Reunion Stories!!!
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Kerri's Story
My Search and Reunion
I began to search for my birth parents when I turned 18. As a kid all I could think of was turning 18 so I could find my "real" mom and dad. I spent a lot of my childhood wondering and daydreaming about what they were like. I'd often dream that they would come and save me when I was in trouble and make everything alright again. My adopted parents were very good to me, they gave me everything I need and more...but that couldn't replace the piece of me that was missing. It was like having a puzzle but 2 of the pieces are missing. What good does that do? You can't see the whole picture. That's why I knew I had to find my birth parents.
I began searching on my own and got nowhere. The only clue I had was a name on a photo of me, that my foster parents had found. The name read "Teresa Marie Smead." I didn't get to far with that. I did though, call the Newspaper in Elkhart, IN where I was born and asked a librarian to look up birth announcements hoping I was in there. There was a listing for a baby girl born on that day to a "Mr and Mrs Allen Smead." I looked up the name in a Indiana phone book and there were a ton of Smeads. I made a few calls and didn't really know how to go about it. Soon, I fell into a deep depression. And because of that my search was put on hold. It's been 3 1/2 years since I began my search.
Last year I began searching the Internet for signs of my birth parents. I couldn't find anything, but I put my name on every registry I could find. I began to frequent the "Backyard," an adoption chat room on AOL and met many other adoptees besides myself. We traded tips and looked things up for one another but still, nothing came up. Finally I found a web page called the "Volunteer Search Network." They have a list of people willing to do free searches and leg work in different cities. I emailed a woman that was listed under the city where I was born and by God's grace she email me back. Better yet, we were both on AOL so we could chat in person. Jenny (that was her name) started making calls to all the Smeads in the area and finally found a woman who would be my second cousin. This woman asked her grandfather about me and he thought that his nephew, Allan Smead, (which matches the birth announcement I found earlier)who lived in Michigan was my father. He did not have a number or address for him, but he did have an address for Allan's sister, Roxanne. My Aunt Roxanne's number was unlisted and Jenny and I really wanted to try and contact her by phone. At this point I was ready to give up. I ending up writing Roxanne a letter hoping she's write back and tell me if Allen was my father. That night after I'd sent the letter I got a call around 7 pm and it was Jenny all the way from Indiana. She was so excitied, so I knew it had to be good news. Another cousin of mine had come up with Roxanne's number and Jenny said she would call her. When she called back she was estatic! She told me that Roxanne had told her that she had helped Allen try to get custody of me before I was adopted and that everyone would be so happy to have me in their lives. I found out I have 2 younger brothers: one 19 (just 2 years younger than me!) and the other just 8 years old. I never had siblings growing up so you can imagine how happy I am!!! The older brother, John, called me that night too as well as my father. I feel almost complete now. My father told me about my mother and gave me a picture of her. He has more but he has to find them. Her name is Karol Kress, though she may have been married since then.
If anyone ever needs advice on searching, or if you know anything about my birth mother, my email is:PrincyssT@hotmail.com
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Kerri's Story
After searching 20 long years, spending over eight thousand dollars and being denied access to my file twelve times by the courts in Marcopa County.....I finallt got desperate enough to call the newspaper. I had been in the adoption forum before 9/20/96, it wasn't the Backyard then. (On AOL)Someone mentioned Switchboard and I tried it using many different formulas with my birth name popped up on a person who lived on the east coast. I waited up for seven hours all through the night deciding on the dialouge once I could get someone on the other end....it happened, before I knew it I was talking with my birth father. I fell in love with everything about him. He told me how things had happened and I felt ten times more alive just knowing who I was and the closure began and I started to get in touch with my roots. He helped me put together some information about my birth mother. I was getting nowhere. After I found my birth father the newspaper did their visit and decided since my birthday was only a week away they would run a story: "Are You My Mother?" with certain facts I had uncovered. It was three days before my 36th birthday and something clicked in my head late in the afternoon. I dialed a few numbers and before I knew it I was talking with my birth mother's Godfather! Early the next morning, I mean early, I got a phone call and it was a woman hysterical. At first I thought this was a sick joke but when I woke up I realized this was my birthmother. I began sharing notes that my birthfather helped me put together and things that only the two of them would know. To make a long story short....the story "Are you my mother" never ran. Instead, "Birth mother and Daughter reunite after 36 years on daughter's birthday". She took the first flight out and the first face to face meeting was the morning of my birthday. That was 18 months ago. I feel complete and it is great to look like someone. My kids love their grandmother and all I can say to anyone searching is make sure you are ready for what what you dream for..you might just get it.... and go into this with an open mind and go into this with NO expectations...I lost my adopted family while they processed the reunion....I lost my spouse because he no longer felt the mystery, the most important inner depth to my soul...I took a risk, but I know it is their loss....my life is getting better and I am much happier and feel great about who I am. How can you know where you are going if you don't know where you came from?
KTolles699@aol.com