january
6,
22,
friday,january 6, 2006
Happy New Year
i've started a new diet. it's the Biggest Loser diet. jeff bought the book and dvd for me and i went online and joined the club.
a lot of my entries in here are going to be message board entries that i've made on the club message boards. i hate having to try to write too many journals.
i've also resolved to write more in my paper journal this year. i use to fill a journal up in a month. i've now had the present journal for a little over a year and i'm not even 1/2 way through it.
so sit back... lots to write about if i will only get myself to come here and write!
happy new year all..... and my turtle firend, if you are still out there somewhere i've not forgotten about you!
love and support to all!
sunday,january 22, 2006
Biggest Loser - my style
The Road And The Radio
(Casey Beathard/Kenny Chesney)
Ain't nothing out here but me, the road and the radio,
Looking for an exit and a song that I might know.
An' countin' down the memories an' addin' up the miles,
Searchin' for a feelin' I ain't felt in a while.
Clarity an' inspiration:
Happiness is a destination that's hard to find.
It may take some time.
But in my mind there's somethin' more
An' I'll open up a brand new door,
An' find the strength to close the ones I left behind.
An' I'll get there leanin' on some friends I know:
The road and the radio.
i've been really trying hard to turn into that person i've always wanted to be. thin and happy and, yeah, happy - did i say that. i started working out on the 1st. i mentioned in my last entry that i was going to write more here... and in my paper journal. that was a resolution i made... and i haven't really done a good job of stickin to that one. I HAVE, however, stuck to my diet and exercise plan. i'm super excited about it.
the lyrics above have been very inspiring. while i'm excited to be losing weight and just getting healthier, i'm plagued by thoughts of who i use to be. i had some good times.. or good moments, but there are always the bad ones. and for some reasons it's the bad ones i remember most. so. i'll "open up a brand new door, an' find the strength to close the ones i left behind! an' i'll get there leanin' on some friends i know:
the road and the radio!
they have always been good friends. i could drive a million miles as long as i have good music to listen too.... but, in the last few weeks i've discovered new friends... and i've been leaning on them a lot. after aaron, i felt like i was an ass to think that i was friends with someone i never met... that i was close to someone who was thousands of miles away. but, i think that experience taught me that friends "on here" are different. they are supportive people. and, as long as they say what i want to hear (or perhaps, need to hear) they are friends. hmmm.. i guess that would make aaron a friend. one that i miss having in my life very much.
so i'm on this journey now. i've not lost a lot of weight, but i do feel better. it's strange, before i was married all i could think about was making myself look better so i'd catch someone's eye in a bar or somewhere like that. now that i'm married i realize that it's just about making myself look good and feel good for me. i know that if i stay on this trek i will be not only a happier person, but a better wife and hopefully a great MOm.
i've got to go for now. i'm looking into change the looks of this place. i'm getting bored with the yellow. but, i need to brush up on my html skills! i'll be back.... soonish or something. **cheers**
just in case blair is around, congrats hun! you will be the best dad a boy can have!