The Conical Hatter was raised by lesser known cartoon superheroes: 

Popeye's Evil Twin, The Incredible Sleeping Woman and Tarzan of Texas.

My mother lost me in a poker game 

to traveling circus gypsies and thus

 began my love affair with hats

and costumery in general.

    The 70's were a dark time where

    I lived in a nightmare state

    brought about by the constant fear

    of forgetting my locker combination.

    I still hung with the movers and shakers

    of the hat world though.

The 80's and 90's came and went.     

I dunno where they went or why,     

and I don't have time to look for them.     

I was busy.     

I may have slept through them.     

My not-so-wee ones have careers of their own.

One is an

alligator/Weiner dog wrestler

by day, ant rancher by night.

The other one studied to become

a professional whale whisperer

and now has wee ones of her own. 

Apparently superheroes run in our family.

 These days I

visit alternate realities.

Always well hatted.