The world's longest political quiz.

Just in case you don't know which answer is libertarian enough, research this site.

• The mass of panics and recessions during the Laissez-faire era of ~1870-1900 were due to hoaxes by historians, or government coverup?

• Which should be legalized first, nuclear weapons, or biological ones?

• Welfare is evil and traps people in poverty or can be taken care of by charity?

• Do you have as many guns as you need but not as many as you want, or more guns than you need but not as many as you want?

• What you do in your bedroom, even if it's with children, is nobody's business, except with Clinton, because Clinton didn't get permission from the cigar company, or because it didn't involve children?

• Is slavery a privilege or a right?

• Which is better proof of meritocracy: inheritance or the lottery?

• Do you consider yourself more of a heavily armed fanatic, of a fanatic who just happens to be heavily armed?

• Starving babies: wussy whiners, or wimps who can't take it?

• Who's the greatest president of all time, Nixon or Reagan?

• The title of your life's book: _I told you so_ or _See, I told you so_?

• Is the glass half empty or half empty?

• Would you rather have four shotguns or two double-barreled shotguns?

• If you could sell your soul to be rich, would you like that money in gold or cash?

• Has the government made a secret deal with international Satanists, or have international Satanists made a deal with the government?

• People who want to violently overthrow the government are your friends, or your pals?

• Incendiary ammunition or Armor-piercing?

• Do you consider yourself a pacifist because you want the pentagon privatized, or because you already own smuggled Russian H-bombs?

• Donald Trump: Prez in 2002 or bigger than Jesus?

• I dislike Ike because he wasted tax money on highways, or because he was against state's rights (when he helped the (boo! hiss!) civil rights movement)

• Rich people: oppressed minority or mighty heros?

• Equality would be boring, or dull?
• Incentive: money for success, or slavery for failure?

• Taxes: thievery, or theft?

• Are more for states rights, or pro-states rights?

• All of our problems will be taken care of by unpredicted technical advances, or slave labour?

• Political correctness: Satan at work, or big government conspiracy?

• Do you prefer mortars or bazookas?

• If you could own Britain or the United kingdom, which would you choose?

• Do you use your children for pornography or prostitution?

• Which is the world's best movie: _The Green Barets_ or _The Longest Day_?

• Liberals: confused wanderers or bile-soaked maniacs?

• Should all employees who can't keep up their quota be shot or strangled?

• 1812 was in the 18th century or 17th century?

• Are non-gun-owners stupid or dumb?

• Is world starvation a hoax or fraud?

• The basis of all human rights is: property or ownership?

• Environmentalists are plotting to kill the world, or have they already started?

• Do you prefer a blank slate or a clear one?

• Which is proof that Clinton is the devil, zippergate or whitewater?

• Pepsi-cola or Pepsi?

• Did Ayran Rand die for your sins, or go straight to heaven without being crucified (because Aynalla would never allow something so great to be crucified?

• All environmentalists are leninists, or stalinists?

• Democracy is: how stupid poor people vote their way to riches or a hoax by a worldwide communist conspiracy?

• If you were stuck with either a fat chick or an ugly one, which would you choose?

• Which is more important to privatize: the military or congress?

• The government is covering up Hitler's antarctic UFO bases because they've made a deal with him, or it gives them kicks?

• Do you prefer competitions or contests?

• When caught off guard, you scream "send lawyers guns and money!" or just start shooting?

• Who would you shoot first: a taxman or federal meat inspector?

• The dollar: almighty or all-seeing?

• Altruism is a sign of weakness, or plain evil?

• If you could be a rich man in the USSR or a poor man in the USA, would you vacation at the Black sea or the Baltic? ?

• Is the NRA a bunch of sell-outs, or just half-asses who can't afford bazookas?

• Minimum wages are heinous hell-spawned evil, or big government nasty evil baddy bad-bad?

• Are Pedophiles misunderstood, or mistaken?

• If you could own a thousand slaves, or two thousand workers, would you hire someone to do the whipping?

• The arrival of meat inspectors: an attack, or an assault?

• Would you rather have a life's supply of guns or slaves?

• Is Donald Trump your hero, or idol?

• Star wars: fun fireworks by uncle Sam, or wasteful unless privatized?

• Which do you prefer, anthrax bombs or good old-fashioned H-bombs?

• Do the ends justify the means, or do the means justify the ends?

• Comrade: a nonsense word, or a smear-term?

• Are you in favor of neo-liberalism or classical liberalism?

• Rifle or shotgun?

• Debtor's prison: a hallmark of a civilized civilization, or useful incentive?

• Are you rich or wealthy?

• Vacation choice: Florida or Miami?

• Are you white or Caucasian?

• Are you Aryan or Germanic?

• Child prostitutes are under-worked or over-paid?

• Ayn Rand is God, or the one true demi-god?

• Rigid Ideology: good, or great?

• If your employee broke a contracts, would you kill them by freezing or cooking?

• Have-nots: whiners, or wussies?

• Government: waste of money, or economic burden?

• Does money have a soul or a spirit?

• Feminazis make you sick, or ill?

• Does money talk, or does it speak?

More to come, when I feel sick and perverse enough....

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