HT:Sport!

The end.

Football! Football! Football!

England Vs Italy... nil points. What can we say. A draw. Doh! After all that hard work... all that support... we get nothing. Yes, we wanted blood. We wanted them to wipe Italy's nose in a resounding victory. Still, at least we didn't loose.

We spoke to a turkey who was supporting Italy on Saturday, and he had this to say.

"Gobble gobble? Gobble-gobble-gobble. Gobble GOBBLE gobble. Gobble?"

Well, we think that says it all really. But of course, we couldn't simply report this without looking at all the exciting hype that went on before the afforementioned match.

Gazza's darkest hour?

Rumours were about that Gazza would be arrested the second he arrived on Italian soil. While most of us are probably thinking "Its about time", there was a legitimate reason for the arrest. A long while back, Gazza did something that we all would like to do. He assulted a papparazzi photographer back in 1994 and was convicted this year in his absence...

Italian's make English football great.

Italy boss Casare Maldini claimed that English football was a pile of elephant dung, and it was only great Italian players such as Gianfranco Zola that saved the English Game. Glenn Hoddle said

"Thats a load of dingo's kidneys. Everyone knows that English are the best. That Italian players in the football leagues make up only a small proportion of the total number of players, and in fact, while some Italian's are really good, most have crab legs and tend to walk sideways a lot."

Pizza good thing!

Pizza played a big part of the England - Italy runup. Why, only last Thursday, the HT: Team decended upon the house of an unsuspecting individual and ate pizza. Quite nice it was too - although we decided against ordering one of the Italy / England specials. Of course, the night was quite nice, and totally unrelated to sport. So, it might be best that we ignore it.
The England / Italy pizza's in question, tend to revolve around a square based pizza with the Italian and the English flags.

Of course, Pizza isn't the only special football food - Special sausages have been created by a certain butcher, with such names as Gazza's Banger Glenn's Gobbler and Seaman's thingy.

Violins break out

The Italian police, as everyone knows now did a discusting thing to our supporters and caused violins to break out over the English supporters stand. We think the whole thing was discusting and the police should be tied up and have rotten fruit thrown in their general direction.

The end.