"But I Thought....?"

Joey Potter sat on her bed in her room, drawing tiny hearts in her diary witht he name Dawson inside them. She sighed, for what was about the millionth time that day. The last three pages of the secret book had "I Luv Dawson" (or something to that effect) written on them. Drawing a final heart and sighing once again, she closed the book and capped the pen.
"Why am I doing this to mysel?" she asked aloud. Flopping down on the bed, she lay in a state of complete, utter, and total despair and confusion. Just then, her sister Bessie called from downstairs.
"Joey! Your little friend has come to play!"
Oh great, Joey thought, The guy I love has come to complain and moan about his lost love, Miss I'm - so - perfect - look - at - me - and - love - me! Well, better just get this over with.
She padded down the stairs. To her surprise, it was Pacey who was in the living room, and not Dawson.
"Hey, Joey," Pacey greeted her. Joey made a face.
"Bessie, I thought I told you not to let creatures from other planets into the house! They could be a danger to Alexander!" Joey whined. Bessie gave her "the look" and took her baby into the kitchen.
"Save it Joey," Pacey said, and beckoned her closer to him, until she was sitting next to him on the couch.
"Look, I'm REALLY not in the mood today for you're-" She didn't get to finish.
"Hmm... Let's play Wheel of Fortune. I have three letters for you to complete the puzzle: P, M, and S," Pacey joked, and smirked.
"Don't even TRY with me, you slimeball. And you are SO wrong. But what do you want, so I can make this quick and get you out of here before you contaminate the house?" Joey said in one breath.
"Well," Pacey said with mock sadness, "If you're going to be THAT way about it..." Then he saw the look on Joey's face. And he got a little nervous.
Just get it over with, man, he told himself, She'll say yes, she'll say yes!
"I wanted to know if you'd like to go to the docks tonight and have dinner with me," he mumbled.
Will Joey say yes? What is this going on with Pacey? How will Dawson react? And where does Jen fit into all of this?
Joey stared at him in shock, amazement, and yes, a little shyness. Pacey was asking her out!
But wait! she thought Just a minute ago I was drawing hearts all over my diary in tribute to Dawson... But it's not like he'll ever notice me, so what the hell?
"Joey?" Pacey urged in excitement and fear. Joey looked up at him, smiled slowly, and said,
"Yeah, sure. Why not?"
Pacey jumped up, his mind screaming, OH YES! OH YES! OH YES!
But he said, "Great! I'll pick you up here at seven, okay?"
"Fine," Joey answered, "But one question... What in the world posessed you to do this?"
Pacey smiled a knowing smile, and went over to the door to let himself out.
"Maybe the fact that I was around this beautiful woman all my life, and despite contrary ideas, I was too scared to do anything about it," he said and left.
Joey stared at the door which closed with a thud, and grinned widely. Strange how your feelings for a person can change in a matter of minutes. Just then Bessie walked in holding Alexander.
"So... what are you going to wear?" she asked, smiling. Joey stared down at what she had on.
"What's wrong with this?"
Bessie clucked her tongue and shook her head.
"No, no, no, Joey. Pacey asked you to go to dinner at the docks. So you've got to look nice," she said.
"Well, what do you have in mind?" Joey inquired with a snotty attitude. Bessie looked thoughtful for a moment, then began a trek up the stairs.
"Come with me," she beckoned and Joey followed. Once in Bessie and Bodie's room, Bessie set Alexander down in his crib and began to go through her closet. Joey stood impatiently behind her and watched as her sister pulled out a pair of black pants and a tight white tank top. She set those on the bed and began rummaging through the closet again. A minute later she found what she was looking for: a black jean long-sleeved shirt.
"Go put this on and see what you think," she commanded. Joey took the clothes, sighed, and went to the bathroom to change.
Joey stared into the full-length mirror on the back of Bessie's door. She actually did look quite good.
"I like it," she said with a small smile as Bessie looked over her shoulder.
"You look great. What time is it?"
Joey took a glance at her watch.
"5:02, so I have about two hours," she answered. Bessie turned her around.
"That's all??? We have to hurry! Change out of those and shower, fast!" She slapped Joey lightly on her butt and Joey jumped to obey her older sister.
Meanwhile, Pacey was at home asking his sister Maggie what to cook.
"Pacey, you've gotta be romantic. Girls like that. So make something like... fruit salad and bring Italian bread. I'll run and get some in a minute," Maggie answered.
"All right, I'll take your word for it. But that means you've gotta buy fruit too. So what else?" Pacey said, writing everything down as they sat discussing the date at the Witter family's kitchen table.
Maggie thought for a minute.
"Bring Kool-Aid in an empty wine bottle, and bring two of Mom's wine glasses. Just don't break them," she added, "And of course, you'll want to bring that box of chocolates hidden under your bed, and napkins and plates and stuff like that. You'll need a bag of ice.. Hmm, this is going to cost me... But anyway, to make it really special, stuff all of it into a wicker picnic basket with a big quilt. So it really looks sweet. She'll think the world of you just for that!"
Pacey finished writing Maggie's words down and looked over the list.
"Okay, I'll give you the money for the stuff, but what am I supposed to say to her? How do I act?" he asked nervously.
"Just don't come on too strong," his sister advised, "And don't start mouthing off. Just... be a gentleman. And remember: No means no."
Pacey smiled at the last comment. He could do that. No problem.
"Thanks Naggie Maggie, I owe you one," he said and patted his sister on the shoulder. He began up the stairs to look for a picnic basket and a quilt.
"Pacey?" Maggie called after him. He turned and looked at her.
"What?"
"Tell me everything when you get home," she said, grabbed her purse, and left the house. Pacey just smiled after her.
"Hi, is Jen available?" Dawson Leery asked into the phone. His palms were sweating and he wiped them on his bed cover.
"I'm sorry, she's out with someone right now. Can I please take a message?" Mrs. Lindley, Jen's grandmother, answered.
Dawson sighed.
"Just tell her her ex called, and he wants to... talk... to her," he said and hung up without saying goodbye.
There was a knock at his door.
"Nobody in here but the world's most UN-wanted," he called out, flopping down on the bed. The door opened and to his surpirse, Jen walked in.
"You're not unwanted, Dawson. I know for certain," she said and smiled weakly.
"I just called you, Jen, what's up?" Dawson asked, sitting up and motioning for her to sit down on the bed with him.
"Um, I wanted to talk to you about our... argument at the docks a couple weeks ago," she answered and continued, just looking down at her hands, "I... I think that I made a mistake, Dawson. A big one. Because there's nothing that doesn't remind me of you, and nothing else I can think about all day... so if you think that you can forgive me for what I've done, I'd certainly like to start over."
She waited for a moment until Dawson lifted her chin up to his eyes.
"How's this for an answer?" he whispered, and his mouth claimed her's. She gasped slightly at the feel of his lips against her lips again, but soon gave into it and kissed back. After a few miuntes, they broke apart.
"But I thought...?" Jen asked breathlessly.
"You think way too much, Jen," Dawson smiled and began to kiss her again. It was only when Jen took a look at the clock when she realized her grandmother would want her home. With a final kiss and a whispered "Good bye", she retreated to her "prison". Dawson watched her go and sighed to himself. Life couldn't get any better.
"Dawson, my man, you have got it all..." he said into the air. Everything was going perfect. He got his girlfriend back, his parents were getting along again, Pacey had finally gotten over Ms. Jacobs, and Joey-
"Hey Dawson."
He looked over to his window to see his best friend climbing through.
"Hey Jo, what's up?"
Joey smiled and spun around in her new clothes, hair, and makeup. Dawson's jaw droppped a full four inches as he saw "his" Joey all made-up.
"Do you like it?" she asked timidly.
"I'm speechless as to how to describe how you look, Joey, but yeah, I like it. A LOT," he answered truthfully.
Joey blushed.
"I'm going to meet Pacey tonight at the docks to have dinner, and I wanted to ask you some stuff before I left," she said. Dawson's head snapped up from looking you-know-where, and stared at her strangely.
"You're going out with Pacey? You two are mortal enemies!" Dawson exclaimed.
"Well," Joey said and sat down on the bed, "I guess so. But things change, Dawson, people evolve. And that's what Pacey and I are doing."
"Oh," Dawson said, "Oh. Well... uh... I guess that's good... Um.. I really don't know what to say... So what is it you wanted to ask me?"
Joey sighed and turned a little red.
"How do guys like girls to act around them? I mean, what should I say? What do I compliment him on, or do I? I need help, Dawson."
Dawson was laughing hysterically inside, but he knew that he had to answer seriously for Joey's sake.
"Look, Jo, you're a great girl, and any guy who asked you out should know that whatever you do or say comes from the heart. Guys are really stupid, I know from experience. Just don't come on too strong.. like don't act really flirtatious or be a prima donna. And don't mouth off. Guys like a girl who can stand her ground, but not someone who's going to insult their every move. Just stick with that. You'll be fine."
Joey ran it over again in her head. Then she smiled.
"Thanks, Dawson, I owe you one. But I've gotta go now, he'll be waiting for me if I don't get going. I'll see ya later, okay?"
"Sure," Dawson answered, "Have a great time. And remember: don't let him get fresh. He should know that no means no."
Joey giggled, and made her way out of the window and down the ladder. She was bouncing with excitement.
Pacey stood at Joey's door with a boquet of tiger lilies, rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet an his heels. He was just about ready to ring the beel when Joey came running up the path. He smiled when he saw her.
"Hey Joey," he greeted her and thrust out the boquet of flowers. Joey took them and breathed in their scent.
"They're beautiful. Let me tell Bessie we're leaving and I'll be right there," she said and ran inside. Pacey sighed to himself.
That wasn't so bad.
Joey came out still holding the flowers and went towards the truck.
"Are you coming?" she asked, smiling at Pacey who was watching her from the front porch. The question registered in his head and he ran to the driver's side, got in, started the car, and drove off.
Pacey pulled up on the docks so that the back of the pick up was facing the water. The moon was already shining brightly in the sky, making the mood incredibly romantic.
He opened the door for his date, and Joey stepped out looking exquisite in the glittering light. She smiled shyly at him and walked with him to the edge of the docks. Pacey began to set up the picnic, and when he lighted the two white candles, Joey was just about ready to cry. He had gone through with all of this for her?
"Sit down," Pacey said softly, and began pouring her a glass of Kool-Aide. She accepted with with a small smile, and closed her eyes as she took a sip. Pacey just watched her, and didn't look away when she put her glass down.
"So..." Joey began, "What've you brought to eat?"
Without word, Pacey pulled out a bowl of fruit salad and a fresh loaf of Italian bread and butter.
"I hope you like this, because I really don't know how to do much else..." he said and blushed.
"It's wonderful," Joey answered as she bit into a small piece of pineapple.
Thank God for big sisters, thought Pacey. He joined her in eating the fruit, and then cut them both a thick slice of bread. Not once during the dinner did Joey have to do anything - Pacey did it all for her.
"No, let me," he would say, and flash her this sexy grin that would make her heart flutter. It was amazing that only a few hours before, she was telling him to get out of her house before he contaminated it, and now she was having the most romantic dinner of her life with the same guy.
"No, it's not the same guy," she said softly, not really knowing that she had spoken aloud.
"What?" Pacey asked, and finished picking up all of the stuff except for the wine glasses which still had Kool-Aide in them. He stuffed the picnic basket in the middle seat, and then helped Joey up from the wooden docks. They stood there, incredibly close to one another, her hands still wrapped in his.
"I... I was just thinking how you're not the same guy I was ready to throw out of my house a few hours ago," she whispered and blushed a deep crimson, though it was dark so he didn't see. She looked down, but Pacey tipped her chin up. His eyes had turned dark.
"You're not the same girl I'm going to kiss right now..." he whispered back and pressed his lips against hers. She immediately kissed back, and put her arms around his neck.
About a hundred feet away, Dawson stood staring in shock at them, while Jen hung on his arm, oblivious to everything that was going on....
As Dawson watched his two best friend's kiss, something welled up inside of him that he had always tried to push down before. Jealousy. Jen was still hanging on his arm, oblivious to reality, and sighing with contentment.
I'm not seeing this, this is not happening, I am not seeing this, this is not happening... Dawson repeated over and over in his head. But in his heart, he knew it to be true.
Pacey and Joey let go of each other, and she looked down with nervous eyes.
"What?" he asked.
"Nothing," she said softly, "Take me home, Pacey."
Pacey was taken aback, that she should say something like this, but complied with her wishes. He opened the door for her and she climbed in. He started the engine, and they drove off, leaving a beautiful moon-lit night behind, and a very jealous Dawson Leery to ponder his feelings for his best friend.
They reached the front step, and she began to unlock the door. Not looking at him, she waved slightly and walked into the living room. She closed the screen door and finally looked at his mournful eyes through the meshed wire.
"Thanks for a nice dinner, Pacey. Good night," she said calmly, then turned to shut the wooden door. He closed his eyes in defeat, nodding his head and turning toward the truck on the dirt path.
When he reached the front door, he turned and watched the light go on in her bedroom window, then a minute later, go off. Pacey was about to get in the truck when Joey came rushing out of the house. She did not hesitate a moment before kissing him fully on the lips. After a while, she let go. Pacey looked at her face, which was as white as her lips were swollen red.
"Is that what you came to tell me?" he asked quietly, half joking. Joey ran her hands up and down his arms.
"Not all.." she whispered. "Stay with me tonight."
"What?" Pacey was completely surprised. He had to make sure that he had heard right...
Had she really said that?
"Jo, are you saying what I think you're saying?" Pacey asked incredulously.
"Yes," she breathed, "I want you to spend the night... with me."
Pacey looked at her to make sure he was hearing correctly. He didn't know what to do. A part of him wanted to stay with her, and the other part told him that it wasn't right - not so soon after Tamara, and because she was JOEY. And what about Dawson? But his teenage hormones took over, and he took her hand and led her into the house.
Joey looked around, her eyes adjusting to the darkness, and then beckoned him upstairs. They tip-toed into Joey's room and locked the door behind them. The lights were off as Pacey crushed his mouth to hers and they fell onto the bed. She pulled at his shirt and it was off in seconds. Hers was the next to go. Soon, the rest of their clothes (except for underwear) were on the floor, and Pacey was ready to pull those off, too.
But then he thought of how Joey was always thinking of her and Dawson being together like this, and he restrained himself.
"Jo, wait-" he said. She opened her eyes and looked into his, which were both dark with passion and dark with seriousness.
"What?"
"This isn't right..." Pacey answered, and rolled onto his side, "You'll - we'll both - regret this if we go any further."
Joey turned to face him.
"But Pacey-"
"No buts. Don't forget... you almost kicked me out of the house a few hours ago," he said and smiled, "And when I kiss you... I know that you're thinking of someone besides myself. Don't lie to me."
Joey sighed, and tears welled up in her eyes.
"I guess I did. But now... I don't know. Maybe you're right. But I don't want - I mean I do... I don't know what I want!" Tears began to fall down her face.
"Shh," Pacey comforted, "You don't have to say anything. Let's just get some sleep, and we can figure this out in the morning. Okay?"
She nodded. He opened his arms for her, and she lay against him with her back to his chest. Soon, sleep enveloped them both.
(The Next Morning)
"Hey, Bessie, is Joey awake?" Dawson asked. It was 10:00 A.M., and Joey hadn't come by yet to help finish the script for Dawson's new movie.
"I don't think so," Bessie answered as she set a plate full of pancakes down in front of Dawson, who began to shovel them down. "She got in kind of late with Pacey. Why?"
"Sha wa thupothed ta come ova an hel me wit ma skipt," he answered through a mouthful of pancakes, butter, and syrup. Bessie laughed quietly at his deformed words.
"After you finish those, you can go check her room. It was locked when I went up there, but I'm sure she'll let you in... And I see you're finished," she said, and took the plate away. Just then, Alexander began to cry in his bassonet in the living room, and she went away top take care of her baby.
Dawson poured himself a glass of milk, gulped it down, and then started up the stairs to look for Joey.
When he reached her room, he heard the shower running, and then shut off in his friend's bathroom. He tried the knob on the door, and found it was open. He heard the shower door open and shut. Then Dawson walked in... on Joey getting dressed and Pacey coming out of the shower in only a piece of white terrycloth.
Joey's head snapped around when she saw Dawson, and Pacey nearly dropped the towel around his waist. Joey's face had a horrified look on it, and she staggered back onto the unmade bed, pulling her shirt over her head.
"Jo? Pace?" Dawson squeaked.
"Dawson, man, this isn't what it looks like," Pacey tried, and then looked at the situation, "Well, maybe it is, but really-"
"No, Pacey, save it. I don't want to hear about your romping and rolling last night," Dawson said with a hurt smile, "You two obviously want some time alone, so I'll just leave now..." He turned around and left the room. Joey still sat on her bed, speechless as to what to say or do.
"Be right back, Jo," Pacey said as he pulled on cotton boxers and a white tee- shirt. He kissed Joey lightly on her cheek, and then dashed down the stairs. Then he realized that Bessie was probably up, and made a mad dash for the door just as Bessie came into the kitchen.
"Dawson!" he called, "Wait up, man!" He ran to catch up to Dawson who was just leaning down to untie the little boat that would take him back home.
"Wait for a sec, man, gimme a moment to explain myself," Pacey said, trying to catch his breath.
"There's nothing that needs explaining, Pacey," Dawson said calmly, but there were tears welling up in his eyes, "You and Joey had... had..." He couldn't even get the words out before the silent tears began to run down his cheeks. He brushed them away, and then sat down on the bank of the river.
"Dawson, we didn't have sex," Pacey answered quietly, "We were going to, but we just slept together. Nothing more."
"You really expect me to believe that? I'm not that dumb Pacey, or blind. You would also say that Joey wanted to do it, and you stopped it!"
"Well," Pacey said in amusement, "That's actually how it DID happen."
Dawson looked at him with cold eyes.
"Dawson, when I was kissing her, it was amazing. But I realized after a while that she wanted it to be you kissing her, your tongue in her mouth, your hands on her-" Pacey was interrupted.
"You don't have to go any further, Pacey, I get the idea. But you're wrong. Joey doesn't think of me like that. She thinks of me as a big brother or something, not a boyfriend," Dawson said, looking down into the cool water.
"And how do you think of her?" Pacey asked.
It was silent for a full three minutes before Dawson answered.
"If I lied, you'd know," he said and sighed. "I saw you two down at the docks last night. Jen and I were there. I thought we were getting back together. But then I saw you two kissing, and I got incredibly jealous. When I walked in her room, I wanted it to be me stepping out of her shower."
"In other words..." Pacey urged him on.
"I love her. I really love her. Not like I thought I liked Jen. But real love," Dawson admitted.
An audience applauded in Pacey's head... but his heart was breaking. He had been trying for months to get Dawson and Joey to realize how much they loved each other, but when Pacey finally got up the nerve to ask her out, they were realizing it. It just wasn't fair.
"Well," he said, getting up, "Tell her. But don't come running to tell me how great everything is for you, or how perfect you are together." He began to walk to the truck, still parked on the dirt path.
"Pacey, wait a sec!" Dawson said and went after him. He caught up and Pacey turned around.
"Look, Dawson, just do what you want. But remember, I was the one in there this morning. Maybe I wanted a chance with Joey, too." He got in the truck and took off, leaving a troubled and confused Dawson behind
Dawson stared after Pacey, a look of total confusion on his face. Not the confusion of choosing Joey or Jen, but the confusion with Pacey. He didn't get it - what had he done?
Okay, so maybe you okayed it that they could go out, but... DevilDawson said.
No buts. You said they could, and they did. You should let Joey decide for herself. AngelDawson replied.
"Will you two please be QUIET!" Dawson said aloud. Then he smiled at himself for that, but his smile disappeared as he heard Joey's tears form her window. He ran into the house through the front door, past Bessie and Alexander, right up to Joey's room.
She was sitting on her bed with her head in her hands, crying to no end. Dawson couldn't bear to see her in so much pain - and it was all his fault.
"Joey?" he said.
"Go away, Dawson, please. Just go away," she answered through sobs.
Instead of obeying her, he went and kneeled down in front of her. He brought her hands away from her eyes and looked at her puffy red face. Dawson almost began crying from the look of her. He blinked away the tears and touched Joey's face.
"I told you to go away," she said weakly.
"Yeah, but that doesn't mean I'm going to obey," he answered. "Joey, please don't cry - I hate it when you cry."
Joey closed her eyes and brought her breathing back to a normal rate. When she opened them, she spoke.
"Dawson, when I came to see you about Pacey, I thought you said it was okay. But I don't know anymore. I don't even know what I feel myself!"
"Pacey told me what happened last night. I know you two didn't... It doesn't matter, anyway. All I want is for you to be happy, Jo, don't you understand that? And if it means being with Pacey, then... I'm happy that you're happy. Don't you understand that that's all that matters to me?" Dawson pleaded.
"Pacey stopped us last night," Joey said quietly. "We were going to, but he stopped. He said that it wasn't right. That when he looked at me, he knew that I was thinking of someone else. And I think he was right."
Dawson brought his face closer to Joey's.
"Then I also have a confession to make. Jen came over the other day, and said she wanted to get back together. I welcomed her with open arms. Literally. But that doesn't mean that the whole time, I wasn't thinking of you."
Joey sniffed. "But I thought...?"
"I love you," Dawson answered, and claimed her mouth in an earth-shattering kiss. It finally was his lips on hers, his tongue in her mouth, and his hands on her body. Joey kissed back in full, thoroughly enjoying the taste of his lips and tongue, and the feel of his hands on her.
When Dawson released her, Joey was breathless.
"The feeling's mutual," she said inbetween breaths. Dawson smiled and touched her hair.
"But what about Pacey?" Joey asked after a moment.
"He's going to be more than a little upset, we both know that," Dawson said and laughed quietly. "But if he really loved you enough to make you wait last night, he'll come to understand."
"I hope so," Joey answered. Then seeing Dawson's face, which had turned a little jealous, she kissed him again. The temperature in the room went up ten degrees with the kiss, and all Dawson could think about was his future with Josephine Potter.
(In orchestra voices) THE END!!!!