Is It Something I said?


If you are reading this you probably subscribe to The Fiver.  The daily
football (soccer) newsletter run by The Guardian newspaper in the UK.

You have also probably received a profane message from a Cheltenham
student asking to be unsubscribed and asking you to go forth and multiply.
 

I am that student.


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The Story so Far....

I have been trying to unsubscribe to The Fiver as a sort of hobby for a good few months.
It's not as boring as stamp collecting, less seasonal than topiary and consumes fewer man-hours
than warez trading.  I was getting tired of my hobby.  The usual rush of excitement when I
fired off another message to 'The Boss' was not there anymore.  The anticipation of seeing
The Fiver arrive faithfully in my trash bin was waning, in short it had become less than a hobby
and more of a chore.

One fine November day I was in college actually working when I noticed the usual Fiver
shaped E-mail bouncing happily to my computer.  I felt annoyed.  I'm not proud of what I did
next, I snapped.  I replied to the mail and sworeat the Fiver.  Leave me alone I thought, I don't
want your run-down of tabloid regurgitated gossip, your faintly amusing tales of yesterday's news
stories. To be honest it could have been the Starr Report for all I knew, I hadn't read it for a long time.

The reply went bad on me.  'The Boss' never saw it.  Everyone else did though.  They quickly told me
what they thought of my tiny missive.

"Hurrah" said some, "I've been unsubscribing too!"

"Boo" said others, "My kids read a rude word"

 "I've told your teacher" said a few

 "I know where you live" said one

"How's Cheltenham?" said a couple.

"I'm not in right now" said most.
 
 

What had I done?  How many irate Fiver readers were there?
 
 

Read On...
 

I thought I had it bad!
 

The End
 

I used to be a contendaaaah
 
 
 

Go to The Guardian
 
 

Here's my CV for everyone who wanted it
 

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Umm, pot luck really.


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