Trent is snooping around Jennifer's house.
Laura: (screams) Oh, no, someone's spying on us. Oh, it's you Trent. It's so nice of you to spy on us because you are such a good, honest man.
Trent: Where is your beautiful, blonde, stalkable daughter that I barely know and have no reason to find?
Laura: Thanks for being concerned, but she isn't here. Maybe you could kidnap my grand daughter or something. Goodbye, and you're welcome to break into our house if you'd like.
TC: (arriving) Travis, Jack wouldn't let me rape the new prison gaurd. What's it to him who I get?
Travis: I think I know.
TC: Really?
Travis: Of course not. If us vilains were that quick, the good guys would never win.

MEANWHILE, Jennifer is in bed with Jack in his cell.
Jack: I love you, Jen.
Jen: So many people do. You, Peter, Jack-
Jack: I AM Jack.
Jen: Wait a second. You look a lot different than you did two months ago.
Jack: Prison changed me. Or maybe I'm a Jack impersonator hired by someone who kidnaopped Jack years ago and made you think he left you but I've been brainwashed into thinking I am Jack and-
Jen: This sounds familiar.
Jack: I can't imagine why. Anyway, you have to leave soon.
Jen: So let's enjoy every second. You never know how long it'll be before you get recast again.
guard: Williams' car is still there.
Jen: Don't worry, I'm sure I can get out.
Jack: Prisons always have unlocked back doors.
Jen: So that's how Stefano escapes- What's wrong?!?!
Jack: It's a ruse. Who taught you to be an investigative reporter, anyway? (pause) Oh.

MEANWHILE, Marlena is with a dying Roman.
Roman: I want you to go, Doc.
Marlena: What do you mean? "Go" is such a big word.
Roman: (to himself) She's been hanging around John more than I thought. (aloud) Get out.
Marlena: (to Caroline) He kicked me out.
Caroline: Only because he loves you. He loves his family so much he left Salem and never checked on his kids for years.
Marlena: (again to Roman) I'll do everything I can for you.
Roman: What can you do?
Marlena: Put on makeup . . . ignore my job . . . ignore my kids . . . look pretty . . . cry . . . gasp . . . have flashbacks . . .
Roman: Maybe I will get better if you do all that. (goes to sleep)
Laura: (entering) What's going on?
Marlena: He can't die. Then only one man would be in love with me, and I wouldn't be able to deal with that.

MEANWHILE, Stefano and Kristen are saving John and Hope.
Kristen: Hope! You're so slow. Now we can't save John and I'll never be with him.
Hope: You're just realizing this now?
Stefano: Girls, stop bickering and let's have a sing-along for the rest of the helicopter ride. (singing) John, John, John's in the jungle
             dumb as he can be!
             Ahhhhhhhhhh!
             Watch out for that tree!
             He can climb up a rope
             or jump off a slope
             with the help of his friend
             a dope named Hope.
             Then away he'll get
             in the blackbird, his jet
             while natives are chasing him with a net!

Kristen: Oh, shut up!

End of Show.