Welcome to new members Gary & Lynne Dunkley, Victoria BC, Peter Kreddig, Edmonton Ab, Rick McGrath & Catherine Johnston, Toronto On, Win Muehling & Christine Limmer, Burnaby BC, and John Pharr, Saskatoon Sk. Welcome back to Alan Marsh, Washington DC, and Claude Jacques, Ottawa On.

Sylvia has again done an exemplary job on the the 2-2000 Blurb, a great issue.  Thanks, Sylvia.  Thanks also to Marlies Sands who I forgot to recognize as I pulled together the commentary for the last issue. Marlies (actually a friend of the Sands in England) was the source of the Daily Telegraph cover photo and articles from the Tele and Evening Standard.  The Jim Kenzie article was reprinted from the Toronto Star with the permission of the author.  That front quarter photo of the new Aero 8 sure got a workout! Before I forget, the article "Radiator Technology" in this issue of the Blurb is reprinted courtesy of Old Autos and Bob Bowden, the author. Hopefully it will remove a bit more of the mystery as to why Morgan’s overheat! New member (purchased the 4/4 from Fred & Lynne) Geoff Wheatley has offered several more of the articles he has written for various publications (last Blurb we published "Scrapping in Europe threatens us, too"). They will be proffered as space permits. The usual Saturday morning reading of the papers turned up the "Day Drive in Durham" article (complete with map) by Brian Dexter. Perhaps some of those members in the "east end" of Toronto would like to use this as the basis for a run (Terry Brown??). Further in this issue you will find a travelogue from our intrepid "Interclub Events Coordinator" Ed Burman. As expected the welcome "down under" was a warm one.

Over the winter OLBDII’s, the Presidential +4, 4 seater was apart for what has become routine improvements. This year was the year to remove the old Burman steering box, replacing it with a new Gemmer box. The Gemmer and drop-arm were picked up from Melvyn Rutter back in November (however, if you are contemplating this conversion, check with Morgan Spares, Cantab, ISIS, Old World Restorations, or CMC Enterprises before going to a UK source, the price should be comparable with fewer import hassles). Malcolm Taylor, our resident Triumph guru sourced the collapsible top shaft from a TR7 for me while our other Triumph rebuilder, Chris Taylor, worked his CAD wizardry and had the shop where he works do the necessary extension of said shaft to mate up with the Gemmer through an MGB steering universal. With the help of photos supplied by MCCDC member (and my rally navigator during several MOG East events) Dave Burkette, more hints were provided as to the relatively minor additional work (fabrication of a clamp for the top of the Gemmer short-shaft and minor relocation of the original firewall bracket) the Gemmer was installed. What a difference! First day out was last weekend and the improvement is truly amazing. If you are still wrestling with an old Burman box, do yourself a favour before you give yourself a hernia or worse, miss that line through a corner.

The other chore for the winter was to finally replace the old mahogany board that passed as a "dash". I still had some of the birch 3 mm (1/8 inch) aviation plywood used to refinish the interior panels and used this, laminated to two 3/8 inch pieces of Finnish plywood to create a 5/8 inch 17 ply "board". After cutting and sanding the results aren’t bad – finally I have a lockable glove box, cell-phone outlet, relocated heater switch (no more broken kneecaps!) but did go a bit overboard with a Smith’s quartz clock sourced from Alfa Instruments to match the other gauges. The new look definitely finishes off the old girl…..

Pig Out at the Sands.  Marlies and Alan have confirmed the August 19 date (Saturday) for our annual summer BBQ.  Please mark your calendar.  More info and a reminder of directions to the Sands will be in the next issue.  In the meantime, RSVP's to Marlies and Alan would be appreciated 905-936-4341.

Fall Weekend.  Peter McCowan ensured we got onto this early this year.  We've secured the Mountain Springs Lodge in Collingwood (Blue Mountain) again this year for the weekend of Sept 8 - 10.  That is the weekend before British Car Day (s) at Bronte.  Again this year we are planning the weekend to coincide with the MG Car Club of Toronto "Wayne McRae" weekend to continue the friendly rivalry.  Reservations need to be made before August 1 if you are planning to attend.  Contact MSL at 800-704-8633 (705-444-7776) and mention the "Morgan Weekend" to get the special rates.  Studio is C$84/night, one bedroom suite is $94/night, studio loft $104/night and one bedroom loft $124/night.  Rooms are subject to 7% GST and 5% PST.

Watch your mailbox for the long-promised and anxiously awaited "special issue" of the Blurb featuring the rather erotic work of Valentin Tanase, and more…. Yes, I’ve finally found some time and now have the raw material ready for the paste-up. With a bit of luck it should be the next issue of the Blurb you receive. It will come with a disclaimer – does not represent the views of the club or the executive, etc, etc… only for enjoyment of those who like to fantasize over more than new Aero 8’s.

This last missive from Mary Shier most likely won’t reach you before we start the "trek". Included here to remind you what you missed! "Hi folks -- well we have done the total dry run with John & Sharon Roden.  What a trip!  The weather improved as the day wore on so that by the time we moved onto the Bruce Peninsula the sun was shining brightly and the scenery was spectacular. Our mileage is looking like this:  Queenston to Orangeville -- 224 km and Orangeville to Tobermory is 305 km for an approximate total of 529 km. To hike the escarpment on the Bruce Trail is 465 km so when you consider we're doing the best paved roads with the exception of 5 km of gravel in 2 places, the difference is relatively close.

Now for the bad news. 1) We'd like to gather at Queenston Heights at 8am on Saturday for 2 photo shoots in 2 different locations in the park. We'll meet at the stone cairn in the park. We'll have people watching out for you. 2) The LCBO closes at 5pm on Sunday in Tobermory  -- it's right beside our hotel, which is very nice and right at the harbour.  At this point we can't guarantee our arrival at  "The Tub" by 5 (hopefully between 5 - 6pm)  so you might want to ponder these things in your spare time. Talk to you later. Pray for good weather". 

British Car show on Sat. May 20th in Lewes, Delaware

I wonder if anyone in the DC, MD, PA, DEL, NJ area is planning on attending the British Car show on Sat. May 20th in Lewes, Delaware. Morgan is this year's featured marque. I expect to be there in the +4 and if there will be some other folks attending, perhaps we can all get together for some informal Morgan outing either Friday night or Saturday night. We'll be making this a weekend outing. There's a ferry from Cape May, NJ to Lewes for those coming down from northern locations. So, get back to me if you think we can do something social together centered on the Moggies and the show. Stu Ross: 63 +4 (3/4 and MOPS clubs)

A last reminder. Both opposing weekends are included this year for more driving time for those of you who are more likely to get your cars out and drive them during the weekends.  You will also notice the word "Drivers" has been added to

the title. This marks the fourth annual British Car "Drivers" Week a worldwide event for all British marques with the intent that it will continue to grow in popularity as the years go by. This "awareness" week is intended for all British car owners to get their cars out on the roads in their locality, to have some fun with them, and promote them for all to see and appreciate.

By getting our cars out on the roads at the same time during this week, we can create an awareness in our own part of the world that these unique, charming, fun cars are still around and doing well, thus hoping to create some new or renewed interests in them to help keep our hobby and related clubs and businesses going strong.

Malcolm & Brenda Taylor (with Buster) seem to be modern nomads in their 59 TR3A towing a camping trailer. We’ve been discussing the MOA III events, and a bit further on is discussion on the Around the World in 80 Days event but haven’t heard much yet about our own Canadian long-distance drive "Coast to Coast 2000" organized by Frank & Diana Unrau of St. Albert Alberta. The Taylor’s will be crossing Canada twice – Toronto to Vancouver to start the run, then home again from St. John’s to Toronto. We wish them well and trust there are MSCCC members across the country who will cheer them on and lend a hand if needed.

MOG 30 organized by the Washington DC club will be at the Shawnee Inn on the Delaware River near East Stroudsburg on the Pennsylvania – New Jersey border (Northeast of Allentown, Southeast of Scranton). Events start Friday June 30 in the afternoon with a concours & rally on Saturday July 1, autocross & gymkhana on Sunday July 2. For those staying over for Monday there will be a driving tour of the area or a canoe trip on the river. The Shawnee Inn was built in 1916 so offers not only fine accommodation but plenty of nostalgic charm. 65 rooms have been reserved under the MCC DC. Call early at 800-SHAWNEE. Rate is $110 + 16% tax per night. Room have also been reserved at the nearby Ramada Inn (East Stroudsburg) 800-2RAMADA also under the MCC DC name. Rate is $100 + tax and service. Rooms will be held until May 30, 2000.

As has been the custom for past MOG’s, the MCC DC has kindly offered a concession to Canadians attending – a reduced registration fee. As this year’s MOG is several hours closer to Toronto, Ottawa, and Montreal it would be great to see a significant Canadian "Rumble of Morgans" attend this year. For more info call Ed Geiger at 703-620-0659 or email Ed at efgea@aol.com

Don't forget the Georgetown "Classics Against Cancer" on Father's Day, June 18.  There were 3 British Classes at the event last year (but no Morgans took home trophies), should be at least 2 this year. MSCCC member Neil Young has more information – 519-853-0009 or call the organizers at 905-877-2203. Remember to get there early (before 8:30 am).

MOA III.  I'm rather disappointed in our MSCCC group as no-one has called to take the open seat in OLBDII's for the MOA trip!  Result, I've now pressed my brother, Rod, to at least join me for the first leg (Toronto to New Orleans and back to Montreal).  There is a seat open from Montreal through New Brunswick and Nova Scotia, ferry across to Maine and the last leg down to Hershey Penn. You will need to plan to join up with me in Montreal on Sept 20. We leave Nova Scotia for Bar Harbour Maine on Sept 29 (Sept 20 to Sept 29 is one possible leg if you're interested) and run from Bar Harbour down to Hershey to finish on Oct 8 (another possible leg, Sept 29 through Oct 8).  Let Vern DJ know if you are interest in taking part in all or some of the second half of the trip -- accommodation is shared with me in a non-smoking room. 

For the info of the "Eastern" MSCCC group, there are two Mogs from the BC section of MOG NW (also MSCCC members) attending - Ron & Yvonne Theroux and Ken & Pat Miles.  Other MOG NW members from BC, Marv Coulthard & Elaine Fisher will make a 3rd car from the wet coast.

Greetings Vern! Just a quick update on what is going on. Seems I can't keep at least one foot in the beer business. To clarify, please have a look at my new Beer Lovers' Tour Company website: <http://www.beerloverstour.com/ when you get a second. If there is anyone on your VIP list who might be interested, please take a minute to forward the link. Now in case you were wondering, there is indeed a Morgan twist to this story. As you know, I have always understood there to be a strong yet unspoken connection between the art of Morgan building, driving, repairing etc  and a well crafted pint of Lager or Ale. So you should know, that on my upcoming Beer Lovers' Tour of Britain and Ireland, I had originally hoped to include a tour of the Morgan Works in Malvern as a bona fide highlight. Sadly, Heather Morgan herself very gently informed me via fax that tours for 2000 were not possible due to a supply-demand imbalance -- too many bookings and not enough space. So, my dream was not to be. However, you should know that I do hope to organize a "Morgan Spotting" game during the motor coach rides between the sights. The prize is as of yet not determined, but in honour of our valiant attempt to make the Malvern pilgrimage, perhaps the Morgan Sports car Club of Canada wouldn't mind offering something up!? I leave this to you and the members at the next meeting of the executive. Oh, and yes, I too will be competing and fully intend to win! (so you might as well save time and just send me the prize as soon as you've decided what it is going to be!) Cheers, Oliver

PS The wheels are already turning for a Morgan Lovers' Tour of the UK for 2001. More on this soon.

• What is the correct spelling of "Moggie" or is it "Moggy"? – (Morgan guru Jenny Beer checked the Oxford Dictionary and "Moggy" is the choice).

• The air filter on the twin choke Weber Carb on my car - with 1600cc Ford Kent engine, is a Mickey Mouse affair - messy to use and probably inefficient. Also there’s always the worry of dropping its bolts and washers into the carb. Does anyone know of a filter housing that will accommodate a replaceable paper air cleaner - Dare I say, a Modern set up. I believe one was available when the car was new, but the Morgan Company have no records or plans. Any ideas would be appreciated. Thanks, Terry Brown, RR2, 540 Lyndebrook Rd, Whitby, ON L1N 5R5

Terry also suggests there should be a discount for those members who pay for more than one year at a time. President Vern DJ’s reply: "Terry, tell you what – if more than half our membership write in and request a discount the executive will consider this (the 50% +1 rule that we Canadians all know represents democracy in action). I know Alan Sands will support you on this suggestion but… will he actually write in the request".

May 19-22 Y2K run from Queenston to Tobermory, Ray & Mary Shier (905-877-1427, shier@bserv.com )

July 15 MG Invitational, Glendon College, Toronto info 416-410-5464 or www.MGtoronto.com

Sept 8-10   MSCCC Fall Weekend, Mountain Springs Lodge, Collingwood (organizers needed, please!)

June 18 Father’s Day Picnic, Beacon Hill Park Victoria, 250-652-2159

July 22 Bellevue ABFM, Morgan is featured marque. Gil Stegen 425-883-6722

Sept 2-4 ABFM Portland – 25^th Anniversary of MOG Northwest, Bob Hauge 360-636-6015

Sept 16 All British Vancouver to Whistler run, Ted Carew-Gibson 604-421-3939

July 15 The Trembling Tremblant Run, Mt Tremblant. Ed Burman 613-839-3140
Aug 12 The Hurst Marina Boat and Car Show. Ed Burman 613-839-3140

Aug 27 Moggies on the Grass. At Phantom Farms Ed Burman 613-839-3140

Sept Quyon/Healey Corn roast naturally held in Quyon (date TBA). Ed Burman 613-839-3140
Oct 21 La  Runne de la Grosse Citrouille. Ed Burman 613-839-3140

July 8-9 Canadian Carriage Classic, Tralee Vet Centre. Contact George Temple at 905-857-9583.

Sept 10 18^th Annual Battle of the Brits, Sterling Heights Mich, Sue Snyder 810-979-4875 snydley@home.com

Sept 9-Oct 8 Keith Cox Memorial Morgans Over America – New Orleans to Nova Scotia (see above)

Sept ? – Oct ? Morgans Over America III 2000, The Eastern Experience (see above)

Still lots of MSCCC pins and crests available. Pins are the highest quality 4 color epoxy, 1 inch across, priced at C$12 each. Crests are the MSCCC "badge" on a variety of background colors – black, red, green, blue – at C$10 each. We can also embroider your clothing with the MSCCC crest – send items to Vern DJ. Cost is C$10 / crest. Many of our members have had the MSCCC crest added to shirts with a second club already in place, allows you to advertise your support for two groups at once!

Check with our book suppliers and Morgan agents for "A Morgan Called Red, Brooklands to Laguna Seca" the story of a 1930 Morgan Super Aero 3-wheeler from the day it left the factory, through its fabulous racing career, relocation to America, restoration, and the facts about its present racing career. There are lots of historic photos in the book.

During a recent Antipodean vacation, your Interclub Events Co-Ordinator, and his wife Margaret were able to contact members of both the Australian and New Zealand Morgan Owners clubs.  In Sydney they met (at a lovely pub in The Rocks area.......the Lord Nelson) with Stan Jodeiken, who was featured in the January 2000 issue of The Blurb.  He and his wife Jenny had just returned from a trip to South Africa where they were able to meet with Terry Allan of the SA Mog Owners Group, who lives in Braamfontein, just north of Johannesburg, and whom Margaret and I had met at his home three years ago.  Stan gave me one of the remaining (numbered) Australian Morgan Owners Group 40th Anniversary badges, (1958-1998) which now adorns Megan's badge bar.  An interesting side trip we made while in the Adelaide area was to Birdwood, which is named after a British First World War general, where the Australian National Motor Museum is located.  They have an excellent collection including a vast number of motorcycles ranging in age from 1905 to the present. It is the best collection I have ever seen of M/Cs and that includes Beaulieu, the British Motor Museum near Southampton owned by Lord Montague.  My favourite vehicles were a Type 37 Bugatti, (drool!) a single seater MG Magnette, a 1956 Bentley pick up truck, and a yellow and green Rolls with the usual "Ecstasy" bonnet ornament replaced with a kangaroo.  There is also an old Holden carved out of one solid piece of rock (full size !).

While in New Zealand we were able to contact Martyn and Jenny Elwood-Wade who kindly invited us both for dinner at their hilltop home at Papakura (about 45 minutes out of Auckland).  There we met Ann and Neville Hay (blue '96 +8) and Evan Snyder (red '63 4/4).  Martyn and Jenny also own a +8, which I think is a 1986 model.  Vintage car racing is alive and well in both Australia and New Zealand, and there are many participants from both Morgan clubs according to their newsletters (the Morgan Ear, and Borrowed Times respectively).   We particularly noticed the number of vintage (some would say elderly) cars being driven on an almost daily basis by people in New Zealand and spotted a Triumph Dolomite, an Austin Atlantic, an  Armstrong-Siddely Sapphire, a couple of Morris Minors, a pre-war Alvis, at least one Rover 3500, and lots of MG's (including T types), Triumphs and  Jaguars.   The prize however went to a Hispano-Suiza four door touring model which I saw in Australia and recognized from the Stork hood ornament (it was coming towards us at a good clip so was not easy to identify).

If there are any of you planning visits to the southern hemisphere, please let me know, and I will try to put you in touch with fellow Morganeers there. (Sorry I do not have an contacts in South America at the moment..... but am working on it !) Edward and Margaret Burman

Just a gentle reminder that GoMoG'S main feature (Moggies on the Grass) is going to be at David and Caroline's again this year, even though David has no car!   It will be on August 27th and will feature two (count 'em!) significant anniversaries, my birthday (70th) on August 26th and David's on August 28th (I think he is 56 but don't quote me).    Hope you can make it to this auspicious occasion.     Best wishes. Edward.

New MOG NW Northern Pod representative Ted Carew-Gibson has been very quiet! We’ve had to rely on material from Ron Theroux and Mike Powley (thanks, gents) to fill this slot. I’m sure the latest excuse is "too busy getting ready for the Van Dusen". Sounds like a good excuse to me!

The sidebar from the Toronto Star gives information on when the rally will hit Canada. Other teams brought to our attention:

Hi Guys. The rally goes on, after leaving France they headed out across Italy and the first gravel roads of the event, plus a few hills! This seemed to have caught a few people out with cooling systems being tested to the limit in some cases. One or two cars even had power problems crossing the higher sections, they are going to have to play around with the mixture screws if they want power at higher altitudes. I believe that the highest peak they cross is 10,000 ft and if they have problem in the Italian hills look out for more interesting news when they reach East Asia. Julia (a last minute passenger without passport or change of clothes) is still with the Rolls and has spent the last night on the back seat (due to breakdown problems that appear to come from a not quite fully prepared car! Minds out of the gutter boys!) The Facels (Healey engine) have been running well but were one of those teams with power problems on the
hilly sections. One Team Healey car is still up with the leaders. The vintage event is being led by a Lagonda M45 in joint place with a Citroen 2CV. In the classic section only 14 cars now share first place. Yesterday’s leaders, the Spurlings in the Morgan +4 are now 15^th (another car with altitude sickness!) A nice ferry ride and they are now into Greece.

+ one owner since new

+ black with red leather interior

+ 60 spoke wires with Pirelli P3 Cinturato’s, Koni's front and rear

Peter Toma has his  1989 Plus 8  " FOR SALE ". British racing green, sports seats, leather interior , side curtains and top , all in tan color , third brake light , leather bonnet strap , lefthand drive , fog/driving lamps and more . The car has 24,000 original km and is in great shape. His price is firm at US$48,000. Give Peter a call at 905-309-0890 .     

1970 4/4, 2 seater, 43,000 miles, BRG.  Older restoration, engine rebuilt in the past 5000 miles. Very good condition, full wood dash and door panels, wire wheels, lots of Mog bits (mirrors, lights, badge bar). C$28,000. Photos available. Call Brian Wallace (604) 534-7651, wallace@istar.ca

58 Morgan, previous owner replaced Ford 105E with Cortina 1600 GT c/w Weber downdraft, transmission and dif are original. Sound basic car with no frills. Stainless exhaust, Americanized electricals, no bumpers or side curtains. Body & frame sound, true mileage unknown, driven summers and stored in an indoor heated garage.  Located in Elliot Lake Ontario (Northwest of Sudbury).  Asking $15,000, offers?  Contact Paul Fuller 705-461-9080 pfuller@canada.com

1977 Morgan 4/4 Blue with red interior, only 11,000 original miles, one owner car $40,000Cdn.  $26,500 US Phone Toronto (416) 675-0220 or Toll Free 1-800-265-4187 email: bramclas@idirect.com

The following is from Gerhard Keisling's three wheeler site:

ORIGINAL MORGAN FACTORY TO BE DEMOLISHED! The original Morgan factory built by H.F.S. Morgan in 1905 is due to be demolished if a Malvern garage gains approval to redevelop the site. Brooklyn Ford Ltd. of Worcester Road have submitted plans to Malvern council planning department to replace the historic building with a car wash.

Morgan & Co. Garage and Motor Works were opened in May 1905 to attend to the needs of the ever-increasing number of motorists visiting the town. Harry Morgan also operated Malvern´s first bus service from the site. Following the success of the prototype Morgan three-wheeler at the Olympia show of 1910, the garage business was scaled down and the building adapted to produce the "Morgan Runabout".

Soon after the Great War the company transferred most of the production facilities to its new site in Pickersleigh Road, however, the machine shop remained at the Worcester Road factory until the 1930s. The site was acquired by Bowman & Acock Ltd. in 1936 who were the Morgan agents for the district for many years. In recent years the buildings elegant façade has been disfigured by unsympathetic modernisation, but the structure survives and as such is a valuable part of Malvern´s motoring heritage.

A formal objection has been lodged with the Malvern Hills District Council planning department. However, to successfully defeat these plans it is necessary to gain the maximum amount of publicity and backing possible. If you wish to avoid the destruction of this significant piece of Morgan history, please write expressing your views to the local planning officer at the following address: Mr Duncan Rudge, Planning Services, Malvern Hills District Council, Brunel Building, Portland Road, Malvern, Worcs. WR14 2TB, ENGLAND. THANK YOU.

If you need any further details of the original Morgan garage and factory and how to prevent its destruction please E-mail Martyn Webb [mwebb@merrie-england.co.uk]

A reply: The building's demolished value would be worth more that standing; imagine every brick mounted on a wooden plinth with a brass plaque...who out there in Morganland wouldn't pay $30 bucks without blinking an eye ....would make a nice companion to the MG Works brick.

And another….. My sentiments, too. Isn't it the cars that count? The Bentley works at Cricklewood are gone. The MG factory in Abbington is history (One US company sells bricks from the MG works as momentos). What is so sacred about this building that it needs to be preserved. It isn't exactly a Christopher Wren church, is it!

In my 30 years of working on Morgans I have always jacked the cars up under the lower front cross tube at the front and at the rectangular cross member at the very rear of the car.  These points are absolutely strong enough to pick up the car without any damage to any component.  I would NEVER lift the car by using a jack under the engine oil pan.  To do so is lifting the weight of the car suspended by the engine mounts in TENSION.  The mounts are designed to be loaded in compression and no way are they designed to support more than maybe 75 to 100 lbs. in tension.  The most damage to a Morgan chassis occurs when the car is lifted using a "floor" or "trolley" jack from one side of the car.  When this is done the pad of the jack has a tendency to bend the inner lower flange of the chassis upwards.  This is not difficult to repair, although it is necessary to remove the floors to do it if the damage is under the wood floors.
    

Over the years that I have owned my Morgan, since 1965, the only problem I ever had using the original jack that goes through the hole in the front seat cross member was when I stupidly tried the jack up the car when it was not on level ground without setting the hand brake or blocking the tires on the opposite side of the car.  The car rolled down hill and bent the "pin " of the jack.  There was no other damage fortunately. In every other instance of using the original screw jack it worked fast, well and safely.

The differential is a perfectly safe place to jack the car from; the tubes are welded into the center casting at four rosette welds per side and are in no danger of damage from jacking.  Hard racing can cause the welds to fail.  The diff can be a little difficult to reach because it is so far under the car and depending on the tires and your jack there may not be clearance.

When using a floor jack under the rear cross member or when jacking from the side of the car, be sure to "hook" at least two of the ears of the jack pad inside the inner edge of the chassis so that the car cannot slip off of
the jack.  THIS LAST IS VERY IMPORTANT!  I have seen cars slip off of jacks when this was not done.  The damage can be extensive and expensive! (If you don’t believe Greg, just ask Ray Shier!)

First webhead: "Hi, XXXX. If you substituted Harley Davidson for Morgan, I would heartily agree with the "substitute for the inadequate" description of the article. If anything, it has been my observation that men with Morgans have the most tolerant and best-looking wives and girlfriends of any group, so Morgans and Morgan drivers must attract the best of the fair sex, (starting with your own bride, to be sure!).

One of these days I'm hoping that my Plus 8 will attract the proper attention. (Perhaps that's beyond the power of ANY car in my case!) Meanwhile I will continue to enjoy the challenge of driving my car briskly or just cruising leisurely through the countryside. I am looking forward to seeing both you and your bride in Canterbury. It's my turn to buy the pints."

Second webhead: "Here we go again. A load of rubbish. I wanted a Morgan long before I knew what my gearshift was for. My wife only has a mild interest in the Morgan, so there goes the second part.

One of my friends described Harley Davidson’s like a large fat girlfriend... Good to ride, but nothing you want to show off to your buddies... ;) A Norton Commando featherbed on the other hand... UK cars and mc's rule ! (hehe that was behaving like an adult!)"

And the first webhead’s reply: "HEHEHEE. Now that one was self-serving  - just to keep the peace! By the By -- Leave Harley Davidson out of it - some of us ride ‘em just for fun and to annoy our neighbors early in the morning! XXXX 77 HD XL Show Custom (2nd place winner 1999 so there!!!!!)

P.S. Do you think the author of the Times article was jealous?! Perhaps he doesn't like women. Both?

1.  Never trust a dog to watch your food.  (Patrick, age 10)
2.  When your dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" don't answer him.  (Michael, age 14)
3.  Never tell your mom her diet isn't working.  (John, age 13)
4.  Stay away from prunes.  (Randy, age 9)
5.  Never pee on an electric fence.  (Robert, age 13)
6.  Don't pull dad's finger when he tells you to.  (Emily, age 10)
7.  Don't squat with your spurs on.  (Billy, age 9)
8.  When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair. (Melissa, age 11)
9.  Never allow your 3-year-old brother in the same room as your school assignment.  (Ann, age 14)
10. Don't sneeze in front of mom when you're eating crackers. (Mitchell, age 12)
11. Puppies still have bad breath even after eating a Tic-Tac. (Andrew, age 9)
12. Never hold a dust-buster and a cat at the same time.  (Ramona, age 9)
13. You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.  (Joey, age 10)
14. Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.  (Kelly, age 11)
15. If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse.  (Jill, age 14)
16. Felt markers are not good to use as lipstick.  (Lauren, age 9)
17. Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat. (Tommy, age 10)
18. When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's on the phone.(Lee, age 13)
19. Never try to baptize a cat.  (Eileen, age 8)
20. I know God knows when you are bad, but it's your parents you have to worry about. (Sam, age 9)
21. Never spit into the wind.  (Ricky Age13)