Motherhood...The Lighter Side

A woman invited some people for dinner. At the table, she turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn't know what to say," the little girl replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy say" the mother said. The girl bowed her head and said, "Dear Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"

A mother was listening to her child say his prayers "Dear Harold." At this the mom interrupted and said wait a minute, how come you called God, Harold?" The little boy looked up and said, "That's what they call Him in church." You know the prayer we say, "Our Father who art in Heaven, Harold be Thy name."

One day a space shuttle crashed to the ground in the yard of a preschool. When he finally struggled from the wreckage, the astronaut shouted, "I'm free!! I'm free!!" At this point one of the children that was standing there shouted back, "Big deal, I'm four!"

A Sunday School teacher asked her class, "Does anyone here know what we mean by sins of omission?" A little girl replied: "Aren't those the sins that we were supposed to commit but didn't?"

A little boy went to the store with his grandmother and on the way home he was looking at the things she had purchased. He found a package of pantyhose and began to sound out the words "QUEEN SIZE." He then looked at his grandmother and exclaimed, "Look Grandma, you wear the same size as our waterbed!"

A little girl's essay on parents: "The trouble with parents is that they are so old when we get them that it's hard to change their habits."

The "Joy Of Motherhood": What a woman experiences when all the children are finally in bed.

The only people who are always right about the proper way to raise children? Those who've never had any.