As you all can see, I have not written in my journal for almost a year and I suppose you are wondering where I have been for so long. If you recall,I had written about some concerns of mine in my last journal entry about not seeing the timber wolves and if they had left this mountain for good. Along about this time I also started thinking about something else: Do I ever want to leave these mountains again for good? This thought kept coming to mind frequently,especially when I saw those Spring blossoms popping out of their protective buds and a rabbit or squirrel scampering around after a long winter rest. The presence of Grandmother Sun revives everything alive here; how can I leave it again, never to return? In these mountains you are just a little closer to the light.

I talked to the Creator time and time again, but no answer came. The sadness in my heart remained when I recalled that I had only come back here for a vacation. So, because I could not find the answers here, I decided that I would leave the mountains for awhile to find answers to many questions. This would be my quest to find out where I really belonged and to change my life for the best.

I have been traveling through the mountains of Tennessee and North Carolina to visit places unseen since childhood. It was important to find out if other mountain communities were noticing the same loss of the wolf population and other critters. Maybe the wolves are leaving because too many people are going back to their mountain homes; I sure hoped thats all there was to it, but I had to know. As I traveled, I looked for flora and fauna populations everywhere and noticed that the Mountain Laurel, May Apples and Dogwood were blooming. As the weeks and months passed, I was pleased some times to hear wolves at a distance howling at the moon and I knew that they would be at my mountain too. In some of the more remote places, I saw other critters. A Mountain Lion eyeing my guide and me from a distance, but then vanishing when we got closer. We saw a couple of red foxes, rabbits, squirrels and even a deer and I began to remember the days of my childhood in this very place. My folks used to bring me here to Waynesville, NC to attend the annual Ramp Festival. Now, some of you may not know what ramps are, so I will explain. Ramps are sometimes called Wild Garlic which has a pungent odor coming from you for several days after eating them! Believe it, because it is true. But never have you tasted anything so wonderful with a plate of scrambled eggs and crisp bacon that has been cooked over a fire in the great outdoors. My guide, Lone Wolf, and I stopped here to eat our fill and rest a bit before going on. My heart was happy because I knew that the mountains were still healthy enough to grow those wonderful treats that I loved. Later on we said goodbye to our new friends and thanked them for their hospitality. Before leaving, we filled our water canteens from a cold mountain spring to carry with us. As we continued our journey, we saw fields of green tobacco stalks ripening in the sun and cornstalks that were 6 feet high, heavy laden with ears of succulent corn that are sweet and tender. The vegetable gardens, orchards and fields were bursting with the goodness of Mother Earth in preparation for the food to be put up for the long winter ahead.

Several months into our journey we stopped in Asheville, NC, stayed a few days in a hotel and looked around the city where I had lived for a long time. One thing that I wanted to do here was to visit the Thomas Wolfe Memorial to look at a picture that had hung in the stairwell near the front parlor. It was a picture of my Aunt Nellie in a group picture taken at the Thomas Wolfe House when their class visited. My Aunt Nellie was a beautiful woman and as a young girl, my grandfather had sent her from the mountains to this girl's school.Here, she would be educated in academics and how to be a proper young lady. When we went to visit the museum to take a photograph of the picture on the wall, what we found were the remnants of a serious fire that had done considerable damage to the building and its contents. My heart was so sad to think that I may never see that photograph again,but I will always have that memory with me.

The more we traveled to other counties, small towns and remote areas, I knew where I was supposed to be and that I was going home to my mountains. We saw those corn, tobacco and sugar cane fields ripen and observed farm families working hard to harvest their bounty for the winter.Apple and cherry trees were heavy laden with fruit for drying and canning and the bees were busy making sourwood honey for hot biscuits on a cold morning. Long Man, the river, has called to us each morning to bathe ourselves in the cold water and to then face the four directions in prayer and thanksgiving. The water is getting colder every day and the nights are cold enough to build a fire to stay warm while we rest. Harvest time is over now, and soon, Old Man Winter will visit us with his sparkling white hair and cold breath.

We were getting closer to where Lone Wolf made his home; the terrain was becoming more treacherous every day and traveling was very slow. Some days I would get so tired that I could hardly put a foot in front of the other one. Was this a trial period to test my determination or to change my mind about going home to the mountain to stay? If that is true, then so be it. The way the snow is coming down, I may not make it home before Spring,but with the Creator's help I will get there and at the right time. Lone Wolf is an expert guide, somehow knowing exactly where to step or if to step. He has guarded my safety and welfare and has become a true friend in a time of trial and decision making. After one or two days of dangerous traveling we decided it best to stop at his cabin until the weather broke. As it turned out there were weeks of freezing rain, snow and extremely low temperatures. During this time we talked about our families and where we were in this life's journey. We celebrated Christmas together in his cabin in the wild with all of the wonders of nature around us. The time passed so quickly and almost in the blink of an eye,Spring had arrived.

Lone Wolf told me at one time that he was a widower and had lost his wife to a terrible illness. Now he thought that he needed to leave this house ,because the memories were too painful. Almost at the same time I was thinking that making my home on the mountain would be difficult and I would need help. Successful farming requires a lot of time, energy and plain old muscle and I would need all of the help that I could get to survive. Soon after, I asked Lone Wolf to come back to the mountain with me to work the farm together and to help each other. We would work together, take our meals together, but he must keep to his own quarters otherwise.

This arrangement has worked out well for both of us. After our farm or house work is done we usually visit for awhile after supper and make our plans for the next day. He secures every thing for the night and goes to his quarters. This is the time that I like to quilt, read or talk to the Creator and give thanks for another good day. My heart is light and I am happy.

Many Trails of Tears

Kateri's Cabin

Blessed Kateri Tekakwitha

 

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