Lettuce to the Editor

What's it worth?

A bookmark is worth the minute space on your hard drive for the entry...
A link on your page is worth the space on your server...
But a memory is worth the space in your brain!
You deserve the brain space!!!
Thanks!

Howie, The Master! Come visit the Manor!

Editor sez...
Um, thanks for the sentiment, I think.

Call for help!

HELP...mutant hampster broke out of cage and is eating.....huge hamster pellets everywh..... LOOK OUT.......teeth..........please, anyone hearing this messa............send the army! Must stop...........OH NO! They a...........breeding.... AHHHHHHHHHHHHH*

Name omitted

Editor Sez;
Anyone who spells hamsters with a "P" deserves to be eaten.

Sub editor also sez;
glug, glug glug (who opened a window)? I've been there. Hampster Health. Nice place, didn't like the people though, but lovely place.

Loco-parentis

Congrats, Your disclaimer is the mother of all disclaimers,
Len
Legal dept sez;
Why thank you, but I think you'll find, if you check the genitalia, that it is in fact the father of all disclaimers. An easy mistake to make though, although I thought the 'tosh would give it away... still... these are the enlightened nineties (so I've been told by a young nipper in publicity) and it is not uncommon for a lady to be seen sporting upper lip hair.
Insults

I came to your site via a friend's recommendation, and I agree with them most strongly. Your paper is absolute drivel.
Keep up the Good Work. :)

PTS, Tasmania
Not the editor sez;
Why thank you. Almost a backhanded complement there, and, as all of us who know anything about Tennis knows, they are quite difficult to pull off... although the last time I said that to someone, he did in fact pull it off and it wasn't the same afterwards - even though we managed to superglue it back on. Still, such is life. Isn't it?

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Yours, .