Page 2 of Bwana Don's Abrasive Jokes!

This older priest, Father Bill, was breaking in a new priest, Father Frank, who was ready to give his first sermon. Sunday came, and Father Frank gave the sermon. Afterwards Fr. Frank asked how he did. Fr. Bill stated, "You were a little stiff and nervous. Next week try drinking a little of the Communion wine before your sermon to help yourself relax". So the next week, before delivering his sermon, Fr. Frank partook in a little of the wine. He still didn't feel relaxed enough yet, so he drank still a little more of the wine, and then more again. He then gave his sermon. Afterwards, Fr. Bill told Fr. Frank, "You did better, but perhaps the wine relaxed you a little too much. Here's a few of your mistakes to correct for next week: There are twelve disciples, not ten, there are ten commandments, not twelve. Jesus's parents were not Peter, Paul, and Mary. We do not refer to the Holy Trinity as Big Daddy, Junior, and Spook. We also don't refer to Jesus as the Late Great J.C. And finally, there's going to be a taffy pulling contest next Saturday at Saint Peter's, not a peter pulling contest at Saint Taffy's!"

Q. How do you keep a no good, stupid asshole in suspense?
A. I think I'll tell you tomorrow!

Q. What do bosses and diapers have in common?
A. They're always on your ass and usually full of shit!

Remember the seven dirty words that George Carlin said that you can never say on TV. Well, things changed a bit since then, now you can get away with it on HBO. The words are slowly creeping into regular television. But once they allow them all on regular TV, won't it be fun for whovever's writing the closed caption scripts? I'll be the first in line for that job!

An Asian man and an American man were having a discussion about tea. "In my country" stated the Asian, "we have three kinds of tea. We have green tea, mostly aroma and little body. We have black tea, lots of body, but not much aroma, and we have a special blend, about half and half, the tea I like best". "How small the world is", quips the American, "In America we also have three kinds of tea. We have the Effy art tea, which is little body, mostly aroma, we have the Ess H. Eye tea, which is mostly body, but still plenty of aroma, and we have see you when tea, which is about fifty - fifty and the tea I like best."

Click for a off-site link to the Pennsylvania, er, I mean, West Virginia, er, I mean ARKANSAS STATE RESIDENCY APPLICATION. You may be required to fill out a SECOND APPLICATION HERE.

Or you can instead use this off-site application to join the MAFIA.

CLICK HERE TO SEE SOMETHING REALLY DIS-GUST-ING (animated-let load)

You made it this far into my site, so I have a reward for ya below:



Yes, it's CYBERDORK! Graphic above is animated, and a bit raunchy, let load. Click above graphic for more adventures of Cyberdork!

CLICK HERE to find out why you should never mix Rogaine and Viagra!

More To Come

BACK

HOME