The bathroom door is closed. 
Please do not stand here and whine, 
or paw at the door begging to join me. 
Wait until I get out.  Yes, it is locked.
I want it that way.  It is not broken, nor am I trapped.
Don't  feel compelled to rescue me.

  I know that I have left it unlocked, and even open at times since you were a puppy, because I was afraid some horrible tragedy might occur while I was there, but you are no longer 
a puppy and I want some PRIVACY!

  Do not sigh in disgust over how long I will be. 
I will come out when I am done.

  Do not bring your squeaky toy to the bathroom door.
I don't wish to  play now.

Do not begin to fight with the other dog(s) as soon as I go in.

  Do not stick your tongue under the door and snuffle at me.
This was funny when you were a puppy.

  Do not slide your paws, your toys, 
or your nose under the door.
 Even when you were a puppy, this got to be a little tiresome.
 

  If you have followed me down the hall, 
and are still there as you face this closed door, 
please turn around,  walk away, 
and wait for me in another room. 
I will be glad to pet you when I am done.

  And yes,  I still love you.
 

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