Hot Chick:n/a in this movie, although Monica Bellucci plays Mary Magdalene!

Synopsis -- Are you kidding?

Short declaratory phrase in an attempt to get quoted in TV trailer, ad, or cover box --

"Son of a bitch Romans!"

Nate's review:

Well, so I went to see the big movie. I caught a matinee and the thing was still pretty packed... And for good reason. This is an excellent film, in a cinematic sense. Mel shows his chops once again. The cinematography is awesome and the whole thing has a very authentic look, which was the intention. I had heard a lot about the violence and that is was almost too much to take; I didn't exactly find this to be true. I think that "Braveheart" is actually more violent, but people don't have nearly as much personal affection for William Wallace as they do for Jesus, and hence they don't like to see JHC get mauled in gritty detail, and so it comes off as harder to watch. But for me, it does give a much realer sense of what The Guy went through, and creates such a greater feeling of realism to a story that you have heard all your life, but maybe never really understood before. Let me say also that I am a big sucker for form cuts. They are oldie but goodie transitional devices, and Mel uses them frequently and expertly as transitions to flashbacks that are temporally placed in such a way that one doesn't always come when you think that it might, which I enjoyed because it added an element of unpredictability in a story that you already know. How's that for a long sentence? The androgynous devil lurking about was also cool and unsettling at the same time. Creepy bastard. Speaking of Satan, I must point out that talking excessively during a movie is the devil's work. Some jackass was giving a fucking Bible lesson two rows down from me, and it was driving me crazy. I wanted to crucify him! Ha ha. No, but seriously, drink a warm glass of shut the hell up in the movies, kids. The movie has some somewhat comedic moments, too-- i.e. what the hell was going on with King Herod? Man that guy was not even close to being not gay. I also liked the scene when Barrabas was set free. He was lovin' it, and giving the crowd hell. Nice work. The coolest scene was of the resurrection though. The shot of the air being let out of the wrappings was the sheeot. Go Mel go, and go see this movie. Just don't bring the little kids, and shut the hell up.
Rating: 9.5 out of 10 times I thought of "Monty Python's The Life of Brian" during the movie

Jason's review:

Jason has yet to review this film.

Ryan's review:

Ryan has yet to review this film.

Tim's review:

Tim has yet to review this film. Whatever!

Back to Reviews