Red Planet, 2000



The year is 2050 and poor old polluted planet Earth is going through it's final death throes. All eyes turn to Mars as an alternate home. A remote terraforming project had been launched there a couple of decades earlier and had been working fine until recently.

A crew is sent to Mars to find out why the project failed. The main ship is whacked by a huge solar flare just as they enter orbit knocking out most of the onboard systems.

Five of the crew head down to the surface leaving the female commander to try and straighten out the mess. However, the landing party crashes big time destroying the landing vessel and their funky navigational robot, or so they think. Not only that but the the base station that had been placed there earlier has also been wiped out. But by who or what?

Just as their suits are running out of oxygen they discover, to no one's surprise, that Mars has an atmosphere. Like, everybody already knew there would be air otherwise the movie would be over.

As if they don't have enough problems the rejuvinated cat-like robot shows up and is in one hell of a bad mood. It starts killing off the crew at every chance.

We finally find out how the planet got it's atmosphere, it was bugs, millions and millions of hungry bugs that eat anything including one of the crew members. I guess these bugs fart out oxygen after they eat.

One by one the crew gets bumped off until just one remains. He jumps into an antique Russian space probe and blasts off to rendezvous with the main ship. Only one problem though, he's dead when he arrives onboard but is revived by his female commander. I guess being dead makes you pretty horny because the two immediately start sucking on each other's face. Maybe I'm old fashioned but I think I'd probably like to take a few breaths after waking up dead before I start necking.

The whole picture is pretty predictable but at least I didn't fall asleep in the middle. It's worth a rental.



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