Christmas time in the X-mansion was getting into full swing as usual. The boxes had been broken out, forgotten relics exclaimed over, wreaths and mistle toes hung on doors. Even the smell of the annual Christmas pudding could be detected waffling through the house. Jean sighed contentedly as she survived the festive atmosphere that she had help to create. Christmas time, another year finding them safe, happy, and together. And this year? This year was going to be different , because this year the Parias were staying.
BWHAHAHAHAHA
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Personality #1 //Was that - like really necessary?
Personality #2::Okay ... Are you writing this or am I?
//It's just that ... what's wrong with just a nice Christmas tale of the X-Men - no Parias.
:: Boring .
//Comon I mean it. These kids get in so much trouble ... someone should just shot them and put us all out //of their misery.
::Now that's Christmasy.... "Welcome to the X-Men Christmas Bloodbath special!"
//Hey - lots of red!
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With one last finishing touch to the Nativity scene, she turned around, only to be confronted by six faces staring at her in confusion.
"What are you doing?" Jonathan looked around in astonishment at the assortment of Red and Green that had previously been a perfectly acceptable main hall.
"Putting up Christmas decorations .... what else?" She didn't notice them shift uneasily. Unconsciously Lexi took a step back. Christmas - was that what she had said?
"You aren't suppose to say that you know."
Jean smiled at them before noticing their worried faces. "Say what - 'Christmas'? " She repeated it louder, causing Jonathan to cringe.
{We don't celebrate ... } Lindsey paused, concentrating { ... Christmas. It's against the law}
Now it was Jean's turn to stare at the six of them in astonishment.
"Whose law?" She demanded, not believing her ears.
India explained, "When Scarab first arrived, he told us about on his world, there were no religions, how they had discovered that religions only divide, not unite people. How much better our world would be if people stopped clinging to their outdated beliefs and stepped into the 20th Century."
"What was ironic " Moe added bitterly " Was that he said that eliminating religion would eliminate Holy Wars and unspeakable acts of terrorism, but in his quest to end it, he killed more people then had ever died in the name of religion before."
Jean couldn't believe what they were telling her.
"I can't believe, that one man .. no matter how powerful could eliminate the vestiges of religions that have been maintained for over thousands of years."
"He couldn't. " Jonathan nodded knowledgeably at her, "Extremist fractions developed, went underground. Many were wiped out completely in the rebellion of '92 when Scarab went after them. The only ones that survived were the ones who left the continent. The Jewish fraction united with the Arab one, and together they have become the last stronghold of established religion in the middle East. But people say it's only a matter of time before it dies too. They've lost mainstream support."
No religion, no Christmas. Jean started at them, wondering at how their lives must have been. They stared back. To them it was perfectly normal.
"We've heard stories and all, but " Daemon gave her a surmising look " No one believes them. How on earth could one man carry all those toys around with him?"
Jean smiled at this. "That's not what Christmas is about."
"Well.. " Lexi shot her a puzzled look "What is Christmas all about - Why do all this silly stuff? What's the point?"
Jean stared at them. Xavier had never really bothered to find out much of the alternate dimension that these 6 inhabited, assuming it was pretty much the same. It obviously wasn't. She never thought she have to explain the meaning of Christmas.
"It's about love, and family, and celebrating our happiness."
They exchanged glances
"Sounds pretty corny to me."
Jean struggled. She wanted them to understand, but how to tell someone. Suddenly an answer hit her. This way they could discover the true meaning of Christmas on their own.
"Listen.. Each year the orphanage on the other side of town has a Christmas celebration. How about the six of you work on a play and present it to the orphans?"
They all stepped back, looking for a way out.
"uhh... sounds thrilling...but no thanks ... we don't want to know that badly."
Jean glared at them. Jonathan gulped, that had apparently been the wrong answer.
" I mean. .we would really like to and all but - "
"Great !" Jean cut them off. "You can do the Nativity play, you'll find it in the library. You have a week - good luck."
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... In the library...
" nativity play? What's that?"
"Well " Moe frowned in concentration. "Nativity means birth. So I would assume it's a play about a woman giving birth."
"EWWWWW" Daemon wrinkled his nose in disgust
"And this is a play for kids?!?!?! "
"Well , I might be wrong, we can go check it out."
The others stared at her in amazement "What? Like now? We have a week."
"listen " Moe rounded in on them "all we have done here since we arrived is screw up. "
"It wasn't our fault - "
"It doesn't matter. You heard Scott - if we do one more thing wrong that's it - out the door. And we have no place to stay, no money, and nothing to eat. Whatever the point of this Christmas thing is, it is obviously very important to these people .. .and we are not. - I repeat - ARE NOT going to screw this up as well. Got it?"
She gave the house glare, and slowly everyone nodded.
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One week later ... approx. 15 minutes before curtain rises.
Moe stared at the four people standing around her in satisfaction. It had taken a lot of hard work and innovation to get them to this point, but they had done it. Casting had been a nightmare, Lindsey had won the draw about the three wise men, effectively giving the mute boy the most lines out of almost all of them. At that point Moe had decided to go with a narrative format. Which then in turn, had forced them to rewrite the script. The wise man's present had been impossible to find, and they had to use substitutes... But nevertheless, they were all here, in costume and ready to go. Except ... were the hell was Lexi? She shrugged, the cow wasn't needed until the second scene anyway.
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In the audience.
Jean snuggled deeper into her chair as she turned to her husband. "Isn't this great?" Scott smiled warmly down on her, she was so beautiful, looking up at him like that ...
"You're great." He replied, bending over to whisper it in her ear.
"Don't you remember when we put on this play for the orphanage?'
Jean smiled, straightening, "Do I ever " She gave a fond smile, "those were the days, huh? You were dashing as Joseph."
"How about you Sam ..."Scott turned around to include the younger man sitting next to him "Do you remember when the New Mutants put it on?"
"Ah shure do , it was practically a tradition."
"And now these six are doing it."
Scott's check twitched "that's what worries me."
"Come on " Jean gave her husband a smile "You have to admit that they've been working very hard, closeting themselves up in the library for hours on end."
"Well.." Scott wasn't so sure "They've been doing _something_ in there." Jean lightly punched him.
"Don't be naughty"
"SHHH" It was about to start, and Charles eagerly waved his students into silence as he sat back, preparing to enjoy one of his favorite Christmas rituals.
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"Where's Lexi ?" Moe was beginning to panic.
"I saw her a minute ago, she was over by our stuff, looking for some water"
A horrible doubt awoke in India's mind "I'll get her , " she offered before sprinting off. Please don't have let her get into my liquor. Unbelievable as it may seem, India had always suffered from stage fright, so , predicting this, she had brought some help along, stashed away in her water bottle, for the calming in-between scene nip.
"LEXI"
"Whaaa ..." Lexi rolled over and stared up blurry " What's up doc? I'm a rabbit"
"You're suppose to be a cow! Come on , we're starting!" India stared in disbelieve at her _empty_ water bottle, it was all gone!! What was she going to do? She felt queasy.
"Coming." Lexi rolled to her feet "Mooooooowwww"
"Great " India wasn't paying attention - the butterflies were worse then ever. "Just shut up and hopefully no one will notice." The two girls ran back to Moe (the cow fish - tailing rather scarily) , who immediately tossed India out on stage, with a hissed "WERE STARTING!"
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The curtains rose slowly displaying the setting. Daemon, who had elected to be the behind the scenes man, had gone all out on the scenery. Murals hung everywhere depicting a small, modest house. Sitting in the middle of the stage, on a graceful stool, was Moe, dressed all in white, narrating as the angel. With a edidict memory, she had been the perfect one to give the most lines too. Jonathan as Joseph was hard at work carpenting, and Mary (India) was knitting rather shakily.
"Don't they look great?" Jean felt proud. She had been uncertain of what exactly might happen. It was just that things had a habit of going wrong with these six. But this... this looked great.
Scott didn't say anything. Lexi hadn't made an appearance .. it was too soon to say.
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Moe starting speaking, her slightly accented voice gave a richness to the words they had wrote, carrying them well to the back of the gym. She relaxed as she got more into the part, it was almost fun. India on the other hand was a nervous wreck. In the instant she had said her first line, the nightmarish moment in third grade came back...
It had been going so well, she had been a hit as Wendy, until Peter Pan had lifted her skirt, making her the laughing stock of the whole school...
On stage, India started to sweat.
Jonathan was having a rough time of it too. His wife was losing it. It had taken him two tries to heist her onto the Donkey, and then she had almost fallen over the other side!
He gritted his teeth, it was going to be a long night.
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In the audience, Bobby, Warren and Hank leant forward in anticipation as they prepared for the entrance of the Three Wise Men. When they had been them, their costumes had been the glory of the entire play. It was their personal opinion that no one had ever been able to match them, nevertheless, they enjoyed watching people's attempts each year.
"Here they come! "Warrens' voice faded as Lindsey stepped out onto the stage, there was a collective gasp from the audience. "My god..."
Beast blinked his eyes in amazement "are you two seeing what I'm seeing?"
Bobby felt his mouth drop open. "That's not three wise men ! - That's a three - headed wise man!"
They all stared as Lindsey's three heads looked up at a star.
"Did they even read the play?" Bobby's question was left hanging in the air.
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Lindsey was having difficulties. They hadn't actually had time for a dress rehearsal, and he hadn't realized just how ... top - heavy this thing was. Having three heads made out of paper mache were not only causing him to sway slightly, but as well, severely impeded his ability to see. He stumbled off stage, luckily finding the curtain - now to get this thing off his head ... tug......tug ....TUG .....shit.
" 'I'm afraid there is no place to stay, but you can sleep in my stable if you like.' Joseph and Mary nodded, and went to spend the night there."
Moe smiled at the audience as she waited for Daemon to lower the curtain. Scene change!
"Lexi - what is wrong with you? You're in this next scene!"
"Bok ..bok, " Moe started in amazement as the cow began clucking. "you aren't being funny." She informed it seriously. "Where's Lindsey?"
{It's STUCK on my HEAD! I can't get it off!}
"Don't - you're on again next anyway."
{But I can't see!}
"There's nothing to see! now get out there!" She took a quick glimpse. Luckily Joseph and Mary were still on stage.
With a quick pat to her hair, she checked the scenery, took her stool, and motioned to Daemon to lift the curtain.
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Back in the seats
"Well..." Jean admitted. " It is a bit different." She had been momentarily taken aback by the three headed wise man "but I like it" she continued defensively. "They were just being original."
Scott stared at his wife. But in honest truth, they were all speaking clearly, remembering lines, and at least nothing had been blown up yet. Then again ... Lexi had still yet to make an appearance. He held back judgment.
The curtain lifted again this time revealing a stable.
Joseph and Mary were bending over a cradle, while the three-headed wise man swayed ominously over them. On the other side, the Cow , having finally made it's appearance, plombed down on the hay and promptly passed out. India glanced over at Lexi. At least she hadn't said anything.
Xavier angled himself for a better look when it came time to the present the gift. Only one, but he guessed it made sense. He wondered which one out of the three they had chosen. Gold, Frankincense. or Mur.
Lindsey couldn't tell which way he was facing, but he was still able to catch the line ."GIFT!' Obediently he reached into his cloak and pulled out ...
"MY SILVERWARE!" Charles couldn't help it.
Startled Lindsey looked up, unfortunately shifting his over - weighted heads pass the point of no return. The present went flying as, arms flailing helplessly, he slowly over balanced. The cutlery made an utter racket as it hit the ground., waking the cow which then stumbled to it's feet.
My LINE My LINE!!! Were the only words running through Lexi's head, with great gusto she opened her mouth "BAAAAAAAA" And then again, just in case someone had not heard "BAAABAAAAAA"
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"Mummy , that cow is baaa -ing"
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Moe couldn't believe how everything had fallen to pieces in a matter of seconds. Lindsay was flat out on his back and struggling there like a demented turtle to get up again. The cow was .... stampeding ? Jonathan was trying to save the silverware, while Mary was just staring around at the mayhem in utter astonishment.
Off stage, Daemon misinterpreted this lack of script to assume it was the signal for his grand finale. They had one special effect in the entire play - a shooting star, that they had decided was the perfect conclusion. He lit the match.
Meanwhile, Lindsey had finally climbed to his feet again, one head now dangling grotesquely from off his left shoulder. He turned around as Lexi side swiped him and the already loose head went careering off into the audience.
In the front row, a child screamed in terror as the grinning face of a wise man disintegrated on impact at her feet.
Crowing to make any rooster proud, Lexi hurled herself forward and, for reasons that are forever unknowable, went after Lindsey's second head.
...back stage...
"Come'on light... Got it! " With a smile of triumph Daemon set the firecracker on it's carefully planned trajectory and stepped back. What a conclusion! The X-men were going to love this!
BOOM!
Now it was the X-men's turn to jump as the brightly burning firecracker made it's journey across the stage.
The cow stopped, Jonathan stopped, everyone stopped to watch it's progress. Was it going to make it across the stage? Yes..yes ...no.
Everyone watched as with a splat it landed in the manager, there was a pause before a small flame leapt up. Someone had used real hay!
"Save baby Jesus" Lexi the Cow leapt to two of her feet and dashed haphazardly towards the manager.
Thinking quickly India grabbed a near by fire extinguisher and put out the flame. Curiously she reached down through the smoke and pulled out the charred remains of someone's doll. Two more children screamed at the horror of it all.
She dropped it.
Through the smoke, Moe could see the X-men advancing through the rapidly emptying gym. Oh man.
"RUUUUNNNNN!!!!!"
They did. Or at least gave it their best shot. Lindsey, still blinded, almost impaled himself on the manger, Lexi tipped over and with a sleepy yawn decided not to get up. With still no idea on what exactly went wrong, Daemon walked out on the stage, effectively cutting off Jonathan and India's escape.
With a sigh, Moe raised her hands in a mock gesture. "We surrender."
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Later ....
"And just what do you have to say for yourselves?"
They all looked down at the ground, except for Lexi who was already there, snoring. No one said anything.
"What did you hope to accomplish ? I know Christmas doesn't mean anything to you, but it does to the people who were here tonight - and you treated it like a joke!"
Moe couldn't stand it anymore.
"That's not true! We tried our very best , honest! We spent hours making those costumes, the script, the scenary, even mathematically planning out our star's trajectory. We even got Cerebro to check our results! it should have landed in the bucket of water across the stage ... we don't know why it didn't work."
This charming discussion was interrupted by an appearance of the director of the orphanage.
"Ahh Mr. Jackson, " Xavier rolled back, "I'm sure you have some thoughts of your own to embark to these six."
"Yes." He glanced around. " Now I don't claim to have understood everything that happened tonight, " he gave the sleeping cow a puzzled look " but , I understand that even the best well planned things can have their glitches. The good news is ... " he paused as they all stared at him. There was good news ? "is that, after that ... er.... interesting play , the Mayor has promised us enough money so we can do the job right next year! A new theater, and drama club for the orphanage! Isn't it great!?"
He shook everyone's hand. "thanks very much. All of you!" With that he hurried off, leaving the X-men in opened mouthed silence.
"Come on" Xavier finally spoke up , "It's Christmas eve, let's all go home."
With a sigh, Scott slung the unconscious Cow on his shoulder as they set off back to the car.
"So ... " Jean wasn't going to let it drop. "Did you learn anything from this?"
{There's no point in trying because your going to screw it up anyway ?}
{Guess again} Jean told Lindsey.
"Because " Moe spoke for them all " Because, sometimes miracles still do happen"
{ughhh ... mushy} Lindsey tried out a telepathic moan. That was echoed by India and Jonathan.
Jean grinned.
"Come on , we still have to decorate the tree."
"The what?"
"you'll see ..."
The End
Preview!
NEXT : Tree - Hunting!!!!
Jonathan glanced skeptically at Rogue, "I don't see what the fuss is about , how hard can it be to hunt a tree? I mean , it's not like it's going anywhere."
"Ahhhh" Beast appeared beside him, giving him an appraising glance. "But you my young friend, have never hunted a Christmas Tree. It is an elusive creature; fleet of foot and sharp of twig."
Jonathan rolled his eyes at this, and even Lexi disdained to reply.
Standing nearby, Bishop overheard Beast's last comment. "Truly" He thought to himself as he reloaded his gun "This Christmas Tree is a formidable opponent. " The hunter in him stirred, he would look forward to this battle! He would bring a Christmas Tree back. He looked at Jean, one question in his heart...
" Dead or Alive?"
Jean shot him a puzzled frown "alive." Who would want a dead Christmas Tree?
Bishop ground his teeth in anticipation. The hunt had just been made harder!!
On to Chapter Thirteen: All Good Things