Religious Theory

Here's a comparison of Religious Theory in the late 20th Century . . .

Capitalism- He who dies with the most toys, wins.
Hari Krishna- He who plays with the most toys, wins.
Catholicism- He who denies hmself the most toys, wins.
Anglican- They were our toys first.
Greek Orthodox- No, they were OURS first.
Branch Davidians- He who dies playing with the biggest toys, wins.
Atheism- There is no toy maker.
Polytheism- There are many toy makers.
Evolutionism- The toys made themselves.
Church of Christ, Scientist- We are the toys.
Communism- Everyone gets the same number of toys and you go straight to hell if we catch you selling yours.
B'Hai- All toys are just fine with us.
Amish- Toys with batteries are surely a sin.
Taoism- The doll is as important as the dumptruck.
Mormonism- Every boy can have as many toys as he wants.
Voodoo- Let me borrow that doll for a second . . .
Hedonism- To heck with the rule book! Let's play!
Hinduism- He who plays with the bags of plastic farm animals, loses.
7th. Day Adventist- He who plays with his toys on saturday, loses.
Church of Christ- He whose toys make music, loses.
Baptist- Once played, always played.
Jehovah's Witness- He who sells the most toys door-to-door, wins.
Pentecostalism- He whose toys can talk, wins.
Existentialism- Toys are a figment of your imagination.
Confucianism- Once a toy is dipped in water, it is no longer dry.
Non-denominationalism- We don't care where the toys came from, let's just play with them.
Agnosticism- It is not possible to know whether toys make a bit of difference.


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