Akane Phobia By Jose Argao Ranma 1/2 is copyrighted by Rumiko Takahashi "Owwww !", Ranma said as he started to pull himself from the pavement. He had a splitting headache, his vision was blurred, and he had an itch on his back that he has been dying to scratch for quite some time. or the third time, he tried to scratch his back, but found that his hands were still not responding to him properly. "How did I get here?" He thought to himself. "Oh yeah, I went home from school. It was late because Ms. Ninomiya put me in detention again. Why do I always have to end up there. It's not as if I want Kunou to challenge me every other day. Or was that everyday, it hurts to think about it. Damn it, it hurts to think, period!! Where was I? Oh yeah I went home and started practicing some katas in the dojo. Akane joined in and we had a little match. She was as slow as ever, telegraphing her moves like she was the Western Union. Then Shampoo suddenly broke through the wall and glomped onto me. Needless to say, Akane was pissed. A lot. I think I can remember the hammer as it was flying to my face, and the next thing I know here I am, walking... no, more like crawling to Dr. Tofu's. " It was already very late when Ranma finally got to the Tendo residence. As he entered the door and headed to his futon, a strange feeling came over him. He felt sick to his stomach. He started to sweat profusely. He felt cold. He felt.... afraid. "No", he said to himself "I'm not afraid of anything. I must have just hit my head harder than I thought. Someday I swear that Kawaiikune tomboy is gonna kill me with her violent urges". For some strange reason, when he thought about Akane, the coldness in him felt as if it had doubled. But he was already too tired to think. He just lay down and went to sleep, dreaming of flying through the air with hundreds of hammers flying at him from all directions. He did not feel any better when he went to breakfast that morning. Mr. Tendo was reading his paper, his dad was busy being a panda in the corner, Nabiki was busy writing something in a notebook, Kasumi was in the kitchen, and Akane hadn't gotten up yet. He started eating his rice, quickly, as if in a hurry. He couldn't understand why, but he wanted to get out of that place. He wanted to get out of there fast, it was as if some strange force was compelling him to move as quickly as he could. " G'morning everyone", someone said from the top of stairs. Suddenly, Ranma was again racked by the same feeling he had last night. But this time it felt as if it had multiplied a hundred fold. "What's happening to me?" he thought. "Why am I feeling like this, Why am...". But Ranma was unable to finish that last thought. The moment he laid eyes on Akane all reason left his mind. He could think about nothing. Nothing except to run. Where? Anywhere!!!, as long as it isn't here. He got up and bolted for the gate, jumped over it, and ran for his life. "Oh my, I hope Ranma will be OK", Kasumi remarked, "He left his lunch". "RANMA NO BAKA!!!", Akane shouted. "He must have done something again. I swear, when he gets back here he is DEAD!!!". "Where am I?" Ranma asked himself when he was finally able to think. "What made me come here? No, wait, nothing made me come here. I could have gone anywhere and I wouldn't have cared. No, it's not that something made me come here, it's that something made me leave the dojo. I better go to Doctor Tofu's and get myself checked again. No telling what's happening to me". "You just had to run eh?" Doctor Tofu said. "When exactly did you get these feelings, Ranma. Can you describe today's events to me in detail?" Doctor Tofu listened intently as Ranma recounted the events of the day. He suddenly stopped when Ranma mentioned Akane going down the stairs. "I think I've got it!!!" He said. He suddenly stood up and started flipping through the pages of a book. "I think I know what's wrong with you Ranma.". "Really, what?" "Ranma, you see, all animals have an instinct called the fight or flight instinct. It automatically activates when the animal is in danger. It forces the animal to quickly make a decision on whether to fight the danger or flee from it. This instinct is also present in humans. I think that your subconscious mind has associated Akane with danger and triggers the fight or flight instinct whenever you see her." "That's right!!!" Ranma exclaimed. "and since I never fight women, my mind always chooses flight. So doc, how am I gonna be cured?" Doctor Tofu looked worried. "Ranma, I'm not really sure that you can be cured. The subconscious is a hard thing to tinker with, and trying to treat you the wrong way might even aggravate the situation. I'll try looking for a way to cure you but in the meantime, I suggest that you move out of the Tendo's for a while." "So, husband afraid of violent pervert girl. This is Shampoo's chance!!" Shampoo thought to herself as she listened to the conversation from the window. "Is good thing Shampoo always keep watch on husband. Great-grandmother will want to hear about this. Aiyah!! Soon Ranma, you will be Shampoo's husband officially" And she headed off in the direction of the Nekohanten. "Akane, why isn't Ranma here? Is he sick?" Ukyo asked Akane at lunch. She had noticed that his seat was empty and had spent all morning worrying about him. "Yeah!!!", Akane said "He's sick alright. He's a sick, perverted, insensitive jerk!!!". "That's not what I meant Akane" Ukyo said. She wanted to send Akane into orbit for what she said about Ranma, but she needed the information and did not have the money to buy it from Nabiki. "What I meant was, is Ranma ill?" "I don't know. He was acting normal this morning, or so dad told me. But the moment I came down He just got up and started running. I don't know what's gotten into him. I wouldn't worry about him ,though. He's probably just at the Nekohanten trying to con Shampoo into giving him another free meal, the nerve. He can be so perverted sometimes....." But Ukyo wasn't listening to Akane anymore. The thought of Ranchan, HER Ranchan in Shampoo's arms was making her see red. "That chinese bimbo better not lay a hand on my Ranchan" she fumed as she ran towards the Nekohanten, determined to take back what was rightfully hers. The Nekohanten was strangely quiet as Ukyo reached it. "That's strange" She thought as she positioned herself beside a window, one hand poised at her battle spatula. "So, son-in-law has developed a fear of Akane eh?" Cologne was saying." "Yes, Shampoo hear with own two eyes" "Well then, there's no time to waste, we must act quickly before word of this gets around too far." Cologne's mind was already scheming on how best to take advantage of the situation. "Whose there" she suddenly shouted, whirling around to face the window. "Uh oh, time to go." Ukyo thought "So, that's why Ranchan ran from Akane this morning. It must be really hard for him. He probably needs someone to help him right now. He might even need a place to stay." She couldn't help but giggle as she thought of spending time with Ranma. She was sure that if he would just give her a chance, she could prove to him that she is the most logical choice of all. "Son, is there anything else that you feel you need to tell me?" Soun was crying when he saw Ranma all packed up and ready to go. "It's nothing. I've already explained the situation to you. I'm sick and I need to stay away from Akane for a while, so I have to leave." "Goodbye, son" the panda wrote on a sign. "Hey, just what do you think your doing, you have to go too you know!!!" Ranma shouted at his father. "But Kasume is making my favorite tonight!!!" the panda frantically wrote. "Don't give me that, it doesn't matter what Kasumi is cooking tonight. If I go, you go. Don't you ever think about anything besides your stomach?!!" Ranma started pulling his father by the ear. "Save me some food" the panda finally wrote on the sign before reluctantly following his son outside. When he came to see him, Doctor Tofu didn't have any good news, so Ranma just started walking. It wasn't until he had been walking for sometime that Ranma finally realized that he didn't have a place to stay. So he just went to his favorite place under the bridge. He set up the tent, tossed in his now sleeping father, and started cooking dinner. "What have I gotten into now" he thought. "I've never experienced being this afraid of anything in my life. It's as if I can't control my actions. If I can't be cured, I can't marry Akane, and if I can't do that, It would ruin the Saotome family honor. Yeah right, as if there's any of that honor left after everything oyaji has done. And what will happen when my enemies hear about this, what if Ryouga or kunou were to find out about my, condition." Ranma was suddenly awakened from his thoughts when he smelled something burning."Oh man, my dinner is ruined!!!", he said out loud. "This looks like something Akane would make", he thought to himself as he examined the burned mess."Except it isn't strangely writhing as if it were alive." Ranma was about to start cleaning up the mess when he heard something move. Dropping into a defensive stance, he looked around the area until he found what he was looking for. "You shouldn't sneak up on me like that, you know." He said as he looked straight at the bushes in front of him. "So son-in-law, you manage to see through yet another one of my illusions" Cologne said as she hopped out of her hiding place. "You are getting better and better everyday. You are in need of lodgings, are you not. I am here to offer you a room in exchange for working at the Nekohanten." "Thanks, but no thanks" Ranma replied. "I have no intentions of making myself a target for you all day, everyday." Cologne felt it was time to bring out the big guns "I can cure your condition." she said. That got Ranma's attention. "You can, but... wait, I thought you wanted me to marry Shampoo. Why are you helping me all of a sudden." "Shampoo's husband must be strong and courageous. It simply wouldn't do to have him running away at the sight of a mere girl. Besides, Shampoo asked it of me, how can I refuse her. "Alright" Ranma said "I'll go". "Wait just one minute," Ukyo said from the top of the bridge. "If Ranma's gonna be staying anywhere tonight, it's gonna be at my place, isn't that right Ranchan?." "Ukyo," Ranma began. "I'm sorry but I need to get cured and right now the only way for that to happen is if I stay with Cologne" "But.... but Ranchan, you don't need a cure, you don't need Akane. Can't you see that you already have me?." "I know that, Ucchan, but I've never run away from any problem in my life, and I don't plan to start now. I hope you understand." "Alright", Ukyou looked as if she were about to cry, but tried her best to hide it. "If that's how you feel, I understand." Ukyou turned and ran. She didn't want Ranma to see her that way. She didn't want him to see her crying. Back at the bridge, Ranma had gathered up his belongings and prepared to leave. For a moment he considered waking up his father and bringing him along but decided against it, thinking that after his attitude that afternoon, he deserved to go hungry for a few days. "Let us go son-in-law" Cologne said. "Yeah, yeah" Ranma slowly got up and followed her. When they arrived, Shampoo glomped onto him the moment he entered. "Aiyah, Ranma come to live with Shampoo. Shampoo so happy." "Shampoo, can't we just talk tommorrow? I just want to go to bed." "But.. Shampoo thought that Ranma would at least wait until honeymoon before that, but since Ranma insist..."Shampoo began to unbutton her shirt. "Nooooo, no, I didn't mean it like that. I meant go to sleep" "Alright, but it Ranma's loss" Shampoo said as she went out of the room. "That was close, I'd better be on my toes around here " he thought as he lay down. He had only closed his eyes for a few minutes when the door opened again. "Who...?" he thought . "Shampoo bring too, too delicious dinner for Ranma" Shampoo said as she went inside. Shampoo also bring pill for cure. Ranma just take pill after dinner for two weeks and fear of violent pervert girl go away. Open wide "she said, offering a taste of the ramen. "I can feed myself, thank you." Ranma answered as he started digging in. After eating, he pretended to take the pill but kept it in his hand. "Better let Doctor Tofu have a look at this before I try it" Ranma thought. He was about to go to sleep when he realized that Shampoo wasn't going anywhere. "Uh, Shampoo, aren't you gonna go to sleep anytime now?" "Aiyah!!, Shampoo forgot all about time. Shampoo and Ranma go to sleep now." Shampoo started to lie down. "Hey, wait a minute, just what are you trying to do." "Shampoo is Ranma's wife. Wife sleep with husband, that is law" "But...but...but..." "No buts, if Ranma want cure, Ranma sleep beside Shampoo" "Alright, alright, but don't get any funny ideas okay?" "Yes, Shampoo behave herself." "Man, " Ranma thought, "the things I go through for a cure" The next day proved tiring, to say the least. In his hurry to get away from Shampoo, he left his lunch. He could not eat lunch with Akane, for obvious reasons, and missed Kasumi's cooking. He was lucky Ukyou was there to give him some okunomiyaki. After school, where it was all he could do to avoid Akane all day, Kunou challenged him to a fight. "Ranma Saotome, I intend to free the beauteous Akane Tendo and my pigtailed goddess from your vile clutches." "I guess it would help relieve some stress" Ranma thought as he prepared to fight. About three minutes into the fight, Mousse suddenly appeared. "Ranma Saotome, how dare you trick Shampoo into sleeping with you last night" At that point the crowd suddenly went quiet. Slowly, the students were all crowding around Ranma. "Did you hear that", one student said "Ranma slept with Shampoo". "Man, that guy hasn't got any shame, does he". "That Ranma is such a pervert, sleeping with Shampoo when he's engaged to Akane." "Wait!!!" Ranma shouted "It's not like that at all, I just slept, that's all I did, sleep!!!" "Silence!!!" Mousse shouted "I have no need of your excuses, face my wrath Ranma Saotome. YAAAAH!!!" Mousse let loose with a barrage of chains, blades, swords, chairs, tables, showers, and kitchen sinks, hitting a statue of Principal Kuno. The Chains of his weapons soon bacame tangled up as he shouted "Let go of my weapons, Saotome. I'm warning you, your actions are only making me even more furious. Well, answer me!!! You dare insult me with silence!!! Answer me Saotome, answer me!!! "Pathetic" Ranma thought as he watched the blind martial artist try to talk to the statue. Suddenly, he heard another voice. "Have you no shame, Saotome?!! Not only have you entrenched Akane Tendo and my pig-tailed goddess in your wicked sorcery, you would have the gall to sleep with Shampoo at the same time?!! DIE!!!" Ranma quickly got out of the way of the attack and proceeded to send Kunou into orbit. When he went to Doctor Tofu's, the doc still hasn't found a cure for him. He did take a look at the pill Shampoo gave him, however, and said that it was made of harmless herbs. He couldn't figure out how the herbs were supposed to work but said that it would be safe for Ranma to take them. At the Nekohanten, Ranma was forced to change into a girl to work as a waitress. The old ghoul worked him into the ground, throwing orders at him until they splash him, to the delight of the customers. and when dinnertime finally came, he ate his ramen quickly and took his pill. He had just enough energy left in him to change and go to sleep. Ukyou watched this continue for three days. On third evening, she decided to do something about it. She went to the Nekohanten and was surprised to find that the lights were on. She positioned herself beside a window to hear what was going on. She heard two voices talking. "Is he taking the drug, child?" Cologne asked. "Yes, Ranma ask Doctor about pill, but he no realize that the real drug is in food" "Yes my child, Ranma's condition is such a blessing to us. A few more days of this and he shall be ours." "But great-grandmother, Ranma no change since Ranma take pill. Maybe pill no work?" "Have faith in it, child. It will show no effects until a few days later. Until then, Ranma must not miss even a single dose or all our efforts will be useless." "No worry great-grandmother, Shampoo make sure". Ukyou was shocked at what she heard. "I knew that purple headed hussy was up to something, and here they have Ranchan completely fooled that they're giving him a cure. Well, they're not going to succeed. Not if I have anything to do about it. The next day at lunch, Ukyou told Ranma all that she had heard. "So, the drugs have been in the ramen all along. I should have known they'd try something like this." Ranma was visibly very angry. "Don't worry Ranchan, all you have to do is miss one dose and it won't work at all" "Is that so?." "Well, that's a relief" That night, Shampoo was surprised to see that Ranma had not returned. When she went to his room, his things were'nt there anymore. All that was left was a note telling her that Ranma had found out about her plans. Angry and disappointed, she told Cologne. "Son-in-law or not, he has given us enough trouble already. Since our methods do not seem to be working, we simply must take him by force. But he is too good, and he has that girl with the giant spatula on her, we need an ally to tip the odds in our favor" Suddenly, the doors of the refrigerator flew open. Ryoga stepped out from inside saying "Hey, this doesn't look like Okinawa!!!" Cologne had an idea and said to him "Ryoga, how would you like to get Ranma out of your life forever?" At the mention of Ranma's name, Ryoga became alert "Yeah, I'm listening." Elsewhere that night, Ukyou was starting to close up the Ucchans when someone knocked on the door. "Were already closed, come back tommorrow!!!" she yelled. "It's me, Ranma." The voice answered. "Ranchan, what are you doing here?" x"I need a place to stay, I was wondering if your offer was still standing. " "Don't be silly Ranchan, of course it is. Let me help you with your stuff." "Do you have anything to eat?" "Wait just a minute, I'll cook something up" A few days later, Ukyou could hardly sleep. She remembered how Ranma ate her okunomiyaki. "He really likes my cooking!!!" she thought to herself. "A few more days of this and he'll finally realize that I am the best choice for him. Her thoughts were interrupted by a sudden explosion. "That came from Ranchan's xroom" she realized. She hurriedly took her spatula and went to Ranma's room. She was terrified to see a huge hole in the wall and started looking for Ranma. Then she heard sounds coming from outside. She looked out the hole and saw Ranma locked in combat with Shampoo and Ryoga. She jumped at Shampoo and shouted "You ain't gettin Ranchan from me that easy" The two started fighting and thrashed the place, though neither could get any good hits in the other since they were pretty much evenly matched. "Bakutsai Denketsu!!!" Ryoga shouted, breaking the rock Ranma was standing on into pieces. "Damn, he's gotten faster. The old ghoul's probably been training him" Ranma thought. "It's time to get serious" "Kachu Tenshin Amaguriken!!!" he shouted. Instinctively, Ryoga jumped into the air, "Let's see you hit me with your chestnut fist here Ranma!!!". "Who said I was gonna do the chestnut fist? Eat this bacon breath, HIRYU SHOTEN- HA!!!" The blast hit Ryoga hard, but his training with Cologne allowed him to get back up. "Want some more eh? Huh?!!" Ranma suddenly realized that his whole body was tied up. "Hey!!! What's going on here!!!" Cologne suddenly appeared from nowhere and said "You shouldn't have been so still during the shoten-ha, tying you up became too easy." "This is where I pay you back for all the suffering you've given me, Ranma." Ryoga shouted. "Ryoga, what is the meaning of thi...mmmph" Cologne couldn't move as she suddenly found herself surrounded by chains. "You should take your own advice" Mousse said, stepping out of the shadows. "Ryoga, get him now". "Yes" Ryoga nodded. He slowly got ready for his most powerful attack. "SHI!!!" The sound startled Shampoo and Ukyou. They knew that sound, and they knew what it meant. They both spun around to see that Ranma was tied up, and so was Cologne. They both ran towards Ranma. "Hey, lost boy, deal to capture Ranma, not kill him" Shampoo shouted at Ryoga. "So I lied" Ryoga thought. "CHI!!!" Ukyou knew that time was running out. She frantically tried to free Ranma, but his bonds were so strong. " Unggh" Cologne was finally able to escape the chains. She wasn't an amazon elder for nothing. "Damn you Mousse, you traitor!!!" she shouted as she used the chestnut fist to pummel him into oblivion. "HOKODAN!!!" At the last second, Ukyou and Shampoo managed to free Ranma. Ukyou was able to escape with Ranma to safety, but Shampoo found herself unable to move, staring transfixed at the huge blast. Suddenly, she found herself surrounded by chains and pulled to safety. She looked up to see Mousse. Because he had lowered his defenses to save her, he was now getting pumelled by Cologne. "You can never have Shampoo, you are too weak!!!" she shouted at Mousse. At those words, all reason left Mousse. He lashed out at Cologne with a barrage of hundreds of bladed weapons. Stunned by his sudden increase in speed, Cologne was unable to deflect them all and found herself trapped, wrapped up in kilometers of chain. She looked up to see a smiling Mousse. "Who was weak again?" "I will never surrender to you" she hissed at Mousse. "It no use Great Grandmother, Mousse won. We must yield" Shampoo said, realizing the hopelessness of the situation. Mousse was in a rage. Even if she were to help her grandmother, she would surely lose as well. "I will marry you, Mousse. Just let Great Grandmother go" "You're off the hook" Mousse said as he let Cologne go. Shampoo couldn't believe what she had just heard. "What?!!" "I said you're off the hook, you don't have to marry me if you don't want to. I won't tell anyone about my win today." Mousse knew he would regret this afterwards, but he couldn't the thought of Shampoo being married to him just because she was forced to. Shampoo looked at Mousse, for the first time seeing not a pathetic coward who was always following her around, but a man who would give up his own happiness for hers. Cologne couldn't believe her ears. She had resigned herself to a fate of being ridiculed as an elder defeated by a man. Mousse, no less. "There may be hope for him yet" She thought to herself, remembering how he had single-handedly defeated her. Ranma saw Cologne approach him and got into a stance but Cologne said "There is no need for that, Ranma. You have won this battle. Remember, though, that you have not won the war. We will be back. As for your reward for winning, I will tell you the meaning of your condition. There is no actual cure for it, but if you can convince yourself that you are not endangering yourself in her presence, you will be alright." As Ranma and Ukyou prepared to leave, they heard a low moaning sound. They turned to see Ryoga, completely spent after his attack. "He's in bad shape" Ranma said as he looked at Ukyou "If we leave him like this, we won't be much better than he is." Ukyou finally said. So they took him to a hospital. The doctors informed them that Ryoga needed a blood transfusion badly or he might die. The problem was they didn't have any blood on hand of the right type. Ranma and Ukyou both offered their own blood but the tests showed that only Ranma had a matching type. So, Ranma gave Ryoga, the man who tried to kill him, his own blood that he might live. The next day, Ranma left the restaurant early. He walked to the Tendo residence and knocked on the door. Kasumi answered. "Oh, hi Ranma. Are you feeling better?" "Uh.. yeah, I guess. Is Akane home?" "She's in her room" The room was quiet as Ranma entered it. He saw that Akane was lying on the bed. Immediately he was gripped by fear. He suppressed his overwhelming desire to run by thinking that he hadn't done anything wrong and so had nothing to fear from Akane. "Akane," he began. Akane cut him off from continuing. "You don't have to explain to me Ranma, Nabiki told me everything. So, what do you think we should do?" "I'm sorry Akane, I really like you. But as long as you're my fiance, I'll always be afraid of doing something to hurt you. I don't think we can continue like this" "I know what you mean. I don't think it would have worked out anyway. At the rate we were going, we would've killed each other in less than a year. I guess it's better this way, Ranma. I hope we can still be friends. Ranma? ... Ranma?" She looked at Ranma, who had gotten completely stiff. "Honestly" she thought to herself. "Here I am letting him off the hook and he's fainted from fear. What a jerk!!!" Ukyou hadn't seen Ranma the whole day. She was beginning to feel really lonely and started closing the restaurant early when she heard a knock on the door. "Were already closed, come back tommorrow" she shouted. "It's me, Ranma" Ukyou stood up and let Ranma in. "We need to talk" Ranma said. Gesturing for Ukyou to sit with him, he began, "Ucchan, I've been doing a lot of thinking lately. About you, about me. About us. " Ukyou couldn't believe what she was hearing. "Could it be" she thought,"After all this time has he finally realized the truth?" "Of all my fiances, you are the one who was most caring. You always heard me out and understood my explanation whenever I upset you. You help me even if you know I don't deserve it. You're the only one who loved me... unconditionally." "This is pretty awkward for me" Ranma continued "I guess what I'm trying to say is that I... I... I...lo..ve... you. I love you Ucchan, will you marry me?" "I can't believe it!!! Ukyou thought, "I...uh... of course Ranchan, of course I will. I would love to marry you." She gave Ranma a hug. She tried to keep from crying, but the tears kept falling anyway. She had her dream, she had Ranchan, and all was well. Then, she looked up to find him looking at her. They kept looking at each other like this for a while, then, they kissed. Mr. Tendo did not take the news of Ranma's impending wedding to Ukyou very well. He tried to force Ranma to take it back. However, Ukyou's engagement to Ranma was valid. He had to admit that at the end. As for Akane, they decided to just be friends. For some reason, Shampoo did not seem too disappointed at all when she heard the news. At Akane's insistence, the whole Tendo family attended Ranma's wedding. Ukyou looked absolutely beautiful in her dress. And when the time came to kiss the bride, the guests were not disappointed by the show. Mr. Tendo was crying the whole time, however, and went outside because he could not bear to see the last chance of uniting the Saotome and Tendo schools of martial arts slipping from his hands. He reached for his hanky but found that it was already soaked. A man beside him handed him a black and yellow bandanna. "Here Mr. Tendo, you look like you need one." "Thank you Ryoga " Mr. Tendo said "What are you doing outside? Aren't you going to watch the wedding?" "I did not really plan to attend. I just sorta wandered here. I couldn't bear to look at Ranma. I would be dead by now if it were not for the blood transfusion I got from him I have tried to kill him and now I owe him my life. I have brought shame on myself. Frankly, I have no idea what I'll do after this." Soun suddenly looked up "A transfusion you say? Ranma gave you his blood? Saotome blood flows through your veins?" "Yes sir, why do you ask?" "Tell me son, have you ever considered running a dojo in the future...... Prolog Author rambling on: This is my first fanfic. Well, the first one I posted anyway. English is not my first language so there are bound to be some mistakes. Okay, a lot of them. Anyway C&C, flames, suggestions, millions of dollars in cash, that pretty womanhood video I can't seem to find anywhere, and demands that I lay down my pen (keyboard????) and never write again are welcome. Send them to ex_fuk@yahoo.com. Thanks.