(Jack and Jennifer are in his prison cell)
NuJack: I feel so strange today, not like myself at all.
Jennifer: Yeah, you look a little strange. (she shrugs it off). I have us all hooked up to the warden's computer. Hopefully we can find out what happened to your old cell-mate, Travis.
Jack: For some strange reason I just need to know where he went.
Jennifer: I can't imagine why, he's probably far far away by now.
Jack: I am sure he is. People who leave around here, never come back, unless they die first.
Jennifer: I don't have to go home for awhile because I dumped Abby off on my grandma again so, do you want to have sex? I wouldn't let you touch me before you were arrested but now that you are behind bars I am turned on.
Jack: Ok, that sounds like a plan. Luckily, unlike most prisoners in the United States I don't have a cell-mate. So we can have sex unnoticed. I am sure none of the guards or the neighbouring prisoners will hear us.
Jennifer: Your so thoughtful and smart, not like me. That's why I love you.
Jack: Oh, Jen.
(They kiss)
(In Rome, Sami is hiding under Carrie and Austin's bed yet again. This time she is eating pop-corn.)
Sami: I am almost
starting to like this. My fabulous soon-to-be husband sure is kinky.
I wonder what they would say if
I asked to join them.....
Carrie: Oh Austin, I love you so much.
Austin: I love you too.
Sami: I think I am gonna wretch
(Roman, Marlena and Eric are in Roman's hospital room)
Roman: Eric would you run to the house and get me some nice comfy sweats?
Eric: Of course dad, especially sice this could be (he chokes up violently) your LAST WISH. Waaaaaaah! (He runs from the room)
Marlena: Are you uncomfortable?
Roman: No, I just wanted to get rid of him so we could have sex.
Marlena: ROMAN!
Roman: Uhhh, Oops. Was that out loud? I mean so I could tell you how much I love you, and hope that we can get back together.
Marlena: Oh, ok.
Roman: So why don't you sit over here with me?
Marlena: Sure.
(She sits down innocently on the bed beside him)
(In the jungle John is still lying around. First he dreams of the time he and Marlena got married, then had sex, then he dreams of the time he found her in a lake and they almost had sex and so on. He wakes up and finds himself hugging a tree stump.)
John: Man, I must have a really bad hangover. Oh! I am in the jungle. I fell off that cliff last night. HEY! Some native in a skirt must have pranced down here and stolen my watch! That really ticks me off. I have the flower, so I'll bring it back to the compound now, but I AM GOING TO GET WHOEVER TOOK MY WATCH! It had the nice big numbers on it so even I could read it. Damn natives.
(He takes off for the compound)
(Stefano is fighting with Kristen
and Hope as usual)
Hope: We are not leaving without John.
Kristen: We are not leaving without John.
Stefano: I KNOW DAMMIT.
Stefano: Why would I want to leave without John? He is my BEST BUDDY! He just happens to be sleeping with the woman I ADORE! Have a look around this freaky shrine for god's sake! Now why would I want him dead!?!
Hope: I don't know yet, could you repeat that for me?
Kristen: I think I get it......hmmmm.......Let's see......If John dies then he can't......sleep with Marlena anymore?
Stefano: Exactly.
Hope: And that benefits you how?
Stefano: AAAAAAAH. I guess I needn't worry about you uncovering the Maison Blanche secrets on your own.