andy
andy recently moved
out of his parent's house,
never had a drink
of alcohol and
is a virgin
and today was his
31st birthday.
james, matt and i
decided to throw andy
a birthday party
and we were gonna split
the cost of
a high-class whore
who would treat him right,
but we decided
to just get him drunk:
it was easier on the
wallet and was something we
could enjoy with him.
an hour and a half
later andy was on the floor,
propped against his couch,
crying about how he was
such a failure and how
if his mother were to walk
in and see him like this
she would be so
very disappointed.
we all immediately left
so as to not
ruin our buzz
and
james, matt and
i agreed that
we should've splurged
for the whore
and let her deal
with the tears.
-published in Umbriate