struggling
searching for that string of strength
that ounce of perspective
demons tossing me with full force,
draining motivation
altering ability
to succeed

that frail being in the corner
sinking into the wall
yearning to release this brokenness
to vanish,
become unified with this state
of nothing 
of everything

that stocky giant, unexplainable outcast
molding into the chair
crying with her laugh, hoping 
to be recognized,
insides, outsides swollen to extremes
pain corresponding with 
this extensive fat tissue...

a dreamer
unlike the average adolescent creature
knowing of her horrible incapability
knowing of her unique wisdom,
curious about her inaccurate
self-hatred
destructs self
strengthens no one