lately

           Well, I've promised myself a thousand times again and again that I wouldn't ever let myself fall back into that depression and loneliness. But, I'm afraid, I've begun to let myself do that once again. And sometimes, many times, I'm afraid that I can't stop myself.
           Lately I've been REALLY lonely and getting depressed. My new poetry page shows that fact very clearly. I've been ignoring my duty of reading the word and staying in prayer with God and found myself alone with nothing to do but sit around and think.
           Part of the reason that I've been feeling so down lately is the fact that I'm feeling as though I've been working in vain, and that no one ever even reads anything I write. After all, I've written so much, how can they get to the good stuff if they're busy reading this other crap that I spill onto the page. Anyway, I don't know how soon these feelings will turn around.
           But, I was reading through the entries in my guestbook and I guess it kinda helped, though nothing secure. I'm going to do my best to get back into the word and to get back into prayer with Lord, hopefully He will take away the loneliness that I can't seem to shake off of.
           Why did I write this? I have no idea.

Written by:
Jonathan Johnston


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