Virtue has never been as respectable as money.
-Mark Twain
He may look like an idiot and talk like an idiot but don't let that fool you. He really is an idiot.
-Groucho Marx
I hate rap music and the white man that invented it.
-Kyle Abram
Life is like a box of chocolates and I'm a diabetic.
-Caleb Harper
Time wounds all heels.
-Groucho Marx
When caught between two evils I generally pick the one I've never tried before.
-Mae West
You can only be young once but you can be immature forever
-Tim Noble
In truth, we are hitting the prime of our lives and our sexual lives and all we have to look forward to is saggy tits and a bed pan.
-Bryan Smith on growing old
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