May 10, 1999

well...something actually did come true...and i'm being hated for it...i don't think it has anything to do with anybody but so many people feel like it does...it doesn't effect them in anyway and they are not part of it..why should they be mad? and i still can't explain to another that i'm not ready to settle down yet...if i had 12 years like him, i would be...
i'm still trying to figure out the status of this relationship and know if i should end it...he still won't answer...i'm not sure what to do if he doesn't give me a little feedback...
travis wants me back now that there's someone else...should i be flattered? i don't think so..but it makes me feel like i have power...

graduation is coming and i can't wait to get out of this house..but my dad is sick and i'm not too sure how bad it is..i'm not acting up but i'm being treated like and a demon child because of everything going on..i want things to be simple in every direction like it was for a while..