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"YOU'RE WATCHING ... CBS ... WELCOME HOME."
======================================================================
_____________________________
|_____________________________|
___ ___ ___ ___
/ /\ \ \ / / / / T H E R E 'S
/ / \ \ \ / / / /
/ / \ \ \ \ /\ / / / / J U S T
/ / \ \ \ \/ \ / / / /
/ / \ \ \ \ V / / / N O
/__/ \__\ \__\___\/ /__/
_____________________________ S U B S T I T U T E
|_____________________________|
======================================================================
{Close-up of Colt Kawaii, concentrating so hard the tip of her tongue
is peeking out the corner of her mouth, one arm raised over her head.
Pull back, and we see a barefoot Colt wearing an off-the-shoulder
nightshirt with a giant Pikachu on it, back against the door of the
showers, marking off with a marker. In the background, a couple of
other ladies can be seen watching a monitor with the Danse Overture
playing on it. They switch between 'Woah!' and 'Awww!' reactions.}
Colt caps it back, closes her eyes, hopes a bit, then whirls around,
looking at the mark ... which is still a goodly way shy of the 5'
marker. She pouts, as Tommie Sparks walks out from the shower, towel
wrapped around her and drying her hair.
[Tommie Sparks]
Hey, what's wrong?
[Colt Kawaii]
Still too small! Want to get bigger, so can fight better. Ladies
here much much bigger than Colt!
[Tommie]
{Shakes her head} It's not the size of the dog in the fight, Colt,
it's the size of the fight in the dog.
[Colt]
Pardon? I no understand ...
{Kelly Tucker pops up, taking a break from the monitor.}
[Kelly]
What she means, Colt, is: (Switches to fluent Japanese to finish
the sentence}.
[Colt]
Oh! Yes, yes, I understand! You have much fighting dog in you,
Tommie! We watch from back {points at the monitor} and see you
there, fight Tiger Z, fight the Dragon! Very much dog in you!
{Tommie giggles while blushing some}
[Kelly]
Er. That's "Heart", Colt. She's got a lot of "Heart" in her.
[Colt]
Oh, very sorry. Very much heart in you?
{She looks to Kelly for approval.}
[Tommie]
Hey, don't sell yourself short (pause, wince, continues} ...
You're the first one that jumped 'em in there. That took a whole
lot of guts. But two on one ...
[Colt]
{nods} Two on one no fair. Lots of heart, but not fair.
[Kelly]
{smiling} Well, why don't you two team up?
{The two give Kelly a questioning look.}
[Kelly]
Work together. You're both dynamite in the ring, but nobody can
ask you to beat two people alone. Watch out for each other, and
that makes it two on two.
[Tommie]
{nods} Lock-up fair? Two on two's just like one on one, and those
are odds I can stand.
[Colt]
{grins} Hey, we like posse! Get all up after desperadoes, yes,
onisan?
[Tommie]
{smirks} Something like that.
{Kelly holds her hand out, palm down.}
[Kelly]
In?
{Colt over that one}
[Colt]
{perkily} In!
{Tommie hesitates a bit, then nods, and joins the circle.}
[Tommie]
In.
{The three grin at one another as we fade to ...}
======================================================================
{The sound of whistling wind and the familiar guitar lick of Golden
Earring's "Twilight Zone" accompany the scene of a pair of gloved
hands in front of a black background loading a round into a rifle,
then snapping the chamber shut. The gun turns towards the screen,
and almost at the same time the camera view turns with it, to end up
behind the sight.}
[Music]
It's 2am (it's 2 am)/Fear is gone (fear is gone)
I'm somewhere where/The Gun's still warm
Thinking my connection/Is tired of taking chances
{The black background is interrupted by a roaming "gunsight" view,
within which AWI action can be seen; the sight moves across the
screen, every so often cutting to change directions (and video
footage).}
[Music]: Now I'm steppin' into the Twilight Zone ...
{Sight moves from left to right; Danny Boy McGill cinches the McGill
Leglock on D.A. Bookthrower.}
[Music]: This is a madhouse/Feels like being home ...
{Sight moves from bottom upwards; Robbie Stevens mugs on the mic with
Corey Bonham close in tow.}
[Music]: My feet they can't move/Under moon and star ...
{Sight moves from lower left to center and back to upper left (in a
">" pattern); Reverend Jeremiah James hoists Steve the Insane into a
Cross of Burdens powerbomb onto a table.}
[Music]: Where am I to go Now that I've gone too far ...
{Sight moves from lower right to upper left in broad arc; Tank Bradley
subjects Justice to the Nail in the Coffin.}
[Music]: You will come to know/when the bullet hits the bone.
{Sight moves from left to right, jagging up and down erratically;
Steve the Insane throws Nick Vorpal into a Frontal Lobotomy.}
[Music]: You will come to know ...
when the bullet hits the bone ...
{Cut to a scene of four simultaneous "gunsights" (without the internal
video), converging on slightly wobbly paths towards the lower left
corner. As the four intersect, a loud drumbeat corresponds with the
crack of a gunshot; the screen flashes bright white, then fades into
the logo:
======================================================================
__ __ __ __ ____
=================== /\ \ /\ \ /\ \/\ \/\ _\
/~/\ \~\ /~/ /~/ \ \ \ \ \ \\ \ `\\ \ \ \L_
/ /\ \ \ \/\/ / / / \ \ \ \ \ \\ \ , ` \ \ _\
/_/ \_\ \_\_\/ /_/ \ \ \__\ \ \\ \ \`\ \ \ \L_
=================== \ \___\\ \_\\ \_\ \_\ \___\
\/___/ \/_/ \/_/\/_/\/___/
__|__
/ | \ ___ ____ __ _____ ____
{ /|\ } /'___\ /\ _\ /\ \ /\ __`\ /\ _\
---+-|-O-|-+--- ___ /\ \__/ \ \ \/_\ \ \\ \ \L\ )\ \ \L_
{ \|/ } / __`\ \ ,__\ \ \ _\\ \ \\ \ , / \ \ _\
\__|__/ /\ \L\ \ \ \_/ \ \ \/ \ \ \\ \ \\ \ \ \ \L_
| \ \____/\ \_\ \ \_\ \ \_\\ \_\ \_\\ \___\
\/___/ \/_/ \/_/ \/_/ \/_/\/_/ \/___/
======================================================================
: Rosemont Horizon, Chicago, IL
>>-AERIAL VIEW-<<
{The camera pans over the roaring crowd, obviously hyped up at the
opportunity to be on television, if only on a microscopic scale.}
>>-PRESS TABLE-<<
{Next to ringside, in place of one railing segment, is a broadcasting
table, where sits a lean clean-shaven Hispanic man in a pale blue
casual suit; a burly man with shaggy black hair and mustache wearing
jeans and a "Looking 4 a Fight" souvenir t-shirt underneath a matching
suit blazer; and a smug-looking man with wavy dark-blond hair, a
FOX-TV souvenir shirt with a red slash airbrushed over the "O", and
a denim vest.}
: Justin Escobar "Madman" Mike Marone Chad Swayze
[Justin Escobar]
HEL-LO FANS!!! This is Justin Escobar, this IS _Line of Fire_ and this
is the *A*W*I*!!!
[Chad Swayze]
Do NOT adjust your television sets! We are IN CONTROL, BAY-BEE!!!
[Mike Marone]
Better yet, we're IN TEE-VEE!!! WHOOOHOOO!!!
[Chad Swayze]
That's ON-- oh, heck, I'm drawin' pay again, I can be nice for ONE
night.
[Justin Escobar]
A commendable spirit ... fans, it's been a LONG time, but the AWI is
back in your house for one-of-a-kind action! As you can see, I'm here
with Chad Swayze and Mike Marone in Chicago, Illinois--
[Mike Marone]
Hot dog AND pizza capital of the world! And us, too! This is the
greatest!
[Justin Escobar]
--and we can't afford to hesitate a MOMENT more, because that action
starts RIGHT NOW!
>>-RING-<<
[Rod Allen]
Ladies and gentlemen, the directing board of Allied Wrestling
International asks me to welcome all of you here in Rosemont Horizon
to tonight's edition of the NEW Line of Fire! This -- is -- A-W-I
TWO THOUSAND!!!
{Crowd pops for itself.}
Tonight's first contest will feature, already in the ring, from
Atlantic City, New Jersey, weighing in at two hundred and thirty
pounds ... Frederick Holland! And his opponent -- from the city of
Miami, Florida, weighing in at two hundred and nineteen pounds ...
please welcome to the AWI, WIIILDFIRE JOHNNY RRRRRRAGE!
{"Everybody Get Up" by Five booms over the PA, as Johnny Rage walks
out to a favorable crowd pop (they're generous, it's still the
opening). He walks down to the ring, slapping some hands along the
way, but generally being a bit more serious than when last anyone saw
him.}
[Justin Escobar]: Here he is! The Wildfire! Fans, the list of
accomplishments this young man has had in his career is nothing
short of *phenomenal*: former USeW Television champion,
multiple-time USeW Light Heavyweight champion--
[Chad Swayze]: Yeah, and ZERO TIME anything that COUNTS
champion! That's not an honor roll you're rolling off, Justino,
it's a golden graveyard, baybee!
{After jumping into the ring, he gets the microphone from the
announcer.}
[Rage]
You know ... there are people that know me, and people that don't. For
those that don't, I am "Wildfire" Johnny Rage. I'm part of one of the
bigger families in wrestling. I'm a former USeW superstar and damn
proud of it. I am a multiple title holder in that federation. I am one
of only THREE men to pin Jimmy Lowe cleanly. And I am looking for that
AWI World title.
Now, people may look at me and say, "Isn't he too young to go for the
World title?". I'm 25. I started doing this when I was 10. I'm older
than Danny Boy McGill was when he won the World title.
[Swayze]: Ever notice that all these debutante champion types
come from biiig, oh I'm so impressed "families"? I could have
been champ too if my daddy could throw a little NON-title gold
around ...
[Escobar]: I don't think anyone's going to dignify that level
of accusation with a denial, Chad ...
[Rage]
Then they may look at me and say "Well, he's just a lightheavyweight,
isn't he?". No. I am a wrestler, a wrestler who has been up against
the best and beaten them. I've taken on El Maestro and won, I've
taken on Comanche War Dog and won, I'm one of only three men to take
on Jimmy Lowe and win. I am far more than just a lightheavyweight.
[Mike Marone]: You know, I like this kid, but he sounds a
little too in to the numbers thing. I mean, what if this Jimmy
guy's only FOUGHT three matches?
[Escobar]: I, uh, highly doubt that would be the case, Mike.
[Marone]: Well, I'm just *saying* ...
[Rage]
And then they say "So, he thinks he can just walk in the AWI and take
the gold? He'll be surprised."
[Chad Swayze]: You betcha!
[Rage]
No, I won't. I know the AWI. The AWI has some of the toughest wrestlers
in the World today. And I'll work damn hard to be one of them. But
once I lock my sights on that big gold belt, I pity anyone who stands
in my way. Because nothing can stop a wildfire.
(Rage then throws the mic back to the announcer, who manages to catch
it with a minimum of awkwardness before ducking gracefully out of the
ring. Moments later, the bell rings ...)
[Escobar]: And so it begins -- our first look at this promising
new addition to the AWI roster ...
[Swayze]: Yeah, but just WHAT is he promising? Upset stomachs
for all! I tell you, the only wildfire I'm feelin' at ringside,
a little Zantac'll take care of!
{The pair lock up collar to elbow, but Rage quickly breaks it off with
an elbow jab. Frederic counters with a couple left jabs, but swings wide
with a right hook that Johnny ducks, moving under Holland and standing
back up to back drop Holland to the mat.}
[Marone]: You know, what he was sayin' before about that big
wrestling family ... he ain't kiddin'. If I got the name right,
I tussled with his old man a couple times in years back.
[Swayze]: Oh, really? Where was that, wise veteran?
[Marone]: In a wrestling ring. I think.
{Chad snorts audibly.}
{Holland stands back up, only to get knocked down with a dropkick; Rage
gets back on his feet and uses the time to run to the ropes, returning
just in time to connect with a clothesline as Frederic stands.}
[Escobar]: That I can believe, Mike -- if there's anywhere the
Rage family knows their way around, it's a wrestling ring ...
and I think Frederic Holland is going to believe that soon
enough ...
{Rage gives a couple stomps to Holland, then bends down to pull him
back up, cinching him in a headlock; he grinds the lock for a few turns,
then lets go and scoops Frederic up for a backbreaker. He falls on top
for a cover and gets a short 2 count, but a jab to the head knocks him
off.}
[Escobar]: Johnny Rage going for an early finish, but Frederic
isn't QUITE ready to throw in the towel just yet ...
[Swayze]: Yeah, as *if* ...
[Marone]: Nonono, don't knock it -- you really gotta put in that
effort for the three count ... you know, it keeps the other guy
honest, makes him think about what he's doing -- instead of what
YOU'RE doing, and maybe how he was gonna stop it.
{Both men get to their feet, but Rage gets the jump on Frederic,
stunning him with a punch then scooping him into a bodyslam. He waits
for Frederic to stagger back up, and tosses him with an armdrag, then
heads to climb the corner.}
[Escobar]: Johnny takes to the air -- we may be treated to the
Firebomb press tonight!
[Swayze]: Uh-huh, sure -- look, I read up on this kinda thing,
bein' the official journalistic source of Team Stevens 2000,
and I know: the "Firebomb" is a myth! He NEVER uses it! He's
SCARED of it!
[Escobar]: I don't think that's really the ca-- oh, it looks
like Holland's back on his feet--
{Rage crouches on the top turnbuckle as Holland slowly stands back up,
shaking away the haze; Frederic seems to regain perception just in
time to see Johnny leaping off, scoring a dropkick across the jaw.}
[Swayze]: PSYCH! Nothing BUT feet! That match your notes about
the "Firebomb"?
[Escobar]: Well, no, I suppose it doesn't--
[Marone]: Hey, wow, that's good -- lemme look at your notes,
Chad ... hey, your notes look a lot like an old issue of
Shoot -- how'd you do that?
{Johnny leans down, hooking both of Frederic's arms as he pulls him
halfway to his feet; he then lifts him slightly and spikes him in a
butterfly DDT.}
[Escobar]: Frederic Holland taking just a little bit too much,
too fast -- Johnny Rage is making a cover, and I think he won't
have to wait for a third time!
[Swayze]: Yeah, well, it's one thing to run circles around
Muhamm-I-want-my-Mommy here -- let him try that against the
Tank, and you'll see Firebomb falter under Firepower!
[Marone]: You know, my notes just look like index cards.
>>-SNIPER'S NEST-<<
{The AWI logo appears for a moment on the TeleScape video wall,
then dissolves to a black screen with words wandering past it in
marquee fashion from right to left; a neutral voice on the speakers
repeats the words.}
: Prepare yourselves for an important announcement. This ... is
the Management.
[Escobar]: Eh-- I suppose we're in for a word from the front
offices ... though I really wasn't infor--
[Swayze]: Meet the new boss -- same as the old boss!
{A black man of medium build with a neatly trimmed beard, wearing an
expensive looking business suit strides with an even pace down the
aisle to step up into the Nest.}
[Escobar]: Old words ring true ... fans, it seems we've been
joined by AWI President Daki Chamberlin-- do you know something
I don't, Chad?
[Swayze]: That's the Team Stevens *way*, Justino -- two steps
ahead, three steps with the ladies!
{The TeleScape reverts to the AWI logo, as Daki lifts a microphone.}
[Daki Chamberlin]
I'd like to wish a good evening to all the fans in attendance tonight,
as well as express my gratitude -- my thanks to you, and to all the
fans who continued to support this promotion in arenas across the
country across the past year.
{Muted auto-pop.}
[Daki]
Now, I know, many of you may have little idea who I am ... my name is
Daki Chamberlin, and I *am* the standing President of Allied Wrestling
International. I would like to clarify that, with no confusion: *I*
am the standing President of the Allied Wrestling Board of Directors.
For the past two years, while I was recovering from injuries suffered
at the hands of an AWI competitor -- an employee, then, of this
company -- my son Jamahn has been acting Commissioner of this
promotion in my stead. And I would like to say, he has done an
outstanding job in the spirit of his principles, executing the duties
of position with tact, honor, diplomacy, and showmanship.
{This draws a slightly louder pop in absentia for Jamahn.}
[Daki]
BUT ... but, given time to heal, time to reflect on the nature of
what had happened and what had caused it, I now understand that
mistakes were made. Mistakes were made that can not and will not be
repeated. And foremost among those mistakes is the realization that
this company is not ABOUT my son's principles. It is not ABOUT tact,
about honor, about diplomacy, or showmanship. The AWI is about
BUSINESS ... it is about making *money* ... it is about making ME
money.
{The crowd begins to stir in audible unrest, sensing swerve.}
[Daki]
Therefore, I am retaking a DIRECT hand in the management of this
company, and I will ensure that those mistakes of the past will NOT
happen again. I warned a man once, the man responsible for my
absence: This is the AWI, this is my HOME, THIS IS NOT A DEMOCRACY.
I say that again, and I want every athlete in this company to
understand just what that means.
What it means, is SECURITY. I do not feel the need, like my son
did, to accompany myself to the ring with the protection of
others. The man that did the deed is no LONGER with this company,
you will notice -- because THAT is how a Chamberlin does business.
Henceforth, to lay a hand on a member of the Board, ANY member --
but especially ME -- is to sign your own severance waiver, effective
immediately, NO benefits.
What it means, is HONESTY. I don't make statements, I make promises.
When this organization last broadcast on television, the fans were
promised a series of matches, a series which I will now ensure take
place. Starting *tonight*, the tag team of Looking For a Fight --
Steve the Insane, Joe Walker -- you two will face Perfection in a
Boxer vs. Wrestler match, JUST as the fans expected to see a year
ago. Next week, the four of you will meet AGAIN -- falls count
anywhere, no disqualification, no countout. And one week later, you
will meet a THIRD time, in a match to be decided by the fans who
care enough to call the AWI SpotLine -- 1-900-AWI-RING.
Likewise, the fans were promised a WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP match between
Ken Mischief and Justice ... and THAT match will take place right
here tonight as well!
What it means, is LOYALTY. You will take note, in that same series
of matches, the fans expected to see Kerry Masters and Jerry Straite
face Agony & Ecstasy for their North American tag team championships.
This may have occurred, I was ready to sign those contracts myself
... but it seems that Kerry Masters has his eyes on other prizes,
and so -- well, Kerry, you're going to find we painted over your
parking place this afternoon. Now, Jerry Straite seems to have shown
straying eyes as well ... so, as tonight you receive a World title
bout, so next week you will see HIM defend his North American
championship against a worthy contender ... the Master of the
Northern Lights Suplex, Maurice Jackson!
Finally, what it means, is HUMILITY for those who seem to have
forgotten that they are, in the end, *employees* in the service of
this company ... those who have forgotten their place is to make
money. To make ME money. And in that spirit, I bring to mind a
stack of memorandums from another tag team, Hector Martinez and
Jaysen Michaels -- Intensity. You tell me you want a busier
schedule. You tell me you want more consideration for your
accomplishments. You tell me you want a rematch against the WORLD
TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS, Intensive Care. Very well, Hector, Jaysen ...
next week, I say -- and therefore, I promise -- you will receive
the ultimate in championship consideration. Next week, YOU will
face Scott Bradley and Toshiaki Hasegawa for their North American
Titles, in Masters and Straite's place ... AND you will face Mike
Kirwan and John Smith -- though if you win the first bout, I am
afraid the latter will be *purely* a competitive exercise, non-title.
This matter concludes the Management's business for the day. I now
return you all to your business ... which is MY business ... which is
making ME MONEY. {He begins to step down the platform, stops, and
a hint of a smile crosses his face.} Oh, and -- enjoy the show.
{Daki exits to an enthusiastic, but decidedly mixed response from the
crowd, which seems split down the middle between cheering his match
selections and booing his Gordon Gecko impression.}
======================================================================
COMMERCIAL BREAK
======================================================================
{Fade in to black background with four white "gunsight" circles
converging from the corners of the screen towards the center; when
they completely overlap, the screen flashes white and fades back to
a single black gunsight over a still image of Karl Von Eichmann
grabbing Dave Hatfield by the neck. Red letters dissolve in over the
picture:}
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:: SNAP SHOT ::
:: Liberty and Justice for All? ::
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
{Cut to image of Dave Hatfield, dressed as a WWII German officer with
a big name tag reading "General Eichmann", holding a hardback book and
speaking to an old radio-style microphone.}
[Voice of Ian Pauly]: Few names in the world of wrestling
command the immediate sense of impending dread as 'Dave Hatfield'
-- never the strongest, the swiftest, or the most dangerous man
in our sport, Dave Hatfield nonetheless possesses a singular
talent, to use the term broadly ... there seems to literally be
no act to heinous, no gambit too outrageous for Dave Hatfield to
go through with. Without a doubt, Dave Hatfield is a man without
shame.
{The sound on the video clip cuts in.}
[Dave Hatfield]
{in a very bad German accent} Ackt BIT ZU! I Vill read from zie book
now. Und you vill be Quiet!!! Zie book ist MEIN KAMPF, by Adolf Hitler
SEIG HEIL!
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Dave snaps the book shut with a click of his heels.}
[Dave Hatfield]
Now, Vhat does this mean for me? This means that GERMANY IS THE
GREATEST COUNTRY IN THE VORLD, and you are nothingk! You are the
loiterers that Adolf vas speakingk of! You are lazy loitering
Amerikans who have nothingk to do but (suddenly returns to his normal
voice} cheer for some lame ass wannabe American who comes over here,
steals OUR jobs, and then spouts off about how great his country is.
Eichmann, this is your notice. I'm Dave Hatfield, and I for one say the
buck stops here! You will not steal our jobs, and take our women to
learn German and cook bratwurst for your little German children! You
will not hurt our great American nation, one that was formed from a
hodgepodge of all races, all religions EXCEPT for Germans! We kicked
your country's butt TWICE, rebuilt it twice, and you repay us by
sending us lame asses like Eichmann. I--
{Suddenly, another voice suddenly booms from the PA system.}
[Eichmann]: That ... is ... enough.
{This draws a large crowd pop ...}
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Karl Von Eichmann, growing visibly tense, advances down the ramp
towards the ring, wearing jeans and a "U-CONN Athletics Department"
t-shirt, microphone in hand.}
[Karl Von Eichmann]
Do not put words into my mouth, Hatfield. I have never "spit on"
Germany, and I *do* love the nation of my birth, in spite of her dark
history. But America is the land of opportunity, as much in the sport
of wrestling as anywhere else. I came to this country to pursue my
dreams, as *millions* have before me -- as *your* ancestors did as
well, Hatfield -- to better themselves ... to be free.
{The crowd experiences a warm, fuzzy patriotic rush, and thanks Karl
with cheers.}
[Eichmann]
You say you are an American, and that I am not: but who is out here
dressed like a hate-mongering nightmare, spouting rubbish and bigotry,
and who is out here speaking of freedom and opportunity? *You* should
be ashamed, Hatfield, ashamed at your hatred and your narrow mind.
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
[Dave]
Y'know, maybe I better be quiet. I know from reading history what your
people does to those they perceive to be a threat. If I remember
correctly, there were 6 million "threats" to Germany that-- URGG!!!
{Dave Hatfield is suddenly cut off by Karl rushing into the ring,
lunging straight at his throat and pinning him to the ground ...}
[Justin Escobar]: This is incredible! I don't think I've EVER
seen this man so angry!
[Mike Marone]: Can you believe it? I mean, Hatfield's pushin'
ALL his buttons, and he looked like he was kinda ENJOYIN' it --
that's just sick!
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Karl Von Eichmann stands in the Sniper's Nest with Chad Duncan.}
[Voice of Ian Pauly]: It is inexplicable why any man would seek
to level such abuse upon Karl Von Eichmann, perhaps one of the
purest sportsmen active in Allied Wrestling International ... so
deep this man's love of the game, that he was even willing to
forget the offense paid and bury the proverbial hatchet.
[Karl Von Eichmann]
First of all, Chad, I would like to apologize to Dave Hatfield, the
AWI, and the fans for my actions last week. Hatfield, you are a
hatemonger with a very, very big mouth -- but that is NO EXCUSE for me
reacting the way I did. I pride myself on being a professional, and I
apologize for behaving so unprofessionally. It will not happen again.
If you have a problem with me, Hatfield, I suggest we work it out in
the ring. I would be glad for the opportunity to shut you up -- in the
proper setting.
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Dave Hatfield marches down the aisle wrapped in a gigantic American
flag, heading to the Sniper's Nest.}
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
[Hatfield]
I think it's a spendid thing, to be a True American. You have more
freedom that any other person on the face of this earth. You have the
right to speak your mind, to state your opinion and do so openly
without fear of reprisal. That's what separates the True Americans
from those who aren't, the wannabe's: We know our rights, and we don't
infringe on others. Karl von Nazi obviously doesn't understand that.
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
[Hatfield]
Anyway, I have a match for the pay per view between him and I. If he
wants to be an American, let him get a taste of it. It's under American
Rules.
[Chad]
I've ... not heard of American rules.
[Dave]
Then obviously you're not a True American either, because any True
American know what they are. I'll be handing this to the commish after
I'm done here. If you have a nerve, Kraut, you'll sign it, and then
you'll get your chance to fight me. This time, I punch back.
{The image freezes, and we pull back ...}
======================================================================
{... to reveal the same image on the TeleScape, continuing to pull
back to show a wide shot of the surrounding crowd.}
[Rod Allen]: {overheard from ring} The next contest tonight ...
will be held under "American Rules".
{Back on the Telescape, we cut to a still picture of the American
flag. It's seemingly stapled to a wall, and is unmoving, but the
overall quality of the taping is poor, much like a home video. Off
camera, obviously trying to emulate the voice of James Earl Jones
(and failing) is Dave Hatfield.}
[James, er, Dave]: In times of tribulation, the measure of a
man is how well he faces adversity. When the odds are stacked
against him, if the man has courage, stamina, and a
never-say-die attitude, he can hold his head high, no matter
what happens. The measure of a man is if he can say, without
fail, that he never quit.
America is full of these men throughout history. Patton. Wayne.
Eisenhower. Clinton. These men stuck with their convictions
and, no matter what horrors faces him, kept their composure,
fought throught the pain and the anguish, and never stopped
until the deed was done.
So, in the spirit of the True Americans, we have upcoming the
match between "Mr. American" Dave Hatfield and "Iron Cross"
Karl Von Eichmann. One of these men is a True American, and
the only way this can be shown is by using American Rules. But,
what are these rules?
The only way an American, a NATIVE BORN American, can lose, is
by submission. Non-Americans can lose by normal means, pinfall,
countout, disqualification, submission. Why, many of you ask,
is this limited to only Native Born Americans? Simple.
According to the Constitution, only NATIVE BORN Americans can be
elected President, for fear that non-native born people would
have more of a loyalty to the country that gave them birth than
to America. So, it stands to reason to all good, American People
that only True Americans will ever be President. So only native
born Americans are True. Simple Logic.
>>RING<<
[Rod Allen]
Those are "American Rules" ... and entering first, the challenger
under those rules ... weighing two hundred forty-four pounds, from
Munich, Germany, he is ... KARL -- VON -- EICHMANN!!!
{The crowd begins to cheer heartily as "Voice of America" by Sammy
Hagar fills the air. Karl himself appears at the aisle entrance,
pausing for a moment to take in the cheers; a brief bang of flashworks
goes off, as a pair of flags (German on the left, U.S.A. on the right)
unrolls to flank the entranceway. Karl then jogs down to the ring,
slowing to slap hands with his fans on both sides.}
[Rod Allen]
His opponent tonight, the MASTER of AMERICAN RULES ... weighing two
hundred sixty-five pounds, from Wheeling, West Virginia ... DAVID
HATFIELD!!!
{The crowd begins to boo even before Rod Allen is finished.
"C-O-U-N-T-R-Y" by Joe Diffie plays, and just as the fans begin to
slack from their disapproval, the German National Anthem plays. Dave
Hatfield, dressed in a full NFL-Europe "Rhein Fire" uniform, appears
in the entrance, a sight that restores the intensity of boos. In his
hands are three wrapped presents; a small square object, a long
pole-like one, and a large portrait sized object.}
{Upon entering the ring, he immediately asks for the microphone,
waving off Karl.}
[Dave]
Hold-- hold up there, big guy. Just hear me out before you use those
twisty submission moves on me. I want to tell you something.
I ... Dave Mar--Dave Hatfield, have had an epiphany. For those of you
... hell, to ALL OF YOU in this arena who doesn't have a clue what I
just said, lemme rephrase. I had an eye-opening, attitude changing
experience. I was watching Roswell on television, on one of the
competing networks, and there was a part where Max realized how much
of an idiot he's been. He's ostra-- ostre-- SHUNNED everyone human
around him just because they weren't as special as he was. That just
made me think. Perhaps, JUST PERHAPS, I was doing the same thing.
America was founded by the cursed, the wretched, the poor and
downtrodden, and all of those words describe Germans to a tee. But
that's what America is founded on? What if *I* was the German? Would I
want to be treated like Max treated the humans? NO! Would I get mad
and want to fight back against those superior to me, because of the
way I was treated? YES! Of course, they got their asses beat because
we're superior, but you get my point, Karl. I ... I was being
unAmerican when I acted the way I did towards you, and I -- I'm sorry.
{The crowd begins a "BUUULL-SH*T" chant which is partially silenced
by the sound department.}
[Hatfield]
Now, I realize my saying sorry won't make up for the bad things I've
said to you, and even though you were the one who hit ME first, I
want to give you a few presents to welcome you as an American.
Forgiveness is also a good American trait, and I forgive you for
striking me awhile back. After all, this IS the season of giving, and
I'm giving you forgiveness for your sins AND some nifty presents to
boot? Isn't that nice?
{The chanters in the crowd change gear to "TAKE THEM BACK!", as Dave
hands Karl the small book-sized object.}
[Hatfield]
This is for you. It's a book with the history of America on it, as
well as a full listing of the Declaration of Independence and the
Constitution. I figure since you want to be in America, you might
learn about American history. I hope you enjoy it, and LEARN. That's
the important thing. LEARN about our wonderful culture over here in
the US of A. No need to thank me, Karl, I'm not done yet.
{Dave hands Karl the pole-like present}
This, my new friend Karl, is the American flag, with your very own
flagpole. Since you want so desperately to be an American, you can
show your pride and wave the flag for all to see! BE PROUD of what
you are! SHOW PRIDE, not to be an American wanna-be, but an American
SOON-TO-BE!
{Dave grabs the final object, the large object, and holds it up to the
crowd.}
This .. this is my last present to you. Now, I know that you're
LEARNING to be one of us, and you're PROUD to be an American
Soon-To-Be, but there's another thing you must be aware of. I know
that all of this is so new to you. You've made the transition from
German to American in such a short time, but in all that haste to
change, you must not forget your heritage. You must not forget where
you came from. You must not forget your FAMILY.
So, it took some time. I went on Amazon.com, I went on EBay.com, but
I FINALLY found a copy of your family history, and your VERY OWN
FATHER, GRANDFATHER, together, bought the picture (at no small
expense, I might add) and had it blown up to a full sized picture,
and had it framed in glass and everything. Here you go.
{Dave starts to hand the wrapped picture over to karl, but as Karl
grabs it, Dave pulls it back.}
Well, hold up. You've got the book and the flag in your hands already.
I'll open this up for you, and that way everyone can see this
wonderful family portrait, and appreciate it.
{Dave rips open the wrapping to reveal a OBVIOUSLY doctored picture
of Karl and Adolf Hitler sitting side by side, smiling. The crowd
erupts in a chorus of boos, as Karl steps back in surprise, then
steps forward in obvious anger.}
[Dave]
What're you mad at, YOU FILTHY, STINKING EVIL KRAUT! YOU GET WHAT YOU
DESERVE!!!
{At that, Dave drops the mic, and SLAMS the portrait over the head of
Karl Von Eichman. Karl goes down immediately to one knee, and David
shoulder-shoves him backwards onto the mat, while kicking the picture
(and most of the glass fragments) out of the ring.}
[Swayze]: Yes! Hatfield strikes a blow for freedom! Wha-BAM!
[Escobar]: That you could even preTEND to agree with that man
is-- what is he doing now?
{He then heads for the corner, shouting to the referee and
timekeeper.}
[Escobar]: It's been said before, but I think it bears repeating
-- Dave Hatfield *is* the man with no shame! After that brutal
blow with a glass picture frame, he's actually trying to get the
match *started* -- Von Eichmann is barely back to his feet!
[Swayze]: What, after getting suckered before in three wars,
like any TRUE American is going to let a German sneak-attack him
again?
[Escobar]: Karl von Eichmann would *never* "sneak" attack *any*
opponent, and you KNOW it, Chad!
{The bell rings.}
[Marone]: *Three*?
[Swayze]: Yeah -- the Kaiser, the Fuhrer, and Fahrfenughen!
{Dave Hatfield continues into the corner, climbing through the ropes
and hopping down to the aisle, where he heads back at a brisk walking
pace towards the exit.}
[Escobar]: Hatfield ... Dave Hatfield seems to be *leaving*.
This doesn't make sense, even for him, to viciously assault Karl
von Eichmann and just leave with the job half-finished -- he's
going to get co... oh, no.
[Swayze]: Shhh! Don't spoil the surprise for the kids at home!
[Marone]: Oh, man you've GOT to be kidding me ...
{The camera swings back to the ring, where Karl is looking confusedly
after the disappeared Dave, then back to the referee, then back down
the aisle, realizing what's going on.}
[Escobar]: Fans, after all this, it would seem this 'match',
these 'American Rules' of Dave Hatfield's -- this is just
another despicable mind game to torment Karl! He never had any
INTENTION of fighting a fair match!
[Marone]: I don't think he's ever really fought a *fair* match,
Justin ... 'course, you can take that a lot of ways, too.
{Karl finally motions for a microphone, addressing the aisle.}
[Karl]
Just one minute, please! Dave Hatfield, I never thought it would come
down to this, but I must ask: are you a coward?
{The crowd pops affirmatively at the accusation.}
Do you really expect ANYONE in this arena to believe your self-pitying
act? Turn around and come back down here! YOU are the one who asked
for this special rules match! Are you just going to walk away from it?
{Lengthy pause as Karl waits for Hatfield to appear in the entranceway.
Unfortunately for him, Dave does not appear.}
[Escobar]: This is a travesty ... I can't believe Karl has to
endure this farce.
[Karl]
I know you think you're going to get a win for this in the record
book, but I would like to bring up one point to Tom Neuman and Daki
Chamberlin -- in this so-called "American Rules" match, the only way I
was eligible to win was if Dave Hatfield submitted -- in other words,
if he gave up. After listening to you, Dave, and being disgusted with
you, I can only come to one conclusion: YOU GAVE UP. You gave up on the
fans, you gave up on AWI, and you gave up on any semblance of dignity
you may have had left. Ladies and gentlemen, I ask you: did we not just
hear Dave Hatfield "give up?"
{The crowd rises up in vocal assent.}
[Marone]: Hhheeeyyy ... that DOES make sense, doesn't it?
[Swayze]: You know, you're right -- if it makes sense to Mike
here ... it MUST be wrong! DON'T LISTEN TO IT, TOM!
[Karl]
I put it to Tom that Dave Hatfield has just given up, and with his
submission, I should be declared the winner!
{Referee Tom Neuman glances after the path Dave departed in, looks
over the cheering crowd, turns back to Karl, and shakes his head with
a resigned look.}
[Tom Neuman]
If it was up to me, Karl ... if it was up to me, I'd ring the bell
for you. But ... the rules *clearly* state, Dave Hatfield has to
actually *say* 'I quit' ... I'm sorry, Karl -- my hands are tied.
I'm sorry.
[Marone]: Awww -- oh, well, good try, Karl.
{The crowd gives this decision a major boo. "Hatfield sucks!" chants
can be heard welling up, though at least one row seems to be making
a go at "rulebooks suck".}
[Escobar]: Well, though I *technically* must agree with the
ring official Tom Neuman, I feel it's plain that Dave Hatfield
HAS surrendered this match in spirit.
[Swayze]: Hey, he's still got a shot! He can just sit there
until the time runs out, and then it's a draw, right?
[Marone]: Huh? You WANT to save Karl the 'L'?
[Swayze]: No, *I* want to knock off early to the ol' Roadhouse
and make for some very happy skirts. I figure if Karl's
spending all night crying in there ...
[Karl]
In my own mind, and in my heart, I *know* I won this, Hatfield. This
turned into a battle of wills -- a battle you lost.
{Karl steps out of the ring and leaves down the aisle; Neuman looks
agitated for a long moment, then reluctantly begins a ten-count on
Karl, as the crowd begins a "Hat-Field Quit" chant.}
[Escobar]: Well said, Karl -- and I can guarantee this conflict
isn't over, even if the "match" appears to be. Fans, we'll be
back after this break ... don't go away!
[Marone]: Yeah, or else we'll get counted out, too!
======================================================================
{Wilderness footage is shown, as from a nature documentary; this one
seems to be about life as a cub for lions. The cute little critters
wander around, and play-fight with each other.}
[Narration]: Ever wonder what life was like before civilization?
{Something changes in the demeanor of the two cubs that are playing.
They don't appear to be friendly, anymore. The bigger one of the two
clinches his jaw around the neck of the smaller one, and a spray of
red fills the area.}
[Narration]: It was nasty, brutish, and short.
{The whines of the smaller cub grow louder. Slowly, the cub begins to
lie down, and get quiet. The life can almost visibly be seen to drain
from the cub's eyes.}
[Narration]: Are you ready for what's about to happen?
{The screen goes black, with a just-visible dark grey logo as if
embossed onto the background: "IR8"}
[Narration]: Don't get mad. Get IR8.
======================================================================
COMMERCIAL BREAK
======================================================================
{Fade in to black background with four white "gunsight" circles
converging from the corners of the screen towards the center; when
they completely overlap, the screen flashes white and fades back to
a single black gunsight over a slow-motion image of Robbie Stevens
putting the Wicked Awesome Superkick to Justice. Red letters dissolve
in over the picture:}
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:: SNAP SHOT ::
:: Television Collision ::
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
[Voice of Ellis Hamilton]: You despise him ... you ridicule him
... you hold him in contempt with every fiber of your being ...
and all because, deep down, you don't want to admit, he IS
everything he says.
Horatio Alger never wrote a story more dramatic than the tale
of a young man's climb from the bottommost rungs of our sport,
to the household name on the lips of every athlete, broadcaster,
and fan.
You will insult him, while he lays claim to the highest market
share in sports television today ... you will deride him, while
he and his entourage occupy half of the AWI's top ten each and
every month ... you will laugh at him, while he destroys the
biggest names in this sport today ... but you will never --
*never* -- ignore him.
He needs no mask. He needs no title. He needs no manufactured
image. His name alone is enough to create instant response in
any arena or stadium in this country: he is ... Robbie ...
Stevens.
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
[Robbie Stevens]
Now, I've been waiting weeks for someone in that locker room to step
forward and accept a sure loss at the toes of the Most Feared Foot in
Wrestling, and not a single one of them had the guts ... except Joe
Walker.
[Escobar]: Joe Walker? He wants to fight Joe Walker? But Joe
Walker already HAS a match scheduled tonight ...
[Swayze]: HA! It's genius! I KNEW the Man With the Plan wouldn't
let me down!
[Stevens]
But where Joe had guts ... he lacks in patience. Because, Joey knew
that it was only a matter of time before he got a title shot ... the
problem is, he ran out and signed a match for tonight against that
nice young boy Dom Nightshade.
[Escobar]: "Nice young boy?" The man borders on homicidal!
[Stevens]
Now, we have a problem here. I mean, it would be unfair for him to not
give Joe his title shot. And I have to defend the title tonight, so it
would be wrong to make some other snivelling coward get in the ring
with me when we've got someone who's ready, willing and able to face
the New Jersey Ninja. But, tonight is also the first big match in
Dom's career. And unlike *SOME* people in the back, I'm not afraid of
young wrestlers trying to make a name for themselves, because a few
years ago, I was in that position. So I can't cheat Joe or Dommie out
of their match and I've got to defend this title or the ratings will
go down and you fans will want your money back.
So, being *YOUR* hero, I have a solution that will make everyone
happy. Joey, you and Dom can have your match tonight ... and after
that's over, later in the hour Joey, you get your shot at the TV
Title.
[Escobar]: This is preposterous! Joe Walker deserves a
LEGITIMATE shot at the TV title -- not after he's faced a
character the likes of Nightshade!
[Swayze]: Heyyy, nobody's FORCING Joe to take the match!
[Stevens]
Dom, I wish you luck in your match. Now, I'd hate for this to go say,
20 minutes, because then Joe would tired and I'd feel realllll badddd
about that. And please, don't do anything nasty like say, hit him in
the head with a chair repeatedly. Remember, he has a title match later
on. We don't want *ANYTHING* bad happening to Joe.
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
<>
{Joe Walker sits on a bench being interviewed by Chad Duncan as the
burly kickboxer wraps his hands in athletic tape.}
[Joe Walker]
Robbie Stevens ... as you said, it wasn't too long ago that you were a
young punk getting smeared across the mat, instead of a rich punk with
hired goons to keep you from getting smeared across the mat. So you
might not remember the Enterprise days, when a guy by the name of
Tatsu squeaked by me and took the Television title with him -- the
same TV title, on paper, that you sling around your shoulder every
appearance. Since then, I've had my chance at that brass ring time
and again -- and it keeps just slipping by. I'm not what you'd call a
shy man, Robbie -- I think I could go ten rounds with Mr. Ken
Mischief, or give Old Man Straite a run for his money, or walk into
the ring with Steve and show Intensive Care the kind of beating they
seem to be begging for all the time, and I'm not afraid to say so. But
that TV title of yours ... that's more than just a belt to me. That's
more than just a token trophy.
So what I'm saying, Robbie, is that {standing up} you're DAMN RIGHT WE
HAVE A MATCH TONIGHT!!! Anywhere, anyhow, you just give the word and I
will kick your yellow-striped butt like clockwork. In the ring, outside
in the parking lot, riding a semitrailer down Route 66, strap on a set
of SCUBA tanks and fight out a Jacques Cousteau death match -- I don't
really care, as long as you bring that shiny belt of yours with it.
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{In the ring action, with Joe Walker against Dominic Nightshade. Joe
throws a punch which Dominic ducks, but Joe follows through in his
spin then lunges forward to clothesline Dominic over the ropes as he's
straightening himself up again.
Nightshade slides underneath the ring apron as Joe roars to the crowd
for a bit; Walker climbs out of the ring and hops off the apron, as
Dominic reappears, carrying a board which he does his best to break
over Joe's head.}
[Escobar]: Dominic's back -- and he's got ... it looks like an
old wooden board, maybe from a collapsed barn or something ...
[Swayze]: BAM! He just used it to collapse Joe there to match!
[Marone]: I'm guessing this is bending the letter of the
rulebook, too.
{Dominic picks up the fallen Joe, and scoops him up to drop backfirst
on the ringside railing.}
[Marone]: It's also bending a few bones ...
[Swayze]: You said it! NOW we've got a MATCH, bay-bee!
{He then drags Joe over to the ring corner, bends him down, and
powerbombs him onto the ring steps; this scene is replayed in
triplicate from different angles.}
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Back inside the ring momentarily, Joe unloads with a thrust kick that
knocks Dominic over the top rope again.}
[Escobar]: Curtis Keyes keeping things legal-- and THERE GOES
THE SCARECROW!
[Swayze]: GEEZ! Is this guy dain-bramaged or WHAT? Last time he
put Nightshade out of the ring, the Halloween Man there just
about put the palooka out of this mortal coil, baby! (*pause*)
Not that I'm complaining ... this is one rerun I can watch
again.
{Joe slides under the ropes and out of the ring, stalking after
Dominic. He grabs Nightshade and whips him into the pumpkin cart.}
[Escobar]: I think Joe is set on rewriting the script this
time, Chad ...
[Swayze]: CHANGE THE CHANNELS, QUICK! I can't watch!
{Joe moves in, scooping up Dominic for a pumphandle slam onto the
cart.}
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Inside the ring, Joe picks up Dominic rebounding from the ropes and
spins him into a tilt-a-whirl inverted atomic drop, which is also
given the triple-replay treatment; he's then shown pulling Dominic up
and scoring a heart punch, falling on top for a pin.}
[Escobar]: Walker delivers a potential finishing blow and makes
the cover -- one! Two! THREE!!!
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Joe Walker throws a clothesline against Robbie Stevens from off the
ropes, but Robbie ducks and dropkicks Joe from behind. Joe hits the
mat facefirst; Robbie begins stomping on his back.}
[Justin Escobar]: This is just *vicious* ... Robbie Stevens
certainly was watching Joe's match with the "Scarecrow" VERY
carefully tonight, and he's ready to capitalize on the damage
done before!
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Joe cuts off a running Robbie with a roundhouse kick to the gut;
Robbie's stunned for a moment, but he recovers quickly enough to jab
Joe in the eyes, then bounces off the ropes again, and dropkicks Joe
in the back.}
[Chad Swayze]: This is going to be a great night in wrestling
history, Justino ... we already knew that Joe Walker was
spineless--
[Escobar]: Now, just a minute--
{Robbie delivers an exaggerated elbow drop to the small of the back
while Joe is down.}
[Swayze]: but after Robbie's done tonight, we can get *medical
certification* that he has no backbone! HAHAHAHA!
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Robbie adopts an exaggerated karate pose for a long moment before
delivering a savate kick.}
[Escobar]: I think Robbie's convinced Joe's through--
[Swayze]: He will be after this-- BOOM! HAHA! The Wicked Awesome
Superkick takes another victim! The New Jersey Ninja makes
another brilliant title defense!
{Robbie covers Joe, but the referee breaks off before the count as Joe
slides a foot onto the ropes.}
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Joe whips Robbie into the ropes, and spins him around on the rebound
with a tilt-a-whirl inverted atomic drop. He drops to his knees
afterwards with a tired expression, then makes a "wear the belt"
gesture for the fans.}
[Escobar]: CASTIGO! Joe takes Robbie out for a spin, and he
seems ready to end this match!
[Swayze]: You mean, he IS going to throw in the towel, right?
[Marone]: Maaaybe you should turn around for a few minutes.
{Joe drags Robbie back to his feet, and bends his arm behind his head
in preparation for the heart punch; Robbie manages a knee lift to the
groin to save himself.}
[Escobar]: Here's the finis-- NADA! Robbie keeps himself in the
game with a cheap shot below the belt!
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Joe has Robbie in an armbar/shoulderclaw combination, which Stevens
breaks with a poke to the face; he gets up as Joe recoils, rubbing his
eyes.}
[Escobar]: Robbie again resorts to a flagrant violation of all
the rules of sportsmanship to save his skin ...
{Joe manages to shake off the daze before Robbie is fully up, and
grabs him around the back, lifting him up for a powerbomb that lands
headfirst instead.}
[Escobar]: ... but Joe seems more hot than hurt -- and he drops
Robbie with a Poppabomb!
{Replay of the Poppabomb impact from a closer camera angle.}
[Swayze]: Oh, and stealing moves IS sportsmanship?
{Joe drags Robbie back up, and whips him to the ropes, catching him
with a tilt-a-whirl inverted atomic drop. He does a goofy mime of
Robbie's characteristic karate pose, then pulls Robbie up and sacks
him with a heart punch.}
[Escobar]: Joe Walker showing off a little of his own martial
arts experience ... and he connects with a solid heart punch!
This could be for all the marbles -- ONE! TWO! THREE!!!
{Replay of the heart punch and cover in black and white footage.}
[Escobar]: HE DID IT! WE HAVE A NEW TELEVISION CHAMPION!!!
{Slow motion shot of Joe rolling out of the ring and lifting the belt
overhead.}
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Robbie Stevens and Corey Bonham are dressed in labcoats, standing in
front of a large-screen TV on a pushcart.}
[Robbie Stevens]
Before we get under way ... {cranes his neck} OW! As some of you have
noticed, I am minus my title belt. However ... this is something that
will be corrected very shortly. We have brought out this VCR for two
reasons tonight ... OW!
[Swayze]: What a trooper ...
[Marone]: Gee, am I the only one here who doesn't speak German?
[Robbie]
The first of which is this following clip. You people can watch the
jumbo-tron to see what I'm talking about. Corey, press play.
{A clip rolls from the title match on the last Line of Fire -- Joe
Walker has lifted up Robbie and gives him a Poppabomb.}
[Robbie]
Now ... any wrestling fan worth their salt knows that the piledriver
is banned in Tennessee. Now I don't know about you ... but that sure
as heck looked, and trust me, it felt, like a piledriver. So ...
Joe-Joe Walker, the Athletic Commission is calling ... and it's
saying that you should have been disqualified on the spot and the TV
title should be handed back to the true champion, not some CHEATER
like you, Robbie Stevens ... thank you!
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Robbie is facing down Joe Walker and Kerry Masters before their match
at Danse Overture.}
[Robbie]
Now, Hugo can say otherwise ... OK, Hugo's "Reading Is Fundamental"
drop-out thug can say otherwise, but the fact of the matter remains,
I am the TV Champion. And in a bit of irony, you share something with
Mr. Slade, Jojo. No, not poor reading skills ... no, not bad body odor
... but a criminal past!
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
[Robbie]
Now Joe, we can do this one of three ways. One is you hand me back
the belt, you cop a plea and you maybe you'll get 5 ... 6 years
tops ... two is, I press charges you, get 50 to life with no parole
... and three is I get in the ring with you in my next title defense
and I kick you so hard, I knock your hair onto baldylock's head over
there and then you get sent up the River anyway.
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
[Robbie]
Now, since I'm in a sporting mood, I declare this a number one
contenders match ... whoever wins gets a shot against me and MY TV
title on an upcoming show. And Joe, watch yourself, because Masters
isn't a bastion of fair play like yours truly ...
{The screen image freezes ...}
======================================================================
{... and we pull backwards from the TeleScape before panning over to
the aisle entrance, to the sounds of "Way Cool Junior" by RATT, mixed
with intense boos from the crowd. Corey Bonham and Robbie Stevens
appear from behind the curtains, making to their way to the ring with
usual self-satisfied swagger.}
[Justin Escobar]: Welcome back, fans!
[Chad Swayze]: Yeah, baby, yeah! The NJN now rules Chicago!
You all saw it minutes ago, a testament to the Greatness!
[Mike Marone]: What I *saw* was your bossman getting his butt
kicked by Joe.
[Swayze]: Hey, man, I only watch the GOOD parts on TV. That's
the way to be happy ...
>>RING<<
: "Tsunami" Scott Deda (w/"The Wrestling Expert" Ed Carr)
{Ed is standing on the apron in Scott's corner, pointing at the
incoming pair momentarily as he speaks to Scott.}
[Escobar]: Somehow, I believe that, Chad ... well, it looks
like Ed Carr is giving some last-moment advice to his
younger protege, Scott Deda ...
[Swayze]: Hold on, Justino, I think I can handle this one --
"He beat you last time, punk, he'll beat you again! Run now
while you still got a chance! It's what I'd do!"
[Marone]: Well, actually, sometimes Ed's waited until he
DOESN'T have a chance to try running ... actually, that got
kinda interesting. Don't think it'd work for Scott, though.
{The bell rings, and Scott rushes Bonham; he gets the jump on
Corey with a snap kick to the abdomen, then knocks him down with
a thrust kick. He drops to the mat, flipping Bonham over for a
wakigatme armbar.}
[Escobar]: I think Scott's got a fair idea on his own of
how to approach Corey, and it DOESN'T involve running.
Deda in fact looking a bit more aggressive than the last
time we saw him.
[Marone]: Maybe that's not a bad idea -- keep on him hard
enough, and he might not have enough time to ask Robbie to
cheat for him.
[Swayze]: WHAT? You take that back!
[Marone]: Oh? Yeah, right, sorry. Robbie does do a lot of
pro bono cheating, too, doesn't he? Guess Corey doesn't
have to ask.
[Swayze]: THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!!!
{Corey pushes himself back onto his back to break the hold, then rolls
to his knees; Scott stands back up, grabbing Corey's head for a front
facelock. Corey breaks it up with a lifting chop to the groin.}
[Escobar]: Competent counters from both men -- Corey, of course,
also spent some time at the Carr Academy, whe--NO! I should have
known ...
[Marone]: That's typically something I don't WANNA know, Justin.
{Corey stands up steady, and throws a kick to Scott, who responds with
a snap kick of his own; Corey clips him with a forearm uppercut, then
drives a side kick into his ribs with the heavy (left?) boot.}
[Swayze]: You do what you have to do, Justino! You like to
talk about fair play up here where it's safe -- well, except
when that NUTJOB Steve is around -- but when you're in the
thick of the violence and some lowlife punk is looking to do
you pain, let me tell you, baby, you don't think twice about
what you gotta do to make it through!
[Escobar]: You're saying this from experience AS the lowlife,
I'm sure ...
{Corey scoops Scott up for a bodyslam, and begins stomping away with
him on the ground.}
[Escobar]: Corey has a decided advantage now, and he's not
going to give it up -- he's continually pounding Deda with
that weighted boot he claims is intended as some kind of
orthopedic device ...
[Marone]: I can see why a doctor would want Corey to wear that
-- I think he's tryin' to drum up business.
[Swayze]: I'll have you know, Dr. Quackencrank is a HIGHLY
respected member of the medical community!
{Bonham attempts a kneedrop, but Deda rolls; Corey recovers from the
miss in time to net Scott in a front facelock, getting back to his
feet.}
[Escobar]: This could be a respite for Scot-- no, Corey is
too fast to recover!
[Swayze]: THIS is the kind of high-intensity training you get
from Team Stevens. You don't learn that sort of quick thinking
in a rundown bar, lemme tell ya.
[Marone]: But you do get beer.
[Swayze]: What does that have to do with anything? I'm talking
about state-of-the-art Team Stevens tactical knowledge here!
[Marone]: I'd rather have the beer.
{Keeping a hold of Scott, he kicks him in the ribs, then turns
around and throws him headfirst into the turnbuckle. As Deda staggers
back, shaking off the daze, Bonham scoops him up from behind and drops
him bellyfirst on one knee. He covers: 1 ... Scott breaks.}
[Swayze]: See, Corey's SMART. He's gotta put in these falls when
it's still early, to keep Scott from thinking about what he's
*doing*, see, it's--
[Marone]: Hey, man, you've already blown it -- don't, just don't.
{Both men get to their feet, and Scott snaps a kick at Corey, who
responds almost reflexively with a stiff thrust kick using the hard
boot.}
[Escobar]: Scott kicking back--
[Swayze]: WICKED AWESOME, BAYBEE!
[Escobar]: Corey just SPIKES Scott Deda with the superkick, and
Scott is down!
[Swayze]: One, two, three, that's all she wrote -- PARTYTIME!
{He drops for another cover: 1 ... 2 ... the referee makes a slap
of three as Scott twists to the side, then he holds his hand in the
air to indicate "2".}
[Marone]: Party's over. Was it catered?
[Swayze]: New Japanese phrase, Mike: shuttu uppu.
{Corey locks Scott into body scissors.}
[Escobar]: It's not hard to tell, Corey looks *very* frustrated
with that result -- he does not want this match to linger on
long enough for Scott to enjoy a second wind ...
[Marone]: See, now if he had a beer, he could drink it, and then
he wouldn't be so frustrated.
{Corey releases his legs, and reaches to rake Scott across the face;
Scott grabs him by the wrist, and smacks him in the nose with a palm
thrust.}
[Marone]: Oh, yeah, man, smack him!
[Swayze]: HEY! That nose ain't insured!!!
{He stands up, pulling Bonham with by the wrist, then tugs him in
close and grabs his head for a DDT.}
[Swayze]: AAGH! You jinxed him, Justin! And you call yourself
an unbiased journalist!
{Scott does a forward roll over the arm he's holding, then twists to
the side, ending up in a wakigatme armbar.}
[Escobar]: We'll call it a fortunate prognostication and leave
it at that.
[Swayze]: {exaggerated whisper} jiiinnxx ...
[Escobar]: WHATEVER the reason, Scott Deda is making the most
of his advantage, returning this match to a more methodical
pace -- perhaps trying to reduce Corey's lifting power arm by
arm to dull his power arsenal, a surprising asset of Robbie's
protege.
{Corey does a half-pushup to roll Scott off him, but Deda keeps a
hold of the wrist as he gets back to his feet; he whips Corey into the
ropes, dashing to the opposite side himself. As they cross paths
again, Deda leaps into a bodypress; Corey manages to roll him off
before the referee can start the count.}
[Escobar]: Bonham trying his best to break this hold -- but
Deda turns that to his advantage as well, and -- WE'VE GOT A
FALL -- no, Bonham out quickly! But Deda has "Way Cool Jr."
completely off-balance right now!
[Marone]: And with no beer.
[Swayze]: He's NOT off-balance, man, he's just weeeeeaving
his way through the battleplan! See, it's all about surprise
and secrecy ... Corey's leadin' him into a trap, and then
BAM!
[Marone]: I get it -- after Deda pins him, he won't be
expecting Corey to hit him anymore, right?
[Swayze]: Ri--WRONG!!!
{Scott stands up and quickly wraps Corey into a crooked headscissors
lock, as Robbie starts to climb onto the apron. Robbie yells at the
referee, who moves over to (apparently) keep Robbie from entering.}
[Escobar]: Scott Deda has him trapped! Corey is reaching for
help, and there's nothing and no one within reach -- he's
submitting! He's giving up the match!
[Swayze]: I don't see anything like that -- what are you
looking at?
[Escobar]: You can see it right there on your monitor-- but
Brandie Mulroney can't! She's too busy trying to get Robbie
out of the way!
[Swayze]: Nope, no submission here, nothing doin', Team
Stevens NEVER quits, baby ...
[Marone]: He's doing that on purpose, Justin.
{Ed Carr manages to get Brandie's attention and wave her towards
the action; unfortunately, by this time Corey has given up on giving
up, so to speak, and instead manages to crawl to the ropes.}
[Escobar]: Unbelievable ... even with Ed Carr trying to keep
things even, ONCE MORE Robbie Stevens has managed to subvert
the rules of fair competition to protect his side!
[Swayze]: You know what they say -- it's not whether you win
or lose, it's how you play, right?
[Escobar]: Uh, right ... but--
[Swayze]: Well, Robbie plays TO WIN!
[Marone]: That was a trick question, right?
{Scott releases the hold, but punishes Corey with an axe kick after
standing up. Corey replies with a punch to the groin, getting back
to his feet, then lifts Scott into a gutwrench suplex as he's
doubled over.}
[Marone]: Man, Scott's just really *not* on his game today --
one sucker punch, and he's thrown off track for a whole minute.
I KNOW it sucks to get decked like that, but against guys like
that, you gotta learn to TAKE the cheap shots when they're
coming your way and get on with it ... cause they're NOT gonna
skip 'em.
[Swayze]: That's just what I've been saying! Corey's been
taking every cheap shot he can, and look at him go!
[Marone]: {hoarse sigh} That's NOT what I said ...
{Corey hops on Scott's chest with a double stomp. He makes a "hang
loose" sign with his hands, swaying in a sideways motion, while Deda
staggers back to his feet.}
[Escobar]: Oh, no -- Bonham's feeling confident enough to
signal his intentions ...
[Swayze]: I think Tsunami's gonna ride a DIFFERENT wave
tonight!
{Bonham then lifts Deda onto his shoulders and drops down into a
fireman's carry brainbuster. He falls on top for the cover.}
[Swayze]: S-F-D, 1-2-3!
[Escobar]: Deda takes the full impact of the San Fernando
Valley Driver -- and sadly, this does look like a three count!
Remember, though, aficiandos, this match was STOLEN from
Carr's protege by meddling from *Robbie Stevens*! Corey Bonham
clearly pitched in the match under Scott Deda's crooked
headscissor lock!
[Swayze]: Yeah, right, back and to the left -- we've heard the
crazy theories, but this is the TRUTH, baybee!
======================================================================
COMMERCIAL BREAK
======================================================================
{Cut to the lockers, where Steve the Insane is seated on a bench,
intently studying the Big Big Book of Wrestling Moves. Behind him, Joe
Walker can be seen, doing alternating leg split sit-ups with a barbell
behind his neck.}
[Steve the Insane]
Hrmm, let's see ... apply a front facelock, throw his arm across my
shoulders, hook his leg, pick him up, drop him on his head ... cool!
{looks up toward the camera} Oh, hi. I just wanted to get some last
minute studying in, 'cause, see, I'm a wrestler .. R-E-S ... um ...
well, however the hell you spell it, I'm a wrestler, no gloves for me.
See, I can prove it.
{Steve reaches down into the gym bag sitting at his feet and rummages
for a moment. Joe Walker pauses his exercises for a moment, leaning
back against the lockers.}
[Joe Walker]
Wishful thinking, bud -- they're not gonna go for it.
{Steve pulls out a t shirt. On the t shirt is a logo consisting of a
wrestling ring and the letters "SIPW".}
[Steve]
{holding up the shirt} See -- "Steve's Institute of Professional
Wrestling". We're currently accepting applicants ... call
1-800-INSANE1. {to Joe} Hey, if the little guy gets to plug his
school all the time ...
[Joe]
{shakes head with a chuckle} The "little guy" is prolly kickin'
back something to the ad department. {stands up} I don't think
you have to worry much about them gloves, though, Steve -- if
anything, Kim and Jill did us a *favor* picking the match they
did. {turns to camera} It's real simple -- Steve and I have
already *seen* what you two can throw down as *wrestlers* ...
and all I can say is, I'm a HELL of a lot better boxer than
you'll EVER be as wrestlers. So that's one for our side.
And of course, we've already seen how you two can -- or rather,
can't -- throw down in a no holds barred brawl like WE lined up
for YOU ... nowhere to run, nowhere to hide, just me in front
of you and Steve on the other side. And that's where the REAL
fight begins ...
{Steve looks up from his book with a gleam in his eye not unlike
that of a small child on Christmas morning.}
[Steve]
Wait ... that's /tonight/?!?
[Joe]
Uh, no, actually it's nex--
[Steve]
{tosses the book over his shoulder} Then I guess I won't be
needing this for awhile.
{Steve hops off the bench and departs to one side of the screen,
as Joe shrugs with a roll of his eyes, turning back to the
camera.}
[Joe]
{muttering} Once that guy gets started ... {more direct} I think
everyone knows that Joe's been taking it easy for the past few
months -- keeping his cool, holding up that good humor, trying to
be a good boy for the ticket-buying children of the world ... but
that WON'T LAST FOREVER! TONIGHT, I play it fair, Marshal
Queensbury and everything. NEXT WEEK, Perfs, when the bell rings
-- ALL the RULES take a HIKE, and the two of YOU get chewed
through the most jagged, rusty, painful meat grinder of your
California sun-baked LIVES!
{As Joe speaks Steve tosses out various boards, chairs, a roll of
barbed wire, etc, occasionally commenting -- "Need a couple of
these ... definitely need this ..".}
[Joe]
What I'm trying to say, Perfection, is that I just gotta level with
you here: YOU CAN'T BEAT US. You can try every trick in the book,
you can use every slick move you know, you can talk all cool-like in
stereo -- and it ain't gonna change the fact that I *AM* the hardest
working man in this league, twenty-five hours a day eight days a week
... and my buddy Steve is the CRAZIEST sumbitch, ANYWHERE ... and
where you are walking, Kim and Jill, is where insanity is king.
[Steve]
{loudly} Oh, /COOL/!
{Steve comes back into view, holding what appears to be a vintage
WWII flamethrower.}
[Steve]
Hey, Joe, can we use this? Can-we-can-we-can-we? I've been good
lately ...
[Joe]
{grins at Steve} I rest my case.
======================================================================
>>AERIAL<<
{"Perfect Strangers" by Deep Purple begins to play on the PA, and the
crowd starts to voice its disapproval, as Perfection appears walking
down the aisle to the ring.}
[Escobar]: It's time for our next match -- as mandated by our
newly reactivated commissioner Daki Chamberlin, this will be a
Boxer vs. Wrestler match -- which means that while Perfection
can win by any of the usual ways, Steve and Joe have to fight
and win--
[Swayze]: You mean, fight and LOSE.
[Escobar]: --as boxers, meaning a ten-count knockdown.
{The TeleScape image switches from the parrot of the camera view at
home to a cinema-style countdown -- as it reaches "4", an animated
fist bursts out from behind, and letters drop into place from all
sides to complete the "Looking/4/A Fight" logo. This pixel-dissolves
to a closeup view of a man in a gold-glitter lucha libre mask.}
[Man]
{vaguely spanish accent} PLLLAY SOMETHING FOR US, JOHNNY!
{The man steps off to the left, revealing the scene to be a garage
of some sort, with a rock band set dressed in grunge denims and
t-shirts, (except for the apparent bassist in back, instead sporting
a gigantic B-movie robot suit). The man in the center, though carrying
a guitar slung on a strap over the shoulder, is currently holding a
trumpet with which he begins to play the opening notes of "Gonna Fly
Now (Rocky's Theme)", soon joined in by spirited accompaniment from
the other guitarists.}
[Swayze]: What the HELL?
>>AISLE<<
{The crowd begins to cheer madly as Steve the Insane (in a black
singlet with blue "SIPW" lettering on the front) and Joe Walker (in
blue boxing trunks; both men are wearing black and blue headgear) jog
down to the ringside, with Angela Dante walking not far behind. Steve
is carrying a book under one arm, and a wheeled garage can full of
junk under the other. They pause halfway down the aisle to point at
the TeleScape, encouraging the crowd to cheer for the garage band
music before continuing to the ring.}
[Escobar]: {chuckling} The AWI makes friends all over the world
... and some right at home! This is Juan Violentes y Los
Huracarans d'Amor -- fans on the Internet can find their latest
work available at www.mp3.com!
[Swayze]: You've got to be-- dude, if ROBBIE was runnin' this
show, it'd be a-list acts all the way, baybee! Poison! Warrant!
Whitesnake! Skid Row!
[Marone]: You keep telling us Robbie DOES run the show.
[Swayze]: Hey, that's the front office and the lockers -- the
sound department, they're like their own PLANET, man.
{The two get inside, and Steve the Insane rushes Perfection, knocking
both members down with a double clothesline. Kim takes the chance to
roll out of the ring, as the referee stops Steve from continuing the
attack, taking him and Joe back to a corner.}
[Chad Swayze]: Now what does THAT have to with boxing?!?! Call
the DQ, Tomasino, this match is OOO-ver!
[Justin Escobar]: Technically, the match has yet to BEGIN, Chad.
[Swayze]: Oh, you're always so worried about the little things,
man. RING THE BELL!
[Escobar]: Tom Neuman, our ring official, is making sure
that Looking For a Fight stays within a reasonable facsimile of
the rules tonight ... and it looks like Joe Walker will be
staying in the ring for the team.
[Swayze]: Whereas Steve should be staying in a rubber room,
comprende??? Who keeps a FLAMETHROWER in their LOCKER?
[Marone]: I'm sure he has a license for it.
{Jilliam starts by pulling Joe into a headlock; Joe quickly punches
out, then starts laying into Bole with jabs, driving him back to the
corner. Jilliam kicks him away, then whips him into the ropes, before
tagging in Kim. Joe surprises Kim with a backspin punch on the rebound,
and stuns Jilliam with a quick hook; an uppercut knocks Kim to the
floor.}
[Escobar]: Joe wasting NO time in doing what he does best!
[Marone]: Is that the streetfighting or the kickboxing?
[Swayze]: What he does BEST is steal title belts from deserving
champs! But Team Stevens hasn't forgotten, JoJo -- the Most
Feared Foot In Wrestling will have his belt BACK!
[Marone]: Um, belts go on waists, not feet, Chad.
{The referee counts up to 5 before Kim gets back to his feet, looking
rather angry; Joe moves in and throws a body blow, then starts
jabbing him back into the corner. Kim blocks a punch, and swings out
a kick which Joe ducks, then Joe begins laying into Kim with hard gut
punches.}
[Escobar]: We might just have a knockout already -- no, Kim
refuses to go down that quickly, and he's the dictionary
definition of "piqued" right now.
[Marone]: That's not how I would have pronounced it.
[Escobar]: But pique alone won't save him from Joe's assault!
[Swayze]: No, it won't, which is why Kim's a kung fu fightin'
ferocious tiger!
[Marone]: Who missed.
[Swayze]: Who -- no, I am NOT falling for THAT again!
{Kim rolls out to the side, Joe spins around and nails a left hook,
then a backspin fist. He follows this up with more jabs.}
[Marone]: You know, in one way, this is a smart move by
Perfection, because those gloves on Joe prevent him from doing
anything really fancy, like picking up a crowbar ... on the
other hand, Joe's kinda GOOD at boxing, you know?
{Kim manages to legsweep Joe to the mat, then drops to one knee to
slap on a clawhold.}
[Swayze]: YES! Let's see him try and Muhammad Ali his way out
of THIS, bay-bee! Now we're going to see some REAL wrestling!
>>RINGSIDE<<
{At the corner, Steve can be seen rummaging through his can of stuff,
pulling out a nail-studded board; he looks into the ring, looks back
at Angela (shaking her head disapprovingly), then sighs and stuffs
it back in the can.}
>>RING<<
{Joe bats off the claw, and headbutts Kim for good measure; as Joe
returns to his feet, Kim takes issue with the referee, who nods
resignedly and delivers a warning to Joe. Kim takes the opportunity
to tag in Jilliam.}
[Marone]: Well, he got out, but Ali would've just talked his
way out, I think. But they both used their heads.
[Escobar]: Unfortunately, Joe's variation on said body part
will cost him a standing 8-count, and he's going to have to
remember the regs if he wants to win this match.
[Marone]: I don't get it. What's wrong with a headbutt?
[Swayze]: This is BOXING, Miko--if it don't have a glove,
you don't use it!
[Marone]: Well who came up with THAT stupid rule?
[Escobar]: It's the stipu--
[Swayze]: Forget it, Justino -- light from Alpha Centauri will
reach us before you'll reach him. The important thing is, now
Jilliam the Just is in the ring, and he's gonna knock Joe TO
Alpha Centauri ... luckily, Robbie's title will still be here
on Earth, tho.
{Jilliam hops into the ring, right into a flurry of punches from
Joe. He gets busted back into the ropes, and decides to dump Joe
over the top rope with a backdrop.}
[Marone]: He's got a funny way of doin' space travel.
[Swayze]: It's a methodical thing with Perfection. They just
have to get warmed up.
[Escobar]: Apparently, Jil feels it's warmer on the outside
of the ring -- such tactics HARDLY surprising.
{Kim hops off the apron outside, and roundhouse kicks Joe, just
before Jilliam leaps off the apron for a moonsault ... they then
grab Joe by each arm, and attempt to irish whip him into the apron,
but Joe gets his feet up on the apron's edge, and pushes off into
a swinging kick that takes both Perfection members down.}
[Escobar]: Lee joining back in to continue the punishment on
the outside -- Jilliam SKYWARD, and that moonsault took down
Walker in a BIG way!
[Swayze]: See the genius of Perfection? They've taken what's
usually home turf for Looking For A Clue, and turned it into
No Man's Land!
[Escobar]: And they send Joe into the apron -- NO! Joe turns
it around on them with an INCREDIBLE swinging kick! All three
men are on the ground now, but it looks like Joe's going to
get up first!
{Joe slides back into the ring, and tags in Steve. Jilliam returns
inside, and catches Steve with a dropkick; Steve's back on his feet
quickly, but Bole turns him into a spinning wristlock.}
[Escobar]: The Insane One tags in, and the crowd here is
ready for some Insane Action! Jilliam cuts off Steve, however,
and he's slowing things down before trouble starts.
[Swayze]: The perfect plan, naturally ...
[Marone]: I would think a perfect plan would involve not
getting in a ring with that guy. I mean, I wouldn't, and we're
sorta friends, y'know?
{Steve backs into the ropes, holding them for leverage as he starts
to kick away at Bole to break the hold; he then nails a clubbing
punch, bounces off the ropes, and knocks down Jilliam with a running
punch.}
[Swayze]: HEY! That's NOT real boxing!!!
[Escobar]: Well, it's not exactly /not/ boxing, either --
Steve bringing a somewhat unorthodox Yappian style to the ring
here, but Neuman seems inclined to let it pass.
[Swayze]: Pass, my --
[Escobar]: TV-13?
[Swayze]: --word for it would have been "he's biased!!"
{The referee gives Jilliam an 6-count, before he gets back up. Steve
moves in quickly with another pair of stiff punches, but Jil shoves
him back, then dropkicks him. Both men stand up, and Jilliam pulls
Steve over in a hiptoss; he then scrambles to tag in Kim, who steps
in quickly to deliver roundhouse kick to Steve before he can get back
fully to his feet.}
[Escobar]: Bole slow to return to his feet after that one, but
the referee's count finally brings him upright ... and Jil
thinks fast to keep from heading right back down.
[Swayze]: That's Bole -- quick thinking, quick moving, quick
winning!
[Escobar]: Bole now able to make the tag to Tiger Lee, and
Lee wasting no time in moving onto offense.
[Marone]: Mostly cuz he has to. If you DO waste time against
Steve, you end up on DEFENSE.
{Steve shakes off the kick almost immediately, and begins throwing
wild punches into Kim; he turns around to make a tag to Joe, but
Kim grabs him and sends him to the mat with a legwheel throw.}
Pulling Steve back up, Kim whips him to the ropes; Steve surprises
him with a boot kick on the return, but Jilliam hops over the ropes
to knock Steve down with a dropkick. Steve and Jilliam get back up,
and Steve starts laying punches into Bole, only to get a roundhouse
kick to the back from Kim.}
[Escobar]: Two on Insane one situation now, and there's very
little he can do about it -- referee Tom Neuman is moving in
to restore some order, but Perfection will do as much damage
as they can manage before giving in!
[Marone]: That's OK -- I know Steve's been in worse places
before. When you go into a tag team match, you pretty much
EXPECT to get pounded on like this -- but it takes a LOT more
pounding than this to put Steve out of it.
{Neuman orders Kim out of the ring; as the Tiger complies, his
partner throws a headlock on Steve, then backs him into Perfection's
corner; Kim slides under the ropes to sweep Steve's legs, which Jil
turns into a sort of standing bulldog.}
[Swayze]: HA! This shows that even if you CAN stop Perfection,
you can't HOPE to contain them!
[Marone]: Huh?
[Escobar]: Whatever he said, Perfection *does* seem to be in
control at this point, and Joe seems itching to get back into
the ring.
{Jilliam sends Steve to the ropes, bounces off the opposite side
himself, and this time connects with a bulldog lariat. He rolls
over to grab Steve for an armlock, but Steve headbutts him off
before he can secure it, then cuffs him across the jaw. Steve
moves to his corner and tags in Joe, who steps in quickly to
batter Jilliam before Bole can reach his own corner.}
[Escobar]: Steve seeming increasingly frustrated with
his situation -- but he finds a creative way out ... and
he makes the tag!
[Swayze]: He should have gotten a warning!! No headbutts!!
[Escobar]: I think the ref missed it, Chad --
[Swayze]: Because he's BIASED!!
[Marone]: Man, everything is bias with you.
[Swayze]: Hey, one of my jobs as Team Steven's official
journalistic correspondent is to root out the massive
anti-Robbie conspiracy! I think I've found a key figure right
there in the ring!
[Marone]: But Perfection's not part of --
[Escobar]: Let it go, Mike ...
{Jilliam breaks the punch combination with a hiptoss, then
steps over to goad Steve, who begins to scramble into the ring;
the referee interposes himself as Jilliam whips a standing Joe
into the ropes. Kim hops into the ring to join Jilliam, and the
two flip Joe over with a tandem backdrop.}
[Escobar]: And Jilliam getting under Steve's skin, who
unfortunately plays right into their hands ... and a tag
team back body drop.
[Swayze]: Not just ANY drop, Justino -- a PERFECT tag team
backdrop!
[Marone]: Bayer, please?
>>RINGSIDE<<
{Outside, Steve is once again considering his hardcore options,
this time studying a lumberjack saw. Angela again gives him the
"dressing down" look, and he rolls his eyes, tossing the saw back
in the barrel before stepping back up to the corner to start
cheering Joe on.}
[Swayze]: You know, this is like watching one of those
horror movies where you just KNOW something bad is gonna
happen but the referee is too stupid to stop it first!
[Marone]: A lot of referees in those horror movies, huh?
>>RING<<
{Jil pulls Joe back up and bodyslams him back down, then drops
to one knee to apply a hammerlock.}
[Escobar]: Perfection obviously deciding not to press
their luck, slowing things down again.
[Marone]: And, I hate to admit, taking out Joe's
punchamajigs in the process.
[Swayze]: "Punchamajigs?"
[Marone]: Boxing stuff. Sweet science. It's technical.
{Bole lifts Joe back up by his arm, and pushes him into the
Perfection corner; Kim tags, and throws a high roundhouse kick
over the ropes, but Joe ducks and Jilliam takes it instead. Kim
ducks into the ring, and Joe cuts him short with a series of
punches, two lefts and a right hook; Kim backs away into center
ring quickly.}
[Escobar]: Jilliam taking Joe to the corner for some more
tag-team punishment -- but NO! It's Jil who takes the
punishment instead!
[Marone]: And Kim obviously got lost there, cuz he's
gettin' IN the ring, when he should be hopping OFF the
apron to avoid those punches.
{The two circle and feint for several seconds, before Kim finally
moves in and manages a scoop slam; he sweeps Joe's legs as Joe
stands, then follows up with a martial-arts punch.}
>>RINGSIDE<<
{Steve pulls the flamethrower out of the barrel, firing up a puff of
flame in the air with a childlike grin. He then mouths a
"IknowIknowIknow" to Angela before she can say anything, but pulls the
trigger for a couple more quick sprays before setting it back in the
can.}
[Swayze]: EsCObo, that lunatic is LOSING it again ...
[Marone]: Losing what? I think he's got everything pretty much
covered -- it's all in the can, how can he lose anything?
>>RING<<
{Kim throws Joe into the ropes, then tags in Jilliam; the two try
another tandem back drop, but Joe stops just short and nails double
rabbit punches to stun both members. A backspin punch knocks the
reeling Kim through the ropes to the outside, while a punch, punch,
windup punch sequence knocks Jil to the mat.}
[Escobar]: More double-team action -- NO! Perfection telegraphed
that, dare I say, *perfectly*, and Joe simply DRILLS them in the
back of the head!
[Swayze]: Justino, you are SO sued.
[Escobar]: Joe dusting Kim out of the ring quickly, and now he's
going to town on Jilliam!
[Marone]: Lucky for Jil we're pretty much in the suburbs here,
because if town was much farther away he'd be a dead man the
way those blows are landing.
{Jil gets up fairly quickly as the referee begins his KO count, while
Joe makes a nod to StI ... he then works Jil towards the L4aF corner
with jabs and hooks.
[Escobar]: Joe steering Jilliam Bole like a pack animal -- and
now he's practically turning Jilliam's insides into Chinese
food right now with those fists! Bole is in BIG trouble!
{Joe hammers Bole with a series of bodyblows, then tags in Steve.
Steve grabs Bole around the waist, lifts him up, and falls backwards
to drop him facefirst onto the turnbuckle.}
[Marone]: Not to mention the wrong corner.
[Escobar]: Steve in, and he's trying-- THE FRONTAL LOBOTOMY!
That may very well be the most spinechilling move in modern
wrestling!
[Swayze]: Yeah, but this is supposed to be modern BOXING,
Escobo -- get IN there, Tom!
{Tom Neuman does indeed take Steve to task inside.}
[Marone]: Man, Perfection must have this guy totally
snowjobbed. He's giving Steve a standing eight or something
for that ...
[Escobar]: I'm afraid that WOULD be against the state's boxing
regulations, Mike.
{The referee forces Steve to let Jil back on his feet, and Jil regains
enough sense to take Steve down with a hiptoss as Neuman signals for a
continue.}
[Marone]: I hate this kinda thing -- I think that guy is making
up the rules as he goes along. First you can't headbutt. Then
you can't knock them outside. Then you can't Lobotomize them.
Then you can't use a flamethrower. I mean really, where does it
STOP?
{Jil follows up with an elbow drop, and drags Steve back to his feet;
a whip to the corner is accompanied by a kick to the back from Kim.
Bole then throws Steve into the ropes, and tags in Kim; the two catch
Steve on the rebound with a double dropkick.}
[Escobar]: This is, of course, what Perfection prides themselves
most on, the ability to coordinate paired maneuvers such as that
like clockwork on their opponents.
[Marone]: True, Justin. You know, sometimes I wonder why people
don't give them more respect.
[Swayze]: It's about time you came around!
[Marone]: Yeah, then I remember they're pansy cheating wusses with
chick names.
{Jilliam rolls out of the ring, as Kim pulls Steve back up; Steve
punches Kim in the gut, then delivers a pair of shots to the face.
Kim ducks a fourth punch, Steve steps around a kick, and Kim takes
a counterpunch; Kim nails a second kick, then follows it with a chop
and punch combo, but Steve interrupts a legsweep attempt with a
clubbing blow. Kim chops Steve again, and Steve clotheslines him.}
[Escobar]: Steve fighting back here with great determination.
He may only be able to box, but he's going to box like there's
no tomorrow!
[Swayze]: There won't be, if Perfection has any say in it.
[Marone]: Justin, dude, that was a pretty big reach, man.
{Kim swings his legs over the mat to sweep down Steve, then stands
up and tags in Jilliam. They turn to mug for the crowd a bit, then
launch into synchronized handspring elbows.}
[Marone]: YOWZA! Man, that was actually kind of cool! I mean
... well, it wasn't cool that Steve got hit with that, but
... hey, sorry, Steve, it *was*!
{Jill slaps on a headlock as Steve is getting back up; he grinds
it a couple times, then runs forward to jump into a bulldog. This
is followed with a tag back to Kim, who legsweeps Steve back to
the mat before he can stand completely. Bole climbs the corner as
Kim holds down Steve with a headlock; Kim then turns around in
front of Steve, picking him up for a powerbomb that Jilliam spikes
with a flying elbow drop.}
[Escobar]: Perfection prepares another team combination--
[Swayze]: It's the Perfect Tag Team Powerbomb! You'll NEVER
see anything like that from these boxing bozos!
[Marone]: Not as long as they have to wear those dumb gloves,
anyway.
{Bole heads back outside as Kim grabs Steve in a headlock; he pulls
him to his feet, then chops him across the chest. He directs the
referee to Joe, claiming some sort of chicanery, as Jilliam climbs
the corner again.
[Swayze]: Perfect Tag Team Suplex, vintage '96! That'll be the
end of it!
[Escobar]: Neuman back over to count the pin -- one! Tw-- no,
Steve throws him off!
{Steve gets put in another controlling headlock.}
[Marone]: Where are you *getting* that stuff, Chad? I mean --
'vintage 96'??? What's vintage '97?
[Swayze]: Just like that, only one year more devastating!
[Marone]: Ohhh, THAT'S informative ... why do we want to work
with this guy again, Justin?
{Kim slaps in Jilliam, and throws Steve to the ropes again; Bole
scores a jumping roundhouse to knock him down.}
[Escobar]: (low voice) We *don't*, Mike ...
{Kim and Jil pull Steve back up together, and Steve rewards their
teamwork with a double clothesline that sends them both over the
top rope. The referee shakes a hand to the timekeeper, and the bell
rings.}
[Escobar]: The Insane one recovering from a touchy spot--
what? Referee Tom Neuman is calling for the end of the match?
[Marone]: Don't ask me ... heck, don't ask HIM ... I already
said I think he's fakin' it in there.
[Rod Allen]
Ladies and gentlement ... the winners of this match, due to a
disqualification ... PERFECTION!!!
[Escobar]: I'm not entirely persuaded that was a correct call,
given that he was countering an obviously illegal situation
himself -- but the referee has made his decision ... and I'm
afraid that puts Looking for a Fight one match down in this
series against Perfection. Fans, we need to take a break!
======================================================================
COMMERCIAL BREAK
======================================================================
{Fade in to black background with four white "gunsight" circles
converging from the corners of the screen towards the center; when
they completely overlap, the screen flashes white and fades back to
a single black gunsight over a slow-motion image of Robbie Stevens
putting the Wicked Awesome Superkick to Justice. Red letters dissolve
in over the picture:}
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
:: SNAP SHOT ::
:: World Domination ::
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
{Ken Mischief stands on the set of Reynard Guile's Mansion, with
Guile and Greg Gardner.}
: The Champion ...
[Voice of Ellis Hamilton]: For thousands of miles runs the
world's longest unprotected border, between the United States
of America and the Dominion of Canada ... and it is across that
border that the biggest threat to America's ill-chosen heroes
has travelled -- and fittingly, just like that border, nobody
was watching ... until it was too late.
[Mischief]
First, the AWI comes up with some cockamamie idea that I would be a
willing participant in some lame tournament for the title. When I
refused, the AWI started worrying. But don't worry-- "Gardner will
come in and save the AWI." So I get stuck in a match for the World
Title against some has-been from yesteryear. Gardner, I respect you
for what you did but it's time to move on.
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
[Mischief]
Gardner, if you are THE NOW, hell, I must be the NOW AND FUTURE OF
WRESTLING!!! Gardner, when you stuck your nose in the ring saying you
deserved a title shot, you were looking for trouble. Well, Gardner,
you got BIG TROUBLE!!! Tonight, when I kick your carcass around the
ring and pin you 1-2-3, the AWI will finally have a real WORLD
CHAMPION!!!
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Brief clip of Ken Mischief powerbombing Masters.}
[Voice of Ellis Hamilton]: What does it take to attract the
attention due a great? Ken Mischief has proven himself against
the most talked-about names in our sport, from "The Awesome
One" Kerry Masters ...
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Brief clip of a "Big Trouble" backbreaker on Justice.}
[Hamilton]: ... to the man called Justice -- he has stepped
toe to toe and face to face with each, and walked away a
winner.
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Clip of Ken Mischief powerbombing Chris Sim, cut to a shot of him
throwing Sim over the ropes, and then a shot of Mischief throwing
Steve the Insane over the ropes.}
[Hamliton]: He has taken on, in spirit if not in fact, the
entire AWI roster in one go, to sieze the ultimate prize at
Spring Stampede '96.
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Ken Mischief is in the ring against Greg Gardner, with both men
returning to their feet after a fall. Gardner grabs Ken from behind,
but Ken pokes him in the eyes, then whips him into the ropes,
catching him on the rebound with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker.
[Hamilton]: And yet, after one more flawless Big Trouble slam
against the giant Greg Gardner, when the pin count heard 'round
the world transformed 1997 into regnal year "1 Ken Mischief" ...
{He falls on top exhaustedly for the cover: 1 ... 2 ... 3!}
[Hamilton]: ... eyes go wide, voices gasp, and hearts stop.
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Ken Mischief lifts the world title overhead to a shower of boos
after the referee hands it to him}
[Kyle Esprit]: JUST as he promised -- an hour ago, a week
ago, a YEAR ago, and when he first entered this league!
Nostradamus couldn't have given you a more accurate
prediction: this isn't victory, beautiful, IT'S DESTINY!!!
{The image freezes on the champion, fading to black and white.}
[Hamilton:] What did you think was going to happen?
{The camera view begins to cycle through a repeat of all the fight
footage previously shown at an accelerating pace, like it was stuck
on fast forward.}
[Hamilton]: Many people have criticized the new champion --
they say he's a flash in the pan; they say he's only a
transitional champion; they say he can't live up to the
standard of the title. In short, they say Ken Mischief just
can't be that good.
{The turbo montage ends with a series of a half dozen "Big Trouble"
slams on various wrestlers.}
[Hamilton]: *But they say it from a distance*.
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
: The Challenger ...
{Justice is in the ring against Mike Piersall, currently on the mat.}
[Raul Garcia]: Hold everything! Dr. Lupo is on the canvas ...
he just called Justice over to him ... and handed him some brass
knuckles!
[Stephen Augustus]: And Justice descends lower into the depths
of the abyss.
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
[Garcia]: Lupo down off the apron. Justice looks at the brass
knuckles ... AND PUTS THEM ON!!! This can't be happening!!!
[Augustus]: Alas poor Superman. We knew him well.
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Piersall sees Lupo, and heads for the ropes to confront him, and
Justice takes a swing at him with the knuckles, which Piersall manages
to barely dive aside from. The camera repeats the same image again,
then gets a closeup of Piersall's stunned expression.}
[Garcia]: And JUSTICE ... is down? Justice is kicking and
screaming like a madman! He's clutching his head and pounding
the mat! I don't get this!
[Augustus]: I think I do. There's no way a man like Justice can
do something so contrary to his own beliefs and justifications,
if you don't mind the word play, and not have some mental
repercussions. He's at the crossroads now and he can't seem to
handle it.
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Justice stands in the ring with a microphone, confronting Piersall.}
[Justice]
I ... have to apologize ... to a lot of people. First of all, Mike
Piersall and Greg Gardner. When you came out and confronted me a few
weeks ago, I had forgotten how you had stood by me in the past ... and
why you did. You did ... because you remembered something that I had
forgotten ... that friendship is more important than anything ... even
my mission. I ... needed you ... and when you tried to help, I rejected
you. I can't do anything now, but hope you will forgive me.
I have to apologize to you, the fans. Those of you who still cheered,
when I walked out tonight: Thank you, so much. You still believed in
me, when I gave you absolutely no reason to do so. I hope I can live
up to the trust you placed in me. For those of you who stopped
cheering, who saw what I was doing, and disapproved: I am so very,
very sorry. I have to do everything I can, for the rest of my life,
if necessary, to make it up to you; to regain your trust, and your
support. I *need* you behind me ... because when I lose faith, what
you give me keeps me going. I forgot that, for a few months, and I
betrayed you. And I swear, as long as you are with me, that will never
happen again.
But all that leaves the question: Why did this happen? Why did
Justice lose his faith, and come so close to the edge?...
{The last sentence rings with an echo effect, before ...}
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Justice stands next to Jerry Straite, with Jerry holding a mic.}
[Justice]
{angrily} *Somebody* had been pushing events to occur the way they
had! *Somebody* wanted me vulnerable. And when I was at my most
vulnerable, who appeared, ready to destroy what was left of
my mission and my friendships?
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Reverend Jeremiah James and Mikhail Tzskova have joined Jerry and
Justice on set.}
[Reverend Jeremiah James]
Purge your anger, you who call yourself Justice ... he that despises
discipline also despises knowledge. Listen, if you would be wise ...
you seek a life of honor, and you suffer. You seek to bring punishment
to the guilty, and still you suffer. You question the will that has
brought you to this moment -- and still you suffer.
{He folds one arm across his chest and extends the other towards
Justice, open handed.}
True justice belongs to the LORD, for he alone parts the righteous
from the wicked. Your suffering can end ... you *can* deliver justice
to this association ... if you but step onto the path of the LORD ...
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
[Justice]
And you tell me ... that I don't have to bear the burden of the
choices, that the judgements will be made ... and all I have to do is
enforce it. That would be soooo glorious; to sit at side of He who
knows right from wrong and to go forth and *smite* the guilty.
{The crowd makes noises of unrest -- Justice is even beginning to talk
like Reverend James. Justice's gaze returns to the ground.}
[Justice]
But our Lord is not here on Earth ... and I cannot see him and ask him
what is right and what is wrong. Instead, we trust His Earthly agents
to tell us what He wants. And when He does choose His agent to speak to
me, to tell me what to do ... IT SURE ... AS HELL ... WOULDN'T ... BE
... YOU!!!
{The crowd ROARS, Straite grins, James merely stares coldly at
Justice.}
[Justice]
I'VE SEEN what you two call JUSTICE, and I ... WILL ... STOP YOU!!!
AND IF I HAVE TO WALK THROUGH HELL TO DO IT, IF I AM DAMNED FOR ALL
*ETERNITY* FOR STANDING UP TO YOUR "TEACHINGS", _THEN SO BE IT_!!!
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{We're treated to a repeat shot of Justice swinging at Mike Piersall
with the brass knuckles from earlier, while Reverend James's voice
is heard.}
: The Collision ...
[Reverend James]: This ... is the TRUE Justice you see, the man
as the LORD intended. The task before him must be done, and he
does not flee from it, even though it may incur the wrath of his
beloved multitudes, even though it would destroy he who once was
considered "friend". Know this, my congregation, and hear this,
man called Justice ... thou seek to understand the chaos that
rules your heart ... and I offer that understanding now. For
that one night, thy TRUE heart was freed to the world ... for
that one night, THOU, not I, was the true sword of His justice
-- the role thou wer't *always* meant to fill.
------------------------<| Wipe to New Clip |>------------------------
{Justice walks to the ring to confronts Reverend James inside.}
[Justice]
You are the only one who does not see, James. This is not about who
the fans support; this is about what the people BELIEVE! What they
know to be right and wrong is the very essence of what Justice *is*;
What I AM! {climbs into the ring} You are correct; when I did that
{pointing at the video screen of him swinging at Piersall} I was not
serving my purpose; I was serving YOURS! But I already told you, I have
no intention of EVER being a part of ANYTHING that has to do with YOU,
EVER AGAIN!
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
[Reverend James]
Thy words are still corrupted by the chaos in your heart, but thy soul
will remain true, man called Justice. Thou cannot defy the will of the
LORD in this House of Truth ... and I will prove to thee and {sweeps
an arm across to indicate the fans} these faithless multitudes who seek
to chain thee to sin with their empty adoration. {lifts the hand with
the paper} I hold in this hand a binding contract, signed by the hand
of a decent and pious man, by the name of Ken Mischief ... in this
contract, he agrees to face the man who signs it for the championship
he now carries -- the AWI World Heavyweight championship ...
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
[Reverend James]
Were thee a weaker man, thee who calls thyself Justice, thou would
desire this contract. Were thee a false icon of the multitudes, thou
would sign your name to face this man. But I know that thou art a true
servant of the LORD ... that thy soul will follow His will in the end
... and so thou will deny this 'opportunity', will denounce the
organization that offers it to thee, and rebuke the sinners who would
have thee led astray ...
[Justice]
{brief pause} You pretend to know so much, yet you know so little.
Justice has no interest in belts and titles {snatches the contract}
but Justice DOES have an interest in punishing the guilty! Mischief is
an arrogant, brutal creature, and I've waited for a chance to bring
justice to him. I should thank you for giving it to me.
>>>--[Forward Cut]--------------------------------------------------|>
{Closeup of Justice's face, with intense expression.}
[Justice]
JUSTICE ... WILL BE SERVED!!!
======================================================================
>>RING<<
[Rod Allen]
LADIES ... AND ... GENTLEMEN ... it is time for the Line of Fire MAIN
EVENT! This FINAL contest is for the Allied Wrestling International
HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP OF THE WORLD ...
{The crowd cheers in anticipation.}
[Rod Allen]
The challenger ... weighing in at two hundred fifty pounds ... from
the Grand Forks, North Dakota, THIS ... IS ... JUSTICE!!!
{"It's a Mad, Mad World" (Tom Cochrane) hits the PA, and the crowd
wells into louder cheers, as Justice appears at the aisle entrance,
surrounded by random flash fireworks popping off. He heads down to
the ring with a determined look.}
[Rod Allen]
And his opponent tonight, weighing in at two hundred eighty pounds ...
from Calgary, Alberta, he IS the AWI World Heavyweight champion ...
KEEEEEENNN MISCHIEF!!!
{Ken appears at the entrance, highlighted by a series of spotlights
like a movie premiere, and accompanied to the ring to the strains of
"Crowd booing" by Fans in Attendance. He has the title strap slung
over one shoulder, and leaves it at the timekeeper's table before
stepping into the ring.}
[Rod Allen]
This match has a time limit of fifteen minutes ... your referee is
Curtis Keyes.
{Allen steps out of the ring as the bell sounds. The two lock up
in a collar-elbow tieup, that Ken breaks quickly with a series of
kicks -- Justice interrupts with a headbutt, but Ken shrugs it off
and bodyslams Justice. Justice quickly pulls Ken down with a drop
toehold.}
[Escobar]: And these two are going RIGHT for each other, no
hesitation!
{Mischief escapes and cinches on an armbar, rolling up to his feet,
pulling Justice with; he throws Justice hard into the corner, and
traps him rushing in after with a clothesline.}
[Swayze]: Vuja day, man -- you KNOW that the MAN has taken
Judge Dredd here on before ... and you KNOW what happened!
That's the real divine inspiration of Reverend James, if you
ask me -- taking this contract was its OWN punishment!
[Escobar]: I think we'd all be lucky if that was the ONLY
goal Jeremiah James had in mind -- but he appears to have
worse in mind for Justice ...
{Justice staggers out, Ken grabs him around the front, and snaps
into a belly to belly suplex. He then stands back up, waiting for
Justice to rise to his knees, and slaps on a head vise.}
[Escobar]: ... And I think that's a *vast* oversimplification
of the talents in this ring. Justice is an experienced
wrestler with a balance of strength, speed, and training -- I
certainly wouldn't believe that he learned *nothing* from his
earlier confrontation with Ken Mischief, and he may use what
he's learned to good use.
[Marone]: Yeah, everyone's got a weakness. Well, except for
DAKI ... if you found it, you'd get fired.
[Swayze]: If Justice is BACK in the ring with Mischief, and
thinks he's got a shot -- then I'd say he DID learn nothing!
{Justice slips free, and levels Ken with a drop toehold. Both men
stand, and Justice knocks Ken back down with a dropkick; they
rise again, and this time Justice scores a hiptoss.}
[Escobar]: Yes! Justice finally gets the advantage, and he's
showing great confidence in the ring now--
[Swayze]: See? NOTHING.
[Marone]: He learned how to hiptoss Ken. That's gotta be
worth something.
[Swayze]: Yeah, that and 99 cents will buy you a collect call
to your mom. "I saved ya money, Mom -- now SAVE ME from
MISCHIEF!"
{Justice rushes for the ropes as Ken stands back up, knocking him
over with a clothesline, and continues past, rebounding from the
opposite ropes to leap into a bodypress and cover: 1 ... 2 ... Ken
manages to throw him off.}
[Escobar]: Justice WITH A FALL! No! I thought that might have
been it, but Ken's still ready to fight ...
[Marone]: Don't jump ahead, Justin -- I mean, he didn't get
that shiny belt for his personality. BELIEVE me, he didn't.
{Ken punches Justice standing up, then throws him back into the
corner; he grabs Justice from behind to drag him back out to
mid-ring, but Justice counters with a jawbreaker. Justice pulls
him back up and delivers a neckbreaker, then drops to the mat to
apply a sleeper.}
[Escobar]: Justice resorts to the great equalizer, a simple
but effective maneuver which has taken down men as big as
Greg Gardner or Scott Bradley...
[Swayze]: Yeah, but those were sleepers from OTHER guys ...
[Marone]: Cuz, like, he's REALLY mean and stuff ... you know
he doesn't even tip the dudes in the parking lot who park the
cars? Total cheapskate ... and he said some stuff to these
girls hangin' out in the back I wouldn't repeat in mixed
company. Like with Perfection, f'rinstance.
{Mischief shoves his way free, and starts to rise. Justice throws
a punch, Mischief blocks; Ken returns a punch, and Justice blocks.
Justice headbutts Ken and moves in to lock on an abdominal stretch.}
[Marone]: You know, I think Justice DID learn something. He
at least learned that if you stick to Ken like glue, he can't
toss you in the ropes for the Big Trouble.
[Swayze]: Which means THIS time, he'll learn what the standing
Big Trouble feels like!
[Marone]: Like normal Big Trouble, only slower?
{Mischief elbows loose the abdominal stretch, but Justice holds on
long enough to swing him into a hiptoss.}
[Swayze]: Uh, yeah -- kinda like how you're like a real person,
only slower.
{He scoops up Ken onto his shoulders as Mischief gets back to his feet,
dropping back for a fallaway slam; he then stands up, grabs Ken's feet,
and steps over for the Boston Crab.}
{Escobar]: Justice with a BIG slam ... and-- THE SUMMONS!
JUSTICE HAS LOCKED ON THE SUMMONS! Ken Mischief is pressing
himself up, trying to improve his leverage or at least relieve
the pressure of that hold any way he can ...
[Swayze]: C'mon, champ! Don't let the chump beat you!
[Marone]: Especially not if Daki's in a bad mood ... it might
be out the door ... what was WITH him tonight, man? You'd think
he lost money on the playoffs or something.
[Escobar]: Money definitely seems to be at the root of it, but
I don't think a football pool begins to cover it ... you can see
the effort on both men's faces as Ken moves for the side-- and
he forces a break!
{Ken Mischief reaches the ropes, and the referee taps Justice off.
Justice bends down and slaps on a hammerlock, pulling Ken up; Ken
twists it around to grab Justice by the wrist, then swings him back
into the turnbuckle.}
[Marone]: He shoulda picked the Titans. I did. Won a six-pack.
[Swayze]: Yeah, well JUSTICE should've picked somebody else
to fight this match for him! Mischief's just TOO strong!
[Marone]: Hey, cool segue! Don't pick on Justice, though.
{He grabs Justice around the chest on the bounce, lifts him up while
turning to one side, and sidewalk slams him.}
[Marone]: DAMN, I think Ken's gone from Mischief to MAD.
[Escobar]: That was just a RIVETING slam from the champion
-- Justice could be in trouble--
{He hooks a leg and slaps the mat impatiently for the referee,
who drops down to make the count -- but Justice is up before 1.}
[Escobar]: --but no! Not even one!
[Swayze]: That was just the *free sample* trouble, Justino
-- when the Big Trouble comes, whole different story!
[Marone]: Yeah, it's in hardcover. This is just the paperback
hurt.
{Ken pulls up Justice and throws him to the ropes; Justice hops
over him as he rebounds with a sunset flip -- Ken claps his knees
to break the roll before the referee can start a count. Both men
scramble up, but Justice is faster and grabs Ken's head, spinning
into a neckbreaker; Ken trips him up from the mat, and stands back
up.}
[Escobar]: Justice is bumping up the pace of this match a
notch -- he may be sensing an opportunity, or just hoping to
rush Ken into making a mistake!
[Swayze]: Ken'll make a mistake, all right ... "whoops, I
stepped on this guy's neck and broke it! Damn, gotta watch
that ..."
{Ken moves in towards the rising Justice, cinching him for a suplex
attempt, but Justice blocks and reverses. He gets back to his feet
and turns Ken into a second Boston Crab.}
[Escobar]: Justice AGAIN tries the Summons -- but this time
he's just TOO close to the ring edge, and Ken has no trouble
making it invalid!
[Swayze]: Ken's gonna have no trouble making AN invalid outta
Justice ... Justice had better hope the Rev forgives him for
all that dissin' he's been doing, and lays on hands!
{Ken gets a hand to the ropes quickly, and pulls himself up to his
feet as Justice releases it; Justice grabs him, tugs him away from
the ropes, and jumps up into a crucifix roll: 1 ... Ken throws him
off.}
[Swayze]: HEY! That wasn't fair -- he's gotta give the man
time to BREATH or something!
[Marone]: Uh, why?
[Swayze]: That's your CHAMPION there, fuzzy, he gets
PRIVILEGES!
{Ken smacks Justice with a forearm on the mat, then grabs his head,
standing up before dropping a DDT. He takes a moment to catch his
breath, letting Justice stand up, then whips Justice to the ropes;
Justice surprises him on the return with a sunset flip.}
[Escobar]: Another sunset flip from Justice -- 1 ... 2 ... 3!
HE DID IT! Justice got the pin! Fans, we have NEW WORLD
CHAMPION!
[Swayze]: What? NO! I demand a recount! This is INjustice!
[Marone]: No, it's ON Justice. See, the belt goes ON Justice.
[Escobar]: Aficionados, I'm sure we'd all like to stay a while
and celebrate with the new champion--
[Swayze]: Hey! ALLEGED champion, that has yet to be confirmed!
[Escobar]: --but we're running short on time! Be sure to catch
us next week at our regular time ... until then, this is Justin
Escobar, with Chad Swayze and "Madman" Mike Marone, for AWI Two
Thousand!!!
======================================================================
This work copyright © 2000 by Allied Sports Enterprises. Allied
Wrestling International is a member of the Summit Wrestling Alliance;
permission is given to distribute or rebroadcast AWI footage in
cooperation with Summit Wrestling events.
Executive Producer:
Lyle Galbraithe
Production Director:
Bryant Berggren
Script Director:
Bryce Berggren
Writing Staff:
Todd Cockrell, Ray Duffy, Ran Hardin, Steve Pillmeier,
Eric Roy, David Tiemroth, Thomas Whilloughby, Chris Wimberly
"CBS Eye" is a registered trademark of Columbia Broadcasting System,
used without permission for purposes of parody; no actual association
between the writers and CBS should be inferred. "Promotional"
trademarks likewise used without permission or affiliation for
purposes of parody.
======================================================================
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