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"PC users are evil...I don't like them...I used my 5400 to generate a precise procedure for brain operation on PC users...damn PC users are physically inferior to the holy Mac addicts. They have to be eliminated!" -Jeffrey Dahmer |
ABOUT MWA
Macintosh Worshipers Association is founded in 1998 by a group of passionate Mac users. The minister of the MWA is also the webmaster of this wonderfully created site. He will be your spiritual guidance and serve as a channel between you and the holy Mac force. The purpose of the MWA is to unite all the Mac lovers from all around the world. Mac users of the world, unite! If you're interested in making a donation, please send a mail here. ||TOP||
THE WONDERFUL THINGS YOUR MACINTOSH CAN DO FOR YOU
- A different-thinker, John Lennon, has once said "All you need is Mac." As the minister of MWA, I can't tell you how absolutely correct this statement is. You don't need love, friendship, and/or a social life. All you need, my brothers and sisters, is a heavenly Macintosh computer. Amen!
- Mac provides an exciting sexual stimulation mostly to post-teen male Mac users. Have you seen the sexy design of the all-one-G3? Or the too-sexy-it-hurts iMac? Oh mama! Who needs lovers when you have a Mac, a slice of cold leftover pizza, and a Sears catalog?
- Every Mac user knows that God uses a Macintosh. So we can send him a personal email using our Mac(he only reads mails sent from Mac). Bless the big guy!
- It's a clinically proven fact that prolonged exposure to Mac can prevent male-patterned baldness and early incompetency.
- The hit TV sitcom, Seinfeld, is brought you by Apple. Remember the Macs on Jerry's desk? Without Apple, there would be no Seinfeld.
- Mac can be used as a vibrator in enhancing the sexual stimulation. Refer to the Macintosh User's Manual for detail.
- Mac makes you cool and popular. By wearing a Mac single-button mouse as your belt, you can attract a lot of attention from the opposite sex.||TOP||
- Your Mac loves your attention. So give the happy-face a juicy French kiss every time you startup your computer.
- It's highly understandable if you find yourself deeply in love with your Mac. It's encouraged by the MWA to physically demonstrate your love in public places. Remember to use protections.
- Just between the Worshipers, the Mac processor tends to get overheat more easily than Pentium chips. So when the room temperature exceeds 60 degrees, it's recommended to shut off your Macs and computing manually.
- The top of the all-in-one G3 should be shampooed at least twice a week. Mild shampoo is recommended.
- Defragment the hard drive at least once every three hours. The Mac OS does not come with a built-in defragmenter so use Mr. Norton's Mac Love Potion.
- Be patient with your Mac. Never lay a hand on your Mac! Never! If it crashes, just give it half a day and it'll eventually come back.||TOP||