Christian Marriage & Family Topic: Growing Together in Christian Marriage! (Taking Inventory)

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Christian Marriage & Family Monthly Topic Each month a specific topic is chosen regarding Christian Marriage & Family.

This Month's Topic: Divider Line

Christian Marriage & Family Topic #13:Growing Together in Christian Marriage! (Taking Inventory)

"For where two or three
are gathered together in My name,
I am there in the midst of them.

Matthew 18:20

Love does not just happen....
We need to encourage our love for each other in marriage to grow.
We need to nurture that the same love we experienced on our wedding day
so it deepens and matures as each day, month and year passes by.

Your Love in your marriage is a precious gift from God!

I am my beloved's
and my beloved is Mine
Song of Solomon 6:3 Divider Line

Marriage in Christ is three part (Christ, husband & wife)....husband and wife have an obligation to pursue an individual relationship with Christ and to embrace this relationship as the most important one in their lives. This knowledge is then joined in marriage in spirit and body with your mate. Our marital relationship, just as our individual one with the Father, requires much diligence in study so that we may grow in our seeking as to His Will in our lives and our marriage. Marriages that are not nourished with God's Word in "all three parts" will slowly drift until one day you may not even want to feel the love you once gave each other.

Even the seemingly "Good" marriages can fall prey to satan and his bag of tricks that keeps our focus off God in our marriages. Attending to all the world's temptations can break a marriage in half. Not only must we safeguard our homes by keeping God first but we need to periodically sit down with our mates and take inventory! You might be surprised to learn some of your findings!

The following is an inventory we use in our marriage. It is best to try to sit down uninterrupted with your mate every few months and complete this "inventory" together. As a suggestion, it might also be helpful to pray together first that God would help each of you learn something from this exercise and that He might reveal to you both those things that are causing hurt in your relationship.

Each must take a piece of paper and separately answer each question. When you both have completed this part, discuss each question one at a time by revealing your answers together. You can then take the results you find and work on those areas that need attention. Don't forget to joyfully acknowledge one another for those areas that are scored well and perhaps areas of happiness that have brought one another that was previously taken for granted! And finally, end in prayer by rejoicing with Him for your precious love He has given to you both!

Marriage Inventory
Taken in part from "The Joyful Covenant" by Lester & Doris Glick

Score each question individually by the following rating system:

Always.....Most of the Time.....Sometimes.....Rarely.....Never

Do you feel close to your mate? Can you share anything without fear or embarrassment?
Are the happy, meaningful times of your life the times that you share with your spouse?
Are you and your partner bonded together by love?
Are you confident of the love of your mate?
Do you provide the same confidence for your partner?
Is loving each other a pleasure you express to each other in words and ways between you?
Do you find joy in the presence of children, either your own, or those with whom you have made special contact? Do you feel the satisfaction of providing services to children, whether they are your own or others who need loving care?
Do you help and support each other in the rough times without the tears, and troubles pushing you away from each other and into yourselves? Are you able to comfort each other in sadness and cheer for each other in success?
Are you struggling now with some kind of temptation in "the world" that is hindering your relationship with Christ and your mate?
Do you believe you have become stronger in your faith since you are married?
Do you feel your spouse encourages and supports the practice of your faith in daily living?
Do you pray together on a regular basis?
Have you made it a point in your life to keep a close relationship with God in your daily walk?
After your relationship with God, is your marriage your next priority or do "others" come first?
Do you see your marriage grounded in Christ?

This inventory has become a great tool in our marriage. Marriage takes work friends....there is no magic!! We need to keep in touch with each other for this love to grow into the oneness that the covenant of marriage brings us in Christ! There are many opinions out there as to what is wrong with the American culture and our marriages! The bottom line is a lack of indivdual commitment in pursuing and living in a Godly relationship with the Savior. When our Christian life gets brushed aside for whatever reason the marriage begins to suffer. Left unattended.....well the results are what we all know!

Try this inventory with your mate if he or she is willing! Although the inventory is meant to be completed as a couple, if that is not an option for you, taking the inventory yourself should give you some insight as to your role in the relationship. You may find out some very interesting information either way and hopefully it will lead you both to discovering a new relationship or deepening your relationship into what God wants for you and your marriage!

Love your spouse
and ask God to make love blossom
into a tree that shades your life together
with goodness and contentment.
Do not count the cost of love,
look only to the end result of your togetherness.
from Forever in Love Divider Line

For the eyes of the Lord
are on the righteous,
And His ears are open
to their prayers;
1 Peter 3:12

Blossom!
and...
Grow with God,...
together!

May God bless each of you!

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