I want someone to pick me up, pat my back, hold me, burp me and tell me I'm the cutest widdle thing they ever did see. I want someone to do something foofy to my hair. I want breakfast in bed and a massage and a box of bonbons that I can dribble down my chin.

I want to lay around in bed all day like a slug, wrapped in warm blankets and not have to do a damned thing. I want a water bed that doesn't hurt my hips and that kind of slides up under my belly holding her, so she doesn't kick the bejeebers out of me when I lay on my side. I want someone to bring me water throughout the day and a catheter at night, so I don't actually have to get up to pee 6 times.

I want my allergies to go away. I'd like them to pack up their bags and move to a small deserted island far far away.

I want someone to pat my hand and say, "You poor pitiful pregnant thing."

Today, I am that little kid on that baby shampoo commercial who gets mad everyone is using her shampoo and she stamps her little feet and defiantly says,"I'm the baby!"

But again, I am still the Mom. I took Bear to the doctor's yesterday and found out that I am the worst mother in the world because he has a bad case of sinusitis. The doctor seemed to think he might have been like that for a bit, which would explain why he's had these whiny pissant moments off and on for three weeks. The problem is that the kid isn't wiping his nose at all and I've been giving him dimetap when he has complained, but truthfully, I took him in to talk to Dr. Mike about the baby and at the same time, knowing that he had to be suffering from allergies like his mom, but not anticipating that he'd have a full-blown sinus infection.

The other cool thing is that Dr. Mike and he talked about what will change in his life when the baby comes. And boy, doesn't it take a pediatrician to see into the mind of a child. Dr. Mike said that not a lot will change and that his only job will be to teach his baby sister to smile and later he'll get to teach her how to play. Dr. Mike also told me to be sure to maintain the same schedule that we have now for him, so things really don't change much for him. We'd planned to do that anyhow, but this was reassuring. Russell was still under the impression that he was going to have to take care of the baby, even though we've told him a bazillion times that that simply wasn't his job. When we left, Russell said he was feeling a lot better about things and we actually had a really nice afternoon after that.