My mom had thrown a going-away party for me. There were probably hundreds of people in our house. All over the walls were different photos from various times in my life, framed for display. I was the center of attention, greeting everyone and thanking them for coming. It wasn't that bad...except I really had to pee.

I went into bathroom minor hoping for some relief, when I saw that it too had been turned into a display room. My dad and Mark Kubik were in there talking along with several other people. Mark congratulated me and I shook his hand, and then I bent down to pick something up from the floor. It seems like it was a pencil. As conversation progressed, it became apparent that this wasn't late September--this wasn't a "Goodbye America" thing--this was the present, and I was to be leaving Lancaster and moving on to the real school. Lancaster was just a stopping point. This was distressing to me. First off, if this were a Neal-is-leaving-America thing, it wouldn't be that bad because I'd see everyone when I returned. But that wasn't the case. I was leaving Lancaster, and therefore leaving behind all of the people I met in this short time: Emma, Christy, Mark, Andy, Dave, Dan, Alan, etc. I would be leaving them, and I wouldn't be seeing them again. Even worse, I realized there was no way to properly say goodbye before I'd have to leave.

Anyway, I just couldn't take it anymore. I just started going on the floor. Someone was sitting on the toilet talking and I didn't have the patience to ask them to move. Without getting too graphic, it felt SO good and I wizzed for probably 2 minutes.

I woke suddenly in terror thinking back to my childhood: whenever I dreamt of going to the bathroom as a kid, I always went in real life, and rarely was I standing at a toilet in my sleep. I felt the sheets and was extremely relieved to find that I had not wet the bed. I did have to pee pretty bad though. I got back to sleep and the dream continued...

I left the house and went back to my dorm room (as if they were near each other) for a while. I painted something green and then went to bed. The next morning, I decided I needed to walk about the campus and soak it in since I'd soon be leaving. It was far more lush and green than I had remembered (possibly because it wasn't the same campus...), but it still felt like a part of me. All around, I was seeing new people, realizing that these were the new faces who would fill the places of me and others. I knew that Mandy and Dietz were coming to Lancaster, so I figured they were probably around somewhere.

It didn't take me long to realize that I forgot to get dressed before leaving my room. I wasn't naked, I just didn't get past the underwear/shoes/backpack stage. Actually, contrary to my expectations, I wasn't that bothered or embarrassed. Not to say that I have a physique to flaunt, but I think maybe I was just so oblivious and apathetic to those around me that I really didn't mind if they were pointing and stuff. And as I remember, I don't think anyone really noticed. So I guess I saved myself the problem of being self-conscious of something that's undetectable by others.

I started going back to my room and saw Mandy walking along. I said hi.

I find it kind of interesting that I had two of the most common or at least most feared dreams from a typical childhood--a bet-wetting provoker and a go-to-school-(almost) naked dream all rolled into one, and even cooler was that I seemed to conquer those scary aspects. Neat.

Return to The Dreams Page.