RING . . .
RING . . .
CLICK
"Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you
are and what you
want. Just stay on the line so we can trace
the call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully, and
a little voice will
tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter
which number you
press. No one will answer."
