Disclaimer: the charcters in Buffy: The Vampire Slayer are the propery of Saint Joss and the WB, and this story is written with apologies to them and to Anthony Head and Sarah Gellar.

Rating: PG-13 for strong language and violence.

Author's note: I know I have to finish, like, three stories...Werewolves of Paris, Mon Petit Vulcan, and Wide Awake and Dreaming....but I keep getting these ideas....will someone please tell Buffy and Rupert to stop bugging me? Please? I'm begging here.

And, since I wrothe this last week (uh, 9/19/98), it's already been Jossed....sighs.

Part One: Home

Buffy stepped off of the bus and immediately shrugged the hood of her jacket over her head. It was hard enough to be at the bus station. From here, Buffy could see the docks where she and Angel had kissed when trying to stop the Judge...before Angel had become Angelus and tried to destroy her life.

He'd nearly succeeded, too. He'd destroyed her emotional strength, her relationships with her friends, and finally, even after his destruction, driven her away from her mother and her Watcher. Right out of town she left, after stealthily packing a few of her things and leaving a note.

Would they be happy to see her? she wondered. She had deserted them, after all. What if Spike didn't keep his promise to leave the country? Worse, what if he had kept his promise, but Drusilla had returned? Were her friends still alive? And who was patrolling?

Buffy reached into her careworn bag and pulled out a stake. "Well, Mister Pointy, it's back to the salt mines for you." she said as she passed through the park.

Far up the pathway ahead, Buffy could make out two figures, scuffling. She increased her pace a bit and watched intently. Busting in on a non-vamp fight wasn't exactly conducive to maintaining her secret identity. She felt worry, all of a sudden, as if someone close to her was in immediate danger. Adrenaline pumped through her veins, pushing her faster forward. She neared the fight, and made out the face of one of the combatants. It was distorted, the bones of the facial structure jutting up beyond what a normal human's would. It was a demon's face. A vampire's face. Buffy broke into a dead run.

The creature moved around behind his target and, pinning the man's arms behind his back, sank his fangs in the target's neck. The man screamed and clawed at the vampire, finally gouging out one of its eyes. Still, the vampire held on and drank.

Buffy closed in on the two enemies as the victim sank to the ground, and looked down at the man. He was still breathing, but there was a little blood on his tweed jacket, and his wire framed glasses were crushed beneath the boot of the vampire....realization galvanized the Slayer and her blood boiled.

Giles. Hurt. Giles. Hurt. Gileshurtgileshurtkillkillkill!!

"You FUCKER!" Buffy screeched as she launched herself at the vampire, dropping Mister Pointy and instead swinging her left fist in a wide arc toward the vampire's head. She connected solidly, surprising him and knocking him to the ground. The vampire smiled evilly as he lay there, recognising the petite blonde.

"Welcome home, Slayer. Miss us?" he kicked a leg out, tripping Buffy, who fell forward onto all fours. The vamp did a kippup, standing behind Buffy, who pushed off with her hands to kick him with both feet. The vamp staggered back clutching his jaw.

Using the leverage from the kick, Buffy neatly flipped in the air to land standing again. She circled behind him and launched a flurry of powerful kicks, brutally breaking his left arm, then his right hip. He swung wildly at her, and blood flowed from cuts on his forehead into his eyes.The vamp staggered and fell, landing on his bad leg, and Buffy knelt, grabbed him by the hair, and slammed his face into the hard concrete several times, before dragging him over to a manhole.

Opening the cover, she said, "Let whoever's in charge know: I'm fucking back in town. To stay, asshole. Got it?" She slammed his face into the ground again for emphasis. "And if anyone even looks cross-eyed at my Watcher or my friends again, I'm going to beat the shit out of them, just like I did to you. Only after I'm done with them, they'll be staked. You getting this? Do I need to tell you again?" She slapped him in the jaw, hard, and then pulled her cross out of her shirt, burning him on the forehead with it. "ANSWER ME!"

"I...I got it. I'll tell them." he mumbled. Buffy dumped him unceremoniously into the sewers and closed the cover before running over to Giles.

He awoke in his own bed, clad only in his boxer shorts but tucked in, with the covers drawn up to his chin. He sat up, and felt at his neck. A bandage covered the wound on his neck, and he was sore and bruised all over. Someone had ministered to his injuries from tonight's fights, and the old ones from a summer's worth of slaying patrols.

He was covered in some foul, medicinal-smelling cream. It itched. It reeked. And he was humiliated.

To lose a fight to a fledgling vampire...let him drink from me...he's got to be extremely powerful now, with the Watcher's blood in him. Where the hell is Buffy when you need her? Giles thought to himself.

As if in answer to his question, the door to his room swung open, and the Slayer herself wandered in slowly with a tray of tea-things. "Heya, Giles."

"Buffy..." he breathed. "You're here." His heart leapt. She was home, finally, after three months of worrying, three months of anguished nights of Willow's worried hacking. His stomach jammed into his throat, and, he said haltingly, "I can't believe it. Is it really you?"

"Yeah. I am." She answered. A shy smile ran across her lips as she set the tray down on his nightstand. She sat down on the bed next to him and said."You should lay down...you've lost a lot of blood."

"Wha-what time is it?" he asked.

"Eleven thirty," she answered patiently.

"I need to call Willow to check in. She'll be worried." Giles said. He looked up at her. "I missed you, Buffy."

Tears shone in Buffy's eyes, and she collapsed onto her Watcher's bed. Clutching a pillow, she said, "I'm so sorry, Giles."

"Sorry?" he echoed.

"You're hurt...hurt all over because of me...because I wasn't here to patrol..."she sobbed."God, can't I do anything right?"

"Buffy, I..." he began. He didn't really know what to say, so he put his arms around her and held her as she cried. Sobs shook her small frame, and she sounded so pitiful that he couldn't help but shed a few tears, too.

"Do you remember, Giles, the beginning of last school year? When I was a total bitch to everyone 'cause I was dealing with my Master issues?" she asked after she'd calmed down a bit.

"I remember." Giles gestured for her to continue.

"You said that that was hardly the worst mistake I would ever make." she laughed darkly. "You sure can call 'em."

He shook his head, still unsure of what to say.

"I killed him, Giles. I killed him. Jenny can rest in peace." Buffy said. No need to tell Giles that he'd been her Angel, and not Angelus, when he'd been killed. She didn't need his pity...didn't want it. His sad eyes would amplify her pain, and she was already constantly on the verge of tears. And now Giles was the only one who could even comprehend, if even understand, the depth of her pain and lonliness. Because he felt pain and lonliness too.

Buffy looked at him, laying wounded in his big bed, and frowned. If she'd arrived an town any later, he would be dead now. Giles dead. More blood on her hands. Buffy reached out for him, like she would for a security blanket. "Can I stay here tonight?" she asked as she curled up next to him.

"Do you want to?" he asked seriously.

"I need to. Giles, please..." she said mournfully.

"Of course you may. Do you have sleepwear?" he asked.

"Not really. I never really needed any." she answered.

"Then grab one of my shirts. You can change while I call Willow." he said.

"Don't tell her I'm here." Buffy said. "I can't deal with very much at once right now."

"Whatever you want. At least let me call her. You go ahead and change." Giles got up out of bed and shrugged into his bathrobe. "I'll be right back."

Buffy watched him go.

"Willow?"

"Giles?" came the hushed whisper over the telephone wire. Willow had gotten a summer job waiting tables in an italian restaurant in town, enabling her to get her own telephone line to keep in touch with the Scooby Gang. In Buffy's absence, she'd served as Giles's pseudo- Watcher, training with him and occasionally picking up patrols. She also kept tabs on him, making sure that, in his Slayer's absence, he didn't drive himself crazy.

"Thank god you're OK. Five more minutes and I would have come out looking for you." she said.

"I'm fine, but we need to meet tomorrow. I have important news." Giles said, trying to sound casual.

"About Buffy?" Willow said carefully.

"Call Xander and Cordelia and Oz, and tell them to meet here at ten, okay? Please?" Giles asked.

"All right." Willow acceded, knowing that she wouldn't get anything more out of him.

"Goodnight, Willow." he said.

"G'night, Giles." he heard her mumble something about "stubborn Englishmen" as she hung up the phone. He smiled, and headed back into his room.

Buffy was changed, and had cleaned up the unused snack tray (Must've snuck by me... Giles thought.) and turned down the bedcovers. She was sitting on the side, brushing out her hair, as he walked back in.

She set down the brush, and he smiled warmly at her. Turning out the light, he removed his robe and crawled in bed next to her. She curled up next to him, draping one arm over him. "Giles?" she said softly.

"Yes?"

"I missed you too." His hand brushed a stray lock of hair behind her ear, and she reached over and kissed him gently on the mouth before snuggling in for the night.

Giles smiled and held her closer.

His Slayer was home.

His Buffy.

Home.

part Two: Morning Mourning

Willow wrinkled her nose in distaste at the smell of Ben Gay that was coming off of Giles. She pushed her cats-eye sunglasses up onto her forehead and said, "Rough night?" as she walked into the apartment. Oz followed behind her, seeming, as always, bewildered by the brezzy attitude his sweet girlfriend had developed over the summer.

Oz supposed that training with Giles had done that to her. Willow was different on the inside -- she had lost her soft innocence and in its place was an edge of some kind; the perky, brainy redhead had gone from shy and bookish to outspoken, stubborn, honest and -- well, still bookish, but. She was just tougher than she had been before Buffy's disappearance. She'd even gone on patrol alone, and staked three vampires in one night.

She was different on the outside, too, due to a Cordelia Chase Mondo Makeover, the result of Willow losing a bet with Cordy that neither party liked to think about. Her once long, straight, coppery hair was cut into a fetching, face-framing bob, and her clothes were different, too, since she'd discovered she sorta liked showing off her slender form. Too much time with Cordelia, Oz thought to himself. But I'm developing this obsession with her ass...

Oz grinned as Giles gave Willow something that was affectionately called "the look." It was the look Giles gave when you were being exasperating, overly obvious, too sarcatic, or just plain silly. "What?" she said, smiling brilliantly at her mentor. "Don't look at me in that tone of voice. What's the big news?"

Giles motioned the couple inside, and shut the door. As Oz walked into the siting room, Willow wandered into the kitchen to make coffee, a habit she'd developed over the long summer when it would look unseemly for a student to hang out in the official buildings with a faculty member. They'd spent many a late night searching session here on Willow's and Cordelia's ("What, I can't own a laptop?") portable computers, and they'd consumed many cups of coffee and tea as well.

As Willow entered the kitchen, she noticed that the refrigerator door was open, and she went to close it. It seemed like it was jammed, so she tried to push on it again.

"Ow! Watch it, jeezus!" came Xander's voice from behind the door. Willow put her elbows on top of it and smiled down on him.

"I should have known I'd find you in here, hooverboy. There even any food left?" she said jokingly as she unconsciously pulled on the collar of her shirt in a gesture that mimicked Oz.

"Hi, cute buddy!" Xander said, his arms piled full of sandwich makings. He stood, closed the crisper with one foot and the door with the other. "How's my favorite redhead doing today?"

"Dandy. Any clue why we're here?" she asked as she helped him unload the food onto the counter. She looked out over the ledge into the living room, where Giles was fidgeting madly, and Oz was just sitting calmly.

"Not a one. And Giles won't tell till Cordy gets here."

"Where is Cordy, anyway?" Willow asked. When Xander looked at her askance, she said, "Can't I change? She and I have become real good," Willow paused, "Okay, not real good, but semi decent, or at least, civil, friends over the summer since Buffy's been gone, and now I am inquiring after her health and general whereabouts, so, again, where's Cordelia?"

Xander was busily making sandwiches, and Willow started a pot of coffee (decaf), and put a kettle on the stove to boil for Giles' tea. He answered. "Hair appointment. She should be here by eleven." With that, he handed a plate to his friend, cut the huge roast beef sandwiches in half, and piled the food onto the plates. Willow thoughtfully munched on her Doritos while she waited for the coffee to brew.

"It's a good thing we buy groceries for over here, Giles. It makes those late-night cram sessions pass by that much faster," Xander said as he set his plate down on the coffee table. Giles snagged a Dorito, and said as Xander swatted his hand away,

"Otherwise I'd have to charge you rent."

Buffy was getting restless. She'd been sitting in Giles's bedroom for the last hour, since Xander had arrived, uncharacteristically early, at 9:45 in the morning. She'd still been curled up on him, sleeping in the same bed with someone for the first time since Angel...since Angel. Buffy pushed the thought out of her mind. Angel was gone, for all intents and purposes he was dead, and she'd run away to deal with her anger and sorrow. It had been all she could do not to let herself tumble into madness. The only thing that had kept her sane was the knowledge that Giles was still alive.

As long as Giles was alive, she had someone to go home to.

She had no idea how she knew he was alive, except she felt she'd know if he were dead. She felt attached to him, somehow, as if all the time spent training together over the last few years had bound them spiritually, as if they could sense the other's life force. She'd known that the vampire's prey last night had been Giles; she'd felt the life coursing out of him. She shuddered now as she thought about how close she'd been to losing him.

That vamp had really made her lose it! Buffy couldn't believe she'd been that vicious to any creature. Usually, she prescribed to the "plunge and move on" school of vampire slayage, but, for some reason, last night.....she'd wanted to inflict as much hurt on that creature as she could. She'd wanted him to feel even a shadow of the pain the demons that were here enemies had made her feel over the last few years.

She thought about it: burning down the gym at Hemery; the look on Merrick's face as Lothos drove the stake through his heart; Pike's scream as he was thrown off of the top of a building in LA, plummeting to his death; killing two Master vampires, one of whom had nearly killed her; meeting Angel, loving Angel; Angel coming with Xander to rescue her; Angel kissing her, Angel making love to her; Angelus hurting her; Angelus' glee when holding Willow by the throat; Angelus on the ground with Spike standing over him holding a crowbar; Angelus holding a sword to her breast; Angelus turning back into Angel. Kissing Angel, then, finally, the feel of the sword as it slid through his body, the look of betrayal in his eyes as the vortex sucked him into Hell.

Buffy knew why she'd let that vamp live. She wanted him to suffer, like she'd suffered. Vampires are soulless, they feel no guilt, or sorrow, so she gave him her suffering the only way she knew how. Pain.

And she hoped it fucking hurt.

Part Three: Reunion

Cordelia fidgeted in the lumpy armchair she'd come to think of as her own; it was the only place in Giles' living room where she couldn't see the bookshelves but could still reach the antiquated stereo. For the which she had finally broken down and brought an old, one-disc CD player over, and let Willow install it. Willow was really good at those kind of things.

Giles, on the other hand, resented Cordelia's intrusion into his personal belongings. He had a massive record collection, which included lots of 70's rock, and he wasn't sure about joining the modern era if the music, in the modern, SoCal teenage patois, "sucked."

So Cordelia flipped through the albums again, even though she'd had all the titles memorized since the second week of summer school...she chose a title, and set the record on to play.

Xander looked up quickly as the music began. "Cordelia, how many times are we going to have to listen to this song before my head explodes?"

"Well, now, there's an idea. Cordelia, please, any time you want to hear this song, do put it on." Giles said drily.

"Hey!" Xander said, affronted and surprised by the Watcher's jibe. He sure was in a good mood today. What, did he get laid or something? Xander thought.

Cordelia grinned even as Willow tossed a pillow at her head.

"Don't even think about singing along, Cordy."

Cordy and Giles exchanged glances, and began to sing at the same time:

"Carry on my wayward son
There'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry no more!"

"I used to like Kansas." Oz groaned.

Buffy watched the exchange sadly from the landing at the top of the stairs. I guess they did okay without me, she thought. He's even getting along with Cordelia!

Slowly, she crept down the stairs, watching the massive pillow fight that had begun, thinking, He forgot about me so easily... She fought the urge to cry.

"So, what's your big news, G-man?" Xander asked after Cordy took the record off of the turntable.

"I am." Buffy said softly.

"Oh my god," Willow whispered.

"Buffy!" Shouted Xander in surprise.

"What?" said Oz and Cordelia in unison.

And then, Willow and Xander rushed Buffy, tackling her to the floor with shrieks and shouts of happiness, as Cordelia and Oz watched. Giles smiled.

His family was reunited again.

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