OUTLINE OF DOMESTIC ABUSE
What is battering?

Battering is a pattern of behavior used to establish power and control over another person through fear and intimidation, often including the threat or use of violence. Battering happens when one person believes they are entitled to control another. Assault, battering and domestic violence are crimes.
Definitions: Abuse of family members can take many forms. Battering may include emotional abuse, economic abuse, sexual abuse, using children, threats, using male privilege, intimidation, isolation, and a variety of other behaviors used to maintain fear, intimidation and power. In all cultures, the perpetrators are most commonly the men of the family. Women are most commonly the victims of violence. Elder and child abuse are also prevalent. Acts of domestic violence generally fall into one or more of the following categories:
  • Physical Battering - The abuser's physical attacks or aggressive behavior can range from bruising to murder. It often begins with what is excused as trivial contacts, which escalate into more frequent and serious attacks.
  • Sexual Abuse - Physical attack by the abuser is often accompanied by, or culminates in, sexual violence wherein the woman is forced to have sexual intercourse with her abuser or take part in unwanted sexual activity.
  • Psychological Battering -The abuser's psychological or mental violence can include constant verbal abuse, harassment, excessive possessiveness, isolating the woman from friends and family, deprivation of physical and economic resources, and destruction of personal property.

Battering escalates. It often begins with behaviors like threats, name calling, violence in her presence (such as punching a fist through a wall), and/or damage to objects or pets. It may escalate to restraining, pushing, slapping, and/or pinching. The battering may include punching, kicking, biting, sexual assault, tripping, throwing. Finally, it may become life threatening with serious behaviors such as choking, breaking bones, or the use of weapons.


Who Is Battered?

Rural and urban women of all religious, ethnic, economic, educational backgrounds, of varying ages, physical abilities, and lifestyles can be affected by domestic violence. There is NOT a "typical woman who will be battered." The risk factor is being born female. Over 50% of all women will experience physical violence in an intimate relationship, and for 24-30% of those women the battering will be regular and on going. EVERY 15 SECONDS THE CRIME OF BATTERING OCCURS.

  • More than 50% of child abductions result from domestic violence. (Geoffery Grief & Rebecca Hagar,"Abduction of Children By Their Parents: A Survey of the Problem," Social Work, 1991)
  • Approximately 1 out of every 25 elderly persons is victimized annually. (Candace Heisler, Journal of Elder Abuse and Neglect, 1991) 22 to 35% of women who visit emergency rooms are there for injuries related to on-going abuse. (Journal of the American Medical Association, 1990) Up to 50% of all homeless women and children in this country are fleeing domestic violence. (Elizabeth Schneider, Legal Reform Efforts for Battered Women, 1990) 5 to 25% of pregnant women are battered. (Evan Stark & Anne Flitcraft, 1992)
  • One out of every four gay couples (25%) experiences domestic violence in their relationship. That's approximately the same rate as heterosexual couples. (Family Violence Prevention Fund, 1996) A study of violence among dating couples of high school age found that 12% had experienced abuse in one of their relationships. (Nona O' Keefe, Karen Brockoff, Esther Chew, "Teen Dating Violence," Social Work, November\December 1986)
  • Sexual abuse against disabled girls and women is roughly twice as high as for non-disabled girls and women. Considering that 33 percent of American women experience domestic violence, a conservative estimate says that at least 60% of disabled women have experienced it. (New Mobility Magazine, 1995) In 1994, 28% of the 4,739 women who were murdered were slain by a husband or boyfriend. (FBI)
  • According to the U.S. Department of Justice, over two-thirds of female victims of violence documented in 1993 were related to or knew their attacker.
  • A 1992 study of family and intimate assaults reported in the Journal of the American Medical Association, found that family and intimate assaults involving firearms are 12 times more likely to result in death than all non-firearm family and intimate assaults.
  • A 1993 study in the New England Journal of Family Medicine revealed that homes experiencing domestic violence were close to five times more likely to be the scene of a homicide than other homes. It also reported that a handgun in the home is 43 times more likely to kill a family member or an acquaintance than an intruder.
  • The Bureau of Justice reports that although divorced and separated women comprise only 7% of the population in the U.S., they account for 75% of all battered women and report being assaulted 14 times more often than women still living with a partner.

If you are being abused or battered, you are not alone. There is help available and people who will understand your situation. Nobody deserves abuse. You and your children have a right to safety.


Getting Help: Safety Planning

If you are still in the relationship:
  1. Think of a safe place to go if an argument occurs - avoid rooms with no exits (bathroom), or rooms with weapons (kitchen).
  2. Think about and make a list of safe people to contact.
  3. Keep change with you at all times.
  4. Memorize all important numbers.
  5. Establish a "code word or sign" so that family, friends, teachers or co-workers know when to call for help.
  6. Think about what you will say to your partner if he\she becomes violent.
  7. Remember you have the right to live without fear and violence.


If you have left the relationship:

  1. Change your phone number.
  2. Screen calls.
  3. Save and document all contacts, messages, injuries or other incidents involving the batterer.
  4. Change locks, if the batterer has a key.
  5. Avoid staying alone.
  6. Plan how to get away if confronted by an abusive partner.
  7. If you have to meet your partner, do it in a public place.
  8. Vary your routine.
  9. Notify school and work contacts.
  10. Call a shelter for battered women.


If you leave the relationship or are thinking of leaving, you should take important papers and documents with you to enable you to apply for benefits or take legal action. Important papers you should take include social security cards and birth certificates for you and your children, your marriage license, leases or deeds in your name or both yours and your partner's names, your checkbook, your charge cards, bank statements and charge account statements, insurance policies, proof of income for you and your spouse (pay stubs or W-2's), and any documentation of past incidents of abuse (photos, police reports, medical records, etc.)


A very special "thank you" to Tammy for her wonderful work on this page!

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