I'm bringing them two loaves of zucchini bread to my garage on Monday. The stuff is good enough to be currency and I felt bad that they put all that time in and couldn't find the problem. It's frustrating to all of us.

The only solution we have is to bring it in regularly and see if we can identify when the alternator is going out and then see if they can find the problem at that point. Mike said with all the stuff that they checked and potentially readjusted that it might have already been fixed without them knowing it.

I just know it's bad when you're contemplating asking your parents for a car loan. I told my brother that I was at that point and he just said,"DON'T DO IT! RUN SCREAMING FROM THE ROOM!"

He's right of course, but I still need a damned car. Borrowing money from my parents still sucks big wang.

Speaking of sucking big wang, I want to know why the voters have put their heads up their collective asses. I can't believe that people are actually contemplating electing George Bush for president. I'll grant you that Al Gore is hardly better, but George Bush?

The guy has the brains of a squished toad. If he pulled the Reagenesque,"I can't recall" we'd actually be apt to believe him. He's dumber than a doorknob. He's charming, but sooooo stoooopid. And what sucks for Al Gore is that he actually has some okay ideas but Clinton's been so busy fucking everyone in a skirt, that Al's kind of been screwed over (in a multitude of ways) by Clinton's smaller brain, i.e., Clinton's penis. I like Al Gore's environmental policies and am impressed by that. His personality lacks the charm of Bush, I'll grant you.

However, I'm absolutely horrified at the prospect that George Bush thinks that it's the government's place to climb into women's uteri and make unilateral decisions for them. If I don't want to have a baby, I shouldn't have to, frankly, just because some old fart male politician group said so. It would be one thing if men actually paid child support, but I think the stats I last heard were along the lines that only 30% of men who should be paying child support actually do so. Add that to the fact that women are still making only two-thirds of what men do, and there's a serious financial reason for a woman to choose not to bring a baby in the world.

I am not pro-abortion. I've had two. They sucked and I'd much rather have a baby than an abortion at this point. I'm for the choice. I think women know what they can live with and that a decision like that should be between a woman and her doctor. I'm not fond of late-term abortions, i.e, the so-called partial birth abortions, but frankly, anyone having an abortion at that point is likely going to be someone who really wanted to have that baby and now something is horribly wrong and the best medical decision for her is to have an abortion. I figure she's agonized over it a lot at that point. I know I would, as would most of the women I know.

The idea that politicians should have a say in a decision that personal is probably the most disgusting thing I've ever heard. I used to have a T-shirt that said,"US out of my uterus." It's too much of a slogan to be accurate. A slogan you'd never see on a t-shirt, but which I firmly believe in: "Government out of my personal life."

Much in the way that I didn't think the government had any right to rake the president over the coals for where his penis was, I don't think we have the right to make medical decisions for women either. (Have you heard about the camp on the Russian River where all the politicians go and spend weeks getting totally drunk off their asses and fucking prostitutes? Clinton's got nothing on some of the stuff I heard Nixon was doing.) Kicking Clinton's can for breaking commandments and marital commandments is his minister's and his wife's job. I'm betting a smart bright woman like that has made his life a living hell. Go Hillary!

I'll grant you that I wasn't impressed that the president was such a skirt-chaser, but people have been saying we were the laughing stock of the world. Frankly, the reason we were the laughing stock wasn't because our president was screwing around, but rather because we nearly impeached him for it. I had several European friends making fun of Americans for being such prudes. Mind you I don't approve of extra-marital affairs, but I don't think it's any of my business -- public figure or not. Lots of people have affairs, that doesn't mean they should get fired.

Morality is so judgemental and so subject to whim. What's moral to some is immoral to others, but the cool thing is that we're not having to vote for or against Clinton, but rather the man in the shadows that had to go to all the boring stupid presidential functions when the president didn't want to go: Gore. Gore's been willing to get his hands dirty and work hard as a president. He's good at it. Okay, it's not a ringing endorsement, but I think Gore's better than the alternatives. Ralph Nader is a bit too far left for me, but Bush makes me want to get out my clinic defense shirts and signs out of the closet and tug my kids along with me to help me hold the lines in front of clinics again.

I kind of like the idea of that movie with Richard Pryor in it in which voters elect a write-in candidate of "none of the above." I tell ya, I'm tempted.