Bad Day?

~ Your horn sticks on the freeway behind 32 Hell's Angels.
~ You've been at work 3 hours before you notice that your fly is open.
~ Your twin sister forgets your birthday.
~ Your birthday cake collapses from the weight of the candles.
~ You have to sit down to brush your teeth in the morning.
~ Everyone avoids you the morning after the company office party.
~ Your income tax refund check bounces.
~ It costs more to fill up your car than it did to buy it.
~ The bird singing outside your window is a vulture.
~ You wake up and your braces are stuck together.
~ Your blind date turns out to be your ex.
~ You put both contacts in the same eye.
~ Your mother approves of the person you are dating.
~ Your doctor tells you that you're allergic to chocolate.
~ You have to borrow from your Visa card to pay your MasterCard.
~ Nothing you own is actually paid for.
~ Everyone loves your driver's license picture.
~ The health inspector condemns your office coffee maker.
~ You invite the peeping Tom in . . . and he says no.
~ The Gypsy fortune teller offers to refund your money.
~ People think that you're 40 and you're only 35.
~ You call your Mom and tell her that you'd like to eat out tonight and when you get home, there's a sandwich on the front porch.
~ You start to put on the clothes that you wore home from the party last night . . . and there aren't any.