Car Trouble
WIFE: "There's trouble with the car. It has water in the
carburetor."
HUSBAND: "Water in the carburetor? That's ridiculous."
WIFE: "I tell you the car has water in the carburetor."
HUSBAND: "You don't even know what a carburetor is. I'll check it out. Where's the
car?"
WIFE: "In the pool."
Please Release Me
Dr. Leroy, the head psychiatrist at the local mental hospital, is
examining patients to see if they're cured and ready to re-enter society.
"So, Mr. Clark," the doctor says to one of his patients, "I see by your
chart that you've been recommended for dismissal. Do you have any idea what you might do
once you're released?"
The patient thinks for a moment, then replies, "Well, I went to school for mechanical
engineering. That's still a good field, good money there. But on the other hand, I thought
I might write a book about my experience here in the hospital, what it's like to be a
patient here. People might be interested in reading a book like that. In addition, I
thought I might go back to college and study art history, which I've grown interested in
lately."
Dr. Leroy nods and says, "Yes, those all sound like intriguing possibilities."
The patient replies, "And the best part is, in my spare time, I can go on being a
teapot."
Irritation, Aggravation, and
Frustration ...as explained by a father.
A boy asks his father to explain the differences among irritation,
aggravation, and frustration.
Dad picks up the phone and dials a number at random. When the phone is answered he asks,
"Can I speak to Alf, please?"
"No! There's no one called Alf here." The person hangs up.
"That's irritation," says Dad.
He picks up the phone again, dials the same number and asks for Alf a second time.
"No -- there's no one here called Alf. Go away. If you call again I shall telephone
the police." End of conversation.
"That's aggravation."
"Then what's 'frustration'?" asks his son.
The father picks up the phone and dials a third time:
"Hello, this is Alf. Have I received any phone calls?"
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