EPILOGUE

A Few Days Later…

Zac sat a small table in the canteen of the hospital, his hands around a cup of hot chocolate. He looked around the empty cafeteria, the only other person was a girl clearing the counter, it was late, almost closing time. Zac felt exhausted, the effects of his ValerginP40 had kicked in ten minutes ago, and he felt sleepy. If it weren’t for reasonably loud rock music playing from the radio on top of the microwave behind the counter, Zac felt he would have fallen asleep by now. A song called ‘Clementine’ was all that was keeping him awake.

Zac reflected on things as he sipped his hot chocolate. It had been quite a few couple of days, just trying to get back to normal. His mother was in hospital giving birth, Zac was waiting for a new brother or sister anxiously, yet he couldn’t stand to be around his family. The way his father had been looking at him made him feel uneasy, it was a look of pity, and one of disgrace that he couldn’t have known it was going on, that he hadn’t been the one to hurt Don for what he’d done. His brothers were trying to be there, Zac had never been more thankful to have Isaac and Taylor as big brothers. As always they were supportive.

He looked back upon the last few days and shuddered. That Friday had been one of the worst nights of his life.

"Zac?" Isaac had come over, and placed a tray down. "Are you okay?" he asked as he sat opposite Zac.

Zac didn’t look up, he just gave an unsure nod.

"Want some of this?" Isaac motioned with his fork to a salad.

"No thanks," Zac shook his head.

Isaac took a snickers bar off of his tray and he put it in front of Zac. "Well, Here…"

"No thanks," Zac shoved the chocolate bar away.

"You have to eat, Zac," Isaac sighed.

"I’ll eat it later," Zac looked over at Isaac, frowning a little.

"Okay, okay," Isaac put his hands up in surrender, and began eating his salad.

Zac finished his hot chocolate in one go, then put the cup down, still holding onto it.

Isaac watched Zac’s expression, it was filled with hurt and pain, Zac had bruises on one side of his face, they were fading now. "Zac, are you sure you’re okay?" Isaac asked in a much softer voice.

Zac looked away from his oldest brother, his lip quivering, his hands tightened around the empty plastic cup, and the cup crushed under his hands. "Want the truth?" Zac asked, his voice so small and slight, almost a whisper.

"Of course I do," Isaac answered. "Zac…I want to know everything…"

Zac was shaking, his lip still quivering as he talked. "I feel disgusted, Ike," Zac forced out in a whimper

"With what?"

"With myself, with Don…and the fucking judge who only sentenced him to five years for what he did to me!" Zac slammed his fists clutched around the cup down on the table, it made a loud thud and a clatter of the fork as it fell from Isaac’s plate of salad. Zac’s eyes were filling up, his face paling. He could not believe Don was in prison for only five years for what he'd done. At least he was being held in the UK – but even another planet wouldn’t be far away enough.

"I agree he deserved life," Isaac admitted, he lowered his eyes. "Zac…y’know what hurts me? That you didn’t come to me and tell me what he’d done…I thought we could talk about anything…"

A tear dribbled down Zac’s cheek. "I told you he said he'd hurt me if I did…"

"That shouldn’t have stopped you, you know I would have protected you…" Isaac looked Zac straight in the eyes. "I’m your brother, and I’m always gonna be here for you, you know that."
Zac’s hands were shaking. "I just want to stop feeling so disgusting…" he let out in a half-sob, he pressed his shaking hands to his eyes. "I feel so dirty, Ike…and I shower and scrub and shower and scrub and I can still feel his fingerprints on me, Ike, I can still feel it!" he cried hysterically.

"It’ll get better," Isaac was about to reach over to touch Zac’s arm to comfort him, but stopped, thinking the better of it. "All scars heal, physically and emotionally," Isaac promised.

Zac took his hands away from his teary eyes. "And what if it doesn’t?"

"It will, Zac. Me and Tay and Dad are here for you all the way," Isaac stated firmly, he took a few more bites of his salad – it was the first thing he’d eaten in days, his worry for Zac’s health had been forcing him to stop eating just so he could pay all of his attention to his brother. "And like I said, things will get better – you’ll forget in time, the moment things go back to normal for you, the better you’ll feel," he explained. "Just think of high times, Zac. Don’t force yourself to go back on it, because I know that’s what you’ve been doing."
"How can I forget it…after all I went through…"

"Zac…people go through it everyday, and some of them get hurt a lot worse, somehow they get through, and if they can do it, I know you can," Isaac picked up a piece of lettuce and lodged it in between his teeth and his top lip and then grabbed two pieces of cucumber and slapped them over his eyes. He made a disgusting snorting monster noise and Zac looked up and suddenly began giggling.

Isaac took the pieces of cucumber off of his eyes. He used his tongue to drag the piece of lettuce into his mouth and began chewing on it. He looked at Zac. "You’ll get through this…you ARE a Hanson after all…" he smiled.

Zac nodded. "Yeah, I suppose," he said distantly.

"Now…are you ready to see our new baby sister?"

Zac gasped. "We have a new sister?" he asked, a twinkle entering his once dull brown eyes.

"Yeah…" Isaac got up and motioned for Zac to get up to. "C’mon."

Zac got up and paused, just as he heard the song on the radio come to a chorus. The song had changed to the song he’d listened to the other night when he’d been in the shower.

Then the nightmares come

And you get blown away

And up in your room the walls are cold

You’ll find your head is holding out

For the welcome of a better day

And Zac forgot his troubles for the rest of the night, and let them slide into the back of his mind, knowing that one day, he’d remember, but right now, his head was holding out for the welcome of a better day.

THE END…?