Valentines' Day: Not Like it Used To Be
February 14 is Valentine's Day. Although it is celebrated as a lovers' holiday today, with the giving of candy, flowers, or other gifts between couples in love, it originated in 5th Century Rome as a tribute to St. Valentine, a Catholic bishop.
For eight hundred years prior to the establishment of Valentine's Day, the Romans had practiced a pagan celebration in mid-February commemorating young men's rite of passage to the god Lupercus. The celebration featured a lottery in which young men would draw the names of teenage girls from a box. The girl assigned to each young man in that manner would be his sexual companion during the remaining year.
In an effort to do away with the pagan festival, Pope Gelasius ordered a slight change in the lottery. Instead of the names of young women, the box would contain the names of saints. Both
men and women were allowed to draw from the box, and the game was to emulate the ways of the saint they drew during the rest of the year. Needless to say, many of the young Roman men were not too pleased with the rule changes.
Instead of the pagan god Lupercus, the Church looked for a suitable patron saint of love to take his place. They found an appropriate choice in Valentine, who, in AD 270 had been beheaded by Emperor Claudius.
Claudius had determined that Married men made poor soldiers. So he banned marriage from his empire. But Valentine would secretly marry young men that came to him. When Claudius
found out about Valentine, he first tried to convert him to paganism. But Valentine reversed the strategy, trying instead to convert Claudius. When he failed, he was stoned and beheaded.
During the days that Valentine was imprisoned, he fell in love with the blind daughter of his jailer. His love for her, and his great faith, managed to miraculously heal her from her blindness before his death. Before he was taken to his death, he signed a
farewell message to her, "From your Valentine." The phrase has been used on his day ever since.
Although the lottery for women had been banned by the church, the mid-February holiday in commemoration of St. Valentine was stilled used by Roman men to seek the affection of women. It
became a tradition for the men to give the ones they admired handwritten messages of affection, containing Valentine's name.
The first Valentine card grew out of this practice. The first true Valentine card was sent in 1415 by Charles, duke of Orleans, to his wife. He was imprisoned in the Tower of London at the time.
Cupid, another symbol of the holiday, became associated with it because he was the son of Venus, the Roman god of love and beauty. Cupid often appears on Valentine cards.
Love is a slow kiss goodnight. It`s anticipation...Love is an imperfection in yourself not bothering you. It's acceptance. Love is passing up an opportunity because the time isn't right yet. It's patience. Love is a back massage that starts above the hairline and ends around the insoles. It's exploration. Love is not having to say "Let's make love," because you know what the other person wants. It's understanding.
Love is being given an honest chance to say no when you thought you were committed. It's consideration. Love is both of you remembering protection. It's responsibility. Love is saying the perfect phrase to make a solemn embrace dissolve into giggles. It's humor. Love is being told "Stop and I'll
kill you" It's desire...Love is reviewing the damage to your living room and realizing personal effects are strewn in a clockwise pattern from the front door to the bedroom. It's abandonment. Love is seeing what your lover really looks like for the first time. It's truth. Love is knowing what time it is and not caring. It's joy. Love is the arms around you tightening their embrace.
It's ecstasy. Love is seeing a new side of a person you thought you knew. It's renewal...Love is telling a person if you have to leave, you will let them sleep, and being told they would rather be woken...It's tenderness. Love is waking up to find the subject of the dream you were having asleep on your shoulder. It's where fantasy meets reality. Love is being there to wake your lover. Slowly. It's sensuousness. Love is belatedly knowing why you bothered to buy a queen-sized bed three years ago. It's practicality. Love is two people only taking up a third of a queen-sized bed. It's closeness. Love is knowing you gave the extra set of keys to your apartment to the right person. It's trust. Love is saying good-bye and knowing you will be back by mutual consent. It's faith. Love is stretching your arms and discovering the real meaning of the word "sore". It's a lesson in human frailty. Love is opening your medicine cabinet and finding your tube of toothpaste turned into a pretzel. It's adaptation. Love is sitting at the window, looking out and remembering who you were with the night before. It's reflection.
Love is hearing the weather forecast for a winter storm and wishing you could spend it in bed with your lover. It's loneliness. Love is stories that will never be told...It's personal. Love is a slow kiss goodnight.
....unknown author....
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