[Escobar]
Actually, Michael, Newman IS taking action now ... he's left the
ring, and is ushering Dacia and Susan out of the ring area ...
and the ANGEL WITH A SUICIDE SPRINGBOARD SPLASH TO THE OUTSIDE!
She rolls Wright into the ring ... climbs to the top ... I think
we're going to see -- YES! ANGELSAULT GUILLOTINE!! The count ...
1 ... 2 ... THR--NO! MELISSA REVERSES IT! NEW COUNT! 1 ... 2 ...
and the champ kicks out JUST in time! SURPRISING resilience from
Melissa Wright!
[Helics]
Ha! It's over for the Fallen Angel now! Melissa's taken Dacia's
AND Angel's best shots, and turned it to her own advantage!
[Escobar]
The advantage isn't hers exactly -- Angel with a roundhouse kick
as both stand ... both women into the ropes -- and Fallen Angel
with a handspring elbow! She forces Wright to the corner, and
sets her up top ... climbs up, jumps -- THE FALL! NICE
hurricarana from the top by the champ! She heads up top again ...
goes for a senton -- Wright out of the way! Melissa exhausted,
gets to her feet ... picks up the champ -- ANGEL with a back
brain kick! Cover! 1 ... 2 ... and Wright pulls the hair, and
gets a shoulder up as the champ's distracted!
[Helics]
Presence of mind to cheat ... that's a good sign ...
[Stone]
So's Aquarius.
[Escobar]
The Angel manages to get to her feet first ... whips Wright into
the ropes, bounces off -- she tumbles, missing her chance to
attack! What happened??
[Helics]
She's clumsy, that's what.
[Stone]
Well, according to the replay here, it looks like Bookthrower
whacked her in the back of the knee with the briefcase ... of
course, I could be wrong.
[Helics]
Well, that, and she's clumsy.
[Stone]
I thought you said Bookthrower wouldn't hit a woman.
[Helics]
He didn't -- the briefcase did.
[Stone]
Wow ... this legal stuff is tricky ...
[Escobar]
Wright whips the Angel back into the ropes, and wraps her up in a
sleeper on the return ... the Angel out fairly quickly ... and
she nails Wright with a back spin fist! Whip into the ropes --
and Bookthrower just pulled the ropes down! Angel tumbles to the
outside! I can't BELIEVE Newman didn't see that!
[Helics]
You've got two beautiful women catfighting in the ring, and you
expect Newman to be paying attention to plain ol' Bookthrower?
[Escobar]
It IS his job ... right, Paul?
[Stone]
Hmmhuh? Oh, sorry, I didn't catch that -- I was busy watching
Angel and Melissa ... what was that?
[Escobar]
Never mind ... Melissa with a front chancery on the champ ...
she cinches up Angel for a suplex -- Fallen Angel blocks! She
reverses the suplex attempt! Amazing!
[Helics]
Nauseating!
[Stone]
Suplexating!
[Helics]
Huh?
[Stone]
OK, it was weak.
[Escobar]
Handspring Elbow from the Angel with both women back in the ring
... she sets up Wright on top -- and hits the Fall again! She's
going up top again ... but Bookthrower's arguing with the referee
again! ANGEL WITH A RANA ON BOOKTHROWER! D.A. didn't see that
coming at all! She's back up top a third time -- ANGELSAULT
GUILLOTINE! 1 ... 2 ... THREE!!!
[AK]
Your winner ... and STILL AWI Women's Champion ... the FALLEN
ANGEL!!
{Huge cheers from the fans as "Obsession" by Animotion starts up
again, and the Angel exhaustedly dances her way down the aisle
after picking up the belt.}
[Escobar]
And an impressive win for the Fallen Angel ... but you know
Melissa Wright will NOT be happy about the actions of Dacia
Blackthorne and Susan O'Malley during this match ...
[Helics]
STAN better not be, either, if he knows what's good for him!
=================================================================
{And back into the studio, with Trinity and Paul one last time.}
[Stone]
WOW, what a match! And am I amazing or what, being able to be in
two places at once!
[Saunders]
The magic of tape editing ... y'know, though, the Fallen Angel's
going to need some magic herself, if she's going to keep the
belt. This match is only going to make her road that much
tougher, by giving her an angry Melissa Wright, a hungry Dacia
Blackthorne, AND a devious Tiger Z on her trail.
[Stone]
Well, this is the part where you try to sell them on next
Explosion, Trinity ... do a good job, because I just bought a
house!
[Saunders]
No pressure, huh Paul? OK, how's this for a main event, then:
World Champion John Robertson's first title defense, as he takes
on D.A. Bookthrower! And you know that after this week, D.A.'s
going to be one VERY upset man.
[Stone]
Just wait until he sees the alimony ruling ...
[Saunders]
So, how's that for a sell?
[Stone]
Hey, I'LL be there.
[Saunders]
We're paid to be.
[Stone]
That does sorta sweeten the pot ... in any case, I hope we'll see
you folks at home here next time as well ... until then, remember
your favorite catchy phrase, and pretend I said it! Bye!
=================================================================
(c) 1997 Allied Sports Entertainment
in association with Haunted Box Productions (
geocities.com/area51/rampart/2060) (
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