This skit leads to an explanation on how to be a maturing
Christian, you need to take care of your Christian life on a daily basis,
and if you're not a growing Christian, you're a dieing Christian. We used
it specifically to promote regular bible readings and the joining of bible
study groups. Parallels can be found in this sketch to Monty Python's
'Parrot Sketch'. Something the adult congregation picked up on, but the
kids had no idea about!
Cast: Shopkeeper (S) - very patient
Customer (C) - aggressive, but not very clued up on growing thing
Start - Shopkeeper in shop. Customer enters carrying a long straggly
dead plant; it’s roots have been cut off.
S Good morning sir, can I help you?
C I’ve got a complaint - about this plant that YOU sold me.
S Ah yes. (nervously) And what seems to be the trouble?
C (Shoving the plant in his face) It’s dead isn’t it?
S Eh yes . . . it doesn’t look that healthy . . . you’re right.
C Not healthy? It’s dead. Deceased. Departed. Defunct. It’s shuffled off this mortal coil. It’s gone to the great Botanic Garden in the sky.
S (Inspecting the remains) Yes, you appear to have a point there.
C And I was going to give it to my sister for her birthday. And when I purchased this plant not a week ago, you assured me that this plant was in perfectly fine health
S Well it was.
C And within a short time, it didn’t look good at all. Now it is an ex-plant. It has ceased to be!
S Tell me. Did you water it?
C (Looking at him as if he’s mad) What is it - a fish? I wasn’t going to drown it, was I?
S NO, just a little each day would have done. And what happened to the soil
C What, all that dirt around the bottom? Look, I wasn’t going to drown it was I? No way. I got it all nice and clean
S. Well, er . . . and what happened to all the roots?
C What those straggly yucky, dirty brown things hanging of the bottom? Oh. I chopped those off right away.
S. Let me explain (slowly and patiently) A plant needs roots to keep it firm in the ground and to draw up food and water from the soil.
C No, really (stunned) Go on!
S I’m afraid the only reason this plant is dead is because you’ve killed it.
C Oh (walks off)