The first customer that came was Kikuo, he had a serious expression on his face, a look of worry; when he came into the box, he immediately asked for Hitomi to accompany him.
After Hitomi had sat down, she still said said with the same way she used to speak to customers,
'Welcome! Are you only ordering beer? Do you want to open a bottle?'
'I don't have much money, so ... ...' It was already sometime since Kikuo had seen Hitomi's sexy look at work, so for a moment he seemed to be at a loss, saying,
'This is not a place where poor people come!'
'... ... But it's also not a place where rich people come to work!'
'... ...'
'I've heard!' Kikuo slowly regained his composure. 'You have a brother who earns five hundred thousand yen, why do you still work so hard? Why did you leave your home?'
'The reason you came here, is to come here and teach me what is right and wrong?' Hitomi asked with a look of unhappiness. She was still overwhelmed by Kenji's matter of asking for her hand in marriage, and now not expecting that Kikuo would appear at this moment, it really was a bad time.
'No, I don't mean that, I ... ...'
Just at that moment, Kikuo suddenly spoke in stumbling tones, becoming speechless. Hitomi glared at him with a cold look. Kikuo, in his confused state, only had one thought that flashed in his thoughts, that was that he had no way out.
Still, when he felt helpless; at the next moment, this feeling was soon transferred to Hitomi.
Masashi had come, and the person at the back of him was Mr Takagi, behind his grim look, there were slight amounts of surprise that were hidden.
'... ... Father ... ...'
Even Kikuo could see, from Hitomi's weakness and Masashi's seriousness, how critical the situation was.
After all, Masashi and Mr Takagi had just come as customers, so could only sit down silently at the same table with Kikuo. Hitomi also sat by the side peacefully, mixing the water with the whisky. In the end, the one who broke the silence, was Kikuo who couldn't stand fixed situations.
'Er!' Just at that time when he made that strange sound, he also got up, he bowed down to Mr Takagi to show his respect.
'My name is Matsui Kikuo, me and my sister have often come under the care of Mr Masashi.'
'Your sister?' Mr Takagi showed a surprised expression, turning towards Masashi.
How can he say that at this unsuitable moment ... ... Masashi gave a frown, saying in a tone of regret, 'He's talking about Yukiko.'
Mr Takagi showed a face of unhappiness, as if he wanted to open his mouth to say something, but he was interrupted by Kikuo, he continued saying,
'And, with your daughter Hitomi, I am ... ... Oh, What should I say ... ...'
'Are friends!' Hitomi said in a cold tone.
'... ... Yes, we are friends, and now we are even ... ...'
With the personality of one who wouldn't know what to do at the important moment, Kikuo slipped down into his seat again. Right from the start, Mr Takagi had not considered such a person in his view.
'You left home just because of this kind of thing?' he spoke to Hitomi in a low tone. 'Do you feel that, by working in such a place, you can see the real world?'
'What's wrong with this place? If you look down on it, why did you come?'
'The guy you are staying with, what business is he doing actually?'
'I did this job out of my choice, it has no business with him!'
'He is just playing around with you!'
'I want to get married with him!'
Hitomi couldn't help saying those words; not even her, even after Mr Takagi, Masashi and Kikuo heard what she said, they were all speechless.
The one who broke the silence; again it was Kikuo.
'Ah, why don't we all drink some beer? After we become drunk, we will all feel better! That's the beauty of it! Let's open the cap! Let's have the cheapest beer, no no, it's better that it's the most expensive!'
But still, nobody paid any attention to him.
'There's already nothing more to be said! I will leave first!'
Mr Takagi's expression looked even worse than the time he had just arrived, he got up to leave. Now the situation seemed to have become worse, by two steps maybe. Masashi was sighing and asking Hitomi, 'Are you really serious?'
Hitomi only said a sentence of 'Sorry, please go back!', then she moved to the rear of the bar. One was Mr Takagi, who was walking towards the exit of the bar, the other one was Hitomi, who was walking in the opposite direction. Both of them transmitted their anger of rejecting one another, Masashi and Kikuo could only look at each other.
Both of them left with the feeling of helplessness, walking tofether on the busy streets.
'At the year of Hitomi's graduation from university, my mother had just left the world.' Masashi started to tell what happened to Hitomi, little by little.
'My father was busy with work at that moment, and I was studying overseas; it was only her alone that looked after my mother. After what happened, she did not like to have much conversation with me and my father, and she also did not smile often at home.'
'... ...'
'I noticed it, but, I didn't do anything for her ... ... But I just let her be like that, for this point I also have responsibilty.'
'Hey! I saw the guy that was staying with Hitomi, he dosen't give people a comfortable feeling, I think whoever sees him, they would surely get worried.'
The aim of Kikuo's message, originally had been to have Masashi at the same stand as he was, but rather, it made him more worried. When Kikuo discovered that point, it was already too late. Masashi didn't say anything, Kikuo looked at Masashi's profile in a terrifed way, only able to see shadows of extremely worried marks, very clearly shown on his upright features.
'Well ... ... I am not very sure of the real situation, I shouldn't have said so much, I'm really sorry.' Kikuo hurriedly looked for a place where he could excuse himself. 'So please help me send my regards to your father ... ...'
'Can you don't be like this?'
'Hmm?'
'Can you don't be so polite at one point, and even bowing to show me your respect at the other?'
Masashi finally started to show a faint smile; even though it was kind of forced, but at least it didn't look like he was angry with what Kikuo had just said.
'So I say goodbye now, please send my regards to Yukiko.'
Kikuo suddenly waved at Masashi in a relaxed manner, shouting at Masashi who was leaving, 'Hey!' Kikuo's personality, not only could it recover quickly, but he could also easily accept another person's well wishes, fully.
I didn't know that he is not such a bad person after all! Kikuo felt better. That guy was not only handsome, but also had a good personality, what! In that case, you could find no fault with him? He felt a little troubled. He always had this bad habit from young, at any moment when something happened, he would forget about everything that had happened earlier, totally.
Still, even though Kikuo had that fault, he was not able to forget all the worries he had. After one night, his worries increased rather than the other way, making his feel more tense.
He continued to be restless, until evening next day, it happened to be the rest day of the bar, so he asked Hitomi to the nearby cafe.
But, Hitomi didn't come alone, Kenji insisted on coming along. 'My mother's belly button is not protruding, you know!' Once Kenji saw Kikuo, there were the first words he said. Then, he sat down in a natural; matter of course way, at the table he and Hitomi sat down at. Even though Hitomi told him in a harsh manner, 'Maybe you better go back first! Tonight Kikuo and I have something to talk about.' Still, Kenji just replied in a cheeky way, 'This fellow seems quite humorous, I also want to have a drink with him!'
Since he had already said that, if he insisted on chasing him away, he would have been wrongly thought of as a narrow minded man. Kikuo, who was just the type of man who liked to seek attention at the unimportant parts.
'Oh, never mind! It's all right with me, it dosen't matter! The three of us are just like the three Musketeers, isn't that interesting? Ha Ha Ha! Oh! Please take a seat! What would you like to drink? Beer or other beverages?'
'The more he played around, the more empty he felt. In front of the cheeky Kenji, he just could not discuss any serious topic. In the end, from the beginning to the end, he just acted as the clown who helped to cheer up the atmosphere among the two.
Still, taking advantage of the drunk situation, he had kind of passed his message.
If there is one day when you hate Kenji, you can always come and look for me, I will always be waiting for you --.
Hitomi was also drunk, so you could not really know how much she heard.. But, at least, he had been able to say what he had in mind, the only other things that he could do, was only waiting.
The next morning, Kikuo was partly feeling the pain of a headache with nauseous feelings, and partly still continually telling himself.
I can only wait, only wait, only wait ... ... .
On the other hand, Yukiko could only repeatedly repeat in her heart, 'I can only believe him now!'
After she had left her workplace, Yukiko was called to a cafe by Shinji.
After she had just sat down, Shinji passed her a small box from a jewellery shop, without saying anything.
'This necklace is for you, because you always wear those cheap stuff.'
Yukiko gave him a surprised look, Shinji seemed to have waited very long for this moment, he contined, saying,
'If I just give you the maintenance fees, you would probably reject them, right? So Masashi asked me to buy something to replace it. Or do you feel money would be better?'
'... ... You're lying, Mr Takagi won't ... ...'
'He is trying to forget another woman, so he is in contact with you.' Shinji said, without giving Yukiko any oppoturnity; suddenly the smile of scorn appeared on his face again. 'But, that woman has already got married.'
Suddenly, that vision of that night of her birthday passed by in her mind, that paper she had seen at Masashi's home. At the same time, Masashi had also mentioned to her before, of him going to attend his ex-girlfriend's wedding party.
'Oh, I guess for such a girl like you, you won't be understand what men are thinking!'
'... ... Are you are referring to Ms Misaki ... ...'
Shinji raised his head with a surprised look.
'What! So he has mentioned it to you before! Then I won't beat around the bush, so I will just say things stright out! Tonight, right now, the two should be meeting each other.'
'... ...'
'You will never be able to replace the place Ms Misaki has in Masashi's heart! Don't see that he seems quite kind by his looks, actually he is that kind of a man. Now you hate him, right? I advise you to just be good and accept that necklace!'
Shinji used an impatient, mixed with a tone of detest, voice to say it, taking the bill in his hand, standing up to leave.
Yukiko followed hurriedly with a pale look.
Once it was dawn, the sky would turn to a rather strange color. When they were talking inside the cafe, it had already started to rain outside. That was considered an autumm end, cold type of rain.
'Please wait! I believe in Mr Takagi's personality!'
Shinji turned back, he showed a very irritated look. Yukiko held out her hand, as if she wanted to give back that box, which held the necklace, back to him.
'I can't accept this! Because I can never hate him!'
'Don't be troublesome!'
'I don't believe what you said!'
Yukiko's words, which almost became like a shout, made Shinji lose his calmness at the moment.
He used his strength to grab Yukiko's wrist, to pull her closer to him, wanting to kiss her by force.
'What are you trying to do?'
'You don't pretend to be so innocent!'
'Let me go!'
'Anyway, isn't it the same with anybody?'
'Stop!'
Shinji's hand touched the collar of Yukiko's shirt, she used all her strength to move her body, trying to fling his hands away; in the end, not only her shirt had a tear, her bag also flew to the roadside.
The cars that passed let out beeping sounds, Yukiko took the chance of the time that Shinji was a bit alarmed, and flung off his hand, picking up her bag, immediately crossing the road. She ran rather wildly, without looking back, letting the rain just fall anywhere on her, there were even some times when she fell down, but she still frantically, wishing that she could leave that place, the further the better.
Out of the apartment's windows, there was the light could be seen, that was shining out of the house; Yukiko could not let Kikuo see her looking this way, with her clothes torn, and herself totally wet, that awkward look. Luckily the rain was now getting smaller, so she walked, in a crippling way, towards the garden. On the way, when Yukiko walked towards the spot where Masashi had held the red umbrella and waited for her, she could not help having that warm feeling in her eyes. As she moved forward, to the spot where Kikuo had knelt down before Masashi, Masashi had said, 'I will really treasure your sister.', that spot, she felt her eyelids getting heaver.
She tried very hard to stop the tears and walked towards the garden, from the phone booth she made a call to Masashi's residence. The result was the voice of the voice recorder, to ask her to leave her name, telephone, but, Yukiko just put down the phone without saying anything. Just as she wanted to keep her phone card into her wallet, that photo suddenly came to the view of her eyes, that was the photo they had taken when they went to the horse race club.
Yukiko was smiling, and beside her, Masashi was also smiling.
The smiles of the two, gradually become blur from her tears. When the first tear came down from her eyes down her face, she could not control it anymore.
Just as what Shinji had said, Masashi was certainly with Misaki at that moment. The two of them maintained an awkward silence , walking on the streets at night.
Why do I have to meet her? Masashi's rather stiff look showed signs of regret. Why did she make a call to me? Why did she say [Really want to see you], those words? Why must she say [Once again] ... ... And, why couldn't he himself ignore those words ... ...
Misaki, who had started to talk about the past without any misgivings, and as the time to part came nearer, there appeared some faint signs of loneliness on her face.
'... ... Though the two of us are often together, but I don't understand anything about you, and you were always not willing to try to understand me.'
At her mumurs, under her voice, gently tears came down.
Rather, Masashi said in a fierce tone,
'It's you who betrayed me first, you and another guy ... ...'
Misaki cut his words, this time it was very clear that her tears were pouring down.
'Isn't it all because of you? If it was not because of you, I wouldn't ... ... get married ... ...' She seemed be using all her strength, trying to say something;, following that, she lightly shook her head, 'I married someone so that I could forget you!'
The feelings, which she had been trying to control, had come to its limits.
Misaki cried and hugged Masashi; at this moment, Masashi could just push away Misaki, who was crying very strongly in his embrace, and he could also turn his face to another side.
But, Masashi did not do that.
He could not control his feelings that were becoming intense, so he held on to Misaki's shoulders. In his heart he felt a growing sentiment of recollection, even he himself was not sure of the relationship between Misaki and him, really could he just use this feeling of cherishing the past, to put everything to a full stop.
Masashi, who returned with heavy feelings to his residence, discovered that the lights of his voice recorder, that part for leaving your message, kept shimmering on and off.
When Masashi pressed down the [Play] button, at the start there was no voice, but after some minutes had passed, suddenly a loud and clear voice came into hearing distance.
'Konbawa! I am Yukiko!' It was Yukiko's voice. 'I just passed by here, and I thought I might just come over to see if you are at home, but in the end, it was still not possible, what a regret!'
Masashi, who was removing what he was wearing, looked at the telephone in surprise, if from Yukiko's usual lighthearted mood to see, it seemed as if she was overly lively, and her voice also appeared to be a little sharp, what was even more beyond his understanding was, his handphone had not even rung once.
'If there is a time when you don't want me, you must tell me! If you don't need me any more, please tell me clearly and in a direct manner. When that time comes, I will definitely follow what you say. During the time I was waiting for you, I suddenly thought of this matter. That's all. Bye Bye! Good night!'
The voice recording ended, on the cover, there appeared the time of the recording, the date had changed, it was before dawn, twelve hours and thirteen minutes.
In his mind, there appeared for a moment, the vision of the shadow of Yukiko waiting for him late at night; he could only stare blankly at his hands, in his palm there still remained that warm feeling of Misaki's touch, when he thought of the loneliness under Yukiko's not natural tone of speech, inside him the feeling of self hate grew.
But, Misaki still held a place inside a specific corner of his heart. She didn't appear in his memories with the position of a lover, but rather, it was lively; like laughing or crying before him.
After one incident happened, another one followed.
Just one matter of Masashi, which had already made Yukiko's state of mind very disturbed, and also Kikuo, who had just been released from his worry over Hitomi's matter, didn't know that another problem would come over to them, with the impact of a tornado, and it was also over an incident that was out of their expectations.
Their mother in the country had fallen ill.
Their mother, who was not very healthy before; after the guest room had stopped its operations, and also with the effects of being heavily in debt, further, being worried about Yukiko and Masashi being together; so, starting from the day when she took the long distance bus from Tokyo back to their hometown, she started lying sick in bed. At the start, she and her husband had believed that it was all because of exhaustion, still, after a period had passed, she was still late in recovery, so they decided to go to the hospital to do a detailed check up.
'Didn't Yukiko say that she would write home? Why is there still no letter from her, your mother has grown very impatient waiting for it. She is always worried about this and that, lying on her bed, she is always nagging about this and that ... ... She wants to meet Yukiko, she wants to have a good talk with her!'
Mr Matsui called Kikuo to tell him the matter of their mother being hospitalized; his voice was low, using a trival, but not too trival voice, saying that. Kikuo, who had not even come to Tokyo for fully two months, didn't think that his father's voice had become so much older.
'Write a letter to Mother!' Kikuo said to Yukiko. The letter she had written earlier, unexpectedly had led Kikuo to kneel down before Masashi, that little part of unrest, so in the end, it still ended up with nothing definite, she also didn't send out that letter, and now she also didn't feel like writing another letter, with completely the same content. If she really wrote like that, it might make her mother even more worried.
But, up till what had happened now, there was also nothing that could bring relief to her mother. Even though there was a pile of letter paper on the table, but she still found it difficult to start writing, instead, she could only look at it and sigh.
Yukiko bought quite a few books on tennis, horse riding and boat rowing, all at one go. Not only did she try to cook French dishes, she also started to learn English conversation. She even went to the bar to look for Hitomi, to try to seek information about every hobby that Masashi had. Though she understood that using this way was a little childish, and it could even be thought of as silly behavior, but, even if other people thought of her as a stupid woman, she just did not want to leave Masashi. She wanted to reduce the distance between them, even if it was only a little, it was all right. The fact that she had this determination, it should be praised. But this was also the agreement that she had come to after trying to curb many days of unhappiness.
Hitomi looked at Yukiko's expression, though she was a bit hesitant, but she still made a call to Masashi.
'Can you just don't anyhow play with Yukiko's feelings!'
Suddenly there was such a call, and it was also a voice full of anger; Masashi, with a face of confusion, said,
'What is it! I don't know what you are talking about?'
'If you cannot accept the feelings Yukiko has for you, then you better not have anything to do with her ... ...'
Masashi cut into what Hitomi was saying, using a hurried tone, asking,
'Wait a minute, why do you say that?'
Once Masashi said that, Hitomi started to understand everything. Actually, when she was thinking, [Why did this matter happen], that time, she had already fully understood why this happened.
'Yukiko came to look for me!'
'Oh?'
'She said that she wants to become the type of woman that Brother likes.'
'... ...'
'Don't you feel that, in the way she is acting now, she is very pitiful?'
'I feel I can understand what she is feeling.'
'... ... Really?'
'... ... Yes ... ...' After Masashi lightly nodded his head, he turned to ask Hitomi. 'Yes, do you really plan to get married, with the guy that you are living with at the moment?'
This time it was Hitomi's turn to be hesitant. 'So what would matter about that!' Her tone seemed to be weaker.
'If there's anything I can help with, then do tell me! I will help you.'
'Can you don't suddenly become so reasonable! I don't need you to bother with my matters, anyway, I am already someone who has left the home!'
'No matter what can be said, you are still my sister!'
'... ...'
'On Sunday, if you like, you can come to my home! I also plan to ask Yukiko here!' After Masashi had hung up the phone, he showed an uncomfortable expression.
The reason he had changed the topic to Hitomi, in the middle of the conversation, was really for a means of escape.
That was because, before Hitomi's call, his father had just given him a note of warning, hoping that his marriage with Ms Kanzaki would be confirmed soon.
'Is it because that Ms Matsui always can't agree to back out? It seems as if she is rather hard to deal with!'
Mr Takagi looked at Shinji, who was standing beside them, as if his eyes carried some meaning in them, Shinji also returned his gaze with a smile.
'But ... ...' Masashi almost wanted to say something, but was stopped by Mr Takagi first, who said, without any mercy,
'You are not thinking of getting married with her, right!'
He could not say anything to rebut against him; though he did not want to agree with what his father had said, but, what he had said, was not wrong.
'If you want to play the game of love, you must also not go overboard.!'
'... ...'
'Don't tell me you want to ruin Yukiko's whole life?'
This was another point that he could not express any argument against.
It was just at this moment, when Masashi was just at his wits' end, rushing out of the director's office. He needed to see her, but, after they had met, he would need to talk to her. He did not know what to say, what manner he should he should use, to face her.
He stood at the same spot, where he had been holding the red umbrella, waiting for her, wholeheartedly.
Finally Yukiko finally appeared, in her hand, she was holding a bag from the bookshop, as if it was very heavy. Inside, it was full of tennis books, books on horse riding, boat rowing, French dishes ... ... other books, of course it included the female comics she loved.
Sigh, Masashi partly waved to Yukiko, and on the other hand, was also secretly sighing. Her suffering, distressful looks really made him feel very sorry for her, but from deep inside him, there was deep hatred of himself, being unable to respond to her love.
'Oh, it's you!' The way Yukiko said it, she seemed unusually cheerful, exactly like the voice inside the recording machine. 'Autumn is the best season for sports, I was just thinking of starting to play tennis! When we were in high school, our physical teacher said that I have a special talent for sports! So, I would like to practice again and see. If you have interest, then next time let's meet and go together! What am I saying? Ha Ha!'
Even though she was smiling, she just would not look at Masashi's face. Masashi also seemed rather down, looking at her.
After waiting for her laugh to become lighter still, until she had finished laughing, Masashi finally said,
'Hitomi called me, saying that you asked her about many of my hobbies.'
'... ...'
'I feel that, by your forced way of being with me, it'd not very good.'
'There's isn't such a thing ... ...'
When she hadn't finished saying that, Masashi again said in a resolute tone, 'That is not very good!'
Yukiko, feeling sentimental, was being worried to not knowing what to do, right down to the bottom.
But, the intention of Masashi saying that phrase, was not to ruin Yukiko's efforts.
'I have something to give you.'
Must be alimony fees! Once Yukiko thought about that, her feelings became even lower.
'You must have waited for me all night, yesterday! I'm really sorry!'
He is probably angry with me, for coming last night without any invitation.
'I'll give this to you first!'
But, I don't want any maintenance fees ... ...
Yukiko, grieving from within, held up her head; but saw Masashi taking something small and silver in his hand, swinging in front of her eyes.
'The keys of my room.'
'... ... Are you giving them to me?'
'Yes! Like this, even if it is over twelve o'clock, you also don't need to go home!'
On Yukiko's stiff face, there slowly appeared a blush. From the start, when she had discovered Masashi standing there, waiting for her by the roadside, her heart had already cooled down by a half, she always thought that he had come to say [Goodbye]. She also thought that she at least she should thank him, because he was willing to come here by himself, to say those words.
Masashi quietly put the keys into the Yukiko's hand.
But, Yukiko slowly, strongly held them in her hand. She thought, at this time, this particular moment, she, herself was not in the place of Cinderella, as in a fairy tale; but she was definitely, really, living in the life of reality.
Sunday.
After Hitomi had made the preparations for going out, she turned to face Kenji. Kenji, while, was lying on the floor, as if he was trying to get rid of air, with his eyes to the ceiling.
'Hey! You are using my brother's money to set up a store, don't you feel shameless?'
This phrase, she didn't know how many times she had said it, but still, there was no change in Kenji's reply.
